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How about some self moderation?

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  • #61
    I agree with Wings et. al.

    I also agree with Moesha in that we can't judge anyone's true nature unless we know them. Miniwelsh and Rockstarr may well be very nice, caring, compassionate people in real life. BUT... personally, what I've read on here from them, I haven't liked. I didn't like the tones, and especially in november and this last bit, their entire motives. Their personality off the boards is not drawn into question - their demeanor within this community is.

    This place is, essentially, a community. Thus, everone should interact in communal fashion, watching out for each other and keeping everyone's feelings and best interests in mind. They shouldn't rely on the government (aka moderators) to keep things in order, it should be a group effort, with the government overseeing everything and ensuring that it runs smoothly and, of course, dealing with offenders.

    Or, maybe I've just got a keep-everyone-happy-and-avoid-conflict mindset.


    Lindsay & Chance
    "Success is relative to how well you stay
    on the horse."
    ^^^^Proud member of the DCSC!^^^^
    "Show me the back of a thoroughbred horse, and I will show you my wings."


    • #62
      Very well said, ETBW...and very timely. (I think- could someone email me and tell me what the heck happened? I'm so out of the loop I can't even see the track. thanks- I'll probably appreciate it more if I know something about the situation )
      ****Indecision may or may not be my problem****


      • Original Poster

        I do SO much love the people on these forums. I have met Colin as well as Miniwelsh several times and I like them. I am not them. (Do wish I knew Rockstarr!)

        As HN73 points out, this is a familial melting pot.

        I did not begin this topic to rehash the topics of the past, but to ask that all of us keep in mind that we are on this BB under a set of rules that we agreed to.

        Each of us has our own reasons for feeling a part of the COTH BB community. No one said we had to get along, just that we had to play nice and discuss topics relating to issues concerning our mutual interest in horses and horse sports.

        We have come together, through the COTH forums, to donate funds to provide a future to a horse via the Exceller Fund. We have come together, sharing our own joys and sorrows, triumphs and failures and have come to know each other better than many of us know our own family.

        The silliness of the rerouting of the "Saddlebred Rescue" into the "PLight of the Peeps", the heartwrenching trauma of M_J and poor Cherry Upper's death, adoption of "Patriot", the loss of our dear CactusKate, the volunteered efforts for regional Horse Rescues that many participated in, and the huge outpouring of support and mutual kindness that so many have become a part of through the shared anticipation of RolexH's marriage, pregnancy and the concern for Aiden are far beyond what any Horse Forum could possibly anticipate.

        Back when the BB members numbered in the many hundreds, concern was that a small group would so dominate the dialog that interested parties would not join in, feeling out of the loop.

        Unfortunately, memories of those past years reminders to "take it to email" or "avoid cliquishness" has some wanting the 6,000 members to be scolded as well when individual topics go beyond "horse related".

        Those early days are so far gone that there seems to be no need to worry that any small group of members would cause anyone to not feel at home here.

        What, in the early days, would be reason for a moderator to chime in is no longer the concern. The days of being chastised for being the Virginia Clique is so gone as to be silly.

        Now, I ask again, Please think before you post and post with the intention of creating another bit of forum usefulness, albeit knowledge, humor or general well being.

        Friendship is Love without his wings
        -Lord Byron
        "If you would have only one day to live, you should spend at least half of it in the saddle."


        • #64
          I've already done my mea culpa, as have most of the people who posted on the thread that so many of you seem to have read even though you were appalled by it ... and read into it what was never said.

          To me, the key difference between this situation and the other is this: We've publicly apologized; we've agree that we went overboard in our silliness; we've promised to behave better.

          Where did anyone involved in the other situation, despite warnings, do anything similar? Why cannot that difference be recognized?

          As for parents worrying about juniors being corrupted by what was essentially innuendo on "that thread," I happen to think that some of the threads that glorify "the fun" of getting drunk at horse shows and the resulting pukking of one's guts out (and, sorry, I am not above pointing out that at least one of the banned folks took great pride in relating the details); the discussions of the wild partying and the confessions of what goes on under the influence; the instances when someone blatantly told the moderators on a heated thread to ".... off" should be of much greater concern.

