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Feeling poopy

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  • #81
    <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Just disgusted.:
    M E M O R A N D U M

    To: Lord Helpus

    From: The Self Appointed Poopiness Police

    Date: 2/5/2004

    Re: Apologies

    -----------------------

    Accepted on behalf of the entire thread. But watch it. Any happiness, or riding comments will be strictly dealt with.

    Signed: The Poopmeister. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

    No, no, no! You must sign as the POOPSMITH !

    LH, I don't know why you get a blank screen. More poopiness for you! But just in case I'm the one who pooped up, here's the link again: Homestar Runner

    Heart in a horse is every bit as important as it is in a person. ~Jimmy Cruise

    Comment


    • #82
      <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by tosca4711:
      My turn

      My present job doesn't pay enough to pay the bills so I'm looking for another.
      Due to the economy, I might not have my present job to tide me over before I find something else.
      I didn't make the short list for a job I really really wanted.
      I can't have the man I want.
      This thread really cheered me up too. I must be a bad person.
      <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

      I feel your pain girl. I know I won't have my job to tide me over - been job hunting since Oct 03 - 4 interviews later - no job - I got my official "pink slip" today.

      Another rotten thing: my neighbor's kitty got hit by a car while I was home during lunch I know, not my kitty, but I still felt bad when I called them. Moved kitty out of the road tho.

      Comment


      • #83
        Awwwwww. pooor kitty. Awwwww. I'm blubbering.

        I lofff kitties.

        (formerly Just Learning (and slowly))
        (formerly Just Learning (and slowly))

        Comment


        • #84
          Oh heck, I'll chime in.

          I'm feeling poopy too.

          My broken arm HURTS today - and moreover it has started swelling again and I don't know what that means...

          Since I broke it and have not been as active as usual, I've put on at least 30 pounds.

          I'm so tired of fighting off rainrot... I get rid of it in one area, horsie gets it in another area... And (whine) I'm doing eeeverything right, disinfecting brushes, etc...

          I don't really like the people at my barn and it is NOT a happy place...

          And I'm having a poopy day at work.

          So there.

          ______________

          "Those who use horses just for the business are crass, classless horsemen."
          --George Morris
          "The standard you walk by is the standard you accept."--Lt. Gen. David Morrison, Austalian Army Chief

          Comment


          • #85
            Ok. Everybody together. Ready?


            <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> Thhhhhhhhhhhhhhbbbbbbbbbbttttt <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

            Harrumph.

            War Admiral. Welcome to the O'weight poopy club thats not your fault its someone elses.

            My fifteen pounds has nothing to do with all the crap I've been stuffing into my face at the speed of light. Nope. It's glands. That's right. My glands stopped working and all this fat just accumulated, like drifting snow.

            It probably came from that rat that said she lost 5 pounds. Lawn something or other? wasn't that her?

            I'm having a horrible day. One thing that did cheer me up though was www.despair.com.
            And by the way, Pokey, I loved two comments you made:

            <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> I have not had a date since 1999. But I did find a great guy that would treat me like a doormat for 6 months. That was fantastic. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

            and

            <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>My friends are takers. I give. They take. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

            Yes. You must be my CO clone.

            (formerly Just Learning (and slowly))
            (formerly Just Learning (and slowly))

            Comment


            • #86
              Glands! Yes! That must be it!! I KNEW it couldn't be those cafe mochas!

              I haven't had a date since 2000 - so don't feel too bad. I guess I'm not only overweight, but homely too!

              Comment


              • #87
                And just in time for Valentine's day:

                <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>



                FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
                Contact: Media Relations
                Email: pr@despair.com
                Web: www.despair.com
                Fax:877-FAILURE

                AUSTIN, TX - January 22nd, 2003 – Despair Inc., the premiere retailer for pessimists worldwide, recently announced the availability of new-and-improved versions of "BitterSweets(tm)", the radical Valentine's Day candy for the dejected and dysfunctional.

