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Looking for a fight

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  • Looking for a fight

    I'm new to the forum. Been checking out threads and enjoy partaking when appropriate and I've noticed something... Almost all the threads I've read or posted in have turned into a goofy fight with forum members arguing really pointless things. Does this really happen so much or am I just getting involved in "special" threads? Like if you're looking for an argument and want to hide behind a screen name I guess this is a great place for it. If you aren't looking for a fight, maybe attempting to phrase things in a non threatening and judgemental manner would be helpful. Can't we all just get along?

  • #2
    Not limited to here, for sure. I see that a lot on here but I also see it a lot on other forums. One I have quit posting on and just check sporadically because it seems all the so-called "experts" do is wait for someone to come on there and ask a question so they can pounce. Very destructive thing for the hobby, IMO.
    America dialed 911. Donald Trump answered the phone.

    Stop pumping money into colleges and start getting ready to earn money in the projected tradesman shortage of 2024. Make Trades Great Again!


    • #3
      Welcome to COTH! Comment where you have something useful, argue a point where you feel the need, and for the rest just sit back and enjoy the show.

      As horse people, we're all our own brand of crazy. Just some more than others.


      • #4
        You are right there, some posters just seem to follow others around and make personal remarks ever chance they get, as I can attest, as I seem to have post stalkers.

        In other situations, there have been debates for long now, years for some and the sides are entrenched, as in the drive for the slaughter ban debates.

        As someone mentioned, horse people are very opinionated, to the point that two horse people sometimes gets you three different opinions.

        Best way to handle that, scroll thru the posts you don't care for, easier on your blood pressure and saves time.


        • #5
          I do not see this as a situation that is specific to horses or horse forums. Any large group of people is likely to have some people who do not agree (or just get along as you call it).

          Life would be very boring if we all thought the exact same thing all the time.


          • Original Poster

            Perfect example! What a timely post


            • #7
              I do think the board has become more contentious and less "helpful" over the past few years. I used to participate more often, but it seems these days the most innocent comment can draw venom rather than helpful suggestions. Years ago, when I was a new farm owner, I got a lot of help from so many knowledgeable people on this forum. Sadly now I see that when some ask for help they get a lot of responses along the lines of, "If you don't know even these basics, you should not own a farm, have a horse, etc."

              However -- I think this is a reflection of our whole country. Sometimes I think we all must have drunk the same Kool-Aid and almost instantly forgot how to carry on civil discourse. What used to be a polite discussion turns into name-calling and polarizing. For example (not trying to start a fight), on a long-standing thread on this board, people are being characterized as either crazy animal rights activists out to destroy people's rights to own animals ... or as cruel abusers who think ownership = right to torture. Somewhere we've lost the ability to claim Middle Earth. Like -- yes, I think you should be able to own a horse and use it responsibly, however, I do not think your "property rights" are inalienable and do not give you permission to treat your horses cruelly, to intentionally injure them for your own pleasure. That seems like a reasonable Middle Earth position to me ... but untenable to those who want to polarize every issue and misunderstand the concept of an idea "taken to its logical conclusion."


              • #8
                People will type what they would never say in person. I have seen it on all boards, Facebook, email, etc...

                Human nature. If you take the facial reactions away, we all feel like we can freely write a 'letter to the editor type message (remember the livelier versions of those in the newspaper?). The only difference is that the reactions are swifter.
                “Pray, hope, and don't worry.”

                St. Padre Pio


                • #9
                  i'm kinda bitchy this morning--i'll fight with ya if ya want!
                  what about?
                  politics? nah, religion, nope.
                  oh, how about SEX? i love that!

                  and welcome to coth btw!


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by suz View Post
                    oh, how about SEX? i love that!


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by King's Ransom View Post
                      I do think the board has become more contentious and less "helpful" over the past few years. I used to participate more often, but it seems these days the most innocent comment can draw venom rather than helpful suggestions.
                      Yep – and for whatever reasons, there are “hot button” topics that are sure to bring out arguing and general rudeness.

                      “Hooves” – shoes, trims, hoof issues, you name it – give the thread a little while, and it will most likely turn NASTY.

