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Most Embarrassing Moment (Confession thread spin off)

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  • Most Embarrassing Moment (Confession thread spin off)

    After reading the confession thread, HILARIOUS, I thought it would be funny to share some of the most embarrassing moments we have experienced. Whether it is just a mortifying moment, since we are all apparently peeing in stalls and trailers I imagine someone has gotten caught, or if it's just the things we do or say around the non horse people in our lives... Well you get the idea.

    I will start. I was riding a big shuttle bus from parking to a non horse related event and I thought I was alone other than the driver who was in a little booth. My phone rang, it was my friend, and the conversation happened like this.

    Me:Hey, What's up?
    Friend:I really need to do something, I think he must have a huge bean or something. Tell me how you clean your horse's sheath.

    Me:<Detailed explanation of how to "get up in there around the penis and get it all out", including how to insert finger into the hole and how to encourage him to drop, yeah, VERY DETAILED.>
    Friend:<Goes through steps to ensure she fully understands.>

    Me:Yes, just relax and take it slow, he will feel so much better once you get all that out.

    Imagine my surprise when I hang up and hear a soft cough. I turn around to 4 young men sitting up in seats they were obviously laying on before staring awkwardly at me. One literally had his mouth hanging open. I gave them a nod and went back to my ear buds thinking, well they certainly learned about the perks of owning a horse today.

    I wasn't embarrassed until they all gave me a wide berth and looked at me strangely as they exited at their stop. After they got off it dawned on me that I had never once mentioned I was talking about a horse or sheath or implied that I was talking about an animal of any kind. I was mortified, thankfully I will never see them again. My friend got a great laugh at my expense.

  • #2
    I was a teenager, had been sick with bronchitis, in bed for a week.
    First time out, of course, I went to the riding school.
    The instructor mentioned it was good that I will be around again, that one horse I exercise is going to need some riding.
    I hop up and down and say I feel fine, I can ride him now.
    The instructor is not so sure, but I insist and we get the horse ready.
    He gives me a leg up and I promptly, before I even get settled in the saddle, get so dizzy I topple right off the other side, giving the poor instructor a big scare.

    Guess he was right, I was not ready to ride quite yet.

    Comment

    • Original Poster

      #3
      Originally posted by Bluey View Post
      I was a teenager, had been sick with bronchitis, in bed for a week.
      First time out, of course, I went to the riding school.
      The instructor mentioned it was good that I will be around again, that one horse I exercise is going to need some riding.
      I hop up and down and say I feel fine, I can ride him now.
      The instructor is not so sure, but I insist and we get the horse ready.
      He gives me a leg up and I promptly, before I even get settled in the saddle, get so dizzy I topple right off the other side, giving the poor instructor a big scare.

      Guess he was right, I was not ready to ride quite yet.
      Nice! My son recently had a stomach bug. The next day he said he wanted to go ride. I should not have listened to an 8 year old but I did. 105 Fahrenheit, 40 min drive, 1/4 tank of fuel, 30 min to tack up horses... It only took him 45 seconds to lose his lunch all over his big TB's neck and mane. He looked at me and said, "You were right, I wasn't ready." LOL

      Comment


      • #4
        Got a leg up outside the ring to go do a bareback fun class. Went right over the other side.
        Ah, Showsheen.
        You are what you dare.

        Comment


        • #5
          I was at a horse show getting my horse tacked up for our classes. I was already in my show clothes when I went to go get my saddle out of the trunk of the car. The car was across a very, very dusty dirt road from the horse trailer, and when I started walking back with my saddle, my spurs somehow got hooked together (I have no idea how! They were pretty small spurs and they were on correctly), and I fell on my butt in the middle of the road.

          It was at this point I realized that I had forgotten to look both ways to cross the street and there were several of those huge 18 wheeler horse transports patiently waiting for me to get my spurs untangled and get up while my barn mates snickered at me. I looked like I had fallen off for the rest of the day since the dust from the road was an odd color and would not brush off!

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by GotGait View Post
            Got a leg up outside the ring to go do a bareback fun class. Went right over the other side.
            Ah, Showsheen.
            I've done that a few times. Once i forgot that I put baby oil on my mare the day before. I got up and slowly went down. Another time I was trying to get on her using a hill, when I over extended and slid underneath her. Another time I was so proud of myself that I was able to belly up on her from the ground, but as I was trying to position myself and get my leg over, she relaxed, propped a leg, and her weight shift propelled me over her. Bareback is fun!