                Like the century-old candy "conversation" hearts, BitterSweets are made of chalky-tasting sugar and have no nutritional value whatsoever. But unlike traditional candy hearts, which front romantic sayings like 'BE MINE' and 'KISS ME', BitterSweets are stamped with sour musings and mockeries perfectly suited to the dejected spirits of those who will either spend Valentine's Day alone and miserable, or locked in the soul-crushing clutches of a dysfunctional or co-dependent significant other.


                ABOVE: Introduced in 2002, BitterSweets(tm) candies
                quickly proved enormously popular with
                enormously unpopular people.

                (Image of candies enlarged to reflect scale of pain inflicted.)


                Sporting messages like, 'JUST A FRIEND', 'HE HAS A JOB', 'I MISS MY EX' and 'RETURN MY CDS', BitterSweets provide bitingly humorous reminders of romantic rejections and indignities, allowing lonely and dysfunctional people an opportunity to celebrate the holiday on their own pathetic terms.

                "Lonesome and jilted people aren't just neglected by the people they long to be loved by on Valentine's Day. Sadly, they are also ignored by the thousands of greeting-card publishers, candy and jewelry retailers and florists who focus on selling goods to those who are both in love and eager to demonstrate it through shallow consumption," said Dr. E. L. Kersten, founder and COO. "We believe our BitterSweets are filling a giant void in the marketplace, giving lonely and dysfunctional people a product that speaks to their own desperate plights."

                After a respectful pause, Kersten added, "Our message to these miserable people is simply this: if you have a masochistic sense of humor and a valid credit card number, we will love you this Valentine's Day. Even if no one else will."



                "NEW AND IMPROVED"


                Introduced by Despair Inc. in 2002, BitterSweets proved enormously popular with enormously unpopular people. In the interest of better financially exploiting that sad population in 2003, Kersten directed his product development and marketing teams to join forces to give the candies a "complete Steve Jobsian overhaul" for 2003.

                The "complete Steve Jobsian overhaul" refers to the charismatic Apple Computer founder's patented strategy of combining superficial modifications to an original product with exaggerated and superlative marketing claims to cheaply create the appearance of radical improvements over last year's version of that product. The technique is famous for having secured Apple a less than 5% market share in the personal computing world.

                Superficial modifications to BitterSweets this year include an increase in the total number of designs available - from 15 in 2002 to 37 in 2003. New sayings include, 'SHE COOKS', 'WRITE A POEM', 'UP YER DOSAGE', 'IT FADED', 'KICKED 2 CURB' AND 'C THAT DOOR?'. Another trivial improvement in 2003 was the identification of 6 specific flavors, "Banana Chalk", "Grape Dust", "Citrucel", "You-Call-This-Lime?", "Pink Sand" and "Fossilized Rolaid". (Flavors were unspecified in 2002.) And perhaps least significant of all, the new 2003 BitterSweets label featured an entirely new PMS color and twice as many fonts.

                Beyond these inconsequential changes, company marketing employees also opted to introduce a Valentine's Day Card sampler to compliment any BitterSweets purchase, allowing gift-givers to further personalize the indignity. The 3 card sampler, which retails for $6.95, includes "Dysfunction", "Loneliness" and "Strife" notecards, 3 envelopes and is packaged in a new, black gift box.

                While many unimportant changes have been made to the product for the new year, Dr. Kersten was quick to point out that BitterSweets remained just as nutritious as they had been in 2002.

                Echoing the claims of dozens of candy manufacturers, Kersten declared, "As always, BitterSweets remain a fat-free food."

                After a considered pause, he added a quick adjoinder, "But you won't remain fat-free if you eat too many."

                The candies are available exclusively for purchase through Despair's online store, currently priced at $6.95 per tin. (Pricing may increase as inventories diminish. It's a supply/demand thing.).



                All sales are of proprietary products created by the Company's product development group, Despair Labs. The Company is a direct-to-consumer retailer, selling products via the Internet at despair.com and via its toll-free 877-DESPAIR order line. The company also prints and mails a catalog to its international customer base, provided that they live in the United States.


                customer service - 866-WOEISME

                <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

                (formerly Just Learning (and slowly))
                (formerly Just Learning (and slowly))

                Comment


                • #88
                  I've been feeling a little poopy as well lately...

