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HELP!! Dogs at high risk b/c of alcoholic husband!

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  • #21
    However, her husband now is threatening to put them down ASAP if she does not come up with a plan to get them.
    He's asking for a plan. Other than the otherwise part, this seems reasonable.

    get a plan.

    Comment

    • Original Poster
      #22
      I think the judgements about her leaving the dogs behind are not needed at this point. I spared a lot of details simply because its her business, not the world's. But it was a sudden, quick and he never once mentioned the dogs being an issue until she reached Philly and needed to contact him bc of her sudden inability to get access to money.

      That was when he started using the dogs as a manipulation tool and threatening their lives.

      Thank you all for the suggestions and ideas, I will quickly pass them along.
      "to each his own..."

      Comment

      • Original Poster
        #23
        and thats why I made this post, to help her get a plan. She isnt exactly in the clearest mind frame right now.
        "to each his own..."

        Comment

        • #24
          As someone who many years ago also left in the middle of the night during a drunken rage with a small child and all of my pets I can relate. I left a lot of my belongings behind but figured it was just stuff. Fortunately, I didn't have to drive across state lines, and I had a better support system then it sounds like this person has.

          She needs to get a plan in place pronto, because if he decides to, hubby can dispose of the dogs. We had a divorce case where horse was "disposed of."

          Is there a family member on his side she can contact? Sometimes they can help with trying to make safe arrangements.
          \"Tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes in it.\" Anne of Green Gables

          Comment

          • #25
            Originally posted by wendy View Post
            Would it be possible to get a cop to come along with the brave dog picker-upper? maybe try to get them at a time when the husband isn't home (guess they'd need a key to get in though- overnight a copy of the key?)
            Good lord. These are property, and in a pending divorce situation likely contested property. The "brave picker upper" can no more remove them without the husband's say-so than s/he can remove the flatscreen TV from that home.
            Proud Member Of The Lady Mafia

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            • #26
              The husband told her to remove them- therefore it's perfectly fine for her to send someone over to collect them.

              Besides, what makes you think they belong to the husband at all? my dogs were all purchased with my money, registered in my name only, microchip in my name alone, all vet bills in my name,...would be rather hard for an ex to claim they somehow belonged to him.

              Comment

              • #27
                At this point, the husband wants someone to pick them up. If I were her, I would try my hardest to make that happen as soon as possible. Why assume he won't willing release them?

                Comment

                • #28
                  Originally posted by wendy View Post
                  The husband told her to remove them- therefore it's perfectly fine for her to send someone over to collect them.

                  Besides, what makes you think they belong to the husband at all? my dogs were all purchased with my money, registered in my name only, microchip in my name alone, all vet bills in my name,...would be rather hard for an ex to claim they somehow belonged to him.
                  If they were bought during the marriage, in many jurisdictions they would be considered marital property regardless of "whose" money they were bought with. Generally protected property is that bought before the marriage, and even that has caveats (eg if the property increases in value during the marriage, that increase in value can be a shared asset).

                  And I agree, husband might be perfectly happy to let the dogs go. But OP states he's manipulative and might use them against the wife, so that's not certain. What is almost certain is that no cop is going to help with removal of what is most likely marital property without a court order, if the husband is not ok with its removal (the situation I responded to was "go in with a cop, preferably while husband isn't there").

                  The wife could go into the house and take the dogs. But some random person with cop back-up?
                  Proud Member Of The Lady Mafia

                  Comment

                  • #29
                    I read it more as " bring along a cop, in case he becomes violent/threatening" not so the cop can help the Good Samaritan 'steal' the dogs.

                    Also, I would preemptly call the county shelters and let them know what is going on and that if they are turned over to the county or whatever reason to contact person X and they will be there to get them.
                    You can't fix stupid.... but you can breed it!

                    Comment

                    • #30
                      Originally posted by Horsegal984 View Post
                      I read it more as " bring along a cop, in case he becomes violent/threatening" not so the cop can help the Good Samaritan 'steal' the dogs.

