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Do you ever just feel like throwing in the towel, and giving up on having horses?

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  • #21
    I almost gave up last year. I got my first horse when I could purchase it myself, so, around 5-6 years ago. I loved her, every bit, even though she wasn't perfect and she taught me so much. I bought my second mare about four years later, she was so sweet, and a rescue, she just instantly won me over. They were my "babies". I had been a horse-girl my whole life and now I finally had two of my own.

    The end of last year my second mare, Sunny, colicked and her stomach ruptured...she couldn't be saved. She was 6. It was terrible.

    Two months later, my heart horse, my first horse, I also had to put down. She had been slowly losing weight for two months and after testing the vet finally determined she had renal failure...she was 8 so it wasn't something we had even really considered.

    I was completely lost. I would have rather had two unsound, unrideable, horses that I could at least rehome or keep as pasture pets then watch the two of them pass away so young. I still tear up just thinking about it. I felt like I had done something wrong.

    I did end up getting another horse...it hasn't been the same, but, I am slowly finding my way again. Now that I am away from him, and will be for the next few months due to a deployment, it really does make me miss it so much more and realize there's no way I could give it all up.

    If you aren't happy, the best case is probably to rehome your mare with someone who just wants a pasture pet or maybe to breed. You can make someone else happy too Good luck with whatever you decide, but please don't give up!!!

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    • #22
      OP, I asked about the PPE...did you have one? So far, as expected, I can only hear crickets.

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      • #23
        Crickets are nice. Very soothing sound ...
        "One person's cowboy is another person's blooming idiot" -- katarine

        Spay and neuter. Please.

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        • Original Poster

          #24
          The pony has had both radiographs and has a wonderful farrier, but thanks for your concern. Calling the vet today for follow up advice, and to get Xrays emailed to me, for a second opinion.
          The Equine Wellness and Nutrition FB Group - Come join us!!
          https://www.facebook.com/groups/equinewellness/

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          • #25
            well..... life is short and if owning a pasture puff is not what you want to do there are folks who are looking for companion animals.... so if you want a horse to ride I would try to find her a happy pasture home and buy yourself a sound animal.

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            • Original Poster

              #26
              Originally posted by LauraKY View Post
              OP, I asked about the PPE...did you have one? So far, as expected, I can only hear crickets.
              You already know the answer to this, so why ask...Oh, wait... never mind. I took the pony in, since she was said to be in dire need of a home, and no one else was stepping forward. Another COTHer years ago, had given one of my ponies a nice home, and I wanted to pay it forward. She was NQR the night she stepped off the trailer, When I started training her, things got worse, so I totally backed off, and called the vet.

              You can say what you want, but I have actually never had a PPE done on any horse I have ever owned.


              I didn't come here desperate for another home for her, or to start a chip in, I mainly just started this thread, because I knew that I wasn't the only one to feel this way.
              The Equine Wellness and Nutrition FB Group - Come join us!!
              https://www.facebook.com/groups/equinewellness/

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              • #27
                I would not encourage you to breed. This is an unpapered, unproven, possibly lame horse. There are plenty of sound, trained horses in low end auctions and we know how that story ends. Please don't add to the problem.
                I saw the angel in the marble and I set him free. - Michaelangelo

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                • #28
                  I did throw in the towel at least on owning any more riding horses. I sold my "dream" show gelding last summer when I found out I needed to have a total knee replacement and knew I was in for a long recovery and quite frankly was tired of having to change disciplines over and over again to suit either a NQR somewhat lame horse (I've had several over the past two decades) or a NQR somewhat lame rider (I had to honest with myself that I was never going to be quite what I used to be).

                  I kept my semi retired (and sound) 22 year old fjord gelding for my son who now rides and I started doing research on minis, then driving, then more minis, then more driving and now I own two lovely experienced and extensively shown miniature geldings who I adore. Yeah they are horses and they can go lame too but I have to admit I've done more with them in the last six months and had more fun doing it all than for the past six years with my riding horses. Sometimes you have to take a step back and let life show you another path. Not saying you should give up riding especially if it brings you great joy but it may be time to move on to another horse who is better suited to what you want to do and what brings you joy.

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                  • #29
                    Originally posted by Freebird! View Post

                    You can say what you want, but I have actually never had a PPE done on any horse I have ever owned.
                    And how's that working out for you?

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                    • #30
                      Originally posted by Grace67 View Post
                      ...or a NQR somewhat lame rider (I had to honest with myself that I was never going to be quite what I used to be).

                      It's a royal pain when you finally realize that, isn't it??



