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Dog destroying relationship - WWYD?

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  • #41
    So this dog was fine when being the only dog and was fine when you brought you Gsd in but now that there are 3 dogs it has developed these problems?
    Why would you choose to get rid of the dog that was there first? Why not the newest dog since there was no problem before it came into your house?
    I feel bad for dogs that when situations change and they dont deal well, people just get rid of them. This dog didnt ask for the 3rd dog to come into its home and it was just fine before that.

    Comment


    • #42
      Originally posted by Bounceback View Post
      , but the jack x... not a chance, you discipline her, she gets mad, crouches down, and low and behold, pees...

      ...
      That's not a dog getting mad...that's a dog that is being fearful, and peeing out of submissive urination.

      When you say you discipline the dog, what do you do? If you are yelling, alpha rolling, smacking, rubbing dog's nose in accidents, then you are only making your dog more fearful and teaching it that biting is the only way to defend itself.
      The peeing when you aren't around may be the result of you yelling/discipling the dog for accidents. They learn to pee when you aren't around.
      I'd have a vet check out the dog including a T-4 thyroid test, as a low thyroid can cause aggression. But truthfully, I think your disciplining has made the dog fearful, and she's biting out of fear. Plus the lack of exercise (you said she's only out of the crate for 3 hrs a day), will increase anxiety levels.

      Comment

      • Original Poster

        #43
        Originally posted by godiva13 View Post
        So this dog was fine when being the only dog and was fine when you brought you Gsd in but now that there are 3 dogs it has developed these problems?
        Why would you choose to get rid of the dog that was there first? Why not the newest dog since there was no problem before it came into your house?
        I feel bad for dogs that when situations change and they dont deal well, people just get rid of them. This dog didnt ask for the 3rd dog to come into its home and it was just fine before that.
        No, dog apparently did this as a single dog as well.

        As for the "your a bad dog owner" comments, We BOTH work full time jobs, summer its easier to get them out longer, winter its harder and not always possible. But they DO get let out to run and exercise. - But I'm not a person to let my life be run by a stupid dog! It's a DOG for crying out loud. She's not being neglected, starved, beat or anything.

        Some of you may take the time to "fix" this dog, we do not have that kind of time, not anymore, We did, we were trying and nothing we did seemed to make a difference. Some of you may be perfectly ok with living in a house that reeks of dog urine, I am not. Some of you may be ok with being bit, snapped at, growled at, I am not. If we could leave her out of the crate without her going in the house, we would, but I have spent numerous hours, days trying to minimize the smell of dog urine out of the house. I can't have it, I can't live with it and I refuse to do so.

        And back to the kids thing, She is GREAT with kids, and has been, my sister brought her 2 year old daughter over here a lot, dog is fine, But that was when it was just HER. I'm not willing to take a chance, I'm just not, She bites me, she'd bite a kid. She'd be great in a home with kids, and a smaller/medium sized dog, but not two others.

        For me, IMO It's too much in the house, 2 adults, 3 dogs. Too many bodies

        Why get rid of the first dog? Because the GSD is ALL I have left, I mys well have gone through a divorce, I lost damn-near everything, the dog is all I have left, she is NOT going anywhere. She's trained, no bite, growl, kids can jump on her, put their hands in the food bowl while she's eating, anything! She's grown up with atleast 4 kids around her at all time. She could care less, Pit, also could care less, reach in her bowl, take her toys, anything, Other one, you'd be losing a hand. As well the other two are potty trained, no matter what, they will hold it until we get home, wake up anything, you can trust them alone in the house. I've had my gsd for 5 years, (got her when she was 7weeks old) she's put one tooth in me, she was cutting teeth, only reason, I have more scars from the jack x in the past year than I have my gsd all her life.

        Bottom line is, I can't live with a dog who does what she is doing. End of story

        Comment


        • #44
          Originally posted by Bounceback View Post
          No, dog apparently did this as a single dog as well.
          Earlier you said she was fine with just one other dog, now she isn't? Get your story straight before seeking sympathy.

          As for the "your a bad dog owner" comments, We BOTH work full time jobs, summer its easier to get them out longer, winter its harder and not always possible. But they DO get let out to run and exercise.
          You lock the dog in a crate for 21 hours a day. She isn't getting enough exercise. End of story.

          But I'm not a person to let my life be run by a stupid dog! It's a DOG for crying out loud.
          Then you shouldn't have animals. Not that you should let your life be run by your pets, but you should at least be meeting their basic needs, and you aren't. Not only are you not meeting their basic needs, you're pitching a hissy fit about what you do do for them. Seriously - get real. It's a dog not a stuffed animal.