          But I think that is the whole point of Wingsy's comments, isn't it? We all bring different worldviews to the BB. We need to consider all of them in what we post. I've agreed to do that; I've made the decision to go forward from here, chastised. Admitting one's mistakes is part of being an adult.

          ** Dear Cupid: All I really want for Valentine's Day is flying LEAD CHANGES!! **
          Congratulate me! My CANTER cutie is an honor student at Goofball University!


          • #65
            As you all might remember, I started that thread that began as a productive conversation about the content of this board and ended when the maturity level of some members on the board prevented any sort of productivity. Honestly, I couldn't believe that Erin would ban Mini and Rockstarr after the complaint about the other thread. At least from what I (and any other member on this board) could see, Miniwelsh and Rockstarr were both positive, knowledgeable, and important members to the close BB community that everyone is so fond of. Apparently once having spoken out about something (note - without breaking any rules in the process) is enough "prior trouble" to then be labelled a pot-stirrer when they decide to come back. Personally I had been wishing that both Mini and Rockstarr would come back. I really think that people get a bit out of hand jumping to conclusions about the motives of others.

            Frankly, I see no reason why a complaint about a post that was already a privelege, being OT, that had become of a matter not appropriate for a public bulletin board should be reason for a)people to jump all over them as pot-stirrers and b)for them to get banned. It's ridiculous. Unlike Colin, who clearly did troll, I hardly see the threat that Rockstarr and Miniwelsh posed to Erin or to the BB But if Erin saw fit to ban them, then fine. But I really think some people need to get off of their preaching about the wonderful BB community that seems such a popular excuse for OT posting while at the same time criticizing the way others might feel about it. Come on, people, remember what the Chronicle of the HORSE forums are here for, please



            • #66
              What Beezer said. I can only do one mea culpa per thread. And would the people who think it's funny to send me anon emails and give me their opinion about my life please stop.


              • #67
                And, not to ruffle anyone's feathers but one would think that you all could just settle to be happy with the fact that, despite serious support against it, you all still have full rights to discuss Baby Aiden at your heart's content here on our horse BB.



                • #68
                  The last thing I want is for this BB to become like that "other" board.....you know, one dissenting opinion and you're outta here...

                  "A good horse is never a bad color." Anonymous
                  \"A good horse is never a bad color.\" Anonymous


                  • #69
                    Now, it was edited rather quickly (by a moderator) but one of the recently departed started a thread, whose title was a derogatory take off on one of the moderators names. (Does that make sense? ) That was a small part of why they were banned - also that they insisted on arguing about how the BB is moderated - when it has been made very clear that that is something that is not up for discussion. Either play by the rules, or.... And when the rules are broken over and over by the same people, well then, what do you expect? Sure, we've all been guilty of not being perfect little angels 100% of the time, but most of us make an effort to make this an enjoyable place.
                    I'm quite sure that none of the moderators are angry over someone raising a flag about the contents of a thread. Once again, it was the way it was done, not the issue itself. Rule number one is 'no personal attacks'.

                    I have to agree with Beezer here...

                    <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> To me, the key difference between this situation and the other is this: We've publicly apologized; we've agree that we went overboard in our silliness; we've promised to behave better.


                    It just seems that with some people, there just is no willingness to compromise.

                    [This message was edited by Merlin on Jan. 16, 2003 at 07:43 PM.]


                    • #70
                      I am just now reading this topic again, as four pages added to a new thread in one day caught my interest. I was previously unaware of the circumstances that initiated this thread.

                      It seems to me that a lot of people here are pointing fingers, getting defensive, and rehashing the past. I don't care why Wings started this thread. Does it matter? The point has been made. Now get over it.

                      The opinions expressed in this post are not neccessarily the views of this poster.~
                      ~This is *way* more fun than doing something productive~


                      • Original Poster

                        #1) This topic was not about "the deleted OT auction" thread - although quite a few have seriously rethought their participation (including me - remember? I brought up nekkid)

                        #2) This topic, as well as the awful day before T'day in November, is about the general nature of many of the threads recently and certianly NOT about Aiden.

