• Welcome to the Chronicle Forums.
    Please complete your profile. The forums and the rest of www.chronofhorse.com has single sign-in, so your log in information for one will automatically work for the other. Disclaimer: The opinions expressed here are the views of the individual and do not necessarily reflect the views and opinions of The Chronicle of the Horse.



Forum rules and no-advertising policy

As a participant on this forum, it is your responsibility to know and follow our rules. Please read this message in its entirety.

Board Rules

1. You’re responsible for what you say.
As outlined in Section 230 of the Communications Decency Act, The Chronicle of the Horse and its affiliates, as well Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd., the developers of vBulletin, are not legally responsible for statements made in the forums.

This is a public forum viewed by a wide spectrum of people, so please be mindful of what you say and who might be reading it—details of personal disputes are likely better handled privately. While posters are legally responsible for their statements, the moderators may in their discretion remove or edit posts that violate these rules. Users have the ability to modify or delete their own messages after posting, but administrators generally will not delete posts, threads or accounts upon request.

Outright inflammatory, vulgar, harassing, malicious or otherwise inappropriate statements and criminal charges unsubstantiated by a reputable news source or legal documentation will not be tolerated and will be dealt with at the discretion of the moderators.

2. Conversations in horse-related forums should be horse-related.
The forums are a wonderful source of information and support for members of the horse community. While it’s understandably tempting to share information or search for input on other topics upon which members might have a similar level of knowledge, members must maintain the focus on horses.

3. Keep conversations productive, on topic and civil.
Discussion and disagreement are inevitable and encouraged; personal insults, diatribes and sniping comments are unproductive and unacceptable. Whether a subject is light-hearted or serious, keep posts focused on the current topic and of general interest to other participants of that thread. Utilize the private message feature or personal email where appropriate to address side topics or personal issues not related to the topic at large.

4. No advertising in the discussion forums.
Posts in the discussion forums directly or indirectly advertising horses, jobs, items or services for sale or wanted will be removed at the discretion of the moderators. Use of the private messaging feature or email addresses obtained through users’ profiles for unsolicited advertising is not permitted.

Company representatives may participate in discussions and answer questions about their products or services, or suggest their products on recent threads if they fulfill the criteria of a query. False "testimonials" provided by company affiliates posing as general consumers are not appropriate, and self-promotion of sales, ad campaigns, etc. through the discussion forums is not allowed.

Paid advertising is available on our classifieds site and through the purchase of banner ads. The tightly monitored Giveaways forum permits free listings of genuinely free horses and items available or wanted (on a limited basis). Items offered for trade are not allowed.

Advertising Policy Specifics
When in doubt of whether something you want to post constitutes advertising, please contact a moderator privately in advance for further clarification. Refer to the following points for general guidelines:

Horses – Only general discussion about the buying, leasing, selling and pricing of horses is permitted. If the post contains, or links to, the type of specific information typically found in a sales or wanted ad, and it’s related to a horse for sale, regardless of who’s selling it, it doesn’t belong in the discussion forums.

Stallions – Board members may ask for suggestions on breeding stallion recommendations. Stallion owners may reply to such queries by suggesting their own stallions, only if their horse fits the specific criteria of the original poster. Excessive promotion of a stallion by its owner or related parties is not permitted and will be addressed at the discretion of the moderators.

Services – Members may use the forums to ask for general recommendations of trainers, barns, shippers, farriers, etc., and other members may answer those requests by suggesting themselves or their company, if their services fulfill the specific criteria of the original post. Members may not solicit other members for business if it is not in response to a direct, genuine query.

Products – While members may ask for general opinions and suggestions on equipment, trailers, trucks, etc., they may not list the specific attributes for which they are in the market, as such posts serve as wanted ads.

Event Announcements – Members may post one notification of an upcoming event that may be of interest to fellow members, if the original poster does not benefit financially from the event. Such threads may not be “bumped” excessively. Premium members may post their own notices in the Event Announcements forum.

Charities/Rescues – Announcements for charitable or fundraising events can only be made for 501(c)(3) tax-exempt organizations. Special exceptions may be made, at the moderators’ discretion and direction, for board-related events or fundraising activities in extraordinary circumstances.

Occasional posts regarding horses available for adoption through IRS-registered horse rescue or placement programs are permitted in the appropriate forums, but these threads may be limited at the discretion of the moderators. Individuals may not advertise or make announcements for horses in need of rescue, placement or adoption unless the horse is available through a recognized rescue or placement agency or government-run entity or the thread fits the criteria for and is located in the Giveaways forum.

5. Do not post copyrighted photographs unless you have purchased that photo and have permission to do so.

6. Respect other members.
As members are often passionate about their beliefs and intentions can easily be misinterpreted in this type of environment, try to explore or resolve the inevitable disagreements that arise in the course of threads calmly and rationally.

