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Boarding woes!

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  • AlexS
    started a topic Boarding woes!

    Boarding woes!

    Many of us grew up with mentors in the horse world, and we learned. Now it seems that so many have moved into the business, that the real horse people have stepped up a notch (as they should) but are now out of my $400 a month budget.
    Most good knowledgeable horse barns are in the $1k a month range, without training. And it seems that the people in my budget are idiots, who won't feed, don't care, won't report health issues.

    I get that you get what you pay for. But geez!

    Went to my barn the other morning to help out with chores, as I didn't have anything going on and felt home bound. We were scraping the bottom of the feed barrel. As I was feeding, my horse got his feed, the others got a handful. Then I felt terrible, but he's my priority.

    I freaked on the BO who bought feed that day - and her attitude is just no big deal. And how dare you make me feel that way, the horses never miss two feeds - wait what? Missing two is not ok, missing one is no big deal. And I have affronted her having a problem with that apparently.

    She just gave me notice to leave, and that's fine, I am out 12/1, yeah I am out as soon as I can.
    My horse ate, and so that's all I should be concerned about.
    The other horses didn't skip a meal as they had hay.
    They only ever miss one meal, she wouldn't let them miss two.

    But I am the problem, she couldn't ride today as her nerves were so shot from my having a problem with this. She puts my calls to voicemail and messages 'there's nothing to talk about'. Well clearly there isn't since she is kicking me out. And that's for the best anyway.

    How would you feel about this, and do you have your own boarding woes.

  • AlexS
    replied
    Originally posted by SonnysMom View Post
    I live near OP and have not been able to figure out what farm she is talking about. Not that I know all the farms in the area but I know a number of them. Plus if the barn ran out of grain it ran out of grain. If the BO kicked OP out she was kicked out. No speculation there. Not like they are parting on great terms anyway.
    It sounds like the OP has an emergency barn if she gets booted quicker or needs a bolt hole for her horse. I would assume that since OP has actual dealing with the BO she has a better feel than we do if she is the type to retaliate against her horse or to kick her out sooner.

    Arapaloosa_lady made it sound like if I Googled "XYZ Farm" to consider boarding there this thread would pop up. It won't.
    Sonny, I also know several people who know you. If you can't figure out where I am, I am pretty safe.
    Besides which, everything I said about the barn is true.

    Leave a comment:


  • TheJenners
    replied
    Glad you found a new barn .

    I have been a BO, BM, and boarder. When I was a BM, the BO would regularly let the barn run out of grain, and it was a horrible feeling. She would then be conspicuously absent from the barn when the boarders noticed... It sucked. When I was a BO, I didn't run the whole "let the grain run out so I can get the 'old' grain out of the bottom" game. Um no. That's what an extra bucket or old supp bucket is for; dump the remaining 10 pounds or 20 pounds of grain in there, dump in new bags, dump 'old' grain on top. Or scoop it out if you have a chest freezer or something. Not hard; smart.

    At my current barn, I'm responsible for my grain and supps. I've run out a couple times, the BM scoops out of hers and then I bring mine out and she takes back her loan. It's happened twice or maybe three times in the 1.5 years I've been there, when I first moved, as I had a hard time getting used to not feeding but still checking grain levels. Duh. I check now and stock pile two to five bags.

    Leave a comment:


  • SonnysMom
    replied
    Originally posted by findeight View Post
    There was enough specific location and personal info about OP given to make it pretty easy to figure it out if somebody wanted to alert the BM she was a cyber star on a horse board. This thread might even come up on Google with a " "barns near Xxx PA" search.

    whatever, just didn't want OP to get booted quicker then need be or the horse to suffer retaliation.
    I live near OP and have not been able to figure out what farm she is talking about. Not that I know all the farms in the area but I know a number of them. Plus if the barn ran out of grain it ran out of grain. If the BO kicked OP out she was kicked out. No speculation there. Not like they are parting on great terms anyway.
    It sounds like the OP has an emergency barn if she gets booted quicker or needs a bolt hole for her horse. I would assume that since OP has actual dealing with the BO she has a better feel than we do if she is the type to retaliate against her horse or to kick her out sooner.

    Arapaloosa_lady made it sound like if I Googled "XYZ Farm" to consider boarding there this thread would pop up. It won't.

    Leave a comment:


  • findeight
    replied
    Originally posted by SonnysMom View Post
    She didn't name the barn so I don't see how it would come up in a Google search.
    There was enough specific location and personal info about OP given to make it pretty easy to figure it out if somebody wanted to alert the BM she was a cyber star on a horse board. This thread might even come up on Google with a " "barns near Xxx PA" search.

    whatever, just didn't want OP to get booted quicker then need be or the horse to suffer retaliation.

    Leave a comment:


  • SonnysMom
    replied
    Originally posted by arapaloosa_lady View Post
    Well, she'll say that to you. That doesn't mean that she wants that phrase spouted about the internet in response to people's Google searches for her barn. I doubt it's in her promotional material . I've always been taught it's unprofessional to spread dirty laundry over the internet .
    She didn't name the barn so I don't see how it would come up in a Google search.