          She's not being neglected, starved, beat or anything.
          I suppose that depends on your definition of neglect...

          Some of you may take the time to "fix" this dog, we do not have that kind of time, not anymore, We did, we were trying and nothing we did seemed to make a difference.
          Then get rid of the dog. But please, for the love, don't get another one.


          Some of you may be perfectly ok with living in a house that reeks of dog urine, I am not. Some of you may be ok with being bit, snapped at, growled at, I am not. If we could leave her out of the crate without her going in the house, we would, but I have spent numerous hours, days trying to minimize the smell of dog urine out of the house. I can't have it, I can't live with it and I refuse to do so.
          She isn't doing it to punish you. Really - she's a dog. As her owner, it is your responsibility to figure out why she is acting out and FIX THE PROBLEM. She isn't doing it to be vindictive - she's doing it because she isn't being cared for properly.

          For me, IMO It's too much in the house, 2 adults, 3 dogs. Too many bodies
          Then why did you move in with someone that already had a dog and then get a third dog?

          Why get rid of the first dog? Because the GSD is ALL I have left, I mys well have gone through a divorce, I lost damn-near everything, the dog is all I have left, she is NOT going anywhere.
          But your fiancee should get rid of his dog? Makes total sense.

          Bottom line is, I can't live with a dog who does what she is doing. End of story
          OP, you sound incredibly self centered. Ridiculously so. My suggestion? Get rid of the pets. And think twice before having kids, because those require work and self-sacrifice too.
          "Are you yawning? You don't ride well enough to yawn. I can yawn, because I ride better than you. Meredith Michael Beerbaum can yawn. But you? Not so much..."
          -George Morris

          Comment


          • #45
            Originally posted by SaturdayNightLive View Post
            Earlier you said she was fine with just one other dog, now she isn't? Get your story straight before seeking sympathy.



            You lock the dog in a crate for 21 hours a day. She isn't getting enough exercise. End of story.



            Then you shouldn't have animals. Not that you should let your life be run by your pets, but you should at least be meeting their basic needs, and you aren't. Not only are you not meeting their basic needs, you're pitching a hissy fit about what you do do for them. Seriously - get real. It's a dog not a stuffed animal.



            I suppose that depends on your definition of neglect...



            Then get rid of the dog. But please, for the love, don't get another one.




            She isn't doing it to punish you. Really - she's a dog. As her owner, it is your responsibility to figure out why she is acting out and FIX THE PROBLEM. She isn't doing it to be vindictive - she's doing it because she isn't being cared for properly.



            Then why did you move in with someone that already had a dog and then get a third dog?



            But your fiancee should get rid of his dog? Makes total sense.



            OP, you sound incredibly self centered. Ridiculously so. My suggestion? Get rid of the pets. And think twice before having kids, because those require work and self-sacrifice too.
            This post is dead on. Where's the "like" button.

            Comment


            • #46
              OP, I hear your frustration. And, since none of us are there, none of us can say anything about what type of dog owner you are (at least, *shouldn't* be). But my impression, from what you've said, is that the dog is peeing out of fear, more than anger. Maybe try changing the way she's disciplined? And, if possible (at least in good weather) setting up a kennel or run outside for her (or all of them?) For when no one is home? Good luck, whatever you decide.
              Different Times Equestrian Ventures at Hidden Spring Ranch
              www.DifferentTimesEquestrianVentures.com

              Comment


              • #47
                bounceback wrote:
                Bottom line is, I can't live with a dog who does what she is doing.

                then either place her or euth her. You've made up your mind now, so all that is left is to decide how/which route to take.

                Comment


                • #48
                  OP, you do sound super stressed. I think you're wadded up about just going ahead and doing what you have to do. You know you want her gone, you sound too busy and stressed to deal with this. You know what you want but you don't want to have to do it. Where your SO falls in this scenario you still haven't really mentioned except to say that he's going in for a surgery? Better get this dog lined out before then.

                  It's a dog, it's not a child. I hate that comparison, it's not a freaking human, it's a dog behaving badly. If the dog had already bit a small child you would hear different responses here. It bites, it's showing its fear through aggression and you are not in a situation to deal with it. Fix this for yourself, your dog and your SO. Keep your good easy dogs and figure something out for this one.
                  “Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.” Stephen R. Covey

                  Comment


                  • #49
                    OMG. Get rid of that dog now. Saturday Night Live was much more polite than I could ever be about your post.

                    With that attitude, you are just not a dog person. Not at all. There is no chance of fixing this, please let the dog have a chance at life somewhere else, or Euth.

                    I hope you are better with your proposed kids than you are with other species because your attitude really, really sucks.