                  - My job isn't that bad, but the pay sucks. When we get a "raise" it's very, very minimal. My pay + my bf's pay just barely covers the bills. Extra cash? Never. New clothes? Ha!

                  - My MIL just became one of my bosses. I have yet to figure out if this is not so bad, or really bad. Oh, and they decided that it would be a good idea to put her in the office right next to mine.

                  - My cat was at the vet's the day before christmas, racked up a $600 bill and they couldn't even tell us what was wrong. BF wanted to leave the cat there rather than pay the bill(I'm still mad about that!). We can't afford to insure them(3 cats), so now I'm paranoid about one of them getting sick and having another huge vet bill. Bf will likely raise a huge stink if one of them has to go.

                  - So you gathered we're broke. Well now bf has managed to go and break his hand, so he can't work. This is especially fun because now we'll have even less money coming in. Bills just get further & further behind.

                  - I've found the perfect horse for me (yes, this is still poopy!), and I get to go and ride him as often as I like..... for free! Only catch is he's for sale. So every time I go out and have a great ride I can't help but think it could be the last one. I knew he was for sale right from the beginning, so it's not like it's a surprise..... it still sucks though. I never thought that I would click with him as much as I did.

                  - My Dad and my bf can't stand to be in the same room as each other. So as a result I rarely see my Dad, and it's been almost a year since I've seen my 6 year old half sister.

                  - Right before Christmas I was starting to see a buff body. I was working my tail off at the gym and seeing great results. Over Christmas I started slacking, and never got back into it. Had to cancel gym membership to save cash, and I'm starting to feel like a beluga whale. All of the hard work I did before Christmas has all gone down the tubes.

                  That, and I'm always tired. No matter how much sleep I get I could just lay my head down anywhere and sleep. If I have to be at my computer for any extended period of time at work, I start to nod off. I'm tired of being tired.

                  Vent over.... I feel a little better now.

                  I'm off to have a nap.

                  ------------------------------
                  I'm an angel, honest! The horns are just there to keep the halo straight.

                  Comment


                  • #89
                    OK kids ... MY TURN! The weird thing is, I don't really have all that much to feel poopy about, but yet, I still feel POOOOOOOOOOPY Go figure.

                    I can relate entirely to feeling tired all the time -- I can't seem to get enough sleep! Sleep 10 hours a night, and sometimes also take naps! It's a wonder I get anything done.

                    My horse sucks at dressage, my house is a disaster, and my job is boring

                    See, I should be happy I have a job and a horse and house. What's the deal???

                    Oh, and I've even cut back on eating and have been working out, but have lost ZERO pounds. WHY????

                    ACKKKKKKKKKKKK

                    Comment


                    • #90
                      TBeventer, you are not just "tired". You are depressed. There are many things you cannot control in your life, but some you can.

                      Call your dad. Go see your 1/2 sister. She will not be a cute 6 yo for long. Tell your bf he'd better start thinking about the stuff he's going to be selling on eBay while he's not working to help pay the bills.

                      Cutting down on the sugar and increasing your exercise will help fight off the depression (and it costs nothing). You know all the stuff you did at the gym? Do it at home think of it as "practising what your trainer taught you during your lesson."

                      Sorry to hijack the Poopy Thread, but depression should always be addressed. I know. I've been there. Fighting hard not to go there again.

                      Now, I feel poopy because my bank feels that since I won't take a loan out from them, they'll make money off me by slapping charges on my account. GRRRRRRR I ABSOLUTELY HATE BB&T.

                      I also feel poopy because somebody in the neighborhood doesn't feel that keeping their cat indoors is a good thing. Well they don't have to worry anymore, he won't be going home again. I didn't know he was sheltering in one of my outbuildings. You can guess the rest.

                      As to dates ... what are they? It's been so long that I've forgotten how awful 1st ones are Guess it's a good thing that one of my mottos is: A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle!

                      ~Kryswyn~
                      "Always look on the bright side of life, de doo, de doo de doo de doo"
                      ~Kryswyn~ Always look on the bright side of life, de doo, de doo de doo de doo
                      Check out my Kryswyn JRTs on Facebook

                      "Life is merrier with a terrier!"

