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Being Told about "New" Horsey Things by the Non-Horsey

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  • Being Told about "New" Horsey Things by the Non-Horsey

    Heard from a relative last week:

    Relative, quite enthusiastic: "I was just talking to a new coworker who has horses, and did you know she VACUUMS them? She said it's easier than grooming. She even has a special vacuum, not just her house vacuum. It even has a curry brush attachment. I just had to tell you that they're making vacuums for horses now and even brushes to go on them."

    Me: "They have been for years, and yes, they have special horse vacuums."

    Relative: "But if they've been around, why don't you have one already?"

    Me: "I don't have my real barn yet and have no electricity at the grooming station." (My grooming station, which she has seen, is simply a tie spot outside. Clearly not an outlet anywhere close.)

    Relative: "Oh."


  • #2
    My dad: "Did you know that nowadays people are filing their horses teeth down? And why on earth would they do that? It's probably just a scam for vets to make money."

    Me: "It's called 'floating' their teeth, Dad, and people have done it for years. It's because horses' teeth continuously grow and often develop irregular wear. Floating evens them out to assist in CHEWING so they can utilize their feed better."

    I love my dad. I really do.

    Comment


    • #3
      Dad (after my taking riding lessons for years): Oh, now I see why you've been taking riding lessons for so long. You've gotten better.

      Me: Thanks dad.

      Or:

      Neighbor: Why do you need to take lessons? Riding is just moving right?

      Me: Yes, just like skiing. It's just moving. Forward. Downhill. Fast. You took skiing lessons, right?
      Laurie Higgins
      www.coreconnexxions.com
      ________________
      "Expectation is premeditated disappointment."

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by Twiliath View Post

        Neighbor: Why do you need to take lessons? Riding is just moving right?

        Me: Yes, just like skiing. It's just moving. Forward. Downhill. Fast. You took skiing lessons, right?
        My favorite is being asked why i need to KEEP taking lessons. Well, cause i want to KEEP the horse between me and the ground, that's why!
        Forward momentum!

        Comment


        • #5
          The constant lesson thing is hard to explain. "I thought you knew how to ride."

          "Yeah. But I want to ride BETTER!"
          ==================
          Somehow my inner ten year old seems to have stolen my chequebook!

          http://reriderandpony.blogspot.com/

          Comment


          • #6
            My Grandmother asked over the weekend "why does your horse still need training... she's 8???????????????"

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by dressagetraks View Post
              Heard from a relative last week:

              Relative, quite enthusiastic: "I was just talking to a new coworker who has horses, and did you know she VACUUMS them? She said it's easier than grooming. She even has a special vacuum, not just her house vacuum. It even has a curry brush attachment. I just had to tell you that they're making vacuums for horses now and even brushes to go on them."

              Me: "They have been for years, and yes, they have special horse vacuums."

              Relative: "But if they've been around, why don't you have one already?"

              Me: "I don't have my real barn yet and have no electricity at the grooming station." (My grooming station, which she has seen, is simply a tie spot outside. Clearly not an outlet anywhere close.)

              Relative: "Oh."

              You missed a grand opportunity for a big present down the road:

              "Yes, I know, they are awesome, I would love to have one once I got power at my grooming stall!"



              Shockingly, I don't converse with too many non-horsey folks...
              Originally posted by BigMama1
              Facts don't have versions. If they do, they are opinions
              GNU Terry Prachett

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by Chaila View Post
                The constant lesson thing is hard to explain. "I thought you knew how to ride."

                "Yeah. But I want to ride BETTER!"
                "But I thought you were better". Mom, my last lesson was 20+ years ago so between then and now, I probably forgot a few things.
                Yogurt - If you're so cultured, how come I never see you at the opera? Steven Colbert

                Comment


                • #9
                  I have two:

                  I was out of work for a few days because I was thrown by my horse and tore my rotar cuff.

                  Co-Worker-Did you really come off your horse? I thought you were supposed to be a good rider.


                  2nd thing:

                  Co-worker- My Husband says if a horse lays down it cannot get back up because it's body is too heavy for it's legs.

                  Me- No, Horse are able to lay down and will even snooze for long periods of time. Mine do it all the time.

                  Co-Worker- I do not know about that, I will have to ask my husband

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    On the vacuum thing: From my MIL visiting from out west where men are men and horses are forms of transportation, as she watched me vacuum my horse.

                    "WE dont' spoil our horses. WE let 'em get good and dirty. It's better for them!"

                    Yeah, nothing like a big case of rainrot to improve a horse's health & wellbeing.

                    Also thinks I'm a wussy for wearing a hard hat. I put it on and she squealed:
                    Tally HO!!

