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Got screwed by a former trainer, now what do I do?

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  • Got screwed by a former trainer, now what do I do?

    Thanks all, for the suggestions. Got just what I needed tonight from a lovely non-horse friend who helped me find an answer.
    Last edited by ponyrider212; Jan. 5, 2013, 03:08 AM. Reason: Regret posting while in an emotional state....

  • #2
    So am I reading this correctly.. Your only complaint about this horse is that he got big?
    "Kindness is free" ~ Eurofoal
    The CoTH CYA - please consult w/your veterinarian under any and all circumstances.


    • #3
      If the horse is nice and sane and you are comfortable on him (other than his height), then I'd say you just need to suck it up and learn to ride him.

      I don't know how you could possibly sue her for misrepresenting him when no one can guarantee how big (or how small!) a young horse is going to end up. If you wanted a horse of a certain size, you should have bought a horse that size.


      • #4
        How did she *know* that? And better yet, how do you *know* that she lied?


        • #5
          Are you working with a trainer you trust now?

          It appears your best options are #1 and #2. If you can get over your "fear of heights", it sounds like he will be fun horse to ride and will eventually make you a better rider.

          However, if you just can't see getting comfortable with him, then you know what to do: sell him to someone who will appreciate him and help him become a solid eq horse or maybe a fun jumper.

          P.S. I hope you learned to not let one person stay in 100% control of such an important purchase...
          Proud owner of a Slaughter-Bound TB from a feedlot, and her surprise baby...!


          • #6
            Just sell him and buy something smaller. A horse just as nice, that only measures 15.3 hands, will probably be worth a lot less. You'll still end up ahead of the game.
            Why must you chastise my brilliant idea with facts and logic? **picks up toys (and wine) and goes home**


            • #7
              how old was the horse when you bought it?

              Aside from being had, I am not sure where your grievance is...since taller horses usually sell better, for more (I am guessing you are Hunter rider though....where everything is supposed to be within a narrow margin)

              What can I tell you....my sister was barely 5'4", had a mare that was from a pairing of two glorified ponies make it easily to 16 1/2 hands (and that was just the front!) the colt she kept from breeding her surpassed the 17h mark with the greatest of ease!
              Breeding/raising young stock is a crap shoot. Most people would prefer to have your problem though, the market is better.

              I am guessing there was more that got your dander up than a horse being a few inches to tall, but I don't think you got much of a recourse there.

              In the meantime, while you make up your mind, I guess your best course of action is to improve the equitation...or rather relax while you do it.


              • #8
                Eqtrainer: I don't think the main point of this post was to complain about how tall the horse is(although it does bother the OP). I think the actual point was to complain about how sucky some people can be.

                OP, I know what it feels like to have a horse misrepresented and have a trainer lie to you. It totally sucks!

                But if I were in your situation I would take it as an opportunity to learn and I'd keep the horse. He seems like a nice boy, and if your only complaint is that you feel too small on him--then that's less of a complaint than a lot of people have. Have fun with him and forget about your ex-trainer!!
                http://www.youtube.com/user/NBChoice http://nbchoice.blogspot.com/
                The New Banner's Choice- 1994 ASB Mare
                Dennis The Menace Too- 1999 ASB Gelding
                Dreamacres Sublime- 2008 ASB Gelding


                • #9
                  If he is that nice, can you sell him and buy something nice, but smaller? if he is that nice, surely he will fetch a pretty penny?
                  I get the size thing. I like smaller horses too.


                  • #10
                    Well... geez... poor horse.. you want him out of your sight because he grew too tall? because you made the mistake to trust the wrong person?? You better sell the horse indeed and find a pony... then you may complain he did not grow as tall as told...
                    Poor horse. I don't feel the love for the horse and you probably do not deserve him.


                    • #11
                      No, I think too big and the green element makes him harder to ride, I'm assuming collect. I am also assuming he is a WB and yes 17.1 is a large boy.

                      I would sell him, yes you were lied to but atleast he is sound. It also does not sound like you are that emotionally attached to him, so it would make sense to find another horse you enjoy riding.


                      • #12
                        I'll take him!! I have a 17.2 hand TB and I'm the same height as you, I honestly feel more comfortable on him than I do a horse that's around 15 hands. I'll totally take him! Hell I'll even go shopping for a new for you with you!
                        But in all seriousness if he's got a great mind, he's healthy and he's trained. Keep him.
                        ((Offer still stands though, if you really don't want him send him on my way ))


                        • #13
                          I think if you have a definite height limit,, then you buy a mature animal. Case in point, I prefer a smaller horse. I am small and have an old broken neck. I prefer 15.3 or under. I adopted a horse that was 3 and barefly 15 hands. Figured I was safe height wise. Nope, TBs grow for a long time and he ended up 16.1 1/2.. I know I was one of the few people on the planet who was disappointed he kept growing. He was retired early due to injury and lives happily on my farm. My current riding horse is maybe 15.3. It is hard to accept that you have been lied to, but if he is as nice as you say, try to find a trainer that will help you feel comfortable wit his size. If not, you will make more money as a resale with his size and should be well able to afford a horse you like in a smaller size. Most people want big.


                          • #14
                            Who told you that the trainer lied to the breeder? Don't you see the holes here?


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by ponyrider212 View Post
                              Okay, so here's a what-would-you-do or tell-me-what-I-should-do conundrum. Forgive me if this becomes a novel...

