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the Very Bad Cat: an introduction

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  • #21
    Too funny.
    Puck sounds like my sister's cat Goose. Now that we look back, Goose was probably a self-fulfilling prophecy. Goose is black, and we are quite sure he was kicked out of hell for being a PITA. Thusly, he ended up with my sister. Goose has an oral fixation, and believes he must chew upon everything that can fit into his mouth. His favorite are apartment window blinds, which of course come in a length that my sister is unable to find anywhere. We cannot have toilet paper on the dispenser, or my sister will return to her apartment to find it strewn up and down the hallway. He enjoys eating her toilet lid cover and anything that is made of a paper base (magazines, cardboard, styrofoam, etc).

    My cat Allen is not destructive. He is just weird. I have resigned myself to love him.

    As you can see, Allen is the king of the household. He is unbelievably loveable and snuggly, and who could deny this face?. He is also creepily obsessive. I always have a partner when I need to use the restroom, as Allen will patiently sit and wait outside the doorframe until I return to the couch. My lap is his personal property, and if it is otherwise occupied... well, Allen says too bad.

    He does have his odd tendencies. He is quite the beg hog. We believe he is a dog in a cat's body, and you need to watch your feet - Allen finds it very acceptable to collapse and roll over in front of you as you are walking to demand a belly rub.

    If you are a posesssor of food, of any kind, Allen will politely stalk you around the apartment to remind you that he would like some. Allen also hears voices. It is common for me to return home and find him patiently staring at the wall or ceiling in hopes that it will talk to him. In Allen's world, door rugs are not meant to stay in one place. They are instead the best toys and hiding places EVER. Allen also believes he possesses the ability to become invisible.

    I repeat, he is weird. I have full knowledge.
    Lucy (Precious Star) - 1994 TB mare; happily reunited with her colt Touch the Stars


    • #22
      Oh my gosh. The facebook play by play was AWESOME!!!

      I now have the urge to go get rascal some cat nip...

      my barn cat: Buster.. who is actually half dog/half human (according to him) does not see what the big deal about catnip is. He takes offense to me even trying it on him lol.

      I LOVE cats that geek out with it. I could laugh for hours.

      Rascal does not eat anything that's not cat food... (where as buster will eat just about anything)..

      ...hrm...what to do.
      "Never let the fear of striking out, keep you from playing the game."


      • #23
        Shune... I love it!

        Serious question: Not that I want to right now (baby steps). But do you all believe kitteh's should have a partner? Right now Rascal is all in his own. But the people I got him from said, while he did get along with everyone, he was dominant, especially over food.

        Food for thought =)
        "Never let the fear of striking out, keep you from playing the game."


        • #24

          "Never let the fear of striking out, keep you from playing the game."


          • Original Poster

            Originally posted by starrunner View Post
            He also removed the fish tank lid and liked to drink out of it. I thought if he fell into the tank once or twice he'd not try it anymore. Unfortunately, the tactic didn't work and I just ended up refilling the fish tank constantly.
            When your brother brings him back, I have two bits of advice.
            1. They make clips to hold tank lids on. I highly recommend them. I had a rat, so it was very important hat Puck not get the tank open.Despite the fact that he was perfectly aware of how to open lids, Puck was never able to get the clips off (they require thumbs, which he thankfully lacks).

            2. Get a second cat. Preferably another young male.Getting Peri was the best thing I've ever done for Puck. They love each other. A friend was visiting recently. She had been here for about two hours (during which time the cats never stopped wrestling/beating the crap out of each other) before she said... "do they EVER sleep?" ...rarely.


            • #26
              There's a really funny book called "Bad Kitty gets a Bath!".... ;=)
              Nudging "Almost Heaven" a little closer still...


              • Original Poster

                Originally posted by Belg View Post
                There's a really funny book called "Bad Kitty gets a Bath!".... ;=)
                oh yes. Bad kitties DEFINITELY get baths.

                (I'm allergic. Mine get weekly baths. They're pros, it takes about 2 minutes per cat.)


                • #28
                  Schune* Oops! My apologies.
                  "Never let the fear of striking out, keep you from playing the game."


                  • #29
                    Originally posted by DontStrikeOut View Post
                    Shune... I love it!

                    Serious question: Not that I want to right now (baby steps). But do you all believe kitteh's should have a partner? Right now Rascal is all in his own. But the people I got him from said, while he did get along with everyone, he was dominant, especially over food.

                    Food for thought =)
                    I'm starting grad school in the fall and will be living by myself, so I am seriously contemplating getting Allen a little brother after the first of the year. I'd definitely go back to the rescue I adopted Allen from, so finding one would definitely not be an issue.

