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Tips for Dealing With Rowdy Kids @ Barn?

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  • #21
    I'd also mention to the BO/BM the possibility that if she doesn't deal with the situation and one of these little unsupervised he!!ions causes my horse to spook while I'm riding and I fall and get hurt, I'll be suing her and the parents.

    The American 'child centric' home of the last several decades has just handed us a whole generation of unruly brats with no respect for authority, boundaries, or consequences.
    Lowly Farm Hand with Delusions of Barn Biddieom.
    Witherun Farm
    http://witherun-farm.blogspot.com/

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    • #22
      I can't get over the BO or BM aren't doing anything to get this under control. Things happen when folks are being safe. When you have kids running and yelling someone is going to get hurt sooner or later.

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      • #23
        Euthanasia.
        ... _. ._ .._. .._

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        • #24
          Originally posted by Equibrit View Post
          Euthanasia.
          I agree!!!

          Comment


          • #25
            All else fails lock them in a stall. Works every time, but mom may get pissed.

            Comment


            • #26
              Originally posted by equineartworks View Post

              Don't most barns have a "no unattended children" policy?!??!?!?

              I am sure you can pick up kittens and puppies by the gross along the way with little extra effort...

              Comment


              • #27
                I take my 9yo son to the barn and he helps me gather my gear and get Ti ready. If I am in the arena alone, he is allowed into the ring while I ride. The moment someone else shows up, he goes into the viewing lounge, for his safety and that of other riders. (Titus is cool with his antics, even when he jumps crossrails!)
                I would never imagine just leaving my kid at a barn as if board entitled me to child care!!!! At my former barn, where most of the teenagers knew and likes Nate they'd watch him, informally sometimes but he knew that if the kids had a project, he went in the lounge.
                If he does misbehave, run or act up, I have no issue with his being corrected by an adult.

                I think the OP needs to enlist the owner or manager. Remind them of liability issues especially where the parent LEAVES them. Unless kids are there with a purpose (to ride, take a lesson, clean tack etc) they should be supervised. The BO/M is not there to supervise them.
                F O.B
                Resident racing historian ~~~ Re-riders Clique
                Founder of the Mighty Thoroughbred Clique

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                • #28
                  Originally posted by Katy9532 View Post
                  All else fails lock them in a stall. Works every time, but mom may get pissed.
                  I was going to say this as well. I have definitely done it!
                  "The standard you walk by is the standard you accept."--Lt. Gen. David Morrison, Austalian Army Chief

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                  • #29
                    Originally posted by Bootylicious Alter View Post
                    The barn management is sympathetic, but will probably not do anything. Please share some diplomatic ways to deal with this problem. How do I address these children? How do I address their mothers? What are effective things to say to the kids to make them ignore/avoid me?
                    I'd initially follow the usual dealing-with-miscreant-parents routine:
                    1) In a pleasant but not particularly warm way, point out the dangers of the situation.
                    2) If parent seems receptive/apologetic, warm up slightly and discuss how they can keep their children safe and happy.
                    3) If the parent seems hostile/defensive, break off communications in mildly disappointed way.
                    4) If #3, point out problem to BO and rest happy knowing you've made the effort.
                    5) If #3 and #4, go directly to the kid for a conversation.

                    At this stage, you may have to study the kids. Some kids will respect a nice, normal, request from an adult, and maybe these kids will - probably everyone's avoided even trying this much in hopes that the parents would take care of it. Some kids, though, won't, which is where it gets fun. You have to decide if a bratty kid is the sort who will avoid you if you become the Evil Bitch, or the sort who will then make it his/her mission in life to goad you in hopes of seeing the Evil Bitch emerge. If your goal is simply to get the kids to give you a wide berth, you have to calculate how they'll react to different approaches.

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                    • #30
                      It never ceases to amaze me how a parent can ignore their own child's antics...at the expense of others.....I have said this before on another thread, but not all parents come to the game equiped to turn decent human beings who are aware of their actions out into the world....Some are overstressed....some are self absorbed.....some figure the guardian angels will watch over their children....and some just don't worry about anything until the child gets hurt......

                      That said, I have found the most obnoxious are also the most needy.....They are the kids that are screaming for attention any way that they can get it....

                      We had a boarder at the barn I am at now....It is mostly filled with adults, but one of the adults had 3 children, the middle child had some sort of disability ( I never knew exactly what it was )...She was a newbie owner and always brought her youngest child ( around 7 ) and this horse was the mom's thing she was doing for herself.....This girl would prance around and want to "help" me....Fortunately my guy is a saint and I found giving her a little direction about how to do things safely and being firm in what she could and couldn't do she would actually listen to me and calmed her bad self down a bit.....After I met the Dad one day it all became crystal clear to me.....This guy went on and on about the wonderfulness of his oldest son and his athletic prowess.....It was clear the mom was just worn out when she would attempt to chastise said child for "talking too much".....This kid was a bother to everyone, and she knew it....Sad, actually.....

                      In any event, they moved to another barn after a few months and a collective sigh was heard from all......