                              Back in 2008, I was in the market for a new horse, since my equitation horse was having suspensory issues, and it looked like he would not be a candidate for continuing his jumping career. My trainer at that time was representing some horses for a warmblood breeder a few thousand miles away. I had seen some of the breeder's horses, and knew she had some nice young stock.

                              My trainer talked to the breeder to see if she had anything appropriate for me. She came back and told me that the breeder had a sensible, sane young horse that sounded like a good fit. She told me the breeder said the horse would finish out at 16.1, maybe 16.2 tops.

                              I am small, 5'4" and around 115 or so, and have never liked riding anything over that height. I feel most comfortable on ponies on up to 16.1 or so, and my trainer knew that. She knew that I had never seriously ridden anything larger than that, and knew that I would never consider buying anything taller than 16.2. She told me the breeder didn't talk to buyers, only trainers, and forbade me through the whole thing to contact the breeder directly, so I couldn't verify anything. At the time, I trusted my trainer, and believed she was acting in my best interests.

                              I bought the horse, who was everything my trainer said the breeder told her he'd be, sane, sensible, a decent mover, and very trainable. Flash forward to the present day, and the horse is now hovering between 17 and 17.1 hands, and has a year left of growing. He's sensible enough that I backed him and have done 95% of the training myself, but I have always felt like his height is too much for me. As he continued to grow, I thought that the breeder had been off about his height, and that it was just one of those things.

                              I left my trainer almost 3 years ago, and in that time, have found out that she was not honest with me on a number of occasions in regard to other dealings. I found out today that not only did she out and out lie to me about how tall my horse would grow, she also lied to the breeder about what I was looking for, and told her that I was looking for a taller horse.

                              Now, I feel absolutely sick to my stomach, and realized that my former trainer completely took me for a ride. I'm sure she figured that she would get the commission on the sale from the breeder, get paid to do the training rides, etc, and then get a commission on a sale on the other side because he was too big for me. Mind you, this was the third horse I bought through her, so she certainly made enough cash off me in the 4 years I rode with her.

                              I love this horse's personality, and he's the first I've taken from zero to everything, which is very special. BUT, after 3 years, I don't feel comfortable with the size of his stride, and that on top of his green-ness, makes me feel like I've taken about 1,000 steps backward in my own riding. Add to that my trainer's deception, and I just want to ship this animal off to the glue factory to get him out of my sight. (Disclaimer: that is an emotional overreaction, of course, and I would never actually do that to the poor boy. It's not his fault that some people really suck.)

                              Issues: I will never be able to afford anything as nice as he is ever again. He has a top-notch brain, and if I ever felt comfortable riding him, I'd be able to enjoy him. It just hasn't happened yet.

                              My options are:

                              1) Keep him, and to try to figure how the hell to ride him happily, if I can teach this middle-aged rider-dog some new tricks.

                              2) Sell him, and find something less nice but that makes me feel more relaxed in the saddle.

                              3) Try like hell to find a reasonable trade for something of equal value.

                              I did let the breeder know that the horse had been misrepresented to me height-wise (and also breeding-wise on the bill of sale, but that's a whole other bag of worms) by my trainer. Other than wishing my former trainer would rot in hell for her deception, I assume there is no action I can take in the matter. I'd like to sue my trainer for at least the purchase price of the horse, but I don't know if that would even be feasible, since there's nothing in writing about her misrepresentation of his size to me.

                              Any thoughts, advice, guidance, even sympathy would be most appreciated. Thank you for reading this whole saga!
                              For the record.


                              • #16
                                How old was the horse when you bought him? I don't know that anyone can guarantee that a horse will (or will not) reach a certain height so that was the first mistake made here.


                                • #17
                                  You need to suck it up. If you don't like the horse because of his size, sell him and get something else. If a horse is otherwise perfect, I sure wouldn't get rid of it because of size, but that's me. I, too, feel a bit sorry for the horse.

                                  No one can accurately predict how big (or small) a horse is going to get. You can get a rough idea from the size of the parents, but it's no guarantee. If size was that important to you, you should have bought one that was already fully grown.


                                  • #18
                                    I get that you think you were lied to. Although I would caution you against necessarily believing that people remember conversations like that accurately, from four years ago. Predicting horse height is hardly a science.

                                    The reason I asked for clarification is that if in the big scheme of things that is your only complaint about this horse? You should really try to get some perspective. Sound, fancy, trainable and big is super easy to sell. What I would caution you against is thinking smaller will be easier, or as sound, or as trainable. I hope it is, but often the devil you know..

                                    Good luck.
                                    "Kindness is free" ~ Eurofoal
                                    The CoTH CYA - please consult w/your veterinarian under any and all circumstances.


                                    • #19
                                      You need to suck it up. If you don't like the horse because of his size, sell him and get something else. If a horse is otherwise perfect, I sure wouldn't get rid of it because of size, but that's me. I, too, feel a bit sorry for the horse.

                                      No one can accurately predict how big (or small) a horse is going to get. You can get a rough idea from the size of the parents, but it's no guarantee. If size was that important to you, you should have bought one that was already fully grown.


                                      • #20
                                        I'm reading this as she's mostly disappointed in the fact that she got hosed by trainer, which is making her angry, and her anger is projected at the horse, who is the reason she got hosed. and the fact that he's bigger than she's comfortable with.

                                        mostly she's angry she was lied to. which is completely understandable and appropriate.