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Dear Know-it-all!

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  • #61
    OMG Tackpud, GET OUT OF THERE NOW!! You should not have to put up with that. You are the customer, and we all know the customer is always right! Forget about giving notice. Obviously they have violated your agreement so it is void.

    And by the way, what supplements are your beasties currently getting? My beasties tell me I'm a feeding expert - and I'd be happy to help you work out a new feeding plan when you move

    Have you had your trailer serviced? It better be ready to get you out of that barn quickly. I can't say enough about towing with the Miata. What do you pull with? I sure hope you don't have to go get your horses in the middle of the night.... If you do be sure to take a gun.
    Y'all ain't right!

    Comment


    • #62
      I thought the new designation is ADHD...and it's obviously an acronym for Absolutely Devoid of Humor Disorder, right? If not, I appologize for the offense I have just committed because it's a bad thing to cause offense...but what fense is the best type anyway? Does anyone know?
      Inner Bay Equestrian
      Facebook
      KERx

      Comment


      • #63
        Oh, it's okay if you cause afence. Most everyone respects afence!

        I'm not offended by the ADD being a handicap stuff. I have a kid with ADHD who is on drugs. I am offended by your suggestion that my daughter does not have a sense of humor! She's a laugh a minute - takes after her mom don'tcha know?!
        Y'all ain't right!

        Comment


        • #64
          I just want to know if everyone opened the "Karaoke fior the deaf" link I posted on the first page. It truly is funny, and gets funnier the more I watch it...

          Comment


          • #65
            <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by M. O'Connor:
            ...but what fense is the best type anyway? Does anyone know? </div></BLOCKQUOTE>


            ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

            Bob Wire.

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            • #66
              Well since ive been away and so busy because i have a lfe unlike some people i will give you the benefit of the few scant seconds i have available to me you know seconds are counted on watches on which i am also an expurt but as im so busy ill stick to the question at hand not the watch hand the issue o horses with or without the wuns,
              if a horse has not got the wuns he will not do well at grand pri(the new IN spelling)even in america where the judges are ignorant peasants and the imported horses are dyed gypsy vanners except for mine who i got from a close friend i made yesterday.
              im so busy i dont think ill be around much so i wont be reaing anything you say so anything you say is ergo.;'pointless
              (but ill be back in a sec)

              Comment


              • #67
                well thankyou very much wallowsend people like you make me flounce off back to torment the people at the barn because you are not worth my time.
                unless you are prepared to suck it up whilst riding 8 days a week OUTSIDE the paper bag if you know what that even is and can map your horses family tree back to when he was a small dog like creature and can keep him alive for ever prior to giv ing him a full viking burial "YOU HAVE NO BUSINESS OWNING A HORSE"
                but as i said,i have nothing further to say to you
                this message has been edited 17 times

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                • #68
                  Dear Know-it-all,
                  Please Help! I am sneaking out of the barn I currently board at and I am not sure where to go (I plan to do this in the middle of the night so the BO is not aware and does not try to get the money I owe to her). Can someone take me in for a short time - I have "NeVeR" done this to anyone before. I am not sure why there is never any hay, grain or shavings at this place. I would talk to the BO about paying her bills - but I am the BO and my mare is about to foal. I am not sure who the stud is but I think it is my husband because he offered to help in the barn about 8 weeks ago (like I believe he would help)... so I hope the litter is at least 5 so I can sell them off and board at a nicer facility. Please help me and send me some information on boarding at your place, your husbands character and where I can unload a litter of foaluppies. Oh and while I am on the subject... I require top quality care and can only afford $10 a month per horse. Did I mention I have 6 other geldings - maybe stallions and one of them is also about to have foaluppies too... Help

                  Comment


                  • #69
                    well im not dear knowitall but i know how dearie loves it when a new poster jumps in to answer first and ends up in the 100000000000 posts club....so
                    Make sure you rub those things bottoms with warm towels till they are pooping and peeing just at the sight of you.

                    Comment


                    • #70
                      Gee for only having 28 posts under yer belt ya have a purty good understanding of this BB.


                      <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by Devistated100X:
                      Dear Know-it-all,
                      Please Help! I am sneaking out of the barn I currently board at and I am not sure where to go (I plan to do this in the middle of the night so the BO is not aware and does not try to get the money I owe to her). Can someone take me in for a short time - I have "NeVeR" done this to anyone before. I am not sure why there is never any hay, grain or shavings at this place. I would talk to the BO about paying her bills - but I am the BO and my mare is about to foal. I am not sure who the stud is but I think it is my husband because he offered to help in the barn about 8 weeks ago (like I believe he would help)... so I hope the litter is at least 5 so I can sell them off and board at a nicer facility. Please help me and send me some information on boarding at your place, your husbands character and where I can unload a litter of foaluppies. Oh and while I am on the subject... I require top quality care and can only afford $10 a month per horse. Did I mention I have 6 other geldings - maybe stallions and one of them is also about to have foaluppies too... Help </div></BLOCKQUOTE>

                      Comment


                      • #71
                        Don't you want an autograph from someone with a few more posts listed? It's common knowledge that the more posts you have, the better (or is that more?) advice you give....

