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Stuff non-horsey people say

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  • #41
    Originally posted by microbovine View Post
    Okay, my turn to be clueless....What in the world is a chakras? Is it contagious?
    They are the areas of the body down a central line that Chinese medicine and accupuncture are based on. There is head, throat, heart and the rest I can't remember
    Founder of the Dyslexic Clique. Dyslexics of the world - UNTIE!!

    Member: Incredible Invisbles

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    • #42
      I have a new one! A friend just asked me if I was going to ride my horse in the Kentucky Derby next year. Hahaha It was all I could do not to crack up!

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      • #43
        Pete wears pull on bell boots 24/7. MIL asked why I had plungers on his feet?
        "Everyone will start to cheer, when you put on your sailin shoes"-Lowell George

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        • #44
          Originally posted by microbovine View Post
          Okay, my turn to be clueless....What in the world is a chakras? Is it contagious?
          Chakras are metaphysical energy points on the body.

          Wikipedia is better at explaining than me.
          The Trials and Jubilations of a Twenty-Something Re-rider
          Happy owner of Kieran the mostly-white-very-large-not-pony.

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          • #45
            A non-horsey co-worker of DH has a daughter that rides at a big jumper barn. He's quite the character. Brooklyn boy with the accent and attitude. His daughter was looking for a new horse and her trainer was having one shipped from Long Island for consideration. "Serious jing," according to him. Was supposed to arrive Saturday morning. On Monday DH asks how it went. He rolls his eyes. "They got delayed in traffic. Surprise. My daughter's ready to freak out and I told her to chill or she can kiss Pookie-pants good-by. They rolled in about dinner time. He steps off the rig in all his gear, you know, the hockey helmet and goalie pads. He was fine."
            This it be all wot we want in life, wenn peoples dey loff us. ~ Willem

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            • #46
              Yup - I am regularly asked - even by folk who "grew up on a farm" - when my Hackney pony will be fullgrown.
              I tell them physically WYSIWYG, but mentally, never.

              Sweet non-horsy neighbor once called me to tell me WB & pony had been seriously fighting and WB had "picked him right up by the neck!"
              Since I had just fed, and there was not a hair out of place on pony, I assume some squealing & possibly a "Cut.It.Out!" neckhold by WB to pony may have happened.

              They're pretty amusing when they playfight - 17h+ VS 12h-nothing
              *friend of bar.ka*RIP all my lovely boys, gone too soon:
              Steppin' Out 1988-2004
              Hey Vern! 1982-2009, Cash's Bay Threat 1994-2009
              Sam(Jaybee Altair) 1994-2015

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              • #47
                My MIL insists that all Palominos are crazy, and I've tried on multiple occasions to tell her palomino is a color, not a breed, and not all horses of one breed or one color are crazy.

                I also get tired of people telling me they can ride because they did it as a kid on a trail ride, and to quote one of my co-workers "rode and tamed the wildest/biggest horse in the barn". Who ironically was also a palomino according to her....

                And I agree, every non horse person will tell you they've be "bucked". I'm not sure why, but maybe that's the only horse word they can remember?
                Foaling Around www.facebook.com/foalingaround
                Custom Equestrian Items and Bath Products

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                • #48
                  "I said I need some EXERCISE! Riding isn't exercise. You just sit there. The horse does all the work."
                  Rack on!

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                  • #49
                    Originally posted by OnThinIce View Post
                    A non-horsey co-worker of DH has a daughter that rides at a big jumper barn. He's quite the character. Brooklyn boy with the accent and attitude. His daughter was looking for a new horse and her trainer was having one shipped from Long Island for consideration. "Serious jing," according to him. Was supposed to arrive Saturday morning. On Monday DH asks how it went. He rolls his eyes. "They got delayed in traffic. Surprise. My daughter's ready to freak out and I told her to chill or she can kiss Pookie-pants good-by. They rolled in about dinner time. He steps off the rig in all his gear, you know, the hockey helmet and goalie pads. He was fine."
                    Oh the picture! LOL!
                    Rack on!