                      I kept my semi retired (and sound) 22 year old fjord gelding for my son who now rides and I started doing research on minis, then driving, then more minis, then more driving and now I own two lovely experienced and extensively shown miniature geldings who I adore. Yeah they are horses and they can go lame too but I have to admit I've done more with them in the last six months and had more fun doing it all than for the past six years with my riding horses. Sometimes you have to take a step back and let life show you another path. Not saying you should give up riding especially if it brings you great joy but it may be time to move on to another horse who is better suited to what you want to do and what brings you joy.
                      I'm telling you, the minis have taken my area by storm. There was a big seizure a while back and then an auction last week or so and quite a few people from here snagged a bunch. They've made a local group which seems very active. Cutest little boogers you've ever seen. Almost makes me rethink the mini route for myself.
                      GR24's Musing #19 - Save the tatas!!

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                      • #31
                        This is what I kept telling my husband I was going to do the last time I was horse hunting and getting frustrated - buy a couple of minis and just drive.

                        My last horse almost made me quit (a spotted saddle horse). It turned out he had Wobbler's Syndrome, but it took 5 years before we figured out what was wrong. Level 1 or 2 is hard to diagnose in a trotting horse, even harder in a gaited horse. I spent tons of money on trainers and vets. Wobbler's horses don't just have trouble moving, they have no energy and very little feeling in their bodies. I couldn't ride without a dressage whip; there was no way to train this horse to respond to the leg because he actually couldn't feel it. He refused to canter more than a few strides. We had blood tests done to find out if he was anemic, sick, etc. We couldn't get him to gait, only pace, unless he was going up hill (they can't use their hind ends). I think I went through five trainers.

                        I finally trailered him to a vet's clinic to have his stifles checked. She quickly figured out he had a neurological problem and x-rayed his neck and saw the compression spots. It took about 3 months to get it through my head that he needed to be put down, Wobbler's horses fall down a lot and if I put him out to pasture he eventually would have injured himself.

                        I wasn't sure if I wanted another horse. While he was a great trail horse, he wasn't fun to ride because it was such a battle to get him to do anything. Everyone blamed me for his laziness, not responding to leg, etc., all his problems. I've been riding for 30 years, this really wrecked my confidence as a rider and took the fun out of riding. After I put him down I took a two months' break from riding, I didn't even bother riding friends' horses.

                        Yes, I did have a PPE. The condition showed up, but the vet said the week hind end was probably due to his being gaited and out of shape. If I knew about Wobbler's, I never would have bought him.

                        Ack! Long rant, sorry.

                        Originally posted by Grace67 View Post
                        I kept my semi retired (and sound) 22 year old fjord gelding for my son who now rides and I started doing research on minis, then driving, then more minis, then more driving and now I own two lovely experienced and extensively shown miniature geldings who I adore. Yeah they are horses and they can go lame too but I have to admit I've done more with them in the last six months and had more fun doing it all than for the past six years with my riding horses. Sometimes you have to take a step back and let life show you another path. Not saying you should give up riding especially if it brings you great joy but it may be time to move on to another horse who is better suited to what you want to do and what brings you joy.
                        In memory of Apache, who loved to play. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MjZAqeg7HyE

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                        • Original Poster

                          #32
                          Thanks guys. I think I have found a great solution that will be a good thing for all involved. Basically, I'll be trading a pony for her, on a temporary basis. My vet has been contacted though, since I would still like to explore other options - stall rest, injections, etc? I probably won't be posting any more updates about her though because, honestly, I am tired of trying to explain myself to the same two posters over and over. And yes, the not ever getting PPE's has worked quite well for me, and I have been able to retrain and rehab quite a few horses and ponies over the years.

                          I am certainly not the first COTHer, or horse owner to not get Xrays on a horse before I buy/adopt it. Of course in hindsight, I WISH the filly had come to me sound, but to be honest, if I had to do it all over, I woudl still have taken the filly. Why? Because had she gone to someone else, they may not have caught the lameness, and they may have started her in training, before having Xrays done, and they may have just slapped shoes on her, instead of really getting to the root of her feet issue. So, for that reason, I am very glad I got her. She has a wonderful personality, and is truly my therapy. Even, my non horsey husband had grown to really love her.
                          The Equine Wellness and Nutrition FB Group - Come join us!!
                          https://www.facebook.com/groups/equinewellness/

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                          • #33
                            Hey... horse could have suddenly been NQR once it hit the trailer and sound for its old owner. Such is life with these guys. I haven't done a PPE either, but the issues I have been bitten by would never have shown up except in my rescue... and he needed to come home with me no matter what so what did it matter. For the record, I do reccomend a PPE... do as I say not as I do.

                            But when we do not do one... we accept the horse may be sound or lame, underlying issues or no and we work with that. It has to be the mentality IMO. I luckily can retire my horses if they go lame... which is why I can gamble.

                            Anyway... is there any chance you can afford a third horse? Even borrowing one short term so you can enjoy yourself and get some riding in while you figure out what is up with the pony?

