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"Give me"/"Let me"

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  • "Give me"/"Let me"

    IrishKarma's situation (and a few others) brings up, once again, the "give me syndrome" (as in give me something of yours) and the "let me" (let me use something of yours)

    Fortunately I have avoided most of these but I do have a couple of examples

    "give me": a co-worker at the office came up to me one day and said "a friend of mine wants someone to give her a horse - where can she get one?" After staring at her for a bit I gave her the name of a local resuce (was that bad of me?) and left it at that (rather than launch into a lecture about $, committment, time, knowledge, etc)

    "let me": most common of course is "Let me ride your horse". I did give in to that for a time on a pony I had bought from the knackerman (i.e. rescue pony) that was too small for me really. The person was very sweet and nice and took good care of pony and all but there was never any thought of any $s to offset cost of care for pony or effort to keep up the barn. Eventually I got rider to clean the pony's stall when she came by and rode (whooohoooo).

    "let me": use your mare as a surrogate. Oh sure, my mare should take on the risks of foaling for yours? My mare is a higher quality to begin with and why in the world would I put her at risk in such a way? Yes, I may breed her one day but that is quite another matter.



    What are your best 'give me/let me's?
    Nothing says "I love you" like a tractor. (Clydejumper)

    The reports states, “Elizabeth reported that she accidently put down this pony, ........, at the show.”

  • #2
    At the barn I constantly get, "let me ride your horse" from almost everyone. NOT!

    Another "let me" was last moth with an ex-neighbor while we were in the process of moving from suburbia out to the barn proper (we are leasing the other house on the property). Here's the gist of the conversation:

    Her: "How many horses are out there?"
    Me: "Dunno. About 40."
    Her: "Ask her if she will let me ride them for her."
    Me: "Well, it's a lesson barn, Pony Club, and they do "A" shows. There are lots of kids to ride the horses. You could always come out and take lessons."
    Her: "I already know how to ride. I grew up riding a horse. I just haven't ridden since I was a teenager. Tell her I can ride them."

    Yah. Sure. Okay! NOT!

    Eileen
    Mad Mare™ Studio
    Custom Swarovski®, Czech glass and gemstone browbands in Circlet, Diadem and Tiara styles. Matching stock pins, bracelets and belts.
    http://MadMare.com

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    • #3
      On the flip side....

      "I will let you ride my super horse."

      Horse is green and/or has training/behavioral issues. Hooray, it is so fun putting free training on your horse! And nearly getting killed in the process!

      "I will let you work off your board."

      That means doing 25 stalls, feeding, turnout, grooming, riding rank horses. For $3 an hour. 5 days a week. Awesome!
      We couldn't all be cowboys, so some of us are clowns.

      Comment


      • #4
        From every trainer that's come to look at my sale horse - "Let me take him on trial for a month". And it's always at least four hours' drive from me, with a trainer that I don't know from a bag of frogs. And they just don't seem to understand why I say no.
        In loving memory of Laura Jahnke.
        A life lived by example, done too soon.
        www.caringbridge.org/page/laurajahnke/

        Comment


        • #5
          My employer used to do gymkhana when he was a kid (over 25 years ago). He asked me one day if I knew of anyone who would just let him get on and go ride on his own (and gallop, of course). I was like uh yea sure, if someone would like to let some completely inexperienced yahoo kill their horse out on a trail, I'll let you know! (I didn't actually say that but that's what was going through my head).

          I now also don't let anyone borrow any of my stuff after losing several pieces of equipment - bits, wraps, and who knows what else. Frustrating!
          HorseStableReview.com - Tell others what you know! Post your barn or review today.

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          • #6
            I've been hit more than once with not even a "give me"/"let me", but a total entitlement issue.

            "Oh, you have horses? My granddaughter LOVES horses! I'll let you know when she's available to come over and ride them!" Um, no.

            "You've decided to keep Casper? You're leaving him at the trainer's though, right? Because I'm planning to ride him in my lessons, now that he's not crazy anymore. He's sooo pretty!" I took Casper home not a week later.

            "I need to borrow your truck and trailer to move a horse." I don't have a sign on either vehicle, saying they're for hire.....

            I also get the morons who think they can ride, since they took lessons about 40 years ago on a school pony, and "volunteer" to exercise mine. You wanna ride my two highly trained horses, and probably get your sorry butt injured in the process? Naw, don't think so.
            Homeopathy claims water can cure you since it once held medicine. That's like saying you can get sustenance from an empty plate because it once held food.

            Comment


            • #7
              Just got contacted last week by my old high school buddy from way back.
              Very cool to chat for a bit...but as soon as she heard I had horses her first question was, "Will they buck me off?" No, it's hard to get bucked off if you're not on them. Next question, "Well how about my kids, are they okay for pony rides?"
              The sad part is...I'm almost always up for getting kids into and onto horses or riding with friends who haven't had a chance to ride in ages. but do not automatically assume that since I have horses that I have them specifically for public entertainment purposes.
              You jump in the saddle,
              Hold onto the bridle!
              Jump in the line!
              ...Belefonte

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              • #8
                "Can I come out and ride?????"

