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Inappropriate Attire Award! (keep PG please)

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  • Inappropriate Attire Award! (keep PG please)

    I thought I had the IAAward for lunging my horse in 4" stilettos and dry clean only slacks in a drizzle... but today I think I beat my own record

    temporary flip flops from the pedicure (wet pain included), walking over several inches of ice to medicate my horse's eye.

    Thank god OSHA doesn't make farm calls I am sure someone can top me!
    www.destinationconsensusequus.com
    chaque pas est fait ensemble

  • #2
    Last year I lived on a horse farm and one morning while pouring my OJ I looked out the window and saw my horse staring back at me... he was supposed to be about 500 feet away and behind a fence!

    I ran out in a sports bra and boxer shorts, barefoot and used the dog leash hanging by the door to lead him and the others back to the field.

    Then ran back and tried to fill in the hoof divots in my neighbors yard

    In reality I was wearing more than a bathing suit but it was shameful none the less!

    I also regularly x-country school in just a sports bra with my safety vest over it.
    http://www.clarkdesigngrouparchitects.com/index.html - Lets build your dream barn

    Comment


    • #3
      I decided to stop by the barn to see my horse on the way home from the beach last summer (barn's in the complete opposite direction of the beach, btw) and somehow ended up riding him in my bikini with board shorts on. It was extremely uncomfortable!
      The best is yet to come

      Comment


      • #4
        So... then... is it a bad sign if you tend to leave one leadrope INSIDE the back door for these events?

        I'm pretty much known for long flannel nightgown and wellie type rubber boots.

        But then, I NEVER remember my glasses, so I can't see how scary I am anyway.

        Oh, and wellies do NOTHING to prevent smashed feets.
        InnisFailte Pinto Sporthorses & Coloured Cobs
        ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

        Bits are like cats, what's one more? (Petstorejunkie)

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        • #5
          I pretty much wear whatever, whenever around here. Barefoot, flippy floppies, boots, dress shoes, dress clothes.....I don't care who sees me

          I remember as a kid though, these ladies ALWAYS took their riding lesson in brightly colored breeches (late 80s) and sports bras only. I thought it was so odd and I always wanted to be just like them HAHA
          Kelli
          Horse Drawings!

          Comment


          • #6
            In my dairy barn fairy days, on a Halloween afternoon I once went to work dressed for the entire shift as, well, the Barn Fairy.

            Knee high retina-burning white 4" platform lace-up boots over jeans, sparkly pink sweater, and wings. Yes, wings. Oh, and a wand, of course. The cows didn't care a stitch.

            The platform boots came in super handy after milking when I artificially inseminated a cow -- normally I'd have to stand on an upturned bucket to get the job done. (oops -- was that not PG? Sorry... )

            ETA: on a more horse-related note, way back when I had a "real" job in addition to a boarding business, I used to regularly do a night check / poop pick run in whatever office attire I had on when I got home from second shift. Too tired to change.

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by kellidahorsegirl View Post

              I remember as a kid though, these ladies ALWAYS took their riding lesson in brightly colored breeches (late 80s) and sports bras only. I thought it was so odd and I always wanted to be just like them HAHA
              HARHARHAR!!!!

              Originally posted by BigMama1
              Facts don't have versions. If they do, they are opinions
              GNU Terry Prachett

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              • #8
                Originally posted by kellidahorsegirl View Post

                I remember as a kid though, these ladies ALWAYS took their riding lesson in brightly colored breeches (late 80s) and sports bras only. I thought it was so odd and I always wanted to be just like them HAHA
                Really?? How......horrifyingly odd LOL!!!

                Comment


                • #9
                  inappropriate attire

                  I had a boarder that showed up in a thong and chaps and a tiny tiny bikini top (she had NO boobs) to work her horses. Could not deal with that & she was pissed when I told her that mothers with kids there and daddies picking up kids did not appreciate it and she had to put on some clothes. I explained in a very nice manner, too.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Can someone enlighten me and tell me what "PG" stands for? Thanks!

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by lintesia View Post
                      Can someone enlighten me and tell me what "PG" stands for? Thanks!
                      I think it means like "PG-13", the movie rating system.

                      I used to have to feed the 3 horses at our co-op barn on my way to my office job, dressed in business suit and sneakers (the heels were in my briefcase). Did my best to stay clean, but did not always succeed. I had a total stranger picking hay out of my hair on the bus one morning.

                      I do NOT go to my barn in anything embarrasing, as my barn is in plain view of the main road in and out of my neighborhood - I would never hear the end of it. Bad enough in the shorts, t-shirts and sneakers in the summer when it is blazing hot outside.
                      There are friends and faces that may be forgotten, but there are horses that never will be. - Andy Adams

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                      • #12
                        It's not really the attire that got me in college (okay, after college, too)... everytime I drink, I have to go out and hug my horses. I was always in "bar clothes." Thank GOD I went to an Ag school (Iowa State) and my bar clothes were usually boots, jeans and a slinky top/tank top...