                    This is the saddest post I have read in a long time.

                    Comment


                    • #50
                      Originally posted by SaturdayNightLive View Post
                      Earlier you said she was fine with just one other dog, now she isn't? Get your story straight before seeking sympathy.



                      You lock the dog in a crate for 21 hours a day. She isn't getting enough exercise. End of story.



                      Then you shouldn't have animals. Not that you should let your life be run by your pets, but you should at least be meeting their basic needs, and you aren't. Not only are you not meeting their basic needs, you're pitching a hissy fit about what you do do for them. Seriously - get real. It's a dog not a stuffed animal.



                      I suppose that depends on your definition of neglect...



                      Then get rid of the dog. But please, for the love, don't get another one.




                      She isn't doing it to punish you. Really - she's a dog. As her owner, it is your responsibility to figure out why she is acting out and FIX THE PROBLEM. She isn't doing it to be vindictive - she's doing it because she isn't being cared for properly.



                      Then why did you move in with someone that already had a dog and then get a third dog?



                      But your fiancee should get rid of his dog? Makes total sense.



                      OP, you sound incredibly self centered. Ridiculously so. My suggestion? Get rid of the pets. And think twice before having kids, because those require work and self-sacrifice too.
                      GREAT POST!!!!
                      Proud Native Texan!
                      owned by 3 Cardigan Corgi's + 3 wonderful horses!

                      Comment


                      • #51
                        How about build a nice large outdoor run and nice outdoor dog house for them, with cement, and grass, easy to clean. You can buy one of those tough sheds and put in a couch for the dog with a heater so you don't have to deal with the dog or worry about the dog going to the bathroom in the house.

                        Comment


                        • #52
                          Originally posted by MunchingonHay View Post
                          Honestly, I did not read all of the posts, and I will most likely get flamed for this;


                          I would NOT have a dog that bit period. That dog would have an appt the next day. I would not adopt it out, or give it away, I would PTS ASAP. I could not live with knowing that a dog that I knew bit people around with other people.

                          and you are thinking of giving her to the father in law....what are you going to do when you take the kid over to their house ?

                          There are too many GREAT dogs in pounds/shelters/rescues that need good homes.
                          Amen! There are SO many dogs looking for homes that would NEVER dream of biting ANYONE, why put up with a dog that leaves scars on you?
                          Proud Native Texan!
                          owned by 3 Cardigan Corgi's + 3 wonderful horses!

                          Comment


                          • #53
                            Because strangers on the internet will insult you and question your ability to be a parent if you rehome the dog?
                            “Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.” Stephen R. Covey

                            Comment


                            • #54
                              Well, you're certainly not the first person in history to become "over-dogged" and realize you made a mistake. Maybe the first dog was fine alone...maybe not. Maybe the 2nd dog didn't affect things too much. But certainly it seems that the 3rd dog pushed everything over the top.

                              Not many choices, really.

                              Either go back to two dogs, or fix it. Sounds like you don't have the time and resources to fix the problem, so you need to go back to two dogs (or no dogs).

                              I would think rehoming the biter/pee-er will be next to impossible unless it's to a friend that is helping you out.

                              Maybe rehoming the pit puppy? Or euthanizing the biter....although a vet check wouldn't be out of the question (dogs in pain are probably more likely to bite and pee....)

                              It seems like you want people to support your decision but it wasn't clear until the end that you already decided you want to euthanize the Jack/Beagle cross? I think a lot of people would support the idea of euthanizing a biter, but I guess it's hard to know if that is really the problem.

                              Do have to agree about the kids thing.....if you think you have a mess now and no time to deal with it....watch out. We laugh at how we were when "all we had" was two dogs.

                              Comment


                              • #55
                                You've already made up your mind that you are done with this dog. Since this dog has a biting history and you are unwilling to work with a trainer or invest a seconds more time in this animal, you should euthanize. It really seems like the only ethical option you have left unless someone you know steps forward and says "please give me your dog with fear-aggression issues."

                                Comment


                                • #56
                                  Bounceback wrote
                                  Some of you may be perfectly ok with living in a house that reeks of dog urine, I am not. Some of you may be ok with being bit, snapped at, growled at, I am not.
                                  Well, no. I work hard at potty-training. I carefully supervise and take outside for treats. I have a fairly young dog, and when I first got him it was difficult to find the energy sometimes but I wanted him to master housetraining. I also work with my dogs on putting my hand in their food (I add better stuff) and on "give" so that I can take objects away from them. With my young guy, if I am doing something else I incorporate that into it.

