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NASTY barn visitor...now morphed into a discussion of class, and lack thereof

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  • #21
    Originally posted by Evalee Hunter
    **IT IS NOT YOUR BUSINESS!!** You don't run the barn. You don't own the barn. You should NOT take it upon yourself to tell others what to do. It is not your place to tell anyone the rules, nor your place to try to enforce them. It is also not your place to tattle to the barn owner. Grow up.

    Geez guys, lets lighten up. I think if anything she really was just venting. We've all been there.

    This is staarting to feel like the Dressage board! I think we all need to find our center and re-aline our chi.
    I've got the 3 things men want. I'm hot, and I'm smart!

    -The 6th Member Of The Bareback Riders Clique-

    Comment


    • #22
      Bashing the care at a given barn, while standing there is rude. A teenager glaring at an adult is rude. The fact is that there are different standards or care which do NOT harm the horses. If this horse was out most of the day and camein to a clean stall then messed it up (as they are known to do) so be it.

      Looking down one's nose a different barns is rude and snobbish. I'm sure someone who's boarded at Hunterdon all their life might see most of our barns as "hideous" but most of our horses are happy and fat and living the good life.

      We see the same attitude right here on COTH from time to time. Some one asks a question about rough board and someone chimes in about how "they'd NEVER let their horse live like that..."

      OTOH, there's not much you can do when someone bashes your barn, just smile and say "bless your heart my dear, your horse must think he's at the Ritz Carlton..."
      F O.B
      Resident racing historian ~~~ Re-riders Clique
      Founder of the Mighty Thoroughbred Clique

      Comment


      • #23
        Well.....just take her comments with a grain of salt (and next time, hard though it may be, bite your tongue). That's the hardest thing to do, but I've learned the hard way to just go about my business pretending I am deaf, of course as long as the animal is not in phyiscal danger. Then, I'd step in.

        Comment


        • #24
          Boy, Alysheba, you are really good at reading comprehension & obviously have more money than brains:

          [quote] “Money means nothing, My husband and I are wealthy and my daughter would get knocked the f*** out if she EVER spoke to someone like that. Then when she woke up, I would send her to their house to scrub their toilets for a week. I HATE snobby children. And while Mom did try to intervene, she obviously lets too much slide. Also, its obvious the kid really doesnt love horses...everyone knows horse poop smells good! (:” [end quote]

          [quote] “I agree, but the kid still had no right to glare at SBT” [end quote]

          Now, from the original post:
          [quote] “Tonight the mom brought along her sister, whose daughter does the "A" circuit, gets the "best" everything, etc. Y'all know the type. I was minding my own business when I heard the sister whispering, "The stall is disgusting. It smells!" Well, 17 y/o's horse is a pig in the worst possible way, and had been in the stall for most of the day. Stall was cleaned at 9 a.m; it was now 8 p.m. I felt like handing over my pitchfork so the sister could remedy the obvious atrocity of poop piles in the stall, but I bit my tongue.” [end quote]

          The person in the original post is an ADULT with a child old enough to be showing.

          If the birth date given in the profile is accurate, SBT is a young woman, almost certainly younger than the person she mouthed off to about hay.

          I’ll say it again – she doesn’t own the barn, she doesn’t manage the barn, she should shut her mouth & mind her own business, especially when interacting with her elders. If the barn owner is truly concerned about hay usage, hay should be locked up.

          Comment


          • #25
            Linny - I enjoy your posts on TBs about which you are extremely knowledgeable. But SBT is a young woman mouthing off to an older adult. This post has nothing to do with a "child" (or teenager) glaring at anyone - the teenager wasn't present. The adults were the teenager's mother & the mother's sister. The child in this whole thing is the original poster.

            Comment


            • #26
              Originally posted by slc2
              taste of reality helps too. there are very few boarding barns that would agree that your horse needs to have hay in front of him 24/7.
              Fine, but if that is what the horse owner wants and the horse owner is willing to pay for it, what's the problem with that? Furthermore, I never suggested that hay 24/7 is necessary or desirable, because I also think horses should have adequate turnout (and I am not going to get into what I think adequate turnout is, but mine are out at least 12 hours a day).

              I don't board my horses so that I can take care of them the way I want to. But when I did board them, I had a very positive experience because I guess I found a barn that was a good match. And no, this barn was not a show barn, just a nice private farm run by some very good horsemen.
              Roseknoll Sporthorses
              www.roseknoll.net

              Comment


              • #27
                Unfortunately, you will always run into people with horses with different opinions. I have moved into an area where my discipline isn't as popular and I have heard alot I don't agree with. I am the new one here and fortunately I keep mine at home. I have perfected the smile and nod with the comment of "that's nice". The less you know and hear about others, sometimes is the better. I try to stay in my own little world, cause I'm happiest here. You don't want to make the situation worse to the point where you don't enjoy the thought of going to the barn b/c of people you don't like/tolerate. I'll agree with you that these comments would have been better made out of your earshot, but it seems like the boarder actually stuck up for the barn. You are happy there right??? Smile and nod...smile and nod.