    Leave a comment:


  • arapaloosa_lady
    replied
    Originally posted by AlexS View Post
    BO thinks it's no big deal to miss a feed, and she's open about that, she will straight say it to you. So I am not saying all that much that she wouldn't say herself.
    Well, she'll say that to you. That doesn't mean that she wants that phrase spouted about the internet in response to people's Google searches for her barn. I doubt it's in her promotional material . I've always been taught it's unprofessional to spread dirty laundry over the internet .

    I'm glad to hear you're leaving & you've found a place that better fits your needs. I wish you the best of luck with the new location & your soon-to-be-adopted kid learning how to ride!

    Leave a comment:


  • Abbie.S
    replied
    Originally posted by findeight View Post
    If OP had indicated horse was on daily Meds given in the grain? I am sure the advice would have been different. Although a black and white situation may be easier to deal with, there are lots of shades of grey in reality as well as several sides to every story that don't translate to text. Don't think anybody said NBD, just said it won't kill the horse as long as there is hay and there may be legit reasons.
    I meant it more as a general statement: OP was the only one present to make a stink out of the lack of grain meals, but it's been established that this is most likely a chronic issue given the BO's statement and lax attitude. So OP may not have had meds needing to be administered, but perhaps other horses do/did, in which case it's still a serious issue, whether or not the owner knows about it.

    Leave a comment:


  • findeight
    replied
    Originally posted by Abbie.S View Post
    Late to this party, but something to consider for the "missed meal is NBD" crowd: if a horse is on supplements or, more importantly, medications, that are mixed into grain, and there is no grain....someone is likely missing their meds.

    That I'd be pissed about. If the BO doesn't hand the foresight to make sure grain is on hand, I highly doubt they are fixing a syringe with dissolved meds to ensure my horse is getting them.

    If OP had indicated horse was on daily Meds given in the grain? I am sure the advice would have been different. Although a black and white situation may be easier to deal with, there are lots of shades of grey in reality as well as several sides to every story that don't translate to text. Don't think anybody said NBD, just said it won't kill the horse as long as there is hay and there may be legit reasons.

    Leave a comment:


  • AlexS
    replied
    Originally posted by Zu Zu View Post
    Thanks for posting about your new barn ~ sounds quite nice !


    * just ignore the AP = always pessimistic people aka nasty bullies *


    Jingles & AO for an easy move and smooth transition ~


    Best Wishes for a Happy Holiday Season for you , your horse and your family ~
    Thanks and wishing you a happy Holiday Season to your family too.

    Leave a comment:


  • AlexS
    replied
    Originally posted by californianinkansas View Post
    OP,
    If there was more going on than you have previously disclosed, it would be very helpful if you shared the rest with us, as we can only formulate responses based on the information given to us.

    You may find it beneficial to edit your posts to remove all references to the location of the boarding barn -the horse world is a small one.
    I can't share the other stuff that's going on. I realize that you can only judge based on what I am telling you, but it's personal to the BO, and I won't put her personal life out there like that. It also involves others, so doesn't need to be out there.
    One thing I can tell you, is that she has students who ride. She doesn't care to do barn chores, so has a rule that any minor, has to work off their riding time. That's fine, for her students, if that's her rule, it's her barn. However it applies to the whole barn - I am paying full board, no one HAS to do any chores, and my foster kids certainly won't be doing that if they are riding my horse. That's not an issue now (BO doesn't know that) as I am not permitted to have my kids do a dangerous activity like ice fishing, skiing, or horse riding. But when I take custody of one of my kids, he will be riding. That's a minor thing, I won't share the bigger things, and they are much bigger.

    Thanks to you and others for advise to remove info. I post under my own name. It's not common to have foster kids - those who know me, will know who I am. However most of the people who know me, don't know specifically where I board.
    BO thinks it's no big deal to miss a feed, and she's open about that, she will straight say it to you. So I am not saying all that much that she wouldn't say herself.

    Leave a comment:


  • Zu Zu
    replied
    Thanks for posting your good news update ~ Enjoy your new barn !

    Thanks for posting about your new barn ~ sounds quite nice !


    * just ignore the AP = always pessimistic people aka nasty bullies *


    Jingles & AO for an easy move and smooth transition ~


    Best Wishes for a Happy Holiday Season for you , your horse and your family ~

    Leave a comment:


  • AlexS
    replied
    Originally posted by Lady Counselor View Post
    Seriously, why is anyone worrying about if the OP has foster kids or not? This is why I hate winter; too many people getting too involved in threads like this.
    No kidding. I think I'd notice if I am feeding a family of 7 or 3 this evening, if I can get into my bathroom, or there's a line. And also whether an adoption had been finalized or not. It's not like that's the biggest, most important thing to ever happen in my life or anything! LOL.

    Leave a comment:


  • AlexS
    replied
    Found my new barn today. For those who claim I am low end shopping, it's free choice hay (genuinely, not just said so, as I arrived with 20 mins notice) covered round bales in the pastures, and half a bale remaining in each stall, they'd had more which had been clearly eaten already. Heated water buckets, the barns are both new, large pasture separated to geldings and mares, good solid fencing, and 70x140 indoor arena. Owner is a life long horsewoman, and a former LAPS (large animal protection society officer). $350 a month.