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                    • #50
                      GaitedGloryRider, your story reminded me of a lady at a barn I used to board at who had a VERY reactive Arabian. She loved trail riding with me because my mare was such a lazy plug it helped keep her boy calm. But one day, we were joined by the guy with the Pasos and when his horse started doing the Paso gait, the look on the Arab's face was priceless, as was his jigging like crazy. He was looking all around to see what the others were "jigging" about because surely something was going to eat them! My horse just looked at him like he was an idiot

                      She never went riding with Paso guy again, her horse just couldn't handle it!

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                      • #51
                        What gets me are the people who "should" be horse people. The people who take lessons from an actual trainer, buy or lease a horse, and actually work on their riding, but never become horse people.

                        They continue to talk about being "bucked." They continue to do the ignorant things that become stupid things after awhile (by the time they should have learned not to do them) and are often dangerous things as well. They just never get it.

                        Yet they continue to pay for lessons in which they really aren't learning anything.
                        Founder of the People Who Prefer COTH Over FB Clique
                        People Who Hate to Rush to Kill Wildlife Clique!
                        "I Sing Silly Songs to My Animals!" Clique

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                        • #52
                          Originally posted by Superminion View Post
                          My husband (who is trying really hard to learn) texts me asking if I'm "whipping" tonight, usually if I'm not home around 7. He means am I planning on lunging... I've tried to correct him but apparently "whipping" is more exciting so we just let that dog be.

                          Maybe hubby is living in hope? Just wondering ... no offence meant ...
                          Founder of the People Who Prefer COTH Over FB Clique
                          People Who Hate to Rush to Kill Wildlife Clique!
                          "I Sing Silly Songs to My Animals!" Clique

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                          • #53
                            "I thought you already knew how to ride?" is the most common. I also get questions pertaining to every horse sport known to mankind and get strange looks when I admit I don't necessarily know the correct answer.

                            Not a comment but what about when people find out you have horses and invite themselves to come over to ride?

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                            • #54
                              Had a boarder who owned this mare for like six years bring her horse expert friend to the barn one day (she showed up at the barn about once every three months). Towards the end of the visit I show up and she begins screaming and CRYING at me telling me that friend "sally" told her that her horses feet were ROTTING OFF!! and how could I be so cruel and not call her and how her friend said that it could ruin her horse forever! (this is coming from the same person who thinks horses need their feet trimmed once a year >.< ) So i'm like what? Think about it for a second and am like "you mean she has some thrush in that left front? I know, it won't kill her and i've been treating it already for 3-4 days" She was like what is thrush? oy...

                              Same person dis-assembled my fancy new-to-me expensive GREEN biothane halter bridle to borrow and lost pieces because it had a nose band and she wanted to make it "western"... she was un allowed to use tack without permission after that... not like it stopped her though....

                              Gaited glory I've had some walking horse hate here and there too and i just try to not punch anyone.... in fact I had a non horse person ask me if I tortured my horse once after i told her it was a TWH.. sure let me just tell you about how I torture her lol

                              Also the "wont they break their teeth?" when you put a bit in.

                              my boyfriend use to ask if I was going to "clip my horses toe nails" close enough I guess.

                              my dad the non horse person was full of gems such as
                              "It had a chair tied on so I hopped on!" horse was saddled
                              "Can you hand me the steering wheel?" -Bridle
                              "Come clean out it's paws for me" -hooves
                              "can't I just buy one the right color and have you train it the way I want?"
                              "Make it hi-ho silver" - his older dead broke gelding.
                              "I didn't know they ate hot dogs!" followed by our "you fed him WHAT?!"
                              "my horse was broke so we had to take it to a special repair shop" aka special vet
                              "where is the throttle at?"

                              I'm sue I could keep going he keeps us entertained!!
                              Saddle Tree Acres

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                              • #55
                                Wait, wait I have another one, lol.
                                I walk into my local Dunkin Donuts in my riding gear before heading up to the barn.
                                Stranger in line: "So, who won (enter recent horse race here) the other day?"
                                Me: ...."I don't know...I don't really watch racing."
                                Stranger: [silence and look of bewilderment]

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                                • #56
                                  Originally posted by GaitedGloryRider View Post
                                  I once couldn't find my way out of a conversation with a woman who insisted on arguing with me about my horse being an Arabian. She was right, I was wrong, all white horses with little spots on them (flea-bitten grey) are Arabians, she knew he was an Arabian because of his color, whomever sold me the horse lied to me, I obviously didn't know my horse was an Arabian, this b!tch followed me all over the park and even started down the trail head after me when I was trying to ride away from her arguing with me that my horse was an Arabian.