                      Sorry, I know this probably doesn't help you much, but know that it is something pretty prevalent in today's world....The truth is the only way this will be remedied is if the one with authority ( BO/BM ) enforces proper behavior.....
                      Crayola Posse: Mulberry

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                      • #31
                        Originally posted by War Admiral View Post
                        I was going to say this as well. I have definitely done it!
                        Me too that is how I know it works so well!

                        Comment


                        • #32
                          I was going to suggest locking them in a stall as well. I've done it to dogs that were much more pleasant than a screaming kid. I wouldn't be above giving a good swift kick (from me) when mom wasn't looking, either. Pull hair, scratch out eyes, maybe I'd "accidentally" spill some Koppertox all over the kid and say it was unavoidable; he almost knocked me down.


                          I'd speak to the BO/BM immediately. Because of the liability issues, they should be all over it, and fast. If they are somehow unconcerned, I think the suggestion someone made about YOU telling them you'd sue is brilliant. It should light a fire under their ass. If all that fails, safety is obviously a very low priority, and I'd let them know I'd be leaving because I'm too afraid that I'd be sued in the event my horse hurt a kid that's underfoot and shouldn't be.

                          Comment


                          • #33
                            I agree that the BO/BM needs to speak to the moms first, because it's a liability issue for them and it's a liability issue for their other boarders. One boarder at my barn brought her two small children once and then let them roam freely while she was in the arena with her horse. The BO told her in his very polite, soft-spoken way that they were going to be put in a stall in about thirty seconds if they were not contained elsewhere.

                            I don't mind horse kids; I was the seven-year-old horse crazy child once, running around my neighbour's corral begging to groom or feed carrots or even clean the run-in. Horse kids are different from unattended random children. I am also okay with correcting someone else's child, but maybe that's because I'm a teacher and have trouble switching that part of me off when I go home. Unattended small fiends at a barn can get seriously injured or killed, or do serious damage to horses, people and property.
                            "Remain relentlessly cheerful."

                            Graphite/Pastel Portraits

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                            • #34
                              Originally posted by Bootylicious Alter View Post
                              Their parents are busy riding or sometimes they leave the barn and leave the kids behind for part of the afternoon.
                              Whoa ho ho.....the Farm Insurance agent needs a little phone call on this one.

                              As far as the behavior, I myself would have no problems telling the sweethearts that they need to stop it. Younger 4- 8 year olds....say "let's go find your mommy and stay with her"...and then take them by their hand and give the child to her. Sweetly tell mommy that her baby almost got kicked in the head/bit by the dog/sliced by the harrow/crushed by a stall door/electrocuted/whatever..make it really juicy.

                              If these are older 9-14 year olds....tell them flatly to knock the crap off and either go clean tack or sit outside.

                              Forget about hurting feelings, your check's getting cashed too, isn't it? You have every right to use the facility.

                              Comment


                              • #35
                                Well most of the barns around my area always had a "no unsupervised kids under 13" rule. That would at least clear up the leaving the munchkins behind for the horses to babysit...

                                Then if the BM/BO is too wishy washy to lay down the law, offer to hold a "camp" and teach the kids barn etiquette and horse safety. Education does help. The kids will start looking out for each other,if they really are just kids with too much energy. If they are little hellions...well then you need a goat or a mule to kick their little behinds... often
                                Strong promoter of READING the entire post before responding.

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                                • #36
                                  Wow. I would never ever ever in a million years consider riding while my 3.5 year old DD was at the barn with me. Just would not do it. She does like to come out and see the animals and help brush my horse, and he's very cool with having her around. She's also not loud or obnoxious, and the BO has said she's welcome any time.

                                  If the barn management won't act, then I agree with the locking the little brats in a stall solution. The first time you can be nice and make it a clean stall. If a second time is needed use a dirty one.

                                  Putting them to work or educating them is also an option, except the OP stated that these kids are not interested in horses or riding. Since they're bored and unsupervised, they're getting into trouble.

                                  Comment


                                  • #37
                                    There used to be a boarder at my barn who had a son that just ran wild. . .even when she was sitting around having chat-time with her buddies and she could plainly see that he was doing something he shouldn't.

                                    I still had my Rottweiler at the time. . .great barn dog, great horse dog, loved people. However, the little boy started following my dog around telling him "go away!" over and over. My dog just ignored the kid and was walking away from him, but then I saw the kid actually walk up and shove my dog's hips sideways. I was in front of that kid in a split second, looked him straight in the eye and said "that dog does not want to play with you. Leave him alone." The same old quiet, authoritative voice that he obviously never heard at home was more than enough to put a halt on that behavior.

                                    Later, while the mom was out riding and the BM was left to "babysit," I overheard the BM ask the kid if he knew how to hog-tie. The BM is a bit of a character, and sure enough -- when I walked out of the barn, I saw the kid sitting on the ground with his legs tied together. . .and hooked to one of the ties on the hitching post. The BM was just sitting on the porch, looking smug and smoking a cigarette. It's actually a very kid-friendly barn, they just have interesting ways of dealing with the unfriendly kids.

