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Coming to a dressage court near you-White Trash Dressage (UPDATE-YOUR photos needed!)

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  • #181
    Garson Keely.......

    Bra Strap...what's that????
    *************************
    Go, Baby, Go......
    Aefvue Farms Footing Inspector

    Comment

    • #182
      Carson (sp) Keely.......

      Bra Strap...what's that????
      *************************
      Go, Baby, Go......
      Aefvue Farms Footing Inspector

      Comment

      • #183
        Which look would get me the most points?

        A wifebeater with my black bra straps showing?

        Or a wifebeater with my used-to-be-white-but-now-they're--yellow-from-sweat-stains bra straps? The white/yellow bra staps do match the yellow armpit stains on the wifebeater better, but the black looks good with my tiger stripe polos (that I am always sure to wrap a little too loose with that lovely bulge in the middle).

        Also, do you think I am better off showing in my $12 bridle that actually LOOKS like a $12 bridle, or should I go for the more expensive one that I also got for $12 because the buckles don't line up right and my throatlatch is always tweaked and the noseband always crooked?

        Oh, one more question! Will I get extra points for connecting the martingale to my girth with baling twine?

        Watch out, we are READY - TO - WIN.
        http://burpclothsandsaddlepads.blogspot.com/

        Comment

        • Original Poster
          #184
          Originally posted by ~Freedom~:
          Just who would be dumb enough to judge this ?
          Well, duh...the person sitting on the chair/bucket with the piece of paper with the word "judge" on it!

          Stains from sweat and who the hell knows what else and baling twine strongly encouraged.
          Co-founder of White Trash Dressage (WTD)
          http://www.lulu.com/mavw1971
          also available on Amazon.com
          http://www.cafepress.com/wtdressage

          Comment

          • #185
            Duh...yellow sweat pits also match tiger stripes.School in the black,show in the stains...tweaked and crooked....busted keepers a must....
            *************************
            Go, Baby, Go......
            Aefvue Farms Footing Inspector

            Comment

            • #186
              I forgot about the sweat stains matching the tiger wraps. I think I will see if I can get a zebra pad. Or maybe a tie-dye one, actually. And I will make sure that I DON'T fix those broken keepers because it really looks much more appropriate with the ends of my cheekpieces flapping in the wind.
              http://burpclothsandsaddlepads.blogspot.com/

              Comment

              • #187
                I'm gonna draw the line at mixing predator and prey prints..no zebra and tiger for me......tyedye please.....
                *************************
                Go, Baby, Go......
                Aefvue Farms Footing Inspector

                Comment

                • #188
                  Originally posted by Wild Oaks Farm:
                  And I will make sure that I DON'T fix those broken keepers because it really looks much more appropriate with the ends of my cheekpieces flapping in the wind.
                  Personally, I would replace those broken keepers with coloured 'black' tape - red is preferred as it looks tacky and clashes so nicely with animal print accessories. But keep an eye out, I hear they are making some fluorescent colours of pvc tape now...that would clash with everything!!!
                  Founder of the Dyslexic Clique. Dyslexics of the world - UNTIE!!

                  Member: Incredible Invisbles

                  Comment

                  • #189
                    Well, I am now proudlysporting by salmon-puke colored sweatshirt in the ring...the one that proclaims boldly on the back: "Don't like my riding? Call 1-800-F**K YOU!" because with my ripped suede half chaps, and my paddock boots with the heels off, it really makes a nice statement.

                    And I am riding in slathered in duct tape, so thatthe judge knows I won WTD year end awards, and thus am proving myself more deserving of next year's.

