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Breeders Remorse

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  • Breeders Remorse

    I love breeding. I love foals.

    But I can't bring myself to sell them.

    I can't go on like this! I tear up every time I try to write an ad for Dreamhorse.

    How many will I have to breed before I get over the desire to keep them all? Assuming I don't get divorced or go bankrupt first.
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  • #2
    hahahah you sound like ME!! I love them all and I really really really don't want to sell a single soul. . . . booo. . do I have to????
    Willow Run Connemaras
    Home of: "Willow Boy" (*Chiltern Colm ex *Sillbridge Miranda by Thunderbolt)
    ~Irish Connemara Ponies for Sport and Pleasure~


    • #3
      I hear you.

      I can think of a legitimate reason to keep Every. Single. One.

      My husband wants to wring my neck!

      But I LOVE them -- they truly delight me. They are the results of years of hard work and planning and they meet my goals. They are what I WANTED to produce -- so why in the world would I not want to keep them?

      I find that part of the breeding game to be the hardest part. I really adore my foals..... but on the flip side, it is exciting to see babies go off to homes that have big plans for them, in regions where we don't have access to the same sorts of show venues, etc. But still..... it's hard. It's just hard.....
      Family Partners Welsh Ponies - Home of Section B Welsh stallion *Wedderlie Mardi Gras LOM/AOE http://www.welshponies.com
      Click here to buy: A Guide To In Hand Showing of Your Welsh Pony


      • #4
        Me too! It breaks my heart to sell them. In answer to your question, OP, I don't know but I haven't gotten there yet. The foals I am producing now are what I dreamed of producing, and to part with them is agony!

        RIP "Rio" (BW-Clarion) 2000-2009. Bright Spirit, Brave Heart, Loving Soul. I'll love and miss you forever.


        • #5
          I keep way too many more than I should! It is hard to sell the nicest ones too. I'm with Clarion...when you produce exactly what you dreamed off, selling them is agony!


          • #6
            I love my babies :-)

            Just think of yourself as a custodian. You are not their owner, only the one that brings them up (the right way) so that their owners will be so very happy with them when they come along! When each foal is born, I make it clear to myself that I am just their caretaker, and I am going to do my best to make them as sweet and user friendly as possible. No complaints from clients so far (15 + years,) just my aching heart, hoping I hear back from the happy new family :-) I love to hear from anyone that has ended up with one of my homebreds. It makes the entire process livable!




            • #7
              I am the same way and I finally got hubby to agree to let me keep one for myself. I've sold 3 and I miss them all. But I did get to go visit one who is now a 3 year old and the one that I sold most recently went to really lovely people who give me regular updates and really seem to love him just as much as I do! So that helps. The two youngsters I have now are out of my own mares and by my own stallion and that makes it even harder.


              • #8
                I can relate so well! We're selling all of our breeding stock and I am heartsick. I love the mares and I love their babies.... I feel a great sense of accomplishment when I look at the foals and know I chose those parents and now here is this wonderful athlete! I did a good job! The one thing I have some control over is who gets to own them after me. They have to go to an "A" show home... that makes me feel better. I know, if all goes well and they stay sound, I should be seeing them in the ring someday. There's always a bright side!
                CAMPESINO (1990 - 2008)
                Capitol I - Sacramento Song xx


                • #9
                  I love picking the stallion and raising the babies too. I have never even attempted to sell one yet. (I get offers but...) I love them all! Thank goodness, I don't have a big herd. I'm sorry, but they are not going anywhere. They are family to me. I have often pictured a "For Sale" sign around my naughty filly's neck (now a yearling), but when it comes right down to it, there's no way. She is a huge source of entertainment and ever so sweet. And now I have this 6 week old colt.... :-))

                  I totally feel for you.
                  Dark Horse Farm


                  • #10
                    Well, here is my trick! I knew before going into breeding that I'd never sell a dag-gone one of them. I *KNOW* myself too well. I also knew I'd have to breed a horse at some point because I got this horsey thing BAD... so in 2003 I welcomed into the world my dearest baby, Frodo. I kept him. I bred him to keep him. I have not bred since. I can't breed because I can't sell! I CAN'T! I have never gotten rid of or sold ANY animal I have ever had! EVER! If I ever breed again, it will be for keeps! That is the ONLY way I can do it and not end up with 1000's of horses. Can you saaayyyyy... SUCKER????
                    ~Amy~ TrakehNERD clique
                    *Bugs 5/86-3/10 OTTB Mare* RIP lovely Lady, I miss you
                    *Frodo '03 Anglo Trakehner Gelding*
                    My Facebook


                    • #11
                      I breed between 2 to 4 foals every year and if I couldn't sell them I'd be drowning in horses by now! The way I look at it is that the new owner will ALWAYS be able to give the youngster more attention than I can since I own between 10 to 15 horses at any given time.

                      So that's my excuse and I'm sticking with it! :-)
                      Siegi Belz
                      2007 KWPN-NA Breeder of the Year
                      Dutch Warmbloods Made in the U. S. A.


                      • Original Poster

                        So what you are advising me to do, Seigi, is breed more?


                        Now to explain that to my husband....
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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Molly Malone View Post
                          So what you are advising me to do, Seigi, is breed more?


