• Welcome to the Chronicle Forums.
    Please complete your profile. The forums and the rest of www.chronofhorse.com has single sign-in, so your log in information for one will automatically work for the other. Disclaimer: The opinions expressed here are the views of the individual and do not necessarily reflect the views and opinions of The Chronicle of the Horse.

Announcement

Collapse

Forum rules and no-advertising policy

As a participant on this forum, it is your responsibility to know and follow our rules. Please read this message in its entirety.

Board Rules

1. You’re responsible for what you say.
As outlined in Section 230 of the Communications Decency Act, The Chronicle of the Horse and its affiliates, as well Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd., the developers of vBulletin, are not legally responsible for statements made in the forums.

This is a public forum viewed by a wide spectrum of people, so please be mindful of what you say and who might be reading it—details of personal disputes are likely better handled privately. While posters are legally responsible for their statements, the moderators may in their discretion remove or edit posts that violate these rules. Users have the ability to modify or delete their own messages after posting, but administrators generally will not delete posts, threads or accounts upon request.

Outright inflammatory, vulgar, harassing, malicious or otherwise inappropriate statements and criminal charges unsubstantiated by a reputable news source or legal documentation will not be tolerated and will be dealt with at the discretion of the moderators.

2. Conversations in horse-related forums should be horse-related.
The forums are a wonderful source of information and support for members of the horse community. While it’s understandably tempting to share information or search for input on other topics upon which members might have a similar level of knowledge, members must maintain the focus on horses.

3. Keep conversations productive, on topic and civil.
Discussion and disagreement are inevitable and encouraged; personal insults, diatribes and sniping comments are unproductive and unacceptable. Whether a subject is light-hearted or serious, keep posts focused on the current topic and of general interest to other participants of that thread. Utilize the private message feature or personal email where appropriate to address side topics or personal issues not related to the topic at large.

4. No advertising in the discussion forums.
Posts in the discussion forums directly or indirectly advertising horses, jobs, items or services for sale or wanted will be removed at the discretion of the moderators. Use of the private messaging feature or email addresses obtained through users’ profiles for unsolicited advertising is not permitted.

Company representatives may participate in discussions and answer questions about their products or services, or suggest their products on recent threads if they fulfill the criteria of a query. False "testimonials" provided by company affiliates posing as general consumers are not appropriate, and self-promotion of sales, ad campaigns, etc. through the discussion forums is not allowed.

Paid advertising is available on our classifieds site and through the purchase of banner ads. The tightly monitored Giveaways forum permits free listings of genuinely free horses and items available or wanted (on a limited basis). Items offered for trade are not allowed.

Advertising Policy Specifics
When in doubt of whether something you want to post constitutes advertising, please contact a moderator privately in advance for further clarification. Refer to the following points for general guidelines:

Horses – Only general discussion about the buying, leasing, selling and pricing of horses is permitted. If the post contains, or links to, the type of specific information typically found in a sales or wanted ad, and it’s related to a horse for sale, regardless of who’s selling it, it doesn’t belong in the discussion forums.

Stallions – Board members may ask for suggestions on breeding stallion recommendations. Stallion owners may reply to such queries by suggesting their own stallions, only if their horse fits the specific criteria of the original poster. Excessive promotion of a stallion by its owner or related parties is not permitted and will be addressed at the discretion of the moderators.

Services – Members may use the forums to ask for general recommendations of trainers, barns, shippers, farriers, etc., and other members may answer those requests by suggesting themselves or their company, if their services fulfill the specific criteria of the original post. Members may not solicit other members for business if it is not in response to a direct, genuine query.

Products – While members may ask for general opinions and suggestions on equipment, trailers, trucks, etc., they may not list the specific attributes for which they are in the market, as such posts serve as wanted ads.

Event Announcements – Members may post one notification of an upcoming event that may be of interest to fellow members, if the original poster does not benefit financially from the event. Such threads may not be “bumped” excessively. Premium members may post their own notices in the Event Announcements forum.

Charities/Rescues – Announcements for charitable or fundraising events can only be made for 501(c)(3) tax-exempt organizations. Special exceptions may be made, at the moderators’ discretion and direction, for board-related events or fundraising activities in extraordinary circumstances.