                Comment


                • #28
                  I had a boarding barn. I have moved and now lease several acres and 2 nice barns. The farm owner has suggested I board if I want to. I don't desire to BUT if I did, I want someone like the OP there. Why? Because I know that she is a boarder that is going to look out for my farm when I am not there. She shows obvious concern for the property and the rules.

                  I would definately want to know if someone is on my property verbally shredding it and taking hay or anything else for that matter. And I would be grateful that the person thinks enough of my property and myself to defend it.

                  The OP sounds very much more mature than the so-called adults in this situation.

                  It is very unfortunate that our society has become a "not my business" society. Maybe we wouldn't have the problems we have if more people took an active part in the world around them.

                  Comment


                  • #29
                    personalities in the boarding barn

                    After reading all these posts I am forever grateful that I can keep my horses at home..When I had to board my horses many years ago I could not stand the politics of the barn..Everbody knew more than everybody else..If I had extra stalls rest assured I would not get into the boarding business..Personally, after experiencing a horse with ulcers I would never leave a horse in a stall without hay in front of him or her at all times..If I waste it, then its my money I am wasting..If I was in the situation where I was boarding then it would have to be at a place where i could pay extra and make sure that was done..Boarding is a very hard and time consuming business to run and the bitching and complaining that goes on every day would be more than my temperment could tolerate..I feel sorry for barn owners alot hearing what I do..A little niceness goes along way..and I dont feel a persons money or lack there of has anything to do with it..

                    Comment


                    • #30
                      I think there are times when age doesn't matter. And shame on the "adult" who had to be reminded by a younger person that she was stomping around like Queen Sheba doing what she wanted in another person's barn. That would be like going into someone else's house and dumping four cups of food to the house cat.

                      And being snotty and nasty in a barn, in front of other boarders, is just rude.

                      Yes, the OP is venting. So what? We all do it, esp me . I think there is an amazing amount of negativity flowing her way; unless she has stepped in it on another thread and I'm just not aware of it, I think it all seems rather harsh. Personally, if I had already fed horses in my barn and one of my boarders dumped four flakes of hay to a chubby horse, I'd be hacked off. Yes, horses should have food in front of them all the time; however it is not always financially feasible or healthy, and we don't know what kind of hay this was either. What if the chunky pony was getting a load of timothy or alfalfa tossed in its stall? That's just as bad IMO.
                      COTH's official mini-donk enabler

                      "I am all for reaching out, but in some situations it needs to be done with a rolled up news paper." Alagirl

                      Comment

                      • Original Poster

                        #31
                        Ya know, this board never ceases to amaze me...

                        FWIW, I'm a senior employee at this barn and it IS my job to enforce policy when the BO is not around. The horse did NOT need that much hay. The stall in question was NOT that dirty, and it did NOT "smell." If they really thought it was that bad, they could have cleaned it. But no, bitching is more fun...

                        As for ME being rude, I only responded in kind to what was being said in front of me. I did not "mouth off" to this woman, as much as I wanted to.

                        Thanks to TheJenners, RainDancer, and others who can see where I'm coming from.
                        Last edited by SBT; May. 28, 2006, 01:55 PM.

                        Comment


                        • #32
                          Originally posted by YankeeLawyer
                          When my horses are stalled, I never want to see them without hay, and I would rather have to throw out a bit of hay in the morning than have them standing around without hay. Plenty of hay and water, among other things, helps stave off colic and keeps them from developing bad habits out of boredom.
                          uh, I would have to disagree with this. My little mare stays quite plump on 3 flakes of grass hay a day, if she had food in front of her all the time she'd explode.

                          Comment


                          • #33
                            [QUOTE=Evalee Hunter]Boy, Alysheba, you are really good at reading comprehension & obviously have more money than brains:

                            [quote] “Money means nothing, My husband and I are wealthy and my daughter would get knocked the f*** out if she EVER spoke to someone like that. Then when she woke up, I would send her to their house to scrub their toilets for a week. I HATE snobby children. And while Mom did try to intervene, she obviously lets too much slide. Also, its obvious the kid really doesnt love horses...everyone knows horse poop smells good! (:” [end quote]

                            [quote] “I agree, but the kid still had no right to glare at SBT” [end quote]

                            Now, from the original post:
                            “Tonight the mom brought along her sister, whose daughter does the "A" circuit, gets the "best" everything, etc. Y'all know the type. I was minding my own business when I heard the sister whispering, "The stall is disgusting. It smells!" Well, 17 y/o's horse is a pig in the worst possible way, and had been in the stall for most of the day. Stall was cleaned at 9 a.m; it was now 8 p.m. I felt like handing over my pitchfork so the sister could remedy the obvious atrocity of poop piles in the stall, but I bit my tongue.” [end quote]

                            The person in the original post is an ADULT with a child old enough to be showing.

                            If the birth date given in the profile is accurate, SBT is a young woman, almost certainly younger than the person she mouthed off to about hay.