                LMAO over here...I get that all the time.. I stopped it by hanging a picture on my desk of my young gelding acting ...shall we say "naughty" ...okay - REALLY naughty while I was riding him one windy cold day!! If someone dares to ask anyway, I show them the picture and say..only if you are willing ride him!
                Julie
                www.equusvilla.blogspot.com
                www.ridingaside.blogspot.com
                www.miniaturecheviot.blogspot.com

                Comment


                • #9
                  Oh - I have to add...I had one woman want me to bring in a bag of fresh manure - into an office mind you!! - for her garden! She looked positively shocked when I told her NO WAY.
                  Julie
                  www.equusvilla.blogspot.com
                  www.ridingaside.blogspot.com
                  www.miniaturecheviot.blogspot.com

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Roan View Post

                    Her: "How many horses are out there?"
                    Me: "Dunno. About 40."
                    Her: "Ask her if she will let me ride them for her."

                    THAT is the WORST thing people ask me -- ask "so-and-so" if I can "whatever"... I HATE that!! Ask yourself!!
                    Jigga:
                    Why must you chastise my brilliant idea with facts and logic? **picks up toys (and wine) and goes home**

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      I get it all the time as well. "Can I have a horse?" Um...no. They all have adoption fees and you first have to qualify under our contract stipulations.

                      "Can I ride your horses?" Sure if you would like to volunteer, sign a waiver and first put in enough hours volunteering to prove to me that you are capable and willing to provide the work it takes to EARN your ride!
                      Don't breed- Adopt your steed!
                      Mountain View Rescue

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                      • Original Poster

                        #12
                        Originally posted by arabhorse2 View Post
                        .........."I need to borrow your truck and trailer to move a horse." I don't have a sign on either vehicle, saying they're for hire......
                        oh yes arabhorse2 - forgot about the truck/trailer one

                        sure, I scrimped and saved to buy/maintain/put gas in my vehicles but would be happy to let you (inexperienced at pulling a trailer) take your horse (inexperienced at being trailered) take my only transportation any time you want to ---- ummm, NOT
                        Nothing says "I love you" like a tractor. (Clydejumper)

                        The reports states, “Elizabeth reported that she accidently put down this pony, ........, at the show.”

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          I used to love it when people would ask to ride my Deuce. I almost always said yes...

                          ... and let me tell you, after their ride they never asked to ride him again!

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            When people ask to ride my horses (which I have no intention of letting them) I usually say,"SURE! I'll put you on Magic. He'll REALLY give you a GGOOODD ride! Can you hang on good? My trainer called him the psycho arab." They then say,"Oh, I was just kidding."

                            I don't do the 3rd party thing either - if some says some has asked them to ask me to do something I usually tell them they have to come ask me themselves. Never happens, though.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              As Nancy Regan once said..

                              Just Say No.

                              Comment


                              • #16
                                How about the ones who just assume they're coming over on a specific weekend to ride? I had a co-worker ask me what I was doing on May XX (just a date) and I said don't know, I don't plan that far ahead. She said "I'm coming over to ride." Oh sure, okay, I'll put aside my whole weekend for you to come out and lead you around on trails. I just told her I was busy afterall.

                                Then there were the ones that I invited out to go for a trail ride. I said 10:00 so at 10:00 the horses were tacked and waiting for them to show. Around 10:30 they called and said they were going out to breakfast and be out after that. Right, at what point did you forget how to tell time and the last time we spoke, 10:00 was the agreed time. I put the horses away and they showed up at 1:00 expecting to go for a ride. I told them to go away and when you learn to respect other people's time, we might work something out. Never heard from them again.

                                I get this kind of crap all the time. I invite people to come watch an event that I'm in and they think it's an invitation to ride. What do people think? My horses are for your entertainment?
                                Yogurt - If you're so cultured, how come I never see you at the opera? Steven Colbert

                                Comment


                                • #17
                                  Telephone inquiry to my trainer, who runs a high level eventing/training facility:

                                  Guy: Do you do birthday parties?

                                  Trainer: No, I'm sorry, we do not. We do have a wonderful lesson program if you are interested in getting your child involved with horses.

                                  Guy (direct quote): You mean you don't just let people come out and gallop around?

                                  Uh, no. The only people "galloping around" are eventers who are in training and know what they are doing. Sorry.
                                  "If kindness and gentleness are at all an option, they are the only option." -- Kelly Catlin

                                  Comment


                                  • #18
                                    When I went to buy my wedding dress, I was talking to the saleswoman and mentioned that I had horses. Of course she asks if they can be ridden, which it turns out means "when can I come ride them". When I told her that I would give her the number of the local public riding stable, she was no longer interested.

                                    Comment


                                    • #19
                                      Have you ever noticed that the less experience a person has with horses, the more they will insist they know everything and and the more of a yahoo they really are?

                                      The old adage, "a little knowledge is a dangerous thing" is SO true. Mark Twain, I think.

                                      Eileen
                                      Mad Mare™ Studio
                                      Custom Swarovski®, Czech glass and gemstone browbands in Circlet, Diadem and Tiara styles. Matching stock pins, bracelets and belts.
                                      http://MadMare.com

                                      Comment


                                      • #20
                                        Originally posted by Roan View Post
                                        Have you ever noticed that the less experience a person has with horses, the more they will insist they know everything and and the more of a yahoo they really are?

                                        The old adage, "a little knowledge is a dangerous thing" is SO true. Mark Twain, I think.

                                        Eileen
                                        Alexander Pope, actually.
                                        In loving memory of Laura Jahnke.
                                        A life lived by example, done too soon.
                                        www.caringbridge.org/page/laurajahnke/

                                        Comment

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