                                    In the OP's case. . .this is definitely something that needs to be brought to the attention of the BO/BM. And not in a "ho-hum, if you ever get around to it. . ." kind of way. The parents who overlook their child's bad behavior or expect the rest of the world to drop everything and offer free childcare. . .those are the same parents who are quick to sue everyone within a 10 mile radius when something happens to their child. And if your barn gets sued, and has to pay up, it WILL most likely have an impact on you and the other boarders.
                                    Please copy and paste this to your signature if you know someone, or have been affected by someone who needs a smack upside the head. Lets raise awareness.

                                    Comment


                                    • #38
                                      At current barn the only children that are ever there are BM and BO's. As long as they aren't doing something totally destructive, I don't worry about them. One day I was riding in the ring and BM's son came in the ring to play. He was climbing on the fence and then jumping off with hey watch me! Then he started climbing on the jumps and walking across the top of them(he's 7yo). I was laughing at him and giving him tips on how to stay balanced to make it across. I did stop and talk to him and asked him if he knew that he couldn't do that when other people were there and he said yes cause the other horses are stupid. Made me chuckle and kind of pleased that my horse was sensible enough to not pay any mind to a child playing.

                                      Comment


                                      • #39
                                        Originally posted by Bootylicious Alter View Post
                                        Posting under an alter so I don't hurt any feelings.

                                        There are several new, unsupervised kids at my barn. They belong to boarders who moved in this winter. Their parents are busy riding or sometimes they leave the barn and leave the kids behind for part of the afternoon.

                                        The kids are running in the barn, yelling, picking up items that do not belong to them, walking and standing too close to horses who are not used to kids, etc. When confronted, their mothers roll their eyes about the kids' misbehavior and give empty promises about how they will tell the kids to behave.

                                        I love my barn. I don't want to move my horse. My barn used to be pretty quiet and it runs itself with little intervention from management. I don't mind spending time with kids who love horses and want to learn more, but these kids are just bored and have little interest in horses and are full of energy.

                                        I would like to avoid these kids for the safety of me, my horse, and these children. The barn management is sympathetic, but will probably not do anything.

                                        Please share some diplomatic ways to deal with this problem. How do I address these children? How do I address their mothers? What are effective things to say to the kids to make them ignore/avoid me? It seems like some people are far more casual about kids in barns and I just don't want to be involved with any of them if I can help it.

                                        Thank you for listening and for any ideas you have.
                                        go to the barn owner and express your worries
                                        barns and yards arnt playgrounds they have horses in them and unruly kids can cause accidents which comes under the health and safety act

                                        kids should not be unsupervised under the age of 16yrs old
                                        there should be an adult with them at all times

                                        unrly kids can cause problems
                                        once yonks ago top yard lady ahd a client with 2 unruly boys when i went up to use indoor school i found them as i pass the straw loft to get to the indoor smoking

                                        i didnt bother telling them of as i wanted them to be cuaght so i went the other way staright upto b/o door and knock and told her

                                        they were evicted = as its against the rules to smoke in the yard
                                        they were 12

                                        the childs mother got the third degree since then a new rule went up no children to be unsupervvised at any time

                                        kids do things if unruly its down to bad parenting which puts every one in the yard at risk

                                        your a paying client - and have every right to complain
                                        for you as they take and move things this also can beocme a hazzard if the ailses
                                        are not kept clear from junk in case of a fire
                                        or that in case of a fire things are moved and you cant find them to get your horses out ie head collars maybe

                                        go to the barn owner and raise you views and the reasons why
                                        she must comply to have a rule that no children should be left un attended
                                        surposing an accident happened and child got kicked or bit she s liable
                                        make her/him aware of that she can be sued for just letting do things

                                        like i saiid its a business and a yard and surposed to professonials

                                        professional yards have proper rules and liablity insurances and are well run

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                                        • #40
                                          Just reading this makes me want to go find a child to yell at. No offense, but I have no tolerance. It's probably from the way I was brought up: my Mom expected me to behave at ALL TIMES, and I did. If I didn't, woe onto me, and truly it was my own damn fault.

                                          When I was giving lessons and everything that goes along with that, I had no patience for that crap. I was talking to a parent one time, and one of the kid's younger non-riding sibling came up and started tugging on the mom's shirt and saying "mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy mommy." NO seriously, just like that. The mom was ignoring the kid and I went nutty. I bent down, grabbed the kid's arms and said, "Your Mom and I are talking, and YOU are being VERY RUDE! You WILL wait until we are done talking, do you UNDERSTAND ME???" The kid was all google-eyed at me, and waited. The mom actually THANKED me with an eye roll. Where's the fruitbat? Why didn't the mom do what I did? ARGH!

                                          Yeah. I was and am a hardass about rules. Serves me well now .
                                          COTH's official mini-donk enabler

                                          "I am all for reaching out, but in some situations it needs to be done with a rolled up news paper." Alagirl

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