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by spotnnotfarm View Post
                      Did you really come off your horse? I thought you were supposed to be a good rider.
                      I HATE this. It's so... condescending, in a way. Or clueless. Just like the people who think riding is easy because "the horse does all the work. You just have to sit there and steer."
                      Different flavors of crazy, but totally NUTS. You know its true. - GreyHunterHorse

                      http://showertimecontemplations.blogspot.com/

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by spotnnotfarm View Post

                        Co-Worker-Did you really come off your horse? I thought you were supposed to be a good rider.
                        Ugh. That IS annoying! As if gymnasts never miss the beam, tennis players return every serve, golfers sink every putt, pro quarterbacks have a 100% completion rate, and every MLB player has a 1.00 batting average.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Haha, these are all typical.

                          "The horse does all the work, how is that a sport?" Um, how about you come down to the barn with me sometime and you can tell me how your body feels for the next three days after you ride...

                          "Oh, I don't need lessons, I already know how to ride." I got this a LOT when I was working at a public facility in a public park... I always tried to encourage them by saying, well, I've been riding for xx years, and I know I'll still be learning until the day I die. They say, "Oh no, not me. I already know all about riding." In the course of this conversation, they'd usually say at least 10 things that showed they likely couldn't tell which end gets treats and which end makes treats...

                          I love the comment about horses not laying down becaues their body is too heavy for their legs to support! Um, how do they walk around all day then? You'd think if their body was that heavy, they'd have to lay down... A lot of newbies also don't realize that horses do actually lay down to nap sometimes - they usually come running "oh noooo! Dobbin is colicking!" I freak out and then realize they're just taking a snooze, haha.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Dad: Why do horses need their teeth floated, they don't do that in the wild!

                            me: No dad but they have practically bred everything natural our of my TB, and in the wild they eat ALL DAY, wether it be grass, minerals, clay whatever, they don't stand in a 12x24 pen with nothing to chew on.

                            or,
                            dad: why does your horse need special shoeing (navicular) they do just fine in the wild.

                            me: no they don't dad, they go very lame and DIE!
                            lol

                            Love my dad, he just doesn't understand horses.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Bless my Grandmother's heart, but she asks my mom quite often how come I haven't learned how to ride yet (I've been taking lessons for my entire life).

                              When I got my second horse my dad said "good, now I can go riding with you."

                              Horse 1: Pretty much a trainer only horse with bad manners, no work ethic, and too smart for his own good, and also lame.
                              Horse 2: Needed re-starting, abused, and known for bucking everyone off.

                              "No Dad, you can't go riding with me since I don't have a horse you can ride."

                              "What about horse 2?"

                              My dad is an engineer, designs software, and has worked on rocket science projects, yet somehow this was out of his mental grasp...

                              Comment


                              • #16
                                Originally posted by Sansena View Post
                                "WE dont' spoil our horses. WE let 'em get good and dirty. It's better for them!"
                                My horses think they are being spoiled whenever I DO let them get good and dirty
                                Auventera Two:Some women would eat their own offspring if they had some dipping sauce.
                                Serious Leigh: it sounds like her drama llama should be an old schoolmaster by now.

                                Comment


                                • #17
                                  Dad...so, do you make any money off those horses you have?
                                  Me-yes Dad, I give lessons on them, and make alot! (a big fat lie just to shut him up).
                                  Overheard in the tack store, another customer reading my flier on equine massage therapy (read in hick voice)
                                  EQUINE MASSAGE?? are you kidding me?? I don't pay for my 'whife' to get a massage, I'm surly not gonna pay for my horse to get one! duh huh
                                  Equine Massage Therapy Classes and Rehab for Horses
                                  http://www.midwestnha.wordpress.com[/INDENT]

                                  Comment


                                  • #18
                                    The mom and I are talking about a very fancy but nuts horse a friend wants to give me. I might be able to fix him. I already own the best pet of a horse ever who is not fancy.

                                    She rode a tad as a kid and thought that you could have fancy or good-minded, but not both. She was genuinely surprised when I told her "Of course good athletes come with good minds sometimes. It just that they cost more than your house."

                                    She really had no clue.
                                    The armchair saddler
                                    Politically Pro-Cat

                                    Comment


                                    • #19
                                      The mom and I are talking about a very fancy but nuts horse a friend wants to give me. I might be able to fix him. I already own the best pet of a horse ever who is not fancy.

                                      She rode a tad as a kid and thought that you could have fancy or good-minded, but not both. She was genuinely surprised when I told her "Of course good athletes come with good minds sometimes. It's just that they cost more than your house."

                                      She really had no clue.
                                      The armchair saddler
                                      Politically Pro-Cat

                                      Comment


                                      • #20
                                        On the lesson thing, my 69 year old mother in law, who constantly play golf, complains about her game and signs up for and takes lots of lessons, continues to ask me why I keep taking riding lessons.... duh, look in the mirror.
                                        RIP Mydan Mydandy+
                                        RIP Barichello

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