                        Everybody knows that Grand Prix (should that be changed to Grand Pri?) is better than Training! Then there are those of us who pay to be rated 'Premium'.
                        Y'all ain't right!

                        Comment

                        • Original Poster

                          #72
                          Dear All,

                          Well M. O'Connor, I will have to go with Sabina and say that Bob Wire is definately the best type of fense.

                          jetsmom, I did open the karaoke for the deaf link for my stallion but he didn't get much humor out of it. Could that be because he's blind?

                          willowsend, the OTTB's for eight year olds is the oldest trick in the book for the trophy wives. It's kind of like Munchhausen's Syndrome by Proxy. What better way to show the world how much you adore your child than by sitting at his/her bedside whilst they are in a coma. (As long as said coma doesn't coincide with HITS).?

                          As for getting Raff's autograph, I'm sure if you asked nicely, you could get a million of them. Ebay prices vary but, being a live animal, I don't think it's posting would be allowed.

                          Raff, I would hope you plan on inviting the world to said Viking burial. Complete with a monument in the shape of a viking ship.

                          And Raff, the rubbing of bottoms sounds to have excited you a little too quickly. You may try a cold shower now.

                          Well gee Devistated100X, what a connundrum! I would definately have a talk with the BO. I'm afraid at $10/mo/horse, you are far above my standard of care. You are looking for a top class hunter barn for sure where you can have a BNT make you BLT's in the PM. My husband, I'm afraid, also wouldn't meet your standards. He has yet to produce a single foaluppy to date. His motility must be slow but if you try fresh frozen, it may be better. My best advice now would be to open all the gates at this current facility and let your horses find new homes of their own. After all, they always know what's best for them!

                          K-I-A

                          Comment


                          • #73
                            Oh wallowsend, I am afraid to name names on this public forum, but if you PM me I will tell all, even though I have no idea who you are. I mean, for all I know you are an alter sent to infiltrate the ranks of the malcontent

                            I once had a horse we called "The Marquis de Sod". He may have known some of your trainers as he was fairly abusive nasty screamer - and we all know horses don't act that way without years of training.
                            Y'all ain't right!

                            Comment


                            • #74
                              Dear Know It All,
                              Thank you so much for your reply...i just Knew that my mare was proud cut but was afraid to say somthing because my self absorbed vet didn't believe me!!!
                              Imagine being told that mares don't get cut! I'm positive it's a conspiracy between the vet and the BO because for some reason they don't like me.

                              It's so great to be on this board, you people are so helpful and obviosuly very important and busy like Raff...

                              Also...I've beenthinking of buying a horse for my 3 yrs old grandson. Do you think a stallion would be appropriate? He's so beautiful! About 15.5 hands and sabino...

                              Comment


                              • #75
                                Thank you willowsend! That's exactly what I was thinking!
                                What a wonderful boy you must have being so friendly with your sister in law! I hope the one I'm getting for my grand kid will be just as nice!

                                Comment


                                • #76
                                  Dear Know-It-All,
                                  Perhaps you could help me with several horse related questions?

                                  1. I need to retire my old horse(well, he's not really old, only 10, but he looks a good decade older) that I used to jump against my vet's suggestion. He is missing an eye, has navicular which requires $500 corrective shoes, needs weekly vitamin B shots to have the strength to walk to the feed bucket(well, I don't do that, but I think his next owner should) and sometimes likes to bite and kick(he always feels good enough for that). I really, really love this horse, but now that he is old and used up, he is a real drag to have around. Because I love him so much, I can't stand the idea of selling him directly to the feedlot, but keeping him would mean that I would either have to tone down my Jaguar payments and stop buying Coach bags or not get a newer, better horse. Neither one of those is an option, so I was hoping you could tell me what kind of person I could look for who might agree to take him and pay for all his care for the rest of his life (or sell him to the feedlot a month later--as long as I can pretend I don't know).

                                  2. Since my old horse is "all stove up," I am in the market for a new one. Could you tell me where I could get a 17 hand black stallion for $500 or maybe even free? My trainer says I need a packer, but she doesn't understand that I have been watching a lot of Pat Parelli videos and I am a much better rider than she realizes. Since I am sure that I will someday be on the USET team, I really need a horse with a lot of talent and presence so everyone realizes my skill. Can you suggest something that might work for me? Maybe I should buy a foal so I can raise him right?

