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Help with tactfully getting out of a very sticky situation.HOW IT ENDED PAGE 17

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  • Original Poster

    Originally posted by ddashaq View Post
    I completely agree. If there is ever a Kentucky get together I hope that I get to meet you and LSM1212.
    Totally would love to meet up sometime as well!!!
    ___._/> I don't suffer from insanity.. I enjoy every
    ____/ minute of it! Member stick horse art lovers
    ';;;;;;; clique
    //__\\<-- Don't feed the llama!

    Comment


    • Originally posted by nightsong View Post
      I think "bitch" means they just don't understand where you're coming from .

      When someone calls you a bitch it means you are being aggressive, doing your job as well or better than any man, and doing the best in any situation. It's a compliment, altho it isn't meant as such.

      Comment


      • *shrug* I thought it just meant a female dog. I have 2 of them... I don't mind being compared to them as they are fabulous! Better than the male dog we have.

        Comment


        • Yo, my bitch is awesome!

          B eing
          I n
          T otal
          C harge (of)
          H erself

          It's sort of like being called a lover of one's own sex as an insult. Hmmm. Okay, I know a lot of really wonderful folks who love their own sex in an intimate way. So why is being called one supposed to be an insult? Because I'm not insulted - more amused that it's supposed to be an insult. And basically it all boils down to you not doing what they want.
          Delicious strawberry flavored death!

          Comment

          • Original Poster

            Well I am feeling like a glutton for punishment and thought I would let all know how this turned out so far.

            Parent A and B have both left my trainers barn to lesson with my crooked ex-trainer,

            The pony is now up on Craigslist for a 1/2 lease (don't know which parent wants out of the deal but seeing as the ad says the pony calls for an "experieced rider" and the wording of the ad I am guessing Parent B. (the one with the little kid. )

            Parent B left first for crooked ex-trainer because she said she would have 6yo jumping courses by this season, as of last show kid had to pull out of crossrails classes due to pony taking off and has been switched to a double twisted wire snaffle bit. and kid has been downgraded to only poles on the ground. (funny my trainer told parent that kid wasn't ready to jump either and that is why he got mad and left *shurg*

            At last show Parent A's younger kid was also getting run off with on same pony and the pony still does not have lead changes which I am "told" is a problem in the Eq Classes.

            Parent A did for a while have 1 kid lessoning with ex-trainer and one with my trainer but just recently went completely back to ex-trainer because her oldest daughter was ready to "get serious with her riding" They are now in the market for a horse to do the Maclay's with this year.. so if anyone knows of a MaClay's horse for under $10,000 let me know

            Funny thing was Parent A was offered a nice free lease on a nice warmblood mare that HAD done the MacClays and placed at my barn but evidently she wasn't "nice enough" and ex-trainer will find them one to buy. (this after they went "halfsies" on a $4000 pony but whatever.

            So neither parent is at my barn any longer, both are back with crooked ex-trainer letting her blow smoke up their arse. Pony for lease and Parent B looking for another ride as well.

            So it all turned out about like I expected. But I dont' have to listen to the drama anymore or run into them at the barn. Only at the shows (which I don't go to that often )
            ___._/> I don't suffer from insanity.. I enjoy every
            ____/ minute of it! Member stick horse art lovers
            ';;;;;;; clique
            //__\\<-- Don't feed the llama!

            Comment


            • Thanks for the update... I don't watch soap operas, because real-life horse drama is so much more entertaining sometimes. (:
              "Remain relentlessly cheerful."

              Graphite/Pastel Portraits

              Comment


              • So, why is it that I go to maybe 2 hunter shows a year and I run into (literally, head on) your ex-trainer at both of them??? And why is ex-trainer still working, when everyone who hears the name rolls their eyes and says stay away (including Indiana folks)??? And, why can't I go to my own barn without running into (again, literally, in the viewing room) said ex-trainer???? Oh well, I have decided to start meditating and to remember that what goes around comes around....in the mean time, let's root for U of L's equestrian team at their first show as hosts with their new coach!!!

                Comment


                • Thanks for the update - I was just thinking about this thread the other day.

                  Now all we need is the conclusion to the nice girl/naughty pregnant girl/bad boy love triangle thread and I think I will have the answers to all my COTH Soaps....