                            I’ll say it again – she doesn’t own the barn, she doesn’t manage the barn, she should shut her mouth & mind her own business, especially when interacting with her elders. If the barn owner is truly concerned about hay usage, hay should be locked up.
                            Well, if I had the choice I would rather have money than brains.

                            Ya can't pay bills, rescue horses and buy rescue groups much needed supplies with brains!
                            I've got the 3 things men want. I'm hot, and I'm smart!

                            -The 6th Member Of The Bareback Riders Clique-

                            Comment


                            • #34
                              Originally posted by SBT
                              Ya know, this board never ceases to amaze me...

                              FWIW, I'm a senior employee at this barn and it IS my job to enforce policy when the BO is not around. The horse did NOT need that much hay. The stall in question was NOT that dirty, and it did NOT "smell." If they really thought it was that bad, they could have cleaned it. But no, bitching is more fun...

                              As for ME being rude, I only responded in kind to what was being said in front of me. I did not "mouth off" to this woman, as much as I wanted to.

                              Thanks to TheJenners, RainDancer, and others who can see where I'm coming from.

                              Some of these ppl are real meanies. I think they need to get laid.
                              I've got the 3 things men want. I'm hot, and I'm smart!

                              -The 6th Member Of The Bareback Riders Clique-

                              Comment


                              • #35
                                Originally posted by SBT
                                Ya know, this board never ceases to amaze me...

                                FWIW, I'm a senior employee at this barn and it IS my job to enforce policy when the BO is not around. The horse did NOT need that much hay. The stall in question was NOT that dirty, and it did NOT "smell." If they really thought it was that bad, they could have cleaned it. But no, bitching is more fun...

                                As for ME being rude, I only responded in kind to what was being said in front of me. I did not "mouth off" to this woman, as much as I wanted to.

                                Thanks to TheJenners, RainDancer, and others who can see where I'm coming from.

                                I feel for you. some times on this board, people will disagree just to disagree. as a boarder i DO think it is YOUR business if someone is using up the hay that will feed your horse. and i would not have been so nice. i would told that kid to be a little nicer if she does not belong there. She was a guest, i am guessing, since you said she does not have a horse there? some people are just born thinking they deserve to treat everyone like crap.

                                Comment


                                • #36
                                  Why get so wounds up about it? You know better, so why would it bother you? I feel rather sorry for people who behave that way (them, not you ) because they have no idea about real life and it will hit them in their behind sooner or later anyways.....

                                  Comment


                                  • #37
                                    Originally posted by Coup De Des
                                    ohhh give them a break... twelve hours between stall cleaning is a terribly long time. I feel sorry for the horse to have a, been kept in it's stall for this long and b, for not having had it's stalled cleaned earlier.

                                    As for her comment about horses needing food in front of them all the time.. I don't have a problem with that.. all our horses have food in front of them. I Certainly would give my horse 4 flakes of hay to keep him busy over night.

                                    In regards to the mom feeding the horse each day - i certainly don't expect anyone else to look after my horse for me.. and perhaps she genuinly likes the horse and spending time with it - it's her decision, not yours.

                                    Back off... MYOB Go ride your horse and stop worrying about the other people.
                                    I completely agree with you. While my porky pony certainly doesnt need food in front of him 24/7, a horse does need more hay than just morning and night. They should be moving theor gut throughout the day. I am fastidious about my stalls, also. If she comes from an "A" show barn, that is what she is used to and it is quite possible that the barn she saw is NOT up to what she considers proper care. I wouln't think the situation you described is ok for my horse.
                                    Save a life...be an organ donor! Visit www.Transplantbuddies.org

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                                    • #38
                                      “Money means nothing, My husband and I are wealthy and my daughter would get knocked the f*** out if she EVER spoke to someone like that. .
                                      Well, that certainly proves money and class are not mutually inclusive
                                      Save a life...be an organ donor! Visit www.Transplantbuddies.org

                                      Comment


                                      • #39
                                        Originally posted by Silk
                                        Well, that certainly proves money and class are not mutually inclusive

                                        Again, if I had to choose between money and CLASS, I would choose money, you can't rescue horses and buy rescue groups much needed supplies with CLASS!

                                        At my funeral my children will talk about all the things I did to change the world and make it a better place.

                                        At hers...they will say she had "class"

                                        By the way, my daughter has only gotten spanked twice in her life. Why? because I raised her to have CLASS and never treat ppl that way!

                                        Nuff said.
                                        I've got the 3 things men want. I'm hot, and I'm smart!

                                        -The 6th Member Of The Bareback Riders Clique-

                                        Comment


                                        • #40
                                          Not all of us believe in spanking children. I'm a good kid and I've never been hit in my life.

                                          Not all of us believe that making the world a better place for others is the greatest virtue.

                                          And who cares how old SBT is, if she's an employee, she has every right to enforce barn policy. And really, as a boarder, she probably has more right to enforce it than a visitor does to dictate it.

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