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A Thread About Wonderful Partners and Great Relationships (Human that is)

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  • <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by sandi in florida:
    I'm sorry if I sound bitter to you gals...
    <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

    Actually, you just sound like an alter
    *Faune D'Helby*

    Comment


    • I've been happily married for 21 years to a man that learned to ride because he saw the joy I got from it, who has always been my partner and my very best friend.
      Is our marriage perfect-hell, no.
      Is is the best thing in my life-hell, yes.

      I really feel kind sorry for Sandi, to tell you the truth because she's obviously got such a sad, skewed view of men and relationships.
      I wonder what it takes to make someone that bitter?
      I know that there are men out there that cheat on their wives, just as there are women that cheat on their husbands.
      To assume that every married man was on the prowl would be as dumb as assuming
      that every rider beat and abused their horse.
      It's just not logical.

      Comment


      • Since we're in the "share a photo" mode, here's my big lug with our Percheron, Tank:
        Attached Files
        <>< Sorrow Looks Back. Worry Looks Around. Faith Looks Up! -- Being negative only makes a difficult journey more difficult. You may be given a cactus, but you don't have to sit on it.

        Comment


        • Darn! Wish I could post pics of my guy!

          Sandi- when I was single and gloriously happy in my single state I still did not bash folks that were married. I never intended to marry. As a matter of fact I think I told Dh on our 2nd date that if he was looking for a wife he was in the wrong house. I had my own house, horses, truck, trailer, car and all the bills that went with them. I managed everything just fine and felt no need to have someone make me happy. Well guess what. I did not find someone that made me happy- I found someone I was happy to be with. He does not complete me... I was not half a woman when I met him. But he does enhance my life. He does not really drink beer (well not any more than I do anyway), he does hog the remote but I usually say 'is there anything else on' and he turns it to CSI, he might be out there flirting but I doubt it and no, he was not knocking on your door last night because he has never even been to Florida.

          Comment


          • Ok, not to jump on the bandwagon late, but...I LOVE my SO!!! Pictures will be forthcoming when I can get him to let me take some.

            I don't think anyone on this board is saying that all men are saints, that a lot of men don't cheat on their wives/SO's, and that every woman is happily married.

            Yes, there are real slimebags out there, we have all probably met, dated, or slept with one somewhere along the way, but that doesn't mean that they are all bad...my father got one of my mom's friends (well, apparently not a friend...) pregnant when I was five years old; the so-called friend was married to a schoolteacher and had two children of her own which she walked out on...does that mean all women are bad, and will sleep with their friends' husbands? Um, no...there are some truly crappy human beings on this earth.

            Anyway, keep the happy couple photos coming!
            ******************************
            \"Who is the happier man, he who has braved the storm of life and lived or he who has stayed securely on shore and merely existed?\" RIP Hunter S. Thompson 1937-2005

            Member of the Ebay addicts, warmblood, child of

            Comment


            • Okay, Thought I would add my two cents and story. Sorry if this sappiness hurts anyone.

              I started dating my hubby when we were in high school and we got married 2 1/2 years ago. I had fallen out of horses and didn't get back into them till I graduated from college. At first there were some "issues" with it but basically I told him that they were my future and don't ever ask me to choice b/c he wasn't going to like the answer (luckily I didn't ever have to try and make a real decision).

              So he quickly came around and now has agreed to live on a farm since we have opened a boarding barn, commute about 2 hours one way to work so 4 hours total and muck stalls on weekends for me. He is the most wonderful husband and more importantly my best friend. I couldn't ask for a greater person to be in my life and am humbled everyday what he sacrifices and does just to see me smile. He is a much better person than I and I live every day to try and give back to him what he gives to me.

              Sandi- You are too funny. Your comments make me what to pat you on your head since you clearly don't understand what being married is all about and what all of these women already know. Marriage is about being with your best friend and sharing a life together. You are only looking at the shallow sides of marriage, money, status, etc. Yes some marriages are based on those but those arent the ones that will last forever. But yes men flirt as do women. I used to work in corporate and saw just as many women acting like that as men. It is a fact of life. I guess what I am trying to say is don't flatter yourself. We are all hit on. Even the old married ones. I can say that my husband most definitely was not one of the ones who hit on you. I know b/c I trust him, just like you would trust your best girl friend that she isn't flirting with your guy.

              So any way that is my story and my only secret to success is to find them young and train them early!

              So I guess what
              Grab mane and kick on!

              http://www.ashleykriegeleventing.com/

              Comment


              • <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by PiedPiper:

                So any way that is my story and my only secret to success is to find them young and train them early!
                <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

                So true. My SO and I have been together since we were 16 and 17. My brother and his wife have been together since they were 15 and 16 they are now 25 and 26.

