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What a morning

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  • What a morning

    This morning I decide to maybe sleep in a little later after I feed and turnout the horses, so I just put my winter gear over my pjs and go outside. I feed and notice the horses on one side of the barn are riled up about something but it's still dark outside so I can't tell what it is. The mare starts getting pretty excited (she's 20 and lazy, so I know something odd is up) running up and down the fenceline between her pasture and the property next door. There is a huge line of pines between the two properties so I still can't see what's going on. I walk over and in the trees trying to make sweet love to my mare is my neighbors Quarter Horse stallion! This is the second time in 6 months that he's gotten loose and I know the reason-his fencing consists of some sort of cord that is the size and flexibility of an extension cord "reinforced" with intermittently working electric fencing. Frickin great.
    I don't consider myself enough of a horseman to handle stallions, especially one ready to go(so to speak) so now what do I do? Run back to barn, get halter, rope and bucket of grain and hope this works. Back to stallion, who by this time has determined that my mare is in heat(mare also wildly confirming this)-there's no way he's gonna let me halter him. He also decides it would be a great idea to pasture breed my mare-never mind that my pvc fence is between them! Sh$t Sh$t Sh$t what to do- this is going south in a hurry. Run into the mare's pasture and decide to halter her and lock her back in the barn. Well, this is the closest chance for a "date" since her last foal 7 years ago(and it was AI, so does that even count as a date?) and she's not letting this hot young stud out of her sight. After much discussion, I finally lock her in the barn. She's now screaming her displeasure at my decision and I still have a loose stud to contend with. I finallly get him haltered(did I mention I don't handle stallions?) and now have to get him back to the neighbors. I can't walk him along the road because the traffic is horrible so I have to bring him through 3 gates on my property to get to the fields to lead him back. He's not too happy that I ruined his romantic interlude but at least he's not acting dangerous. Get him through the fields to the neighbor's, mentally rehearsing what I'm going call her for her poor horsekeeping skills. Get through 2 more gates on her property and decide to put him in a stall in her big center aisle barn because at least I know that is well built. Open the sliding door a bit and it looks like she has some sort of equipment in the aisle- ok, maybe we can walk around it-open the door more...it's a frickin HUGE FIRE TRUCK!!! WTF???!!! Great,just great. Walk through 2 more gates to get to the other barn but it has crappy electric fencing and it looked like another nightmare to get him in by myself so I walk to her front door. Of course, she has a concrete front porch too wide to safely hold the horse and simultaneously ring the doorbell. But then, I have no other option. So now I am straddling the porch, holding a stallion in one hand and trying to ring the doorbell with the other, all the while fully knowing that this horse could spin and I'd be SOL. Luckily, he was well behaved and the neighbor answers the door acting all shocked that her horse got loose-c'mon lady-have you seen your fencing?!! "Oh, the electric fence must not be working"-thanks for that, Captain Obvious-what gave it away? Told her how she REALLY needs better fencing and I walk back to my farm, still thinking at least the stud had a good mind..but God, what would the foal be like-mare evented, stallion did reining. Great- I'd have a small muscle bound (both parents on the more muscled side) horse that could stop and spin on a dime when it refused a fence!!!Geez...

  • #2
    Thanks for a good laugh! I know it probably was not very funny while it was happening, but the way you told the story was pretty histerical.
    There are friends and faces that may be forgotten, but there are horses that never will be. - Andy Adams


    • #3
      OMG, that is sooooo funny!

      As someone who does late night checks in her robe with winter gear over top, I too, am not equipped for those type of emergencies!

      Your description of your "foal to be" was pricelss!

      COTH, keeping popcorn growers in business for years.

      "I need your grace to remind me to find my own." Snow Patrol-Chasing Cars. This line reminds me why I have horses.


      • #4
        Originally posted by Equilibrium View Post
        OMG, that is sooooo funny!

        As someone who does late night checks in her robe with winter gear over top, I too, am not equipped for those type of emergencies!

        Your description of your "foal to be" was pricelss!

        And yet, all these type of emergencies always seem to happen when I'm dressed in that way! At least in the winter I have coveralls to go on top - in the summer my pjs are on full display.
        ~ A true friend knows all there is to know about you and still likes you. -E. Hubbard


        • #5
          Too bad we won't be seeing pics of the foal.