    Throughout this whole thing, I agree I shouldn't have flipped out, and I fully admit that I did. I could have handled it a lot better.

    As far as going into the feed room, it's the tack room too. It's the norm for boarders to help out when they are there. Most will muck their own stalls etc. It's not at all unusual that boarders, or even those taking lessons there will help with chores, which includes feeding. I don't mind that, as it's just a case of people chipping in to help, and the feeds are supervised so everyone is getting what they should (when the grain is there). Because I am not at show barns, it's been about normal for boarders to help with chores if they choose to while they are there. It's not usually expected, but appreciated. I can't commit to doing it daily, but when I am there, I find mucking a stall relaxing. It just depends on the culture of the barn, and they are not all the same.

    Leave a comment:


  • Abbie.S
    replied
    Late to this party, but something to consider for the "missed meal is NBD" crowd: if a horse is on supplements or, more importantly, medications, that are mixed into grain, and there is no grain....someone is likely missing their meds.

    That I'd be pissed about. If the BO doesn't hand the foresight to make sure grain is on hand, I highly doubt they are fixing a syringe with dissolved meds to ensure my horse is getting them.

    Leave a comment:


  • Zu Zu
    replied
    THIS ! exactly ``` Lady Counselor is 'spot on' ~ IMHO ~

    This eactly ~ Lady counselor is 'spot on' here ~ IMHO ~

    Originally posted by Lady Counselor View Post
    Talk about a tempest in a teapot. Seriously, why is anyone worrying about if the OP has foster kids or not? This is why I hate winter; too many people getting too involved in threads like this.

    To stick to the original post; to run out of feed or hay because of unforeseen circumstances, well that's life. To have the person you are paying money to as agreed upon tell you "they never miss more than two meals", that's not acceptable.
    I personally would get my own grain to keep with me and make sure my horse was fed as I made arrangements to leave. No point in flipping out.

    And, as an aside, I hate how everyone hides behind texts and Facebook messages now. Just talk to someone face to face. Then you KNOW they heard you and that you understand the nuances of a conversation.

    Leave a comment:


  • Lady Counselor
    replied
    Talk about a tempest in a teapot. Seriously, why is anyone worrying about if the OP has foster kids or not? This is why I hate winter; too many people getting too involved in threads like this.

    To stick to the original post; to run out of feed or hay because of unforeseen circumstances, well that's life. To have the person you are paying money to as agreed upon tell you "they never miss more than two meals", that's not acceptable.
    I personally would get my own grain to keep with me and make sure my horse was fed as I made arrangements to leave. No point in flipping out.

    And, as an aside, I hate how everyone hides behind texts and Facebook messages now. Just talk to someone face to face. Then you KNOW they heard you and that you understand the nuances of a conversation.

    Leave a comment:


  • SuzieQNutter
    replied
    "If someone comes in complaining about where they have been, just wait and it won't be long before they are complaining about here."

    Leave a comment:


  • Pennywell Bay
    replied
    Originally posted by AlexS View Post
    I wasn't snooping to check the grain, I was there to spend time with my horse. And when I do that, I help with chores, which included feeding. However I think it would be fine for any boarder to check feed bins, when they are at the barn.

    Feed was bought this afternoon, so there is just enough to make it through the feeds.
    I guess she just flies by the seat of her pants, and assumes she's not going to have a family emergency or a car accident or anything else that could happen.

    I have a barn that I can always move to, that has an opening. I am good friends with them, and could move a horse in the middle of the night and leave a note if I needed to - that wouldn't be an issue.
    But am seeing two barns with more amenities tomorrow.




    The adoption hasn't been finalized yet, still waiting for paperwork and a judge's signature. The first to move, moves out on Thursday, 2 others the first week of Dec. It's likely not going to be finalized until the end of Dec.
    If the barn owner asked you to leave, I doubt she wants/needs your help with chores.

    Spend time with your horse and leave graciously on 11/30.

    Leave a comment:


  • IronwoodFarm
    replied
    Originally posted by AlexS View Post
    I wasn't snooping to check the grain, I was there to spend time with my horse. And when I do that, I help with chores, which included feeding. However I think it would be fine for any boarder to check feed bins, when they are at the barn.
    I'm all for spending time with your horse. In fact, I do not expect my boarders to help with barn chores because that takes time away from their horse. I do not allow boarders to feed. I feed or my paid feeder feeds. My feed room is locked otherwise. I not want boarders mucking about with the feed. When I boarded, I would not dream of being in the feed room unless I was with BO or BM.

    I do agree that this particular BO manages on a "just in time model." It's not what I do, but it may work for her. Clearly it does not work for the OP. Fair enough.

    However if the OP wants to keep her horse at this barn until 11-30 the she needs to be careful. Spend time with the horse; keep away from chores. If you think your horse is lacking feed, then buy a bag and keep it in your car. Also stop badmouthing the current BO to the other boarders. There is much to be said for leaving in an orderly fashion versus a "leave immediately" situation.

    Leave a comment:

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