If you see a post that you feel violates the rules of the board, please click the “alert” button (exclamation point inside of a triangle) in the bottom left corner of the post, which will alert ONLY the moderators to the post in question. They will then take whatever action, or no action, as deemed appropriate for the situation at their discretion. Do not air grievances regarding other posters or the moderators in the discussion forums.

Please be advised that adding another user to your “Ignore” list via your User Control Panel can be a useful tactic, which blocks posts and private messages by members whose commentary you’d rather avoid reading.

7. We have the right to reproduce statements made in the forums.
The Chronicle of the Horse may copy, quote, link to or otherwise reproduce posts, or portions of posts, in print or online for advertising or editorial purposes, if attributed to their original authors, and by posting in this forum, you hereby grant to The Chronicle of the Horse a perpetual, non-exclusive license under copyright and other rights, to do so.

8. We reserve the right to enforce and amend the rules.
The moderators may delete, edit, move or close any post or thread at any time, or refrain from doing any of the foregoing, in their discretion, and may suspend or revoke a user’s membership privileges at any time to maintain adherence to the rules and the general spirit of the forum. These rules may be amended at any time to address the current needs of the board.

Please see our full Terms of Service and Privacy Policy for more information.

Thanks for being a part of the COTH forums!

(Revised 1/26/16)
See more
See less

Dog destroying relationship - WWYD?

  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Well, this thread changed before I could post. The show "Barking mad" has a few episodes on this specific subject (husband's dog aggresive toward new wife/girlfriend).
    I liked the hosts approach (not a fan of Ceasar, nice guy, too strong). Host said the heirarchy in house was husband, dog, wife. Her suggestions basically moved the wife up the heirarchy. Wife took total care of dog, ate food from dog's bowl first then gave dog the bowl etc. It was funny seeing the wife get alpha-mare training. Anyway it appeared to work.id google for those shows.


    • Originally posted by magnolia73 View Post
      If y'all have never lost your temper at a dog that trashed your house and bit at you, I am suprised. I have lost my temper on my dog, who neither cowers or fears me. I don't feel particularly bad about it, as it corrected a few issues.

      Also, have any of y'all tried to rehome dogs in this economy? I get rid of my problem dog because a no-kill rescue had pawned a cat off on me a few years ago and boxers are desirable in our area. It's not a quick and easy process. Nor would I rehome a dog or deal with someone openly critical of me.

      She's in a bad situation. Nobody wants to take a dog that messes in the house and bites to the pound. Not everyone wants to be a financial and time slave to a dog they don't like.
      The OP hasn't tried to rehome the dog. It SOUNDS, actually, like the boyfriend is willing to do it but the OP has said no because she 'doesn't want to be the bad guy.' Frankly I have a lot more sympathy for HIM. The bf's father also sounds like he would consider taking the dog.

      And anyone who crates a cross between two high-energy breeds for 21 hours a day deserves what they get. The dog's at minimum stir-crazy. I've lost my temper with my dogs once or twice (not over messing in the house--Puff is old and if he pees it's because I ignored his signal that he needs to go out. My fault, not his.) If locking the dog in its "den" so it can't burn off any energy and can't void for 21 hours is the 'solution', get rid of the dog or tell the vet it bites and you want it put down. If you're REALLY vindictive, pay whatever the surrender fee is and let the county shelter take it.
      Author Page
      Like Omens In the Night on Facebook
      Steampunk Sweethearts


      • Originally posted by Doodlebug1 View Post
        OMG. Get rid of that dog now. Saturday Night Live was much more polite than I could ever be about your post.

        With that attitude, you are just not a dog person. Not at all. There is no chance of fixing this, please let the dog have a chance at life somewhere else, or Euth.

        I hope you are better with your proposed kids than you are with other species because your attitude really, really sucks.

        This is the saddest post I have read in a long time.
        True. No where have I read that OP even took the dog to a Vet to rule out a urinary tract infection, or to see if the dog is old enough it might also have incontinence that would respond to the drug Proin, in addition to the obvious fear related peeing. Sigh...poor little dog...definitely needs to be rehomed or euth'd if the cause is not medical and treatable.

        I agree that OP should think long and hard about having kids. If she and her fiancee are too busy to take proper care of dogs, how in hell would they/who would be taking care of children?
        RIP Sasha, best dog ever, pictured shortly before she died, Death either by euthanasia or natural causes is only the end of the animal inhabiting its body; I believe the spirit lives on.


        • Originally posted by Auventera Two View Post
          Then you recognize and accept that there is a problem and you get the dog the proper training and socialization that is needed. And if you cannot or will not, then you rehome the dog. Period.


