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VERY nasty people on this board

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    VERY nasty people on this board

    i have been lurking, and i have seen some very nasty posts on here. the rules state that you should be polite and respectful of other posters, but i don't see the mods removing anyone's nasty posts. If someone has a question, and they come here for help, 40 percent of people are helpful and 60% are mean and nasty, judgemental and rude. i cannot believe the attitudes here. unless these people are under the age of 22, whewre we all realize you KNOW everything. whatever happened to _"if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all?" i guess some of you never heard that.

    everyone who asks for help is doing so b/c they feel helpless. is it really making YOU the nasty person feel better about yourself to have to tear someone's self esteem down to build your own up? i would think the people asking for help here would become very gun shy of ever asking for help again. i know i am just a lurker, but is it standard procedure to get attacked this way on this site?

    #2
    Originally posted by westernBarbie View Post
    VERY nasty people on this board
    Originally posted by westernBarbie View Post
    60% are mean and nasty, judgemental and rude.
    Originally posted by westernBarbie View Post
    YOU the nasty person


    Originally posted by westernBarbie View Post
    whatever happened to "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all?"


    Yep, I was wondering that myself. Go back to lurking.


    (choo choo! All aboard!)

    Comment


      #3
      I have to say that i definately agree with you. I am only 20, but i definately am not a "know it all", and i have never posted a nasty comment to someone, unless they were nasty to me.

      I have definately been thinking twice lately before i post a new thread b/c i know i am going to get some of those "people" that just cant try and be nice or positive about something. Although usually I will post the new thread b/c there are a lot of good & knowledgeable people on here with good advice.

      But yea, I definately do agree that some people can be down right NASTY! and it is uncalled for.

      well...welcome to COTH, we now have one more "nice" person.
      *We tolerate behaviors in human beings that would horrify us if we saw them in a horse.*
      R.I.P El Salvador*
      [COLOR="SlateGray"]

      Comment


        #4
        Yes, you make a good point... However, having thick skin is necessary in the horse world. I have had nasty comments come my way and I am sure that I have offended others here too... you just have to learn to let it roll off your back. People have good and bad days... taking out frustrations/hormonal imbalances (PMS)/stress/aggravation etc. on someone without a face is easy, too easy but it can, does and will happen, and when it does those who offend should be man/woman enough to offer up an apology if not an explanation.
        \"For all those men who say, \"Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free,\" here\'s an update for you: Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage. Why? Because women realize it\'s not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage.\"-

        Comment


          #5
          And your post is NOT nasty, mean and judgmental?
          Click here before you buy.

          Comment


            #6
            Guess it depends on what you define as nasty. I've seen people get upset and say people were being mean when they were doing nothing more than telling the truth and being honest.

            Now, if someone calls someone else a desperate fat cow, then we're getting into the territory of nasty, IMO.
            "smile a lot can let us ride happy,it is good thing"

            My CANTER blog.

            Comment


              #7
              Your post itself is a little less than nice about these forums, but I understand what you mean.

              Every forum has it's own culture and that of COTH is known for being a little rough around the edges.
              It helps to learn to read between the lines and see that people are people, just like in any other place.
              As someone that doesn't tend to go with the flow, I get my share of less than graceful responses myself.

              Remember that part of these discussions, that you don't seem to like, are so because, where there are two horse people, you can find three opinions.

              Comment


                #8
                This pattern of helpful/rude/judgmental responses to threads is VERY common on other bulletin boards. It seems to be the nature of public internet BB's.

                I wouldn't worry about it.

                I say ask away! Some people WILL help you :-)

                Just expect COTH'ers to speak their mind.

                Also this thread is not horse related, so it may be closed.

                Comment


                  #9


                  If y'don't have nuthin' nice t'say, then don't say nuthin' at all.
                  - Flower the Skunk from Bambi
                  I realize that I'm generalizing here, but as is often the case when I generalize, I don't care. ~ Dave Barry

                  Comment


                    #10
                    I think there are strong opinions, and that some COTHers definately do not "suffer fools gladly"..... but also find a lot of solid input.

                    I know some forums have a culture of always being very tactful, no matter how misguided, ill informed or flat stupid a poster might be. Here, you're more likely to hear "WTF are you THINKING" if you are incredibly off base. I think I like that better than reading tactful platitudes when someone is going down a very wrong path.

                    Comment


                      #11
                      [QUOTE]
                      Originally posted by Bluey View Post
                      Your post itself is a little less than nice about these forums, but I understand what you mean.

                      Every forum has it's own culture and that of COTH is known for being a little rough around the edges.
                      QUOTE]
                      they should never ever play on rec equestrian if they think anyone here has the slightest potential to "hurt your feelings" at least here the moderators can stop in and play nanny....it's not like that in usenet

                      Tamara in TN
                      Production Acres,Pro A Welsh Cobs
                      I am one of the last 210,000 remaining full time farmers in America.We feed the others.

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Yes, I agree with Caffienated...