                      Same goes for “slaughter” or any issue remotely related – that can be de-railed and end up about slaughter.
                      Last edited by Appsolute; May. 13, 2013, 04:39 PM.
                      APPSOLUTE CHOCKLATE - Photo by Kathy Colman


                      • #12
                        That's the truth. Hooves and slaughter seem to be the really hot topics on here. I try to stay away, alas I did try to ask questions in the last thread that got derailed to slaughter and some decided to try and flame or put me down. Only asking for simple knowledge and trying to put out flames but I get flamed. Lol I learned my lesson. No matter what you say in those threads you will get burned by some. Yet, we are all different and not everyone is going to love all and that's the world. I try to give everyone the benefit of the doubt ESP when they are on a bb and i don't know them in person.
                        Horses aren't our whole life, but makes our life whole


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Char View Post
                          Welcome to COTH! Comment where you have something useful, argue a point where you feel the need, and for the rest just sit back and enjoy the show.

                          As horse people, we're all our own brand of crazy. Just some more than others.
                          This ^^ is very true. I however have the most annoying habit of just orphaning my comments much to a few peeps annoyance. If you care (Sometimes I do) about your comments than subscribe to the thread since some will pm you the venom while others expect you to follow the thread and respond to their venom. For true help I tend to pm the person I want help from.
                          Adoring fan of A Fine Romance
                          Originally Posted by alicen:
                          What serious breeder would think that a horse at that performance level is push button? Even so, that's still a lot of buttons to push.


                          • Original Poster

                            This is funny. I think I would like to fight about sex! Here's a question we can have a bitch test about. Sex or ride your horse? Hmm lemme set up the sitch by saying its been awhile for either... GO!


                            • Original Poster

                              Bitch fest sorry auto correct


                              • #16
                                Just stay away from anything with slaughter or parelli (or really anything Natural Horsemanship related), in the title and you'll be okay.

                                Seriously though I have got some great advice and learned a lot from certain posters/threads. Others I avoid like the plague.
                                Last edited by Event4Life; May. 13, 2013, 01:48 PM. Reason: grammar
                                "Choose to chance the rapids, and dare to dance the tides" - Garth Brooks
                                "With your permission, dear, I'll take my fences one at a time" - Maggie Smith, Downton Abbey


                                • #17
                                  Sometimes even giving a suggestion that could save time and major money is also met with snark.
                                  Welcome to COTH!! LOL
                                  The problem with political jokes is that they get elected.
                                  H. Cate


                                  • #18
                                    Here are the topics most likely to cause a train wreck, in no particular order:

                                    -fat chicks in breeches
                                    -skinny chicks, especially in demin breeches "striking a pose"
                                    -Parelli and other natural horsemanship "gurus"
                                    -women with kids
                                    -women without kids
                                    -dogs at the barn/showground/park not on a leash
                                    -not owning dogs
                                    -barefooted horses
                                    -shod horses
                                    -shod on front horses
                                    -marriage, gay and otherwise
                                    -Amish horses
                                    -carriage horses

                                    I'm sure others can (and will) add to the list.

                                    Welcome to COTH. One question, 10,000 opinions.... and maybe 10 are correct.
                                    Alis volat propriis.


                                    • #19
                                      Well, other topics that have a choir of like minded posters include:

                                      Humane Society (COTH is anti-Humane Society)
                                      Question anyone in the pro-carriage industry (on COTH all carriage owners are right and if you question them you are a member of PETA)
                                      Euthanizing a healthy horse (hey, it is your horse and up to you what you do with it, is the COTH view)


                                      • #20
                                        Originally posted by stolen virtue View Post
                                        Well, other topics that have a choir of like minded posters include:

                                        Humane Society (COTH is anti-Humane Society)
                                        Question anyone in the pro-carriage industry (on COTH all carriage owners are right and if you question them you are a member of PETA)
                                        Euthanizing a healthy horse (hey, it is your horse and up to you what you do with it, is the COTH view)
                                        Not everyone will agree with that one.

                                        COTH is not anti-HSUS, plenty of their followers and defenders chime in any time anyone question it.
                                        I would call it an even split on that one at most times.

                                        Carriage, well, COTH has a driving forum, so yes, I hope it is for carriage horses.

                                        On euthanizing a healthy horse, I don't know on that one where anyone stands.

                                        Just remember, there would not be debates without sides, if everyone agreed on any topic on hand.