                        Aiden, like CactusKate, Patriot, Volunteer day and the discussions surrounding M_J are the natural progression that comes from a group of like minded individuals CARING about a subject, be it horse related or not.

                        #3) People need to back up and get a good view of things instead of clinging to a reaction like a dog to a bone. Maturity, it seems, has nothing to do with age but everything to do with common sense and intellect.

                        Realizing that one has stepped beyond the bounds and personally resolving to refrain from that behavior again is what counts. Not crossing that line and, when finding you aren't caught, doing it again.

                        I repeat the title of this topic. How about some self moderation?

                        Friendship is Love without his wings
                        -Lord Byron
                        "If you would have only one day to live, you should spend at least half of it in the saddle."


                        • #72
                          <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> quote:
                          To me, the key difference between this situation and the other is this: We've publicly apologized; we've agree that we went overboard in our silliness; we've promised to behave better.


                          It just seems that with some people, there just is no willingness to comprimise.<pre class="ip-ubbcode-code-pre"> </pre><HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

                          Umm, hello? rockstarr and Mini are no longer members here, and thus can't very easily apologize, nor can Colin. I'm not saying they had any intentions of apologizing, but it's hardly fair to say that there was no willingness to compromise.



                          • #73
                            Well, I for one, am willing to compromise. Let's agree to disagree.


                            • #74
                              Fair enough.

                              The opinions expressed in this post are not neccessarily the views of this poster.~
                              ~This is *way* more fun than doing something productive~


                              • Original Poster

                                <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Umm, hello? rockstarr and Mini are no longer members here, and thus can't very easily apologize, nor can Colin. I'm not saying they had any intentions of apologizing, but it's hardly fair to say that there was no willingness to compromise <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

                                Emma, Colin has banned before, apologized and been allowed back. Rockstarr and Miniwelsh protested the principles of the most recent outburst and chose to bring up their grievances in a way that, unfortunately, threw acid in the face of the moderating body.

                                I, along with many, agreed with the basic tenet that Colin brought up two months ago but in no way went along with the blatantly hurtful and cruel method that was chosen to bring the subject up.

                                Colin stated repeatedly (albeit too little, too late) that Aiden was NOT the issue.

                                I used to believe in Blind Faith but then Clapton left the band.

                                Friendship is Love without his wings
                                -Lord Byron
                                "If you would have only one day to live, you should spend at least half of it in the saddle."


                                • #76
                                  Very nice ETBW... very nice. In full agreeal (yes, I just made up a word, try it sometime, it will brighten your day!)


                                  "The tongue weighs less than an ounce but few have the strength to hold it."

                                  "Fool me once, shame, shame on you, fool me twi, you, you can't fool me again."
                                  ~ Sad day for us Republicans
                                  \"Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag and begin slitting throats.\"

                                  \"Betwixt the stirrup and the ground, mercy I asked and mercy I found.\"


                                  • #77
                                    I'm not saying that Aiden himself is an issue, but because what rockstarr and Miniwelsh originally protested (if anyone doesn't remember) is that Aiden threads were OT. The Mods decided that Aiden threads would be allowed. Fine. I just don't understand why people can't just be happy that they were granted permission to discuss the Aiden situation. People feel the need to act like Miniwelsh and rockstarr are lobbying to have everyone's inalienable rights taken away.



                                    • #78
                                      Emma - please accept that the decisions of the Administrator and to some extent the Moderators are NOT up for a vote and move on.

                                      I am not going to try to justify the decisions. You are not going to change the decisions by whining about them.

                                      Thank you all for trying to understand what we are trying to do. Now please let the past go.
                                      Mal:This is the Captain. We have a little problem with our entry sequence, so we may experience some slight turbulence and then .... explode


                                      • #79
                                        And I don't understand why you just won't let it go, Emma.

                                        Edited to say: SoEasy, looks like we posted at the same time.


                                        • #80
                                          ETBW, I really admire the way you can offer advice in such a polite, non accusatory manner. I really wish I had your tact!

                                          Oh yes. I've been guilty of a couple BB "no no's." But I appreciate the wonderful tone and content of your advice.

                                          Can you come to my office and give my boss a couple pointers?