                      Also, I would preemptly call the county shelters and let them know what is going on and that if they are turned over to the county or whatever reason to contact person X and they will be there to get them.
                      Police are not going to get involved in this at this point. They have no legal ability to be doing anything.
                      "We, too, will be remembered not for victories or defeats in battle or in politics, but for our contribution to the human spirit." JFK

                      Comment

                      • #31
                        Originally posted by Coanteen View Post
                        Good lord. These are property, and in a pending divorce situation likely contested property. The "brave picker upper" can no more remove them without the husband's say-so than s/he can remove the flatscreen TV from that home.

                        This is not true at least not in VA, my abusive ex husband and I split and I had a restraining order and he was under arrest, he gave his parents a key and they came into my house destroyed my property, and stole a dog. This is only one of many things he did and because his name was on the property he was allowed to give permission to enter our house. The police were ivolved and could do nothing.

                        Comment

                        • #32
                          I have no advice and am not really close enough to help out, but I'm jingling for your friend! She was very brave to leave with her kids, and I hope everything works out with the dogs.
                          http://turtlemountainfarm.com/

                          Comment

                          • Original Poster
                            #33
                            thank you, Juliette.
                            "to each his own..."

                            Comment

                            • #34
                              Uship.com after the dogs have been gotten out into a temporary safe house.
                              America dialed 911. Donald Trump answered the phone.

                              Stop pumping money into colleges and start getting ready to earn money in the projected tradesman shortage of 2024. Make Trades Great Again!

                              Comment

                              • #35
                                Originally posted by Casey09 View Post
                                At this point, the husband wants someone to pick them up. If I were her, I would try my hardest to make that happen as soon as possible. Why assume he won't willing release them?
                                Perhaps he is trying to manipulate HER into coming for them so he can try to force her to stay or do something violent.
                                America dialed 911. Donald Trump answered the phone.

                                Stop pumping money into colleges and start getting ready to earn money in the projected tradesman shortage of 2024. Make Trades Great Again!

                                Comment

                                • #36
                                  OP, I really hope that your friend has found a plan and been able to implement it. In your OP, it read Dickson, but did you mean Dickinson? If so, then people can almost forget about LE being able to help. Dickinson has faced a HUGE population surge because of the oil patch and LEOs are taxed to the breaking point because of drugs, alcohol, homelessness, and sexual attacks. Local resources are stretched to the limit, so I don't see them caring much about a couple dogs, unfortunately.

                                  If the soon to be XH is oilfield, I would consider putting a bit of pressure on his company to facilitate (read: pay) for the transfer of the dogs via a licensed, insured, reputable shipper. The oil companies are getting reamed for the havoc their guys are causing in man camps and around town
                                  Originally posted by The Saddle
                                  Perhaps I need my flocking adjusted.

                                  Comment

                                  • #37
                                    Originally posted by RubyTuesday View Post
                                    Perhaps he is trying to manipulate HER into coming for them so he can try to force her to stay or do something violent.
                                    Safety is always the first consideration. From the OP asking about shipping and transport, it didn't sound like the wife could even go get them as she is across the country. If she could go get them, then I would think it would be wise to take several people with her and to do it when he isn't at home.
                                    Obviously posts on the Internet are always confusing. I read it as him saying he didn't want to take care of the dogs and that she needed to figure something out quickly because he wasn't going to do it for much longer. The OP didn't say he told her she had to come personally - just that if she didn't get the dogs out he'd have them put down. How do we know he won't take them to a vet and drop them off so one one can get them to her? The problem as I see it is finding a foster and transport now that she is so far away.

                                    Comment

                                    • #38
                                      Originally posted by GraceLikeRain View Post
                                      His threat does not make sense. To my knowledge no one can take a dog to ASPCA and demand that it is put down on the spot.
                                      I do not know about any other shelter but I know you are incorrect when it comes to the shelter most people use in my area. You can drop an animal off to be euthanized.


                                      Jingles for this woman, her kids and the dogs.

                                      Comment

                                      • #39
                                        One place where I lived they did euthanize on surrender at the shelter, if that's what the owner wanted. Sometimes people went to the shelter for this because it was cheaper than paying the private vets in the area.
                                        You can't fix stupid-Ron White

                                        Comment

                                        • #40
                                          Try these folks-

                                          http://pilotsnpaws.org/
                                          "Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain" ~Friedrich Schiller

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