                  Well except Crayola Trainer but I fear that was cancelled without the writers having a chance to wrap things up!

                  Comment


                  • Horse-loverz--you know that karma and coincidence being what they are that since you said they you'll only run into A and B plus kids at shows that you will immediately start running into them everywhere.

                    Thanks for the update, and did anyone else think this was exactly how it would happen? I hope your current trainer has decided to never take them back considering they were such a pain in the neck and definitely a walking legal liability.
                    You can't fix stupid-Ron White

                    Comment

                    • Original Poster

                      Originally posted by CallMeGrace View Post
                      So, why is it that I go to maybe 2 hunter shows a year and I run into (literally, head on) your ex-trainer at both of them??? And why is ex-trainer still working, when everyone who hears the name rolls their eyes and says stay away (including Indiana folks)??? And, why can't I go to my own barn without running into (again, literally, in the viewing room) said ex-trainer???? Oh well, I have decided to start meditating and to remember that what goes around comes around....in the mean time, let's root for U of L's equestrian team at their first show as hosts with their new coach!!!
                      I have no idea how she is even in business other than the fact that she still talks a good game. Or the fact that she said they were only going to do A shows but have been only to the "local" shows this year. I know they were at the barn you board at looking for that elusive inexpensive "McClay horse" for one of the kids. I know everyone rolls their eyes at her and say's stay away but she does pray on the nieve and uninformed. and Parent A continues to wear blinders. She should know better but whatever.

                      I mean Ex-Trainer cheated over almost all of her clients when she lost her lease on her last farm and even burned that bridge with the BO by cancelling her last rent check and letting it bounce.. then leaving a horse behind to starve that someone had let her use. Tack on to what she did to me with My horse All of which Parent A and B know about so I have no idea why anyone would want to do business with her. She is as dirty as they come.
                      She also very blatently doped the pony at one of the local shows but evidently people looked the other way. She wouldn't get away with it at a rated show though.

                      I will be rooting for U of L with their new coach!!! And am glad the drama has left the barn!!
                      ___._/> I don't suffer from insanity.. I enjoy every
                      ____/ minute of it! Member stick horse art lovers
                      ';;;;;;; clique
                      //__\\<-- Don't feed the llama!

                      Comment

                      • Original Poster

                        Originally posted by JanM View Post
                        Horse-loverz--you know that karma and coincidence being what they are that since you said they you'll only run into A and B plus kids at shows that you will immediately start running into them everywhere.

                        Thanks for the update, and did anyone else think this was exactly how it would happen? I hope your current trainer has decided to never take them back considering they were such a pain in the neck and definitely a walking legal liability.
                        Well you may be right but I live a considerable distance from them so I don't really run the risk of "about the town" meetings. But I know I will see them at any shows I go to. Again I don't think Parent A is a bad person just really really really gullable, and fell what whatever line of Bull ex-trainer threw at them.
                        ___._/> I don't suffer from insanity.. I enjoy every
                        ____/ minute of it! Member stick horse art lovers
                        ';;;;;;; clique
                        //__\\<-- Don't feed the llama!

                        Comment


                        • Well it's all going to be your fault when those 2 or 3 kids don't make it to the Olympics! (See Winston/Tommy thread)

                          Let's hear it for girl dogs, girl dogs are smarter than boy dogs!!!

                          Comment

                          • Original Poster

                            LOL yes it will be all my fault but I can live with that. It amazes me though how people don't want an honest opinion, they only want to hear the good stuff and none of the bad even if it will make them a better rider in the end. Oh well ya can't fix stupid I guess
                            ___._/> I don't suffer from insanity.. I enjoy every
                            ____/ minute of it! Member stick horse art lovers
                            ';;;;;;; clique
                            //__\\<-- Don't feed the llama!

                            Comment


                            • Originally posted by CallMeGrace View Post
                              So, why is it that I go to maybe 2 hunter shows a year and I run into (literally, head on) your ex-trainer at both of them??? And why is ex-trainer still working, when everyone who hears the name rolls their eyes and says stay away (including Indiana folks)??? And, why can't I go to my own barn without running into (again, literally, in the viewing room) said ex-trainer???? Oh well, I have decided to start meditating and to remember that what goes around comes around....in the mean time, let's root for U of L's equestrian team at their first show as hosts with their new coach!!!
                              I haven't really been keeping up with this thread, but you have me intrigued. Who is the crazy ex-trainer? I doubt I know them as I do dressage and not h/j, but it's always good to be up on the scoop in case someone asks for a recommendation. PM please!