                                  Bounceback wrote
                                  But I'm not a person to let my life be run by a stupid dog! It's a DOG for crying out loud. She's not being neglected, starved, beat or anything.
                                  Why do you have dogs? Especially of *all* high maintenance breeds? Your dog shouldn't run your life, but as an owner I am responsible for what type of life my dogs have. That's a big responsibility. Yes, it's just a dog, but dogs are thinking and feeling beings, and totally dependent on us for all of their experiences.

                                  Many people do have dogs and work full-time. Some people might be retired or independently wealthy, but a lot work.

                                  Pcostx wrote
                                  Amen! There are SO many dogs looking for homes that would NEVER dream of biting ANYONE, why put up with a dog that leaves scars on you?
                                  Sure, there are dogs in shelters,. Most have teeth and would, indeed, dream of biting someone for the right trigger. All dogs take work, including desensitization to someone near their food bowl and to giving up valued items like toys and bones. Defensiveness in those situations are fairly common dog behaviors. I think you would find that a number of shelters will actually work on those issues. In addition, if you get a young dog from a shelter they will likely tell you what steps you need to take to prevent this type of aggression.

                                  I am not sure exactly what the point of this whole post is. Obviously it was not for advice on how to fix this problem. Was it for advice on how to rehome the dog? Was it for permission to rehome or euthanize the dog? I guess at this point, the dog can't stay in this home so either rehome the dog to an experienced owner willing to work with a trainer to rehabilitate the dog, or euthanize the dog.

                                  Comment


                                  • #57
                                    Originally posted by cowboymom View Post
                                    Because strangers on the internet will insult you and question your ability to be a parent if you rehome the dog?
                                    It's just that I'm pretty sure crating a kid for 21 hours a day would be frowned upon.
                                    "Are you yawning? You don't ride well enough to yawn. I can yawn, because I ride better than you. Meredith Michael Beerbaum can yawn. But you? Not so much..."
                                    -George Morris

                                    Comment


                                    • #58
                                      Wow. Normally I stay away from this section because I'm not an expert on these matters. I have 3 dogs and 2 cats. The cats rule. Dogs are GSD, Staffy cross, jack/border collie cross. Being outside, dog play time, consistent behavoir from the humans and I have wonderful dogs. Both me and my husband work and if we are to be away for the day I get someone to let my dogs out for a quick run and pee. Pay someone if you have to. It is not rocket science to keep dogs happy. I crate as puppies and that's it. Once bathroom rules are established I couldn't imagine keeping one locked up like that.

                                      And I understand the house thing to a degree. Right now my dogs spend the morning out. A good 5-6 hours. The entire farm is a quagmire of mud. Takes an awful lot of extra work to keep dogs and house clean. Afternoon and evening runs are limited at the moment mostly due to weather. Nobody has issues. And trust me that jack/BC cross is an energy ball. They love their house and being in with their humans.

                                      Personally you disrupted this dog's life. I know you probably didn't mean to but from your posts it seems you have treated this dog with nothing but contempt. She's not stupid. I probably would have examined vet reasons too as I'm not a dog expert like many on this board. But in general terms you and SO have failed this dog misreably. I'm sure you didn't mean to but that's what's happened. Most likely a euth case at this stage which also is not her fault.

                                      It's very sad really.

                                      Terri
                                      COTH, keeping popcorn growers in business for years.

                                      "I need your grace to remind me to find my own." Snow Patrol-Chasing Cars. This line reminds me why I have horses.

                                      Comment


                                      • #59
                                        Any sympathy I might have had for the OP has vanished with her subsequent posts.

                                        No, the dog isn't a kid.
                                        But the dog is not being treated fairly or compassionately.
                                        "It's like a Russian nesting doll of train wrecks."--CaitlinandTheBay

                                        ...just settin' on the Group W bench.

                                        Comment


                                        • #60
                                          I was sympathetic to the OP originally, but now I'm depressed. She's clearly stressed out to the point of utterly blind, deaf, desperate self-pity. And that makes me suspect the BF is the root problem, because that sort of hysterical anger is often the result of a woman who desperately needs her partner's help but can only get it by having a meltdown. The dog will apparently end up being put to death because its owner is a man who isn't into dealing with problems and is involved with a woman who 1) he feels comfortable dumping life's little issues onto and 2) is herself unable to confront problems outside dramatic denoument moments.

                                          I am normally not sympathetic to the idea that a biter isn't a problem dog but just had problem owners; most biters are problem dogs. But in this case, this dog seems to be a normal dog who's developed into a fear biter due to stress, neglect and abuse (yes, 21 hours in a crate is abuse) and it's sick that they're euthanize her as a behavior problem.

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