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            • #7
              Doing lead line with a borrowed Shetland pony. It was non cooperative and had to be almost be dragged around the ring prompting the judge to ask how old she was. The at the trailer reins around the pony's neck I reach for the halter and it drops its head backs up and is free of the reins. It then proceeds to gallop full tilt across the show grounds giving lie to its I can't move act.
              "I am sorry, I lead a bit of a complex life, things don't always happen in the right order" The Doctor

              Comment

              • Original Poster

                #8
                These are great. I don't really ride because of an old back injury and being a firefighter I can't afford to get hurt and miss work or be performing at less than 100%, so the kids are the riders. Well I got my son an 8 year old OTTB and he had been used to help train polo ponies and had been doing a lot of active riding. Our trainer was exercising him but had gone on vacation for the weekend so I decided to run him a bit before I put my son up on him. Hadn't been on a horse for about 5 years, but I hopped up there and it was all natural and we trotted a bit as my kids watched from the safety of my truck bed. I was out on the practice field so I decided to let him really run. He was FAST. I get done, walk over to the kids who were dumbfounded. I realized they had no idea I could ride. Some other people were watching nearby and were quite impressed since he was a beautiful mover and I had really just given him the rein and let him run. I was quite proud until my son says really loud, "Did you text <trainer> and ask her how to do that or did you watch YouTube last night to learn?" The spectators snickered and walked away. Thanks Kyle.

                Comment

                • Original Poster

                  #9
                  And it never fails, if you say your horse won't do something, they wait until you finish the sentence and look you dead in the face as they do exactly that. Same goes the other way around. You can load in a trailer 1000 times without incident and the second you tell someone he loads with no problem the horse acts like he hasn't seen a trailer in years.

                  My husband calls them the women of the animal kingdom because the second you think you have one figured out they do something that reminds you that you have no idea what is going on in that head. He says if you get a good one it will just let you believe you have it all figured out and never test you, not sure if he means a woman or a horse there, but he is crazy if he thinks I am letting him figure me out. LOL

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Entire troop of ceremonial cavalry at a "hold" in a large, urban parade. Our horses had all been eating more than their share of green, June grass, some of which they'd enjoyed hand-cut in their haynets on the trailers.

                    One horse decides here's a great opportunity to pee--and does so, splashing on the concrete, groaning and making a lop-eared, blissful face. Whereupon just about EVERY OTHER HORSE in the Troop decides to do the EXACT SAME THING!

                    The pee was running down the road into the storm drains, people were leaping up and yanking their beach chairs and towels out of the road, jumping back in their flip-flops and squealing. Funniest freakin' thing you EVER saw; I just stood in my irons, rearranged reins and sabre, and said "What CAN you DO . . . !"

                    Fortunately, the parade soon moved on . . .

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      I was probably 16 or 17 and wanted to get some lessons in because my first horse was still only 2 (yes, my parents bought me a weanling It actually went well though). So I was going to the local-est place and the day I could ride they only had kid group lessons. No big deal, I'm out of shape, I don't have any delusions or grandeur or jumping.

                      Instructor was always late and one day ended up rushing me to the ring, I forget what happened. I think I had to go back to grab my helmet, she tells me she'll check my girth. Get back out, get on, all seems well.

                      We're walking around the corner and I'm on this 16.3hh hunter Paint gelding. I feel the saddle start sliding and no matter what I do it's just not going to stop. Got the horse stopped and just melted off to the side and ended up hanging, in the dirt, with a foot caught in the stirrup. And all the little children giggling at me. And the instructor too busy on her cell phone to get in much of a hurry to come to the rescue.

                      Yeahhh, that was fun
                      It's a small world -- unless you gotta walk home.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Jogging a horse for the vet in the ring a few years ago. I am so intent on watching said horse that I run straight into a jump standard and it and me go crashing to the ground. Thank goodness horse just stopped with a WTF look on his face. The really embarrassing thing is I did it again the other night, fortunately just tripped on a cavaletti this time and only one kid was there to see me.

                        Comment

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