                Comment


                • My boyfriend is a carbon copy (in support aspect) of Midge's

                  I have Mr. Wonderful living at my house. You are all jealous, arent you
                  Tolerant, encouraging and supportive of the heese. He is the reason I am able to do so much with CANTER, and a big part of my daily happiness. (yes i was happy without him too
                  Not a horsey guy before me, but now has two heese he calls his own. Goes riding with me every once in a while, but best of all goes to feed everybody when I just. cannot. face. thebarn.
                  I knew he was the man for me when my hayguy didnt show up several days in row right after my back surgery (i was bedridden) and he put bales of hay into the backseat and truck of his Beamer.
                  I heart him like Xani.
                  Whats not to like? The Train loves him he's a piece of a$$ and he's taking me here tomorrow morning.

                  Comment


                  • This is just the nicest thread - what a wonderful idea. My boyfriend and I have been living together for about three years now, and when we first got together I didn't have my horse yet ... but it didn't take long before I bought Griffin! Now, Ben can take my horse to graze and is incredibly gentle with my 17 year old orange cat (who he calls "the redheaded stepchild"). He is my best friend and I love him to pieces - and he feels the same way about me. I support his art and he supports my love of horses. I can't predict the future, but the present is wonderful, and we have lots of dreams together.

                    Karosel, Sunshine GA, Pocketpony, Chocomare and everyone else who posted photos: it's so nice to see how happy you are!

                    Comment


                    • Fairweather/pantsy: as always, you have great pics of John!

                      Chocomare: I think that's a great pic of your husband and the mare as well!

                      Carry on with the nice thread about the great men in your lives, ladies (and that's from a single gal).

                      And a tip of the hat to Moesha!

                      Comment


                      • Thanks Griff & Flash. I do so love him. He's a true blessing to me.

                        To all you singles who desire to be married, three pieces of sage advice from someone who's lived and learned the hard way:

                        1- If you want a quality person, go to a quality place (i.e., church, synagogue, etc.) ~ When I moved to Georgia, my mom jokingly told me to find the biggest Baptist church and stand outside the men's room. While I didn't exactly stand outside the men's room, I did go to the biggest church near my apartment and got active in the single's group. Two years later, there he was, sitting in the back row of the Bible study room. We started dating six months later and were married in 1995.

                        2- Don't settle for second best. - If it's not 100% right between you, move on. You won't change him/her. You can hope all you want, it won't do any good. Do each other a favor and part company. I only wish I had listened to that piece 17 years ago. But as my wise mother says "Too soon old, too late smart."

                        3- Don't Marry the One You Can Live With, Marry the One You Can't Live Without - Nuff said.

                        Lastly, memorize and repeat the Single's Creed (it kept me going during my single-wanting-to-be-married years):

                        I Would Rather Go Through Life Wanting What I Don't Have, Than Having What I Don't Want.
                        <>< Sorrow Looks Back. Worry Looks Around. Faith Looks Up! -- Being negative only makes a difficult journey more difficult. You may be given a cactus, but you don't have to sit on it.

                        Comment


                        • I love seeing the pictures of the husbands/SO with the horses! Let's keep them coming!

                          For the record I am single and loving it! But I am not against relationships or marriage! I think it's great to see so many wonderful couples enjoying each other and each other's lives!

                          Maybe my prince will show up one day and maybe he won't but I am immensely happy right now with the way things are.

                          Sandi - you are a fool if you think you are not lonely. Everyone gets lonely. When Mr. Right shows up at your door I really hope you don't scare him away. Everything and everyone deserves a chance.

                          Comment


                          • Amen and excellent advice, Choco!

                            Comment


                            • Chocomare, that's great advice. Truly. Thank you!
                              *Faune D'Helby*

                              Comment


                              • <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Flashy Gray:

                                And a tip of the hat to Moesha! <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

                                And a tap of the whip for sandi!!! Bad girl!

                                Comment


                                • Never mind a tip of the hat for Moesha, fill that sucker with money. THAT was damn funny!
                                  ~~At least I have a positive attitude about my destructive habits~~

                                  Comment


                                  • <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by MAD:
                                    <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Flashy Gray:

                                    And a tip of the hat to Moesha! <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

                                    And a tap of the whip for sandi!!! Bad girl! <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

                                    I bet she gets tapped enough as it is....

                                    Comment


                                    • My husband and I started dating in University and have been together ever since. We eloped (finally) a little over three years ago. Over the course of our relationship, we have both grown and changed. Our committment to each other has remained though.

                                      I owe my husband so much. I do not ever remember laughing or smiling or feeling as loved as I do before we were together. I am not saying that we have not had arguments or hardships, but I find that the support and love that one finds in a marriage is different than any other relationship. As much as I care for my friends and family, it is not the same.

                                      I too have seen the reality of bad marriages both first-hand and through the eyes of friends and family. That is why I am thankful every day for my my husband. I am thankful for his ability to make me laugh, his shoulder to cry on, his strength supporting me when I am unable to carry the weight, his child-like glee that makes me love him.