                    I am also wearing my banner (like the kind they have in the Miss America contest) that says "2005 WTD Year End Award" so they don't miss it. Sadly, I had to sell my tiara to pay for all of this.
                    www.specialhorses.org
                    a 501(c)3 organization helping 501(c)3 equine rescues

                    Comment

                    • #190
                      Well I hope I still have a chance (even against someone who already has a "name" in the sport). I hate it when I always lose to the same person, even if MY ride was more white trash than theirs.
                      http://burpclothsandsaddlepads.blogspot.com/

                      Comment

                      • #191
                        I can just see myself showing, in my duct-taped boots, halting at X doing the perfect park and pee, and when judge Tanya Harding has the nerve to mark me down, I can say HEY! you don't know me. I do what I want!@!!!!*(%(#@

                        Comment

                        • #192
                          I have a question.
                          Do you get extra points for the sewing machine if your'e wearing a Bustier?
                          I'm thinking sweat stained white, badly shaved armpits, ciggie with a lot of ash hanging off the lip. Bright red lipstick of course.

                          Or is that too classy?
                          ____________________________
                          “Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.”
                          Dave Barry

                          Comment

                          • #193
                            Now Galloway...if I amswered that question...you might beat me. And that I simply cannot allow.

                            But...I think bright red lipstick is okay but only if you have dark purple eye shadow. And very very big hair. Of course, perhaps this is only a midwest thing.
                            www.specialhorses.org
                            a 501(c)3 organization helping 501(c)3 equine rescues

                            Comment

                            • #194
                              Finally...something my horse is truly good at.

                              Do you get extra point for horse randomly loosing its mind while doing a turn-on-the-fore, resulting in warp speed reining spins, then bursting into the tranter, tripping, then moving into the giraffe trot?
                              TK
                              Owner of \"Ollie\" 1997 QH gelding
                              *member of the blonde riders clique*Missed Out On Ponies (MOOP) clique*

                              Comment

                              • #195
                                Silly midwesterners!

                                Purple eyeshadow is only for night classes.
                                I was thinking lime green, up to the eyebrows, with little spangly things in it.
                                Tre trashy!
                                ____________________________
                                “Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.”
                                Dave Barry

                                Comment

                                • #196
                                  I have been researching the history of WTD and my understanding is that in years past, it was required that the judge be saluted with a loud belch at the completion of the test. It's the loss of traditions such as these that threaten the integrity of the sport. My suggestion is to bring it back. Extra points if it's the horse that belches. Double if the horse and rider do it together.

                                  Comment

                                  • #197
                                    the secret to the crooked noseband is the baling twine tie down thats making it crooked the judge should be able to smell you as you go by,nothing says winner as much as the pints of dried sweat from past wtd!Anyone can spraypaint yellow armpits on.Crusty black stuff on a grey gelding =xtra points.

                                    Comment

                                    • #198
                                      I'm intrigued by the notion of point multiplers, as I believe my horse has a special talent for this.

                                      What's a tranter, no wait, a foxtranter, oh hold on, a running giraffe walk--geez, make up your mind and JUST PICK A GAIT--OK, a running giraffe octopus shuffle which ends ABRUPTLY with an eyes bugging out of head DIRTY stop at nothing, feet splayed out like a newborn foal while mommy peels her privates off the pommel and screeches "youdirtysobeffingmothereffer", ESPECIALLY if the screeching lasts more than 5 minutes and causes the judge to pee her pants? That's gotta be worth something, right?

                                      Comment

                                      • #199
                                        I do believe Bruster and I will be quite the fashion trendsetters at the next WTD show. Please stop by and say hi to us, I'll be the one with the 2 sizes too tight wife beater, low rise breaches complete with belly roll AND the back triangle of my thong hangin out, Bruster will be all decked out in his neon tyedye pad (which I forgot we had, thanks Irish Ei's ) and lime green polos...you really won't be able to miss us!
                                        *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

                                        ~ owned & loved by my OTTB Bruster ~

                                        \"You are a great champion. When you ran the ground shook, the sky opened, and mere mortals parted the way to victory\" ~ Dreamer

                                        Comment

                                        • #200
                                          how many points would I earn for a horse that stops on a dime from a gallop, drops his nose to the ground, pops his shoulder, and unloads my a** right on the judge's table? After Bruster's latest display, somthing like this is entirely possible!
                                          *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

                                          ~ owned & loved by my OTTB Bruster ~

                                          \"You are a great champion. When you ran the ground shook, the sky opened, and mere mortals parted the way to victory\" ~ Dreamer

                                          Comment

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