                    I already have a name picked out - Albert, Bert for short.

                    Lucy (Precious Star) - 1994 TB mare; happily reunited with her colt Touch the Stars


                    • #30
                      =). I am out of the house a lot between work, daycare and the horses. But I live in an apartment...not sure how I feel about TWO smellies under the same small(er) roof.

                      That and I think rascal sleeps while we're gone too. I think he sleeps a lot lol.

                      But maybe he would enjoy company?

                      Perhaps I should give it more than a week lol.
                      "Never let the fear of striking out, keep you from playing the game."


                      • #31
                        Lazy Pal, I LOVE IT!!! Please keep posting his adventures. What a little stinker!
                        "Aye God, Woodrow..."


                        • #32
                          I know all about kittehs staring mindlessly at walls. Mine also yammer at the ceiling, hoping to contact ceiling cat I guess, and yammer into the vents, basement cat is my guess!

                          I reject your reality, and substitute my own- Adam Savage

                          R.I.P Ron Smith, you'll be greatly missed


                          • #33
                            Sounds like you need to learn the Corporal Cuddling technique (~4:30)!
                            "Things turn out best for the people who make the best of the way things turn out." ~John Wooden

                            Phoenix Animal Rescue


                            • #34
                              Originally posted by Lazy Palomino Hunter View Post
                              Does anyone else live with a cat that makes them feel like they have a monkey for a pet?
                              No, I live with the three. Lately I refer to them as Charlie Sheen and His Goddesses. They enjoy eating tape, cardboard, and chocolate — yes, I KNOW what chocolate does to their digestion. They also enjoy removing ALL the clean clothes from the bottom drawer because clean clothes get in the way of their naps, knocking over drinks to get your attention, and mutilating expensive scarves — never the cheap scarves, because they are rock stars.

                              Serious, Lazy Pal, I think there's children's picture book waiting to happen in your post!
                              "Go on, Bill — this is no place for a pony."


                              • #35
                                Wow your cat is pretty bad!

                                I have 3 and they all have their own "fun" traits. While I was writing this sentence, I have to tell Enzo to stop chewing on the edge of the coffee table.

                                Enzo is my biggest trouble maker I would say. He is 8 this year, so have slowen down some. One of my favorite memory of him is finding him passed out in the pantry covering in cat nip and head in the bag food. We have no idea how he got in there, but he managed to dump the huge container of cat nip all over himself. He will let you know if he is hungry and you ignore him he proceeds to annoy the crap out of you until you feed him. He will lick the empty metal feed bowl just to make sure you know its empty. He wakes me up by chewing on anything plastic. He knows it annoys the crap out of me. He will does anything he wants and doesn't care if he is not suppose to such as laying on the counter, laying on the kitchen table, and teaching all the other cats to do the same. I have given up years ago with even disciplining him. We tried the whole spray bottle thing, but its to the point you have to spray him in the face multiply times to get him to stop doing what he is doing. He just talks back to you when you tell him no. He somewhat listens to my bf as he has yet to give up the dream of where a cat can and can't be. All real cat people know, cats do as they please, they may appease you when you are around, but the second you leave they do what they want.

                                Enzo's other bad habit is breaking glasses. He also can't resist a good straw and will dump the cup over on purpose. If he is pissed off or feels like it, he will go around a knock glasses ove if they are left out. One time in college, he was mad and I went up stair and every glass empty or not was knocked over including the ones in the sink. He also feels if he would like to lay somewhere it is okay to push everything on the ground that is in that area.

                                But he is so freaking cute! I love him!

                                The worst permanent damage he has done was to use a door jam as a scratching post.

                                I have 2 others that a better behaved. They are girls though. I feel like they get in less trouble. Moon is my baby or so she thinks. She get jealous if I interact with the other cats. Well more so my youngest one. In her mind, I am her human.

                                Remi, my youngest one, I am still getting to know. She is almost a year, so very playful. She likes to "rape" you for your love and affection. She is very respectful of Moon because Moon is "mean" to her, but overall they do get along. My cats were not thrilled with the 3rd addition, but Remi needed an upgrade out of the barn cat situation of a feral cat herd, so I took her as something told me to.
                                I love cats, I love every single cat....
                                So anyway I am a cat lover
                                And I love to run.


                                • #36
                                  Thanks for the introduction and keep the stories coming.... I have a soft spot for VBCs.