                      Comment


                      • #91
                        Winter. Winter is to blame. And other people. This is my new mantra- a take on Ayn Rand.

                        I have been obsessively checking various things online- my diminishing bank account, the sales pages for the horses I want but can't afford (another one sold today. Whoopee.) and the still-for-sale-but-not-sold-yet-but-soon-will-be status of my favorite horse at the barn where I ride. Or used to, before winter came and ruined everything. Or was it those Other People who ruined everything? The ones with money to buy the horses I want?

                        Frozen world, no assets, frozen or otherwise, dissertation breathing down my neck like a giant gorilla, and a butt that is getting progressively more flat as I sit here in front of my Desk of Torture- everything stinks. Oh, plus, all of my moaning and whinging has now passed on to my normally even-tempered husband and now he is depressed. We live in the House of Joy.

                        I was thinking of having the bottle of wine my mother-in-law gave us, as part of her Christmas present, for dinner. But it is corked. And I can't get that stupid Led Zep song- "I live in the land of the ice and snow...etc" out of my head. What next, Dolly Parton songs?

                        You can take a line and say it isn't straight- but that wont change its shape. Jets to Brazil
                        You can take a line and say it isn't straight- but that won't change its shape. Jets to Brazil

                        Comment

                        • Original Poster

                          #92
                          The glimmer of hope got stamped out yesterday....had another crappy day at my crappy job.

                          ...Oh wait, did I tell you this?

                          So in July I get pissed off of my crappy job, so I go out and look for new *better* job. I get an interview in August for what *seems* to be a fantastic place. I quite the first crappy job to take the new job, only to find out that this place is run by one of Satan's minions. So what do I do? I call up the original crappy job and ask if they need anyone....I started back the following Monday....

                          It wouldn't have been sooooo bad because my best friend worked there. Yes, I said worked. She decided to go out and get a job she now loves...I am happy for her, but she still sucks and I tell her that every day...hehehe.

                          I hate scraping by, but I mostly hate my extra chin...gotta do something about that....maybe I'll start another topic about weight loss...like a 'Get Moving With Oprah' thing.....

                          Any takers?

                          Comment


                          • #93
                            RodeoHunter I am going to KILL you!

                            As if my head was not already stuffed with too much crap as it is now I have to contend with

                            badgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadger
                            badgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadger
                            mushroomMUSHROOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!

                            which is now starting to sound like

                            poopypoopypoopypoopypoopypoopypoopypoopy
                            poopypoopypoopypoopypoopypoopypoopypoopy
                            doodoodooDOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

                            If that ain't poop what is?

                            OK, me and the Grumpy Old Man had actually gotten on a roll before Christmas. I mean, we actually started to resemble being good, or a reasonable facsimile thereof. Since Christmas, we tried to schedule one lesson, which turned out to be one of the few do-able days in January and I ended up having to go to a funeral. At least it was a nice day for a funeral. Reschedule for the next available day--get there and its so bloody cold trainer doesn't feel like standing out there and I can't blame him (no indoor). Try to ride some in the cold and decide it's not worth it. Finally get in a couple of days that are above freezing, including yesterday. I get there in time to have to share the ring with a lesson. No biggie, we can work on stuff and manage to avoid Lesson Kid. Trainer asks how we are doing and I say Grumpy Old Man and I have lost our roll and trainer says we all do sometimes and I say I'm afraid of getting stuck like this for the rest of my life. Do the line of 2 two foot jumps--Lesson Kid's Mom says "that looks great"--I love Lesson Kid's Mom. Get cocky and go back the other way, whereopon Grumpy Old Man and I both manage to forget everything we have ever learned in our lives and give Lesson Kid's Mom a heart attack. I say to trainer, "you did not see that." and he said "yes I did" and I said "no you didn't" and he said "yes I did, now go back and do it again." Lesson Kid gets a breather, I get a very nice freebie mini-lesson, Lesson Kid's Mom recovers from heart attack, everything is fine and dandy.