                                      Sandi, I feel badly for you that you require so much attention that you feel compelled to post on a thread because the sheer "sappiness" of it offends you. Please use some of the "restraint" you prize so highly refusing our "drunk, overweight, bald" husbands and leave this thread to its sappy-squishy-warm-hearted conclusion.

                                      I must be in a bad mood today, if I am snapping at a troll!

                                      Comment


                                      • OK, I can't leave out MY husband.

                                        Unlike Pied Piper, my secret to success is to wait and be patient.

                                        I met Tim a couple of weeks after my 40th birthday, and we married two years later.

                                        He didn't know anything about horses, but is a real animal lover, and loves the horses. When I travel for business, he does the evening feed and mucking (I have someone else do the mornings because he has to leave very early, and Music needs to stay in until 1/2 hr after sunrise). He's even been known to soak an abscess for me. Or meet the vet when he has a day off and I don't.

                                        I was already supporting my horse habit when he met me, so there was never any question of "letting" or "not letting" me have the horses.


                                        In fact, he is the one who discourages me from selling Mr. Brain, even though he KNOWS I bought him as a sales project, and I would probably be able to spend more time with him if I had one less horse in work.

                                        He also does his own laundry.

                                        Like everyone, he isn't perfect, but he has NEVER, in 10 years, made me miserable. (Unlike my previous long term relationships, which weren't THAT bad, but did have their miserable moments.) Angry, frusrated, impatient, yes. But never miserable.

                                        I do have to agree with Sandi on one point:<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> I don't need a man to make me WHOLE. I don't need a man to make me HAPPY. ... I have myself to make me happy and whole. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
                                        If you go into a relationship expecting another person to "make you happy" or "make you whole", then you will probably be disappointed.

                                        But being happy and whole in yourself MAKES the relationship that much more rich and satisfying.

                                        By the way, I travel quite a lot on business. Usually with a predominantly male group. No one has ever hit on me. Nor do I see any of the men doing any real flirting.

                                        I KNOW there are LOTS of people out there, both men and women, who ARE cheating. But nothing like as prevalent as Sandi claims.

                                        Maybe it is the difference between the kind of people who work with computers and telecommunications, and the kind of people who "go to black tie parties in Palm Beach and to country hoe-downs". But probably not.
                                        Janet

                                        chief feeder and mucker for Music, Spy, Belle and Tiara. Someone else is now feeding and mucking for Chief and Brain (both foxhunting now).

                                        Comment


                                        • Oh Moesha, I love you...

                                          Warmheart, what a fabulous love affair you and the Mr. have. You are a lucky woman, and he is a lucky man. True love is a blessing, indeed.

                                          I was married once before. My ex (we'll call him Frankenstein) and I were best friends and dated in college. We were together for 13 years (married for 8). I can't say when our marriage went downhill. Looking back, we shouldn't have gotten married in the first place. I settled. He was not good enough for me.

                                          After being with him for so many years, I was a lot like Sandi. I thought all men were awful - cheats, liars, lazy-good-for-nothing louses who take women for granted and really just want mothers to take care of them and baby them. I wanted to live alone for the rest of my life, have nothing to do with men, and be on my own...without a care for or need for any man in my life.

                                          Well, geez. Let's see. About 3 weeks after my official separation date, I met Mr. PP. We had two different mutual friends in common, and our meeting was serendipity. He changed my views about men *in general*. Yes there are assholes, louses, cheaters, liars, etc. But he showed me what a quality man is like.

                                          Having a RING on my finger has nothing to do with me being happy or not. Having a loving, supportive, caring, honest, trustworthy, quality man in my life makes me happy. And it isn't like I couldn't be happy on my own. Because if I depended on him for my happiness, it wouldn't be genuine.

                                          Really, I was never going to get married again...MAYBE I'd date after a year or so of being divorced. But I said I wouldn't live with anyone, and heck I never wanted to own property again either.

                                          Well, shucks. Look where I am. Bought a farm this year. Married Mr. PP this year. (The neighbor's dog decided she wanted to be part of the ceremony.) Bought a third horse this year. Teaching Mr. PP how to ride. (Not a good picture of him, I wish he had smiled for me!) Never say never, I guess!

                                          Sandi clearly has issues. I'd suggest a good therapist and maybe some Prozac or something.

                                          I don't believe that a woman needs a man to be fulfilled. I believe that women can be happy on their own, and have fulfilling lives being single.

                                          How much money you have (or have dated or whatever) doesn't make you a happy person. I know plenty of people who lead the jet-set lifestyle, have the fancy horses, have the big mansion, eat at the finest restaurants, have a garage full of Porsches, Ferraris, BMW, Mercedes, have vacation homes around the world, belong to the country club, etc...all of these people keep chasing something - happiness. They think that having money and acquiring these things will make them happy. When I buy XYZ, THEN I'll be happy...But they keep chasing and chasing and chasing and no matter how much they acquire, it is never enough. Because they aren't truly happy.
                                          "A horse's face always conveys clearly whether it is loved by its owner or simply used." - Anja Beran

                                          Comment

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