Occasional posts regarding horses available for adoption through IRS-registered horse rescue or placement programs are permitted in the appropriate forums, but these threads may be limited at the discretion of the moderators. Individuals may not advertise or make announcements for horses in need of rescue, placement or adoption unless the horse is available through a recognized rescue or placement agency or government-run entity or the thread fits the criteria for and is located in the Giveaways forum.

5. Do not post copyrighted photographs unless you have purchased that photo and have permission to do so.

6. Respect other members.
As members are often passionate about their beliefs and intentions can easily be misinterpreted in this type of environment, try to explore or resolve the inevitable disagreements that arise in the course of threads calmly and rationally.

If you see a post that you feel violates the rules of the board, please click the “alert” button (exclamation point inside of a triangle) in the bottom left corner of the post, which will alert ONLY the moderators to the post in question. They will then take whatever action, or no action, as deemed appropriate for the situation at their discretion. Do not air grievances regarding other posters or the moderators in the discussion forums.

Please be advised that adding another user to your “Ignore” list via your User Control Panel can be a useful tactic, which blocks posts and private messages by members whose commentary you’d rather avoid reading.

7. We have the right to reproduce statements made in the forums.
The Chronicle of the Horse may copy, quote, link to or otherwise reproduce posts, or portions of posts, in print or online for advertising or editorial purposes, if attributed to their original authors, and by posting in this forum, you hereby grant to The Chronicle of the Horse a perpetual, non-exclusive license under copyright and other rights, to do so.

8. We reserve the right to enforce and amend the rules.
The moderators may delete, edit, move or close any post or thread at any time, or refrain from doing any of the foregoing, in their discretion, and may suspend or revoke a user’s membership privileges at any time to maintain adherence to the rules and the general spirit of the forum. These rules may be amended at any time to address the current needs of the board.

Please see our full Terms of Service and Privacy Policy for more information.

Thanks for being a part of the COTH forums!

(Revised 1/26/16)
See more
See less

Choosing horses over children?

Collapse
X
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • I'm guessing the person who brought it back to life did a search on the subject and didn't notice the date of the thread.

    6 years old, wow, i wonder if some of these people do have children

    Comment


    • Oh. Mein. Gott. In. Himmel. Really, just shoot me now.

      Comment


      • Originally posted by mrs.smith View Post

        Are there any other women here who have decided to not have (or delay having) children in pursuit of riding? There have been a bunch of "how do I juggle kids/horse threads, but not a "I'd rather just ride" one.
        Because they always seem to stick there heads into the "how do I juggle threads" and air their opinions there about how *they choose not the have children so they don't Have These Problems*. Feel free to start a clique.. I'm sure you'll have lots of followers.

        *apologizes now for being snippy- I'm suffering Horse withdrawl and not because of my kids... they are suffering horse withdrawl as well. It's complicated and when it's all sorted out if anyone cares I'll he happy to explain it then*
        If i'm posting on Coth, it's either raining so I can't ride or it's night time and I can't sleep.

        Comment


        • Me. I chose to run my own research program at a university, and have a horse.

          My "kids" are my students, I keep track of them through life, if they want the mentorship.

          Works for me!!!
          www.specialhorses.org
          a 501(c)3 organization helping 501(c)3 equine rescues

          Comment


          • Not a maternal bone in my body, except for where my horse(s) are concerned. LOL

            Now, that doesn't mean I hate children or anything. Just never wanted any, nor the considerable burdens they come with. I figured if I didn't want the "mom job," I'd be doing any child I had a disservice. It meant turning down the proposal of a guy I really, really thought was "the one." He wanted not just kids, but "LOTS of kids." Um....sorry.... just not willing to compromise on that one (nor was he). And he was fine with the horses, too. Just wanted that big family, and my idea of a family was two: Me and him.

            Fortunately, I was NEVER pressured by my parents. My mother was entirely sympathetic, and my father fairly indifferent. My brother is childless, too. End of the line. ROFLOL (Nah, the are lots of cousins).

            Comment


            • I'm 46, never had children, never regretted it. There are a lot of things they interfere with, horses being one of them.

              Comment


              • Wow, old thread.