                        Really, what's "nasty" is a matter of perception via the reader. Of course, some posts are obviously and glaringly *meant* to be taken a specific way, but often times the comprehension of a post is a bit skewed by the context- on the internet there is no vocal inflections or tones, there are no facial expressions (except for the 'smileys' ) and above all, there is no personal communication. When you're sitting face to face talking with someone, you can easily surmise what they're saying and how they're saying it based on all of those things.

                        Over the internet, we don't have that luxury so we are left to our own devices in the perception department- and all perception is based on experience.

                        Oh, and all of the other things Sakura said

                        Something else to keep in mind- when people are passionate about something, it makes them very strong and adamant in their opinions. That said, all of us on this board are passionate about horses; and the many laws of averages and probability (like the old formula of horseworld = 2 ppl, 3 opinions, for example) state that our opinions will more than likely not be in agreement.

                        I think often, what people see posted and consider to be an arguement or a nasty remark is many times just a healthy debate. And if nobody was in disagreement or was too meek to disagree.... well, let's just say I wouldn't be on this board. How else can we learn, if we don't get a new point of view?

                        As a disclaimer to that- of course there are some posters asking questions that they don't want/can't handle honest answers to, and then you'll see what resembles an internet riot or witch hunt- in those cases, 99.999% of the time the responses are not anything personal to the poster; it's the community trying to protect the wellbeing of a horse.... there's lots of posts here like that and they're easy to mistake as people being nasty. You just have to read between the lines, open your mind, and make your own decisions.

                        Besides, a little bit (or a lot!!!) of a new point of view- sugar coated or vinegar dipped- is healthier than none at all.... Think about it
                        Originally posted by Martha Drum
                        ...But I don't want to sit helmetless on my horse while he lies on the ground kicking a ball around without a bridle while Leatherface does an interpretive dance with his chainsaw around us.

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Originally posted by deltawave View Post
                          And your post is NOT nasty, mean and judgmental?
                          That was my first thought when I read it.

                          I find COTH to be the most upfront and honest of all the horse BB I go to. They do not sugar coat things, I think this is good. They do not tell someone they are doing the right thing, when they are not, I think that is a good thing.

                          BBs are like life, not everyone has to agree, it does not make everyone wrong, it just makes us different.

                          I'm going to make some popcorn now, anyone want some?

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Originally posted by caffeinated View Post
                            Guess it depends on what you define as nasty. I've seen people get upset and say people were being mean when they were doing nothing more than telling the truth and being honest.

                            Now, if someone calls someone else a desperate fat cow, then we're getting into the territory of nasty, IMO.
                            Agreed! Sometimes, honesty is necessary if the OP is really looking for help with something.
                            RIP Bo, the real Appassionato
                            5/5/84-7/12/08

                            Comment


                              #15
                              I have learned that it's better to let stuff roll off your back then get caught up in drama or nasty cyber fighting. That's my measly .02 cents.

                              Comment


                                #16
                                Originally posted by trubandloki View Post
                                I'm going to make some popcorn now, anyone want some?



                                Yes please, I prefer any of the 'Kettle Corn' varieties....
                                Originally posted by Martha Drum
                                ...But I don't want to sit helmetless on my horse while he lies on the ground kicking a ball around without a bridle while Leatherface does an interpretive dance with his chainsaw around us.

                                Comment


                                  #17
                                  I've been on this board for a few years and LOVE it. My horse has been colicing this past week and I've been so upset. Coming on the board is like my free therapy - everyone has been nice, caring and understanding. Same case last year when my horse was put down. It's like my support system.

                                  Yes, many people, tell it like it is (which I LIKE - I ask for opinions and that's what I want) - and, yes, some people can be rude - but not 60%. I've been on a few horsey boards and this is by far my favorite. Maybe if you actually participated with an open mind you could see the reality of it.
                                  Last edited by PinkPonies; Apr. 6, 2007, 10:30 AM.

                                  Comment


                                    #18
                                    There are certain people I ignore because their posts are always bordering on rude...not nasty but VERY superior and of the "you shouldn't own a horse as you have no business riding" line of responding.

                                    Most of the responses to my questions and comments have been polite, helpful, sympathetic and supportive and I really appreciate them. The ones that are posted that are rude, well, I give them the attention they deserve....none.

                                    Do a search on one of my earlier threads...."crusty horsepeople"....I think the responses are very revealing.
                                    Ransomed from Suerteland.

                                    Half the failures in life arise from pulling in one's horse as he is leaping.
                                    August Hare

                                    Comment


                                      #19
                                      I think it's BB's in general. I also find that the majority of those who are "nasty" remain anonymous, saying things they would never to someone face to face. I simply ignore them. And I have no problem with someone disagreeing with me as long as they're respectful and again, don't mind stating who they are.

                                      I would also like to say I have quite a bit of respect for many on the BB....and interestingly enough these fine folks have always identified themselves. The most surprising thing to me, I have become friends with a few COTHer's, even some who do not live close.
                                      Debbie Hanson
                                      www.ratemyhorsepro.com


                                      Comment


                                        #20
                                        Originally posted by Appassionato View Post
                                        Agreed! Sometimes, honesty is necessary if the OP is really looking for help with something.
                                        That is so true.

                                        Comment

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