How To Help A Friend..

[goeslikestink]

you know eqt i re read what you posted
read what you put slowly see if you can see another angle as i just did

ot might not be the horses, sometimes as you very well know some people think its the horse
when in truth its themselves
sub concious thing can play an important part to how one thinks when they dwell on stuff
or think to much so the goals that they aim for are to high so they talk themselves out of doing things or blame things becuase they have talked themsleves out of it hope that made sense

just quote you for a minute

one of my very good friends has come to the conclusion (rightfully so) that her horse really does not like to do dressage. And she really does.


in what context does she like dressage to watch to do or to perfrom

dressage is schooling a horse -- i know you know that - iwill add you say your freind has come to the conclusion - your not with her 24/7 and watch her everymove only when your there i pressume so for exsample if she cant get a movement right or its not performed to a standard then one will automatically say my horse dont like dressage but i do rather than balme themselves always the horses fault not saying it is just a thery as in might be-- our sub concious minds also give vibes transmitted to the horse so we can block them into doing things if we are say worried about a task - that can be anything in gerneral

then there is bit-- She bred this horse and will never sell him. She owns his sister and she doesn't care to do dressage any more than he does..

that has a more than one meaning didnt realise till i read it again

and i think this is a key -- as to how your matey thinks or feels so blocking herself

a few little sernerio - can slap me later ok but imagine if like your matey a perosn bred a horse to do dressage put a mare to a decent stallion and bred a fal thinking yeah i will have the horse of me dreams to do dressage or whatever dispiline

or the horse was bred and already done or part done as i dont what age she had them from as a dressage potential and she paid good money
and liked what she saw and hopfully gooing have the horse of dreams



perhaps they didnt come up to her expectations and werent what she was sold
or told a fib or she bred them them told everyone shes got lalala or blah blah

but cant perfrom or make them do things inwhich case its could be an embrassment to her in which case -- blames the horses as cant do or wont to dreesage or not really interested
in dressage so shes stuck with 2 horses
or

her aim and goals are so high - as idol type wnana be like so and so
but is lower keyed or average rider which this i think is more to the point perhaps
and this is where she thinks to much and blocks her horses so they cant perform whatecer it is she trying to do

1- horses should be riden between leg and hand but if the hands are to heavy then the horse isnt going to peform xyz - you might need to look at her hands and also see if shes riding from an independant seat and light secure leg

2- horses are funny creatures they pick up on any vibe- this is where i think the problem is
horses have all there senses where we only use ours when something gone or missing
ie limb we use the other sight we use tatse and smell etc

horses and animals have all there senses so can pick up a vibe
if she cconstantly thinking my horses cant do dressage then shes sub conciously telling them that-- so they get as CANT


quote the same thing
She bred this horse and will never sell him. She owns his sister and she doesn't care to do dressage any more than he does..

also read the nexxt bit of your post sounds like maties given up as all in becuase shes afraid of getting old -- like isaid i think the perosn lack self confindence in a whole range of things which has spilled over into the horse and there way of going goodluck

if one dont work try another -- break that sentence down
she doesnt care to do dressage any more than she does-- what type of education she giving them really id the horses dont care -- more likely rider issues

perhaps you should work on her confident as they can do it rather than they cant do it
i think you need to work on your mates confindence and not let her think to much of what she cant do but more in what she can do
encourage her by giving her the support and everything she does praze her up the anti on your mate in time her confindence will grow and her horses will perform asthey get there Q's from the rider and there confidence

try a different angle and be assertive with your mate and if she cant do something dont have a go at her but try a diffferent way - there are three personalities going on when you teach you the rider and the horse

re the next bit of your post- sounds like she given up and afraid to get old i think your mate has confindent issues in all sorts of things that have spilled over into the horse which effect there way of going that or shes trying to hard- so stressed out either way she needs to relax and enjoy and take it as it is that is life as in each day as it coomes no one should work harder than the horses

[Posting Trot]

The book True Horsemanship through Feel by Bill Dorrance and Leslie Diamond might be an interesting read for her. Bill Dorrance was in his 90s when the book came out (he has since died, I believe). He had gotten the horse he's pictured as riding in the book (in his 90s) only a couple of years before.

Beauty (Beaut) was an OTTB who had flunked out of polo training; her owners were going to put her down but ended up giving her away and Dorrance eventually got her. He basically had to restart her to deal with some of the bad habit she'd picked up on the way.

He worked with Beaut on the principle that she was a horse that needed a trainer, and he was a trainer who needed a horse. He says somewhere in the book that he knows (hopes) that Beaut will outlive him, and so it's important that he do a good job with her so that someones else will take her on.