                Put me in as another do not/will not be having children. I love my nieces and nephews and I think that is as close to having children in my life as it's going to get. I just never really felt the need to have children of my own.

                Comment


                • I didn't even notice the date...but then, I'm not always sure what year this is anyway.

                  Just as well I didn't have kids!
                  www.specialhorses.org
                  a 501(c)3 organization helping 501(c)3 equine rescues

                  Comment


                  • I will never have children of my own!!! I have said this since I was about 8 and I am in my thirties now. It wasn't because I chose horses over children I just never wanted children. I don't know what to do with a child under the age of 4 and don't want to learn. I am currently dating a wonderful guy who has a 3 year old son from a prior marrage and there is a chance that we may work out. I adore this boy but being around him doesn't make me want to procreate at all.
                    Member of the Standardbreds with Saddles Clique!
                    Sophie 11 yo Iberian Warmblood mare
                    Seadog Man 11 yo STB gelding
                    Our New Jet 7 yo STB Gelding

                    Comment


                    • Originally posted by xeroxchick View Post
                      There are a lot of things they interfere with.
                      wow....that's kind of....heartless is the only word that comes to mind.

                      I was indifferent to having kids for a long time. If it happened, great. If it didn't happen, great.

                      But I'm currently 5 months pregnant with out first and I would NOT trade this experience for anything in the world. We recently found out that we're having a girl, and to see her little profile, her little fingers and toes on the ultrasound brought tears to my eyes.

                      And my horse...well, he's on vacation, fat as a tick and happy being a temporary pasture potato. I haven't ridden in about a month and yes, I miss it, but I'm also enjoying the vacation from it as well.

                      I'm 34 and have been riding since age 7, and I plan to continue riding, no matter how many kids we have. Where there's a will, there's a way. There is always a way to make it work. I know plenty of people who ride and have babies and kids and they all make it work. I have no doubt that I will too.

                      Horsey love is great, yeah, but I don't think it can be compared to the love given by a child. But that's just my 2 cents.
                      The more you stir the $hit, the more it stinks.

                      Comment


                      • Never have had the slightest desire to have kids. I can't say I'm choosing horses instead, because even without horses, I wouldn't want kids. Two separate cases. But horses, to me, are much more rewarding. I would never inflict myself on a kid or a kid on me. That alone would be a deal-breaker with the otherwise perfect SO. Fortunately, the guy I'm dating doesn't like them, either.

                        Just last week during a visit to Medicaid about Mom's nursing home, I did spend 30 minutes restraining myself from kid-o-cide by comparing the behavior of my 2yo colt from that morning's session with the behavior of the hooligans in Medicaid. My colt was far better trained, better disciplined, better behaved, and, IMHO, far cuter.

                        Comment


                        • Originally posted by Catersun View Post
                          Because they always seem to stick there heads into the "how do I juggle threads" and air their opinions there about how *they choose not the have children so they don't Have These Problems*. Feel free to start a clique.. I'm sure you'll have lots of followers.

                          *apologizes now for being snippy- I'm suffering Horse withdrawl and not because of my kids... they are suffering horse withdrawl as well. It's complicated and when it's all sorted out if anyone cares I'll he happy to explain it then*
                          Cater hope things are ok...?

                          Frankly I adore my daughter with all my heart and would not trade her for anything. Has it put a damper on my riding endeavors? Sure... but that never crosses my mind.

                          There was a time when I was pretty damned sure we'd be childless, and not by choice. Horses got me through the depression that accompanied that realization. I am glad I had something else to focus on and be passionate about.

                          Mr FG is supportive of me staying involved in the horse thing and I am at the barn every day caring for my almost-retired TB. If we had two kids I suspect it would be tougher, for awhile... but we all know that horses are my passion and it will always be a part of my life, in some ways.

                          Kids and the decision to have them is very personal, and I don't judge anyone for their choice either way.
                          Last edited by FlashGordon; Jul. 2, 2009, 01:56 PM.
                          We couldn't all be cowboys, so some of us are clowns.

                          Comment

                          • Original Poster

                            I'm the OP. old thread is an understatement!! Just ask my four year old kid, lol!
                            One cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not dined well. - Virginia Woolf

                            Comment


                            • Originally posted by aurora171989 View Post
                              I'm guessing the person who brought it back to life did a search on the subject and didn't notice the date of the thread.