                                  3. I recently stopped at a small private barn and talked to the owner about boarding (after I got the owner to stop wasting my time and get out of the shower to answer the door--I rang that doorbell for HOURS--I don't have time for that! How rude!!). I am not sure how, but I suspect I offended her. I explained to her that it really would be in her best interest for me to board there, since no one could possible take a backyard owner without a boarder seriously and it would provide her with a LOT of extra money. I told her that I know what it costs to keep a horse, and for $100 a month, I would be providing her with quite a big "tip," so she would be stupid to refuse. She didn't say anything (I think something was wrong with her jaw, since her mouth hung open for the longest time--icky! I don't know if I am comfortable now that I know she is deformed--what if she fell on my horse when her mouth was like that?? She might end up biting him!!). Since I thought her silence was pretty rude after I did her the favor of providing her with a way to make loads of extra cash, I pointed out that she would need to do a few things first to earn some of that extra money, like put in a bathroom for me(I don't want to have to share hers--what if that mouth thing is catching?!?). That's when she ran to the hall closet and I heard what sounded like a shotgun racking. I left because obviously she was crazy in addition to being deformed, and I am sure that I didn't do anything wrong, but I hoped you could offer some tips for finding a barn run by someone normal and properly grateful.
                                  "If you make people think they're thinking, they'll love you; but if you really make them think, they'll hate you." -Don Marquis
                                  **CEO of the TQ "Learn How To Ride or MOVE OVER!!" Clique**

                                  Comment

                                  • Original Poster

                                    #77
                                    Dear mzpeepers,

                                    I believe that letting a child and their horse grow up together is a wonderful bonding experience. I so hope that the stallion you are looking at is a youngster. He should be no more than a yearling in my opinion but considering he's 15.5 hands now, you may have to think about replacing himwithin the next few years when your grandson outgrows him. You can easily tell when this event occurs as your grandson's legs will start to actually hang down instead of pointing straight out to the side. When this happens it's time to look int buying a drafty for him. In the mean time, may I suggest the name Splash for the sabino stallion? You will never hear another horse by that name!

                                    willowsend, please make sure that you find a BNT to teach your stallion ground manners but first, have your animal communicator ask your horse which BNT he prefers. Try to find one that teaches horses to dance. This way, your step daughter will have a horse and prom date all wrapped into one. This will come in handy considering the possible impending facial disfigurements she may suffer during a rowdy game of take the carrot from my mouth.

                                    K-I-A

                                    Comment


                                    • #78
                                      Dear Know It All,
                                      Thank you so much for your reply.
                                      Th sabino stallion might not work ouy as he is 2 yrs old...too old...you're sooo right!
                                      I think I'll Pm willowsend and ask her wher sh found her stallion. He sounds so friendly! May be he has a brother...
                                      Also, perhaps BeastieSlave has some suggestions, being that she had a Marquis De Sod horse. don't know if it was a stallion though...so that might now work either.
                                      I'm confused...so much information...oh...one more thing...do you think that 350.00 is too high a price for a sabino 15.5 2 yrs old stallion? I know thay are asking a lot more but I think that, once th sellers find out what a wonderful home I'm going to provide, they'll see my point and lower the price.

                                      Comment

                                      • Original Poster

                                        #79
                                        Dear 3fatponies,

                                        Let's see if we can answer your questions.

                                        1. I can only suggest that you LIE like a rug! That is the only way you can get out from under this burden. I mean, what does he expect? You fed and watered hiom while using him up right? Now he owes you! Advertise him for a minimum of $20k and I bet he will sell tomorrow!

                                        2. I know just the place for you to find your new horse. Two places actually! First you might check with CANTER. I'm sure they have that 17hh black stallion in your price range. Of course, you may have that initial outlay of money to pin his front legs back together but he should be able to jump 3 ft within the year.

                                        The second place you might try is the BLM wild horse adoptions. You might as well put all those hours of Pat Parelli training to use and show your trainer that she doesn't know anything about horses like you have been telling her since you jumped her schoolmaster over your Jaguar without a helmet that time with NO lasting effects! You told her so!

                                        3. This barn sounds like THE perfect place for you and your new horse! I would go back, with a shotgun of my own since the BO seems to like firearms, and force her to take your deposit. Then just hand her your blueprints for the indoor arena and therapy pool that you want installed this month. She should come around quickly. And, no worries, the jaw thing isn't contagious...until you open the first month's board invoice that is.

                                        Best,
                                        K-I-A

                                        Comment


                                        • #80
                                          Dear Oh Great Know it all, I had responsed early in this thread, of course I haven't read the rest of it, so if this has already been talked about too bad, Do you think I should charge up the battery in my barbie jeep before taking the 12 horse bumper pull trailer to finals? Early in the week Ken took it for a spin but I think its good to go! Also Mini/mule/gypsy sport horse has a missing leg after I brought him in from the pasture. Do you think our finals is in jeopardy? I think he will be sound enough to jog infront of the judge?
                                          I want to be like Barbie because that bitch has everything!

                                          Comment

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