                            But to keep this Poop Related, the fine and dandy was short lived. The nasty little ice balls were off to a good start by the time I left the office. Mr. Scootie had an appointment in town, he has no problem with driving on ice, execept sometimes I think he gets a little overconfident. So while I am merrily worrying away, my daughter's step dad (where she is staying) calls and says the interior lights in Scootie Jr.'s car are stuck on and they can't get the things apart to take out the light bulbs. Stepdad is sweet but notoriously mechanically challenged. The car mechanic next door goes to bed with the birdies, so he is of no use. I'm not driving out there in this mess, even if there was anything I could do they haven't already tried. Stepdad says he could give her a jump start in the morning, but it still will need to be fixed. Scootie Jr. hollers from the other room don't worry about it, I don't have classes on Friday, forget about it we'll take care of it tomorrow. Mr. Scootie gets in and I tell him Scootie Jr.'s battery is dying because they can't get the interior lights to go off. Mr. Scootie starts asking a gazillion questions about why they can't get into it and remove the light bulb. Like I have ever felt the need to closely examine the lights inside that old car. JEEEZ, what do you think I am a psychic?

                            So now, the ice balls keep falling and the roads are getting dangerous while Scootie Jr.'s car battery slowly passes out. Then its gonna rain tomorrow--I have to go into town for an appontment in the morning but it sounds like no riding (again!) afterward. Oh, yeah, and the agency I work for is cutting vital services to our clients AGAIN! and Mr. Scootie promised to make space in the fridge for the big pot of leftover soup I made him and this morning it was still on the stove. And I have a cramp in my leg and my arm hurts (referred pain from an old rotator cuff tear), and my cat looks like she is developing some kind of skin problem so the vet can get some more of our money, and MY dog loves Mr. Scootie more than she loves ME, and I wish I could have a bit of cheeze to go along with this whine.....

                            "A snake! It's a sna-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-ke!"

                            Founder and president of the No-Legged Rider Clique
                            Snap Dragon's mom.

                            Comment


                            • #94
                              Well, now I REALLY feel poopy. I made a post about the pmu mares on the EMG board, and got a really nasty attack, with someone claiming they were treated like an idiot, when they cam eot help for a day, with the mares. I have close to thirty years of dealing with difficult horses. So if you have been in a riding school for half a year, and I see you about to do something that isn't safe, I will tell you. I don't think that's treating you like an idiot. If you claim to have made a donation, when you haven't, I think that is really poopy, especially if you say you were'nt thanked for the non-existent donation! so now, I'm really upset, and I just got back from an OFA meeting, where we discussed the BSE crisis with our member of parliament. One of our members sold a 1600 pound cow, at the regular sale this week, he got, are you ready for this? $4.27 for her. Not per pound, that was the total, for a 2 yr. old 1600lb cow! And, it's snowing again. I'm going to go and punch the wall, now.
                              And to make everybody really happy, I gained back my 5 pounds.

                              less hard work, more fine dining.
                              www.dancinglawnhorses.com updated Dec. 29/03

                              If guys can do it, how hard can it be?

                              LESS HARD WORK, MORE FINE DINING!™
                              complicate, obfuscate, prevaricate.

                              Comment


                              • #95
                                <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> And to make everybody really happy, I gained back my 5 pounds. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

                                YOU GO GIRL!

                                And about the EMG thing.......yeesh....I stopped posting on that board awhile ago. You're doing a great thing helping out those mares.

                                Oh, and Scootie? All I have to say to YOU is



                                badgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerbadgerba dgerbadgerPOOPYPOOOOPY

                                Muahaahaaaaaaaaa.......

                                Poopy Update 06/02/04: It's snowing here. Again. Someone make it stop. And I accidentally slept through an important delivery to my house for my parents and now they're not delivering it again till Wednesday....I'm in biiiiiig trouble......

                                **Member of the Ocularly Challenged Equine Support Group**
                                **Member of the Ocularly Challenged Equine Support Group**

                                Comment


                                • #96
                                  RodeoHunter- you must be Candian...European...? You wrote the date backwards! I've been thinking I may as well be back in Montreal, unenjoying the weather, since at least there I'd have the solace of readily-available imported cheeses that don't have the crap pasteurized out of them.