                              6 years old, wow, i wonder if some of these people do have children
                              My thoughts exactly. Back in 2003, I was 27 and children were the furthest thing from my mind. Wow, and I had not even started riding back then!! I did not think I wanted one. Fast forward, I am now 33 (sigh... birthday today so it is tough to write that for the first time ) And I am reconsidering those plans.
                              Love my "Slo-TTB"

                              Comment


                              • Originally posted by Reynard Ridge View Post
                                Two questions:

                                1. WHY was this thread raised from the dead? It began and ended (until a few minutes agao) in 2003.

                                2. How many of the avowed childless from 2003 now have little bundles of joy dangling from a Baby Bjorn?

                                Inquiring minds want to know.
                                I always LOL at RR
                                Love my "Slo-TTB"

                                Comment


                                • At our recent barn party, I was looking around the room and noticed that there were a number of professional women who have chosen to dedicate their lives to their horses instead of having children. I am amoung the childless with a horse. I am satisfied with this, even though my family thinks I'm a nut.
                                  I'm the OP. old thread is an understatement!! Just ask my four year old kid, lol!

                                  Congratulations 4 years late Mrs. Smith!
                                  You jump in the saddle,
                                  Hold onto the bridle!
                                  Jump in the line!
                                  ...Belefonte

                                  Comment


                                  • Originally posted by mrs.smith View Post
                                    I'm the OP. old thread is an understatement!! Just ask my four year old kid, lol!
                                    hahaha! That's funny and congrats mrs.smith. What changed your mind?

                                    I'm always curious if those who have made the choice not to have children, when they get to the point where having them is no longer an option, do they regret their choice? I think had I not had kids, I would forever feel like I was missing out on something. I love my horses, but it's such an incredible journey you go on with your children, not the same thing at all.

                                    I do respect people who make the choice to not have children though. It's admirable that they know themselves well enough to know that's not for them. I can't understand when other people condemn that choice. Different strokes and all.

                                    Comment


                                    • Originally posted by Reynard Ridge View Post
                                      Two questions:

                                      1. WHY was this thread raised from the dead? It began and ended (until a few minutes agao) in 2003.

                                      2. How many of the avowed childless from 2003 now have little bundles of joy dangling from a Baby Bjorn?

                                      Inquiring minds want to know.
                                      ...

                                      Have no idea as to why it was raised from the dead but to answer your second question:

                                      2 kids, 5 and nearly 2. # of horses went from 3 to 6 but 1 IS a pony.

                                      But I never disavowed to having kids.

                                      Comment


                                      • Originally posted by Reynard Ridge View Post
                                        Two questions:

                                        1. WHY was this thread raised from the dead? It began and ended (until a few minutes agao) in 2003.

                                        2. How many of the avowed childless from 2003 now have little bundles of joy dangling from a Baby Bjorn?

                                        Inquiring minds want to know.
                                        Yet how many times has someone raised a topic only to get the snarky, "Why don't you learn to use the search feature" response?
                                        Just sayin'.

                                        Comment


                                        • Hmmm...

                                          I never vowed not to have children but I also never pictured myself with them. My nephew once asked me if I didn't like children. I said I liked them just fine but really preferred them when they got old enough to carry on a half-way intelligent conversation. He said something like "I'm about there aren't I?" Since we were having a fairly intelligent conversation, I'd say so!

                                          Just last weekend, the lady I generally sit with at church out of the blue said I needed to find myself a guy soon so I could have children. I said, that's ok, I don't really feel the need to have children. She then tried to argue that children are cheaper than horses. Then she told me that I really would want them once it was too late so I better hurry. I told her it was already too late. She then told me that I might as well give up (on the guy) then. Huh? Same woman once told me I must be selfish if I was single. Sigh. I give her some slack for being elderly and we are supposed to be forgiving after all. Wouldn't mind having the guy but never believed in getting married just for the sake of it or having children just because it was the accepted thing to do in our society. How is that selfish?
                                          Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it. Goethe

                                          Comment

                                          Working...
                                          X