                            I know it has been a hard year... I hope it gets easier and you get a sound horse for 2013.
                            Last edited by magicteetango; Dec. 19, 2012, 05:35 PM. Reason: Omg auto correct!

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                            • Original Poster

                              #34
                              My filly flexed sound, for the vet, so the only way she would've "failed" a PPE was if Xrays had been taken of her hock - and only then at a certain angle. The Xrays showed an OLD - as in yearling or younger - injury. When the vet came, I trotted her in hand, and lunged her for the vet, and he thought she looked fine, but he trusted my hunch, that something was wrong with the right hind, so he did the Xrays.

                              Of course, like you Magic, I have ALWAYS recommended to my clients, that getting a PPE is a must have. For horses that I have bought, I do always ride them, watch them being ridden, go over them with a fine tooth comb, and yes, I do flex them.

                              I could afford a third horse, but I think the solution I found will be just as good. She will be well loved, and my kids and I, in turn will have a fun pony to ride for a while - who is right now, not really being ridden much - and I'm not having to sell her. Win/win!
                              Last edited by Freebird!; Dec. 19, 2012, 06:01 PM. Reason: for clarity and spelling errors.
                              The Equine Wellness and Nutrition FB Group - Come join us!!
                              https://www.facebook.com/groups/equinewellness/

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                              • #35
                                It can be hard enough to find a suitable horse when we cross all the "T's" and dot all the "i's". Why would anyone take a chance on a horse without getting some type of PPE done?

                                I get the whole free thing, and wanting to keep costs down. But...even a quick flexion test might have been enough to A) make the OP rethink the decision to take the horse, or B) avoid being surprised by later problems. Most vets will honor a dollar limit on PPE costs when it is discussed before hand, and will only mention radiographs when they see red flags.

                                If my decisions were impacting the quality of my horse life, I would change the way I make those decisions before I gave up on horses. Of course, if I couldn't catch a break and continued to end up with lame horses that I had actually paid for and had vetted before I handed the money over...then I might start to question how much I was willing to put up with! But free horses that I didn't vet? Not so much.
                                Sheilah

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                                • #36
                                  I wanted to give up horses when my heart horse passed away seven years ago. In fact, if I hadn't already owned my current mare prior to my heart horse's death, I probably would have given them up. It was a long time before I could even enjoy horses again, but it was worth sticking with them.

                                  I have nothing to add re: the OP's pony, but good luck to you, OP. Sounds like you've had a really rough year and I hope things get better for you.
                                  *Wendy* 4.17.73 - 12.20.05

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                                  • #37
                                    Only in the winter. Today, for example, it was 17 degrees when I went out to feed.

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                                    • #38
                                      Originally posted by Freebird! View Post

                                      You can say what you want, but I have actually never had a PPE done on any horse I have ever owned.


                                      .
                                      I thought I was the only one who had NEVER had A PPE done.
                                      I see, I fall in love, I buy and THEN I have the vet check 'em over.
                                      Fortunately so far I've been lucky and they've all been sound and healthy.
                                      The two I have now will be my last horses so I guess I beat the odds.
                                      You know why cowboys don't like Appaloosas?" - Answer: Because to train a horse, you have to be smarter than it is.

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                                      • #39
                                        Originally posted by Freebird! View Post
                                        You already know the answer to this, so why ask...Oh, wait... never mind. I took the pony in, since she was said to be in dire need of a home, and no one else was stepping forward.
                                        There's no way to tell what the other options were, but I seem to recall that this filly generated a lot of interest here on the giveaway forum, and it appears as though there was at least one other offer to take her. So this statement seems a little misleading to me, given the information available. http://www.chronofhorse.com/forum/sh...S**-Home-Found!
                                        "In order to really enjoy a dog, one doesn’t merely train him to be semi-human. The point of it is to open oneself to the possibility of becoming part dog."
                                        -Edward Hoagland

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                                        • #40
                                          Originally posted by pj View Post
                                          I thought I was the only one who had NEVER had A PPE done.
                                          I see, I fall in love, I buy and THEN I have the vet check 'em over.
                                          Fortunately so far I've been lucky and they've all been sound and healthy.
                                          The two I have now will be my last horses so I guess I beat the odds.
                                          I never have. But most of the time, I deal in horses that you put on the trailer and drive away ASAP. Few sale contracts, paper trails, or even names. You want it, you go get it with cash and a trailer and don't ask too many questions while you're there.

                                          Every time I do that, I go in knowing EXACTLY how much I can afford to lose. If I can't take that risk, I don't take the animal. I can't say I've ever wanted completely out of horses altogether - out from under a horse I didn't click with, yes - but never permanently.

                                          I'm confused as to how the OP's horse is lame if the vet thought she looked "fine" until seeing xrays of the hock. But it sounds like you've found a solution either way.

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