          Doesn't it always seem to happen when we're in our jammies??
          Lowly Farm Hand with Delusions of Barn Biddieom.
          Witherun Farm


          • #6
            Now that was a great story!! I can relate to retrieving a stallion in jammies, but it was MY OWN STALLION!! Last winter he escaped who knows how many times (I stopped counting) as my electric fencer wasn't working cause of the frozen ground.

            And now you can handle stallions!! Way to go! They're not all fire breathing dragons even when in the mood, mine included.

            Description of the foal was priceless.

            Enjoy the rest of your day.
            A Merrick N Dream Farm
            Proud Member of "Someone Special to me serves in the Military" Clique


            • #7
              So, AMD, having read what a hassle and danger it is for the OP to be put in that situation by a neighbor with non-effective stallion fencing, perhaps you could share what you've switched to in order to fix the problem.
              That way OP's got some on-hand advice for her neighbors.
              To have a right to do a thing is not at all the same as to be right in doing it. - GK Chesterton


              • #8
                What an interesting morning you had. I think feeding in PJ's almost guarantees some kind of "excitement" beyond the usual routine but you handled it well and now you're an experienced stallion handler too.


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Rev View Post
                  So, AMD, having read what a hassle and danger it is for the OP to be put in that situation by a neighbor with non-effective stallion fencing, perhaps you could share what you've switched to in order to fix the problem.
                  That way OP's got some on-hand advice for her neighbors.
                  I have no other horse people around me. I simply had to wait until the ground thawed out so my ground rod would work more effectively. BUT, I repaired that fence more times than he got out because of deer taking it down and then reinforced the areas he kept getting out of by doing a double strand w/ t-posts. I also used rope (I know, but it was winter and ground frozen) higher than the fence to keep him away from it and it wouldn't break when the deer hit it. Not real pretty, but nobody could see it way in the back.

                  In his defense, it was his first winter being all alone and he got bored. Now he's w/ his girls and is much happier and hasn't gotten out since then.
                  A Merrick N Dream Farm
                  Proud Member of "Someone Special to me serves in the Military" Clique


                  • #10
                    I would tell your neighbor that the next time Mr. Stud Muffin comes visiting, he will be returned as Mr. Gelding Muffin . That usually provides the inspiration for people to fix their fences!
                    Follow us on facebook - https://www.facebook.com/pages/River...ref=ts&fref=ts


                    • #11
                      That is why our mothers always told us to wear clean underwear!


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by JRG View Post
                        That is why our mothers always told us to wear clean underwear!


                        loved the cute foal desciption


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by NoDQhere View Post
                          I would tell your neighbor that the next time Mr. Stud Muffin comes visiting, he will be returned as Mr. Gelding Muffin . That usually provides the inspiration for people to fix their fences!
                          My thoughts exactly! Or tell her you sit on the back porch with a shotgun, a la father of a teenage girl on a date.

                          You know the only way to avoid excitement like this is to get fully dressed before you leave the house.


                          • #14
                            You have a gift for writing amusingly. What a funny story, although I know it was not funny at the time. I think I might tell the neighbor that I had a syringe of depo-provera handy to give her stud if he comes to visit the next time. Or a cattle prod.


                            • #15
                              What a great story!

                              Right after we moved here, my horse decided to jump out of his 5 foot fence and go meet the neighbors. I ran up and down the road looking for him in my nightgown and clogs. Never thought I could run so fast in clogs. When I found him, I yelled at him and he turned around and ran back home but did not jump back in. What an eejit he is.

                              Then, my doctor tried a new sleeping med on me and it gave me hallucinations. I dreamed that the horses were running on the porch. Got up, ran outside, got on the golfcard and flew all around the farm looking for them. In my nighty, in the middle of winter. Clogs again. I could not figure out WHY they were all in their pastures. Mr. LMEqT finally found me and stuffed me back in my bed. Rinse and repeated this TWICE before I Figured out it was the meds. Doh!
                              "Kindness is free" ~ Eurofoal
                              The CoTH CYA - please consult w/your veterinarian under any and all circumstances.


                              • Original Poster

                                EqTrainer-LMAO(at my age ROF not an option or I would have added that also)
                                The clogs make your story especially funny-I don't care if they're closed back or not- YOU CAN'T RUN IN CLOGS!!!!(Lord knows I've tried!)