                        2am and here comes drunk hollynanne... I always got my boyfriend (now my husband- so understanding!) to bring me out to hug on my horses... It's actually been one of my questions when interviewing potential new barns. "I like to come see my horses when I'm drunk, is that okay with you?" Always gets a laugh from the BO/BM!

                        It's a good thing I live with my horses now, eh? Not so far to stumble when drunk!
                        Steppin Not Dragon "Bella"
                        Top Shelf "Charlie"
                        Check out the Military + Horses fb page!

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Just tonight, actually, I had to pick my daughter up from the barn and she still hadn't cleaned stalls at 7:30! I didn't want to wait around so, in my slacks, sweater, cashmere scarf and dress coat, I picked ten stalls! I did wear a pair of muck boots, not my heels.

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                          • #14
                            Fellow Iowa Stater here! I remember showing up for a trail ride with a full faceof makeup to cover up how busted I looked from partying the night before. Also, there was a period of time where my warmest coat was a motorcycle jacket. I logged in some saddle time in that!
                            Any time someone talks about their horse in a bar, there's love in the room.

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                            • #15
                              I live in the south, and keep horses at home. My place isn't easily seen from the road or the neighboring houses, so I tend to get lazy about dressing for chores.

                              More than once I've toddled out on warm morning to let everyone in and feed before I have breakfast, (or let them back out again afterward) in a long T-shirt. Only.

                              And, more than once I'm sorry to say, I've been up at the barn dressed like that and heard the UPS truck start up the driveway. As I do the really stupid thing and pelt back down the hill towards the house to get there before the truck comes into view, I'm praying to not slip and fall and give the poor driver a heart attack (or scare him off for good) with a view of a disheveled and half nekkid crazy woman scrambling like a crab looking for a hidey hole

                              Comment


                              • #16
                                Had just gotten out of the shower when I heard hoof beats fly by the bathroom window. Had no clothes in there, just my bath towel, so wrapped it as tight as I could and ran to the dining room window to make sure the front gate was closed (which it is ALWAYS supposed to be). Turns out hubby had left it open (never happens!), and the 2 weanling colts were out running around the yard like maniacs and heading straight for the gate which bars a very busy road (people generally go 60mph on our very straight, long road even though the speed limit is 45mph). No choice but to run out with no shoes and just the towel and try to beat them to the gate or at least head them off at the pass. Thankfully, they veered around the garage and I was able to get to the gate. Sure my ass was hanging out lol! Saw my cowboy neighbor headed over to help round the boys up, so I waved and ran in the house to throw some clothes on! Man, my feet were torn up though - didn't feel it until the adrenaline wore off!

                                Comment


                                • #17
                                  Originally posted by nashfad View Post
                                  I had a boarder that showed up in a thong and chaps and a tiny tiny bikini top (she had NO boobs) to work her horses. Could not deal with that & she was pissed when I told her that mothers with kids there and daddies picking up kids did not appreciate it and she had to put on some clothes. I explained in a very nice manner, too.

                                  Had she come from work? Was she a stripper, per chance?

                                  Comment


                                  • #18
                                    Sure, it's perfectly fine to attend your horses wearing underclothes - they certainly don't care. Just as long as it's your own private place.

                                    What irks me is seeing people in public places in pajamas. Ugh and do you remember the days in the late 60's when going braless was acceptable? I'll take an uncovered sports bra ANYday!

                                    Comment


                                    • #19
                                      Originally posted by saje View Post
                                      I live in the south, and keep horses at home. My place isn't easily seen from the road or the neighboring houses, so I tend to get lazy about dressing for chores.

                                      More than once I've toddled out on warm morning to let everyone in and feed before I have breakfast, (or let them back out again afterward) in a long T-shirt. Only.

                                      And, more than once I'm sorry to say, I've been up at the barn dressed like that and heard the UPS truck start up the driveway. As I do the really stupid thing and pelt back down the hill towards the house to get there before the truck comes into view, I'm praying to not slip and fall and give the poor driver a heart attack (or scare him off for good) with a view of a disheveled and half nekkid crazy woman scrambling like a crab looking for a hidey hole
                                      BWHAHAHHAHAHAHAAAAA!

                                      That gave me a good laugh!!!!! If that were me, I'd end up hiding in the barn and my oh-so-helpful UPS man would bring my delivery from Smartpak directly to the barn (yes, he decides which packages are for horses and humans and delivers appropriately) where he would find a half-naked woman cowering in a stall. No way to really explain that one...

                                      Comment


                                      • #20
                                        I tend to dress "horse appropriate" due to the fact that my mom would kill me if I didn't; however, I have gone trail riding in shorts(bad idea), bathing suit top, and sandals. When we got to the lake I took horsey swimming in my bathing suit and bare feet. That's probably the worst I've done since I don't live on horse property like some of you, and I have to consciously think about what I'm wearing to the barn since I have to drive there.

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