                          Now to explain that to my husband....
                          Like us on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/edgewoodmeadowfarm


                          • #14
                            I agree it is hard. The first baby I sold...I cried like a big BIG baby. I was so embarassed but just couldn't help myself. It did help knowing that I had sold him to a good home and because I personally delivered him on Christmas Eve I was able to see the farm and facilities where he would live as well as the condition of their other horses. He was a Christmas present for a daughter of a very horsey family and she was ready to raise her own youngster. They were very loving and tickled beyond belief. All these things helped me tremendously.

                            I have it pretty well figured out which foals I will want to keep as breeding stock before they hit the ground. The other's I always think of as being someone else's horse that I am just taking care of for the time being. It makes it much easier to advertise and part with them when I have consistently kept this outlook. I even talk about them like "Filly's new owner is going to love her athleticism." And when I have my act together I will promptly list them for sale, like within a week of birth, just to help me maintain the right mindset.

                            Good luck and hope it becomes easier for you if you decide to continue with breeding.
                            Altamont Sport Horses
                            Trakehners * Knabstruppers * Appaloosa Sport Horses
                            Home of stallions: Ambrosius af Asgard "Atlantis" & Hollywood Hot Spot
                            Birmingham, AL


                            • #15
                              Selling the boys has never been a problem for me to get my head around. The hard part is when I count up the mares I own and realize that I have fillies that I had hoped to keep, but that really will need to go in order to keep my mare herd from being absolutely enormous. That is really tough.

                              But, when I find super people for the young ones who send reports and pics often, I am one happy, happy breeder.
                              Mary Lou


                              Member OMGiH I loff my mares clique


                              • #16
                                Originally posted by siegi b. View Post
                                I breed between 2 to 4 foals every year and if I couldn't sell them I'd be drowning in horses by now! The way I look at it is that the new owner will ALWAYS be able to give the youngster more attention than I can since I own between 10 to 15 horses at any given time.

                                So that's my excuse and I'm sticking with it! :-)

                                Yeah, that is how I look at it too. And every darn year, there is at least one I wanna keep. OUCH. Why can't we all just win the lottery and stay home and collect horses

                                I will say, when a youngster goes to a REALLY good home, I am happy. I guess it is kind of like letting the kids out of the nest - when your child gets a great job and goes off to the big city, it is painful, but exciting.
                                www.MysticOakRanch.com Friesian/Warmblood Crosses, the Ultimate Sporthorse
                                Director, WTF Registry


                                • #17
                                  My first three were fillies and so I have the excuse that I now have a good broodmare herd!! Of course the next one goes irregardless. Then my friends all say what if it is a black filly?! GEESH
                                  The rider casts his heart over the fence,
                                  the horse jumps in pursuit of it.

                                  –Hans-Heinrich Isenbart


                                  • #18
                                    I hear ya. The one I bred in '05 is a keeper for life. We had two this year, one we bred and the other we got the mare in foal. We had convinced ourselves the one we didn't breed would be for sale (the other is a keeper). Then she was born, and she has such a great head on her, is built so well (far beyond what I was expecting from an unknown paint/TB cross)...we dabbled with the idea, I put an ad on dreamhorse priced WAY high which has expired and we decided to keep her until she is old enough to start and then sell. She is our only one "for sale" although not listed and frankly I'd be hard pressed. Any others the plan is to actively market but we still want to keep them until they are old enough to start and sell under saddle. I'm just paranoid about selling a foal, the buyer really needs to have the experience to deal with one and I've found all the interest we have had in our paint were people I just couldn't bring myself to sell her to.
                                    Celtic Pride Farm
                                    Become a fan on Facebook!


                                    • #19
                                      I'm actually having the opposite problem. I sold a horse a few months ago, and when I asked my trainer this past weekend how he was doing....she told me that the trainer who purchased him as a resale prospect didn't like riding him, so he had sent him back to his girlfriend (also a trainer) in another state.


                                      He didn't like my baby? He's a gangly 5 year old (looks 3) who needs more time to be a solid citizen. And I guess he didn't want to spend the time.

                                      So I'm a little disappointed and wondering what's going to happen to the little guy.
                                      * Sunny * Ella (2006 filly) * Tank (2008 colt)*


                                      • #20
                                        It is hard. But, selling a foal you bred and raised is also one of the most rewarding things you can do. Seeing the joy they bring their new owner. Getting the emails, letters and pictures from them showing how much joy they bring to someone else. Picking that perfect person to help them develop their talent. I know one of my friends is estatic anytime one of her "babies" is shown and wins. Even if they place higher than the one she is showing (or having shown as the case may be). Some of them are 3-4-5 generations away from her breeding program now, but she keeps track of them all, and cheers for them all. Nothing better than selling that horse to a first time owner and making dreams come true. Or having your horse picked as a personal choice of a BNR to take him to the top. Or having your filly picked as the beginning of someone else's breeding program (and trust me, when she has her first foal.. you still feel all the joy you would if you owned her still..).

                                        See selling them isn't about losing them. You still get to experience the joy in their accomplishments, sadness in the defeats. It's about helping the horse live up to his potential, weather it's with you or someone else. They are never really gone from you, just temporarily reassigned
                                        "Sadly, some people's greatest skill, is being an idiot". (facebook profile pic I saw).