          Crating a very high energy JRT/Beagle mix for 21 hours a day, for starters.

          Scolding a dog to the point she submissively cowers and wets.

          Denying the dog socialization and training which is necessary to secure her a positive, productive member within the pack.

          I don't believe that anyone here wants to live in a house full of dog crap and pee. But unlike you, when we have that issue, we take the steps necessary to get the dog the training required. We set the dog up for success, reward good behavior, and provide boundaries that help prevent the undesired behavior.

          You have added pack members and not taken the initiative to work through the inevitable issues. You have denied the dog any kind of socialization and exercise. You have resorted to anger and punishment when the dog behaves inappropriately. You have redirected all your life's troubles and projected them onto this dog. The dog is "ruining your relationship?" Oh please. No one can ruin your own life except for YOU. You are honestly going to lay all the blame on a little 20 pound dog for "ruining your life?" That is insane.

          What would "I" do? Exactly the opposite of everything YOU have done.

          I will outline it for you:

          1. EXERCISE. Walks, frisbee, bike rides, runs, obstacles, more walks.

          2. Controlled and supervised access to the house. On a leash, tied to your belt ALWAYS until the soiling behavior is eliminated.

          3. Lavish rewards for eliminating where you want the dog to eliminate - outside. Yummy liver or bacon and "Goooood girl!!!" then lots of pats and belly rubs for eliminating appropriately.

          4. Inappropriate elimination won't happen if the dog is leashed at ALL times. But if it does, you ignore it, clean it up, and vow to do YOUR job better next time.

          Do you honestly thing that poor little pup is going to come to you and ask to go outside when you regularly literally scare the piss out of the dog? Seriously? If you are this angry and hateful on the internet with regard to the dog, I can only imagine how you actually behave with the dog. The dog is probably scared out of her mind of you! Biting you - cowering - submissive wetting - inappropriate elimination. The poor thing is scared out of her mind.

          5. Proper socialization and play time with the other dogs.

          6. Structure, schedule, crated for only a few hours at a time.

          7. More EXERCISE. Playing, frisbee, walks, runs, interaction with the other dogs in the yard.

          8. Enlist the help of a behaviorist to address the biting issue. (FYI - my hound bit me when he was a pup - actually he attacked me over a pig ear. I immediately got the help of a behaviorist because I knew this could NOT happen again. )

          9. Rinse, repeat. Over and over again.

          When you have a baby and the toddler is soiling her clothes instead of using the big potty, are you going to yell at her and throw her in her room for 21 hours and tell her what a horrible little rat she is, and you wish she'd just die so she'd quit ruining your life? This is what you're doing to the dog. People who abuse animals usually abuse the people in their lives as well.
          This is the best post on this topic thread! Especially point 4 and the last paragraph. I feel sorry for the dog.

          ETA I just found this older thread. OP is indeed just 23:
          Last edited by sdlbredfan; Nov. 24, 2011, 03:02 PM. Reason: content
          RIP Sasha, best dog ever, pictured shortly before she died, Death either by euthanasia or natural causes is only the end of the animal inhabiting its body; I believe the spirit lives on.


          • Originally posted by threedogpack View Post
            Bounceback, where are you located and can you get this dog to me?
            Bless your heart, now that is a helpful idea!
            RIP Sasha, best dog ever, pictured shortly before she died, Death either by euthanasia or natural causes is only the end of the animal inhabiting its body; I believe the spirit lives on.


            • I think someone else had the right idea. Take GSD and move out. The BF doesn't sound like a great catch, in fact he sounds like a miserable future esp. if you have kids. He's basically one more big kid. Let him figure it all out. IT's his dog and it sounds like he created the monster to begin with by not training her at ALL.
              Every mighty oak was once a nut that stood its ground.

              Proud Closet Canterer! Member Riders with Fibromyalgia clique.


              • Originally posted by alibi_18 View Post
                Does this explanation make it more correct to be neglectful and abusive towards a dog?

                People are stupid and don't want to take their responsibilities.
                Unable to be rehomed? Euthanized.

                This is cruelty.
                All I did was agree w/ Magnolia73 and her assertion that good homes are in short supply right now.

                Times are tough and folks are dumping dogs left and right. Adoptions are down, it's hard to find REALLY NICE dogs a home.

                How in the world do you jump to the conclusion that I am condoning how the OP treats her dog(s)?

                The fact that it is difficult to re-home a dog in this economic climate has NOTHING to do with the fact that cruelty is STILL cruelty, and neglect is still neglect!

                Sheesh! Don't put words in my mouth.
                Proud Native Texan!
                owned by 3 Cardigan Corgi's + 3 wonderful horses!