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Spinoff: Best/Worst horse names ever!

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  • I just had to bump this thread after finding out the registered name of the little mare I'm getting: Monoco Lewinsky. Who says race horse folks don't have a twisted since of humor?
    One cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not dined well. - Virginia Woolf


    • When I was like 6, I wanted to name a horse "Flower Swan." It was going to be dapple grey and the whole bit. I told my 6yo horsey friend this and she was like, "FLOWER SWAN? "

      Cut to the following winter, where I was standing around at an inbarn show watching a dapple grey horse go in the ring, and it was announced that its name was Flower Swan.

      And in that moment, I realized how awful that name was.

      I also give all my horses "Indian names." These names aren't officially thought out, they just make an appearance one day and stick. So my Oldenburg who gets cold easily is called "Stands There and Shakes," and my ottb for obvious reason is "Grunts When He Poops."
      I had a student that was lessoning on him a while and she wanted to take him in a few local shows. I said, "Sure, but you have to use his Indian name, because if you ride in on a name like that you sure as mcshizzle will know you better RIDE to not get laughed out the ring."
      The Noodlehttp://tiny.cc/NGKmT&http://tiny.cc/gioSA
      Boy Wonderhttp://tiny.cc/G9290
      The Hana is nuts! NUTS!!http://tinyurl.com/SOCRAZY


      • I'll never stop complaining about both my OTTB's registered names.

        Inky Dinky. speaks for itself. no, just no, although we kept Inky as a barn name. Confuses everyone because he's a chestnut.
        Red Wrecker. for a potential hunter. visions of jumps strewn about the arena dancing in my head. I was thinking of a new name for him as we pulled away from the backside.

        Daughter's first pony came with the barn name Nag.
        Arabian called Dude.

        You bet, I changed them all!
        Lowly Farm Hand with Delusions of Barn Biddieom.
        Witherun Farm


        • I have had a few horses with names i really loved,

          Sunstorm was the best, he was a liver chestnut, or looked like one, until the sun shone on hiim, and then he had a thousand golden flecks in his coat.

          Then i had Red Shadow, which i liked,

          my two favorite thoroughbreds were In Full FLight, and Acheval. (achieval)
          then there was the pony named Miss Chivvers ( Mischievous)

          and a stud named "dont call me sue"

          i like inventive names and usually try not to change names of the horses i get, if they have had them for a while


          • I think I have shared this before but.......

            My friend's Standardbred stud (who stands in Indiana and Australia, very popular stud) is called...........

            Always a Virgin

            He is out of a mare called Neverhaveneverwill.



            • I've owned a "Boo's Lady" which looks OK on paper, but if you say it out loud She was an unraced TB with some pretty good bloodlines, and THAT is what they chose to name her.

              And then there was "Bobby's Bubble"

              I don't even know where that came from.


              • Pimp. Awful barn name.

                I like to name my animals after literary characters so I see a Boo Radley in my future...
                No hour of life is wasted that is spent in the saddle. ~Winston Churchill
                For Hope, For Strength, For Life-Delta Gamma
                www.etsy.com/shop/joiedevivrecrafts Custom Wreaths and Other Decorations


                • I've giggled all the way through this thread! However I have recently had a pony move to my barn with the best name ever!!

                  Chicken Nugget

                  At first i just sort of scratched my head but the kids all think it's hysterical (I do too) and he sure does look like a nugget.

                  My mares registered name is Buds Maid of Honey.... ick, she's just Honey... Honey Bee on good days and Honey B*tch on most of the other days :P

                  Friend bought another TWH registered as Cupcake... barn name Baby, He was a manly man though and changed it to Midnight. (she was black, go figure)


                  My last show horse was Parental Advisory, I still like the name. My mom said it should have been "Call the EMT's"
                  Saddle Tree Acres


                  • I have an Appendix gelding named "Fat Dashn Bully" ... And he's not even especially fat.

                    I once owned an OTTB with the god awful name "Peppy Pockets".


                    • Originally posted by skykingismybaby1 View Post
                      I think I have shared this before but.......

                      My friend's Standardbred stud (who stands in Indiana and Australia, very popular stud) is called...........

                      Always a Virgin

                      He is out of a mare called Neverhaveneverwill.

                      He was a nice racehorse - saw him (on TV) in a few high profile races.

                      In the same vein, we cannot forget the great trotting gelding No Sex Please.


                      Ages ago, a friend's mare had a colt and said friend asked each one of his hids what they wanted to call him. The general consensus was they didnt know, so the man named the colt Idno. There also was a man that named his horses things like Squid, Oatbin, and Straw Walker; very odd!!!

                      There was a horse I wanted to buy several years ago named Norfolk And Way.........say it really fast!!!LOL He was a decent racehorse and went cheap but I got my offer in a couple of hours too late
                      Founder of the Dyslexic Clique. Dyslexics of the world - UNTIE!!

                      Member: Incredible Invisbles


                      • Back in the 70's, I had a QH named Star Squaw Bar. What a mouthful! We called her Tinkerbelle.

                        My first dressage horse was an OTTB. Official name: Orlando Motel. I called him Ripple, after the Grateful Dead song (not the wine).


                        • At a barn I boarded at years ago there was a warmblood called "Bastogne" (place in Belgium I think) and a Quarter Horse called "Cigarette".

                          The BM nicknamed them "Bath Sponge" and "Cancer Stick".

                          I knew a grade horse jumper who was a yellow dun. Show name was "Arc of Banana"; barn name "Banana".
                          "Facts or opinions which are to pass through the hands of so many, to be misconceived by folly in one, and ignorance in another, can hardly have much truth left." - Jane Austen: "Persuasion"