                                  So my horse was an Arabian. My grey, gaited, jug-headed, thick bodied, plug-ugly, nondescript, hard pacing when he was in a bad mood, supposedly a Tennessee Walker but very obviously at least part Standardbred horse was clearly AN ARABIAN. I swear I've never wanted to punch a non-horse person in the throat for an off observation about my horse like I did that woman. She just wouldn't let it go.
                                  I've had several conversations of this nature. Once, a FARRIER that insisted my horse could not be a Thoroughbred because he is "nice to be around" and "most of them are not like that." WHAT? He kept insisting that he must be a QH. This was a well-respected, very expensive farrier in my area. Unbelievable. He continued to argue with me, even after I pointed out that he is tattooed and I have his JC papers, which match his tattoo. Idiot. He kept saying, "No, I think he's a Quarter Horse...they are tattooed sometimes too." Whatever, you moron.

                                  Then there was a 12 year old kid at one barn who wanted to argue with me about whether or not my horse is bay or chestnut. He's chestnut. Kind of on the liver chestnut side, but I wouldn't necessarily even call him liver chestnut. She was adamant that he is bay, lol. She also offered to "train" him for me sometime, because she rode all of the difficult horses at camp. I was tempted to let her try to ride him, but decided I did not want to get sued after all.

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                                  • #57
                                    I also love it when non-horse people tell me they need to schedule a time to "come ride my horse." LOL, no. No. That would not end well for anyone!

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                                    • #58
                                      Oh Sat evening we went to a local mounted shooting event for entertainment. Sitting in the bleachers and one of the competitors drops a gun. Man in stands behind us says, "Oh, he dropped his gun! I just saw something metallic and I thought the horse lost a hoof!"

                                      Ummmm, I think it might have at least stumbled.....
                                      Life doesn't have perfect footing.

                                      Bloggily entertain yourself with our adventures (and disasters):
                                      We Are Flying Solo

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                                      • #59
                                        Originally posted by FineAlready View Post
                                        She also offered to "train" him for me sometime, because she rode all of the difficult horses at camp. I was tempted to let her try to ride him, but decided I did not want to get sued after all.
                                        A couple of years ago, I was thinking of offering my 20+ been-there-done-that pinto mare for half-lease to a local horse crazy kid. Met some really nice folks and a bit of batsh** crazy. My favorite was the lady who called me (several times, no less) ... she didn't want to pay for a lease, but her daughter had taken lessons for TWO WHOLE YEARS and would like a horse to ride. AND ... she could train my horse (the 20+ year old who's already taught at least a dozen kids to ride) for free. She could "train" her because the last month of lessons, the kid had learned to canter, "and that's all there is, walk, trot and canter."

                                        Might have been a sweet kid, who knows. But the mom scared me.

                                        On the colors, one of my favorites was a special needs student who referred to the bay paint mare she regularly rode as a "calico." Super-cute!
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                                        In the depth of winter, I finally learned that there was in me invincible summer.
                                        -Albert Camus

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                                        • #60
                                          This isn't from a non-horsey person but from a very presumptuous horsey one. I let a girl ride my horse a few weeks ago to practice some movements her own horse isn't trained in yet. The last time her mom had seen my horse was last winter when he was having major issues - spooks, bucks, meltdowns, etc. Since then we have addressed some pain issues and arthritis and he's been an angel for months - complete turnaround! Anyway, this girl has a good ride on him and afterwards her mom tells me that it's obvious they have a special connection and isn't it great that she was able to sort him out for me? Maybe she should ride him regularly to help me out since *he is too much for me*!

                                          Meanwhile I'm still paying off the vet and saddle bills that actually sorted things out

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