                                  My original VBC was a BIG (17 pounds of solid muscle!) rank recently un-tommed dude from the high kill city shelter. He'd been an outdoor cat in the city for all of his four years and was, erm..... street smart. Yeah, that's it. Let's call it street smart.

                                  I'd been working on my SO to get a cat for quite a while when we stopped into the shelter to look at dogs. Of course we ended up in the cat room. Mr. RF homed in on the nastiest feline in the place and said "If we're getting a cat, it has to be like that one." I think he thought selecting such an obviously demon possessed beast would dissuade me. Silly Mr. RF.

                                  In the meet-n-greet room, the cat spent the entire visit- 20+ minutes- walking around growling. Constantly. Continually. He didn't pause for a breath. After I gleefully squealed "We'll TAKE him!" the shelter staff made me put him back in his cage. We named him Horatio Grrr McSnottypaws.

                                  His first night home, Grrr followed me around like a puppy, growling all the while. When I walked into the bedroom, he spied my 120 lb. rottie sleeping peacefully on her bed; he bolted the ten feet between the door and her and slit her open from her eye to the tip of her nose. My poor dear old girl shook her head, gave him a sad "Dude, why can't we all just get along?" grumble, and went back to sleep. You can't really blame him- having spent many years on the tough streets, he probably had to defend himself from aggressive dogs often enough that he simply decided it was safer to take the offensive. Taking the offensive turned out to be an overriding characteristic of his personality.

                                  Like everyone else, I could go on and on about his "charming" antics- from the time he spent 40 minutes chasing a 70 lb. dog through all three floors of our house before we could corner and contain him, to the time he merrily dragged his latest kill out to show us- my brand spanking new left dress boot, complete with boot bag (right boot removed and unmaimed). He methodically dismembered a 6 foot window screen to attempt to eat a bird nesting outside of it; he thought nothing was funnier then opening the trash drawer during the day and watching the dog get scolded for destroying the trash in the evening.

                                  And above and beyond all that, once he figured out that the nice warm house, strangely tolerant people and other creatures were all HIS foreverandeverandever, he turned out to be the best.cat.ever. Extremely loyal, intelligent and in his own way very, very loving. We lost him to FeLeuk in November 09. It took the other cats THREE MONTHS to decide it was OK to sleep in his bed & to go into our bedroom which had been his exclusive domain. We all miss him.

                                  Grrr in all his Grrrness.....

                                  Just so you know, everything is mine.

                                  No really, it's all mine.

                                  This window? Mine.

                                  Seriously. Mine.

                                  Steve, I TOLD you this is MINE.

                                  What are you laughing at fatty?

                                  People, I know where you sleep at night.
                                  bar.ka think u al.l. susp.ect
                                  free bar.ka and tidy rabbit


                                  • #37
                                    Love all the stories! Sorry to hear of your loss Rubyfree. I lost my best.friend.ever to feline luek as well. We thought he didn't get it. He was 6 before it started showing symptoms. We lost him by 7. Horrible Horrible Disease. We didn't know and I had rescued another cat. Sadly, she contracted it as well. I put her down at first signs practically. I put my best friend on all the meds, tried and tried and tried. The disease is just way too tragic. Couldn't ever put another animal through it
                                    "Never let the fear of striking out, keep you from playing the game."


                                    • #38
                                      O I forgot to include my cat's art!



                                      Enzo carries my shoes around the apartment and they are never where I left them. He once carried my paddock boot upstairs!
                                      I love cats, I love every single cat....
                                      So anyway I am a cat lover
                                      And I love to run.


                                      • #39

                                        This is Button the terminator kitteh. She greeted me at the door with her gift. It was still alive but I managed to prevent her from dashing into the house with her animated toy that would have provided many hours of fun for her and many hours of anxiety for me.
                                        Click image for larger version

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                                        Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.


                                        • #40
                                          I swear, Puck and Sharkbait are long lost brothers. Sharkbait eats cardboard, plastic, and has destroyed every Nerf dart my kids own. Sometimes he bites the kids, and attacks the German Shepherd. Our 10 pound Corgi is a big chew toy for Sharkbait. Attached are a few pictures of him behaving. I will have to dig out some of the "bad" ones.

                                          Looking cute:

                                          Stole the German Shepherd's Bone:

                                          New (Live) Chew Toy:

                                          Cage Match:


                                          Hand over the stocking little girl and no one gets hurt!

                                          About to attack from above!

                                          And finally...Sharkbait's new favorite chew toy....My son's books!
                                          Last edited by Jamie2337; Apr. 20, 2011, 02:07 PM.
                                          "I'm an idealist. I don't know where I'm going, but I'm on my way."