                                  Today here in Bawlmer it is raining, folks, after snaining all night (snain= snow+rain, we made it up last night). So driving my husband to the train station this morning was like taking the old Volvo wagon ice-skating.

                                  And I thought I'd get some riding in this week. Silly...no, stupid me. I need to clean and oil my saddle, but I am pettishly ignoring it, which guarantees that when I do ride again, I will have forgotten my saddle's Need and it will be all dry and yucky.

                                  Can't get much poopier than snain. Even my Rott mix, who has no nerves below his neck, wont go outside. He is currently esconced on our bed, moping, while the Chow mix, who hates the rain like he hates other dogs, lies beside me, whining softly every few minutes. As for the Akita mix, he blames me for all weather manifestations, and showed his large, fuzzy face only briefly this morning, to give me a "why do you do these things to us as if you hated us?" look, before retiring, grumbling, to his couch throne.

                                  You know it's a bad day when your dogs think you are the cause of it.

                                  Although this is the poopy thread, I sincerely hope that we all survive February without doing bodily harm to others (who are, of course, to blame for all of this). Eyes up, heels down, folks- except for the dressage people. I'm not sure what to say to you, except- dang, your horse has big neck muscles!

                                  You can take a line and say it isn't straight- but that wont change its shape. Jets to Brazil
                                  You can take a line and say it isn't straight- but that won't change its shape. Jets to Brazil

                                  Comment


                                  • #97
                                    M E M O R A N D U M

                                    To: FourSocks

                                    From: The Self Appointed Poopiness Police

                                    Date: Feb 6, 2004

                                    Re: Post at 11:18 AM

                                    -------------------

                                    Please be advised that the PPolice have been alerted that you posted a borderline cheery post. At least it used some suspiciously cheerful words like "sincerely" and "hope." Especially when you said "get some riding in this week."

                                    This is your official first warning. Don't let it happen again. If you are going to post on the Poopy thread, your comments MUST be thoroughly poopy and must hit a minumum of 5 on the poopometer. Yours only scored a 4.8.

                                    Signed: The Poopmeister.

                                    (formerly Just Learning (and slowly))
                                    (formerly Just Learning (and slowly))

                                    Comment


                                    • #98
                                      Damn. I wish it was June!! Is that a Canadian thing or just a wrong thing?

                                      Which leads me to the conclusion.....that June.....being four months away.....may in fact never come.



                                      **Member of the Ocularly Challenged Equine Support Group**
                                      **Member of the Ocularly Challenged Equine Support Group**

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                                      • #99
                                        Does not matter if June comes. The only thing June has that we don't have right now is mud and black flies.

                                        Comment


                                        • Ah, the smell of poop in the morning.

                                          There is nothing like heading into your craptacular job every morning after having to eat crow and compromise all your values to keep said job, just to face the evil 'supervisor on a mission' who all of a sudden thinks she knows much more about your job than you after she admitted to you last week that she had "no idea what you do" (good supervisor, eh?).

                                          To top it off as you raced home from the barn last night with just enough time to catch the new episode of "Friends" you realize you forgot to drop off stuff at a co-worker's home. This makes you late and you get home only to find your roomates stinky wanna-be-boyfriend, whom she doesn't like but can't figure out how to make go away (I say "LEAVE ME THE HE$$ ALONE" should work fine), is sitting in your spot on the couch and watching "Friends"...after he'd been told to not come over.

                                          And not only that, while your previously poopified horse has behaved himself for the past few days, you get asked to be in a wedding and because of the affirmative answer given must drive 2 1/2 hours with three other women you don't know to try on overpriced pieces of godawful fabric passed off as "bridesmaid" dresses," thus missing your Saturday "in the sunshine, outdoors, time to heal from the depressing indoor" ride on said unpoopy horse.

                                          My Pictures: http://community.webshots.com/user/slorugbug
                                          Keith: "Now...let's do something normal fathers and daughters do."
                                          Veronica: "Buy me a pony?"

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