                              Caitlin
                              Caitlin
                              *OMGiH I Loff my Mare* and *My Saddlebred Can Do Anything Your Horse Can Do*
                              http://community.webshots.com/user/redmare01

                              Comment


                              • Originally posted by horse-loverz View Post
                                OK here's the story..There is a family at the barn where I board that I have known for several years. My daughter has ridden with this lady's girls at several different barns.

                                The lady's girls are 12 and 14 years old, and both are very good riders. The problem is that she has agreed to go in "halfsies" with another parent at the barn on a pony for her 12 yo daughter.

                                Well the child of the other parent (Parent B) s a 6yo beginner rider who is doing the trot poles on the ground at shows. The older kid is doing the 2'6 - 3' hunter and eq classes at shows and is always in the ribbons.

                                When Parent A spoke with me about potentially buying a horse with the other parent I told her I thought it was a bad idea of epic proportions. For one her daughter (the 12yo) likes a very forward horse, doesn't like to use a lot of leg and likes a challenge. The other child is ...well 6 and timid, needs the exact opposite kind of horse. I suggested that they should each look for their respective ponies and forget about going in halves because it can only lead to problems.


                                Well Parent A calls me tonight and tells me that Parent B bought a pony for the girls. An ex-eventer pony.. with "hoof issues" (not sure what those are but that is what parent A is telling me). She is calling me wanting me to help her write up a contract for Parent B to sign to protect "her" interests.

                                Why is she calling me you may ask.. well because when I had bought my horse my now ex-trainer had convinced me to trade "training" my horse in exchange for half-ownership but with me footing all of the bills (full board, farrier, vet insurance all pd by me) . I was stupid and naive to agree to this but not so stupid that I didn't get a contract. Ex- Trainer attempted to sell horse out from under me but due to my contract and good timing I got my horse out free and clear (but not easily) and he is 100% mine again.

                                She figures since I have had experience with what went wrong I would be able to help her protect herself. I told her I thought my idea of not co-owning a horse was the best advice I could give her. But since she had already done it anyway I asked her what she expected out of the deal and boy was I in for a shock.

                                They are going to board the horse at my trainers temporarily per Parent A but plan to move pony soon as she wants the horse closer to her so that her daughter can ride the horse more often. Her daughter will continue to lesson with our trainer at the trainers barn though. This would put the horse quite the distance from the 6yo so her riding time would be cut down. She wants full say on everything to the type of bit horse will need, to when the vet will come, and any shoeing decisions. She only wants the 6yo to ride the horse with only her 12 yo supervising. I asked what the 6yo was going to do if the pony was to be moved about lessoning on their pony.. especially since they both want to show the pony with our trainer. She said that her 12 year old would teach the little girl. . Now this parent knows little to nothing about horse care herself, is actually scared of the horses, so not the type of person that could make educated farrier and vet decisions herself. It sounds like a very one sided deal to me and I told her as much. She just doesn't see it that way. She wants a fancy show pony for daughter but she doesn't want to pay for it I guess.

                                At our previous trainers Parent A was paying full board on 2 ponies that they leased for about 6 months, on top of the lease fees and she still let both girls show every month at the shows, so I can't imagine that full care on 1 horse would be a hardship on them, so I don't see the advantage of "co-owing" a horse at all. The only reason they quit leasing the ponies was due to the fact that she changed trainers and the ponies had to stay with crooked ex-trainers place not due to financial reasons. She had wanted to half-lease my horse but I firmly told her it wasn't a good idea, and I didn't think it would be a good match at all for many reasons and it took my trainer also telling her it was a bad match for her to finally back down from pressing that issue any more.

                                I want to tell her to just let Parent B buy the pony and lease it from Parent B since she already told me her daughter may only fit on it for another year or so. I also want to find a tactful way to show her how one-sided her idea of what "fair" is , and how bad that could be for the 6yo.

                                I can see disaster on the horizon and I want absolutely no part of it at all. I just want to be blissfully ignorant and stay completely out of it but Parent A is like a bulldog now that she has roped me in she will continue to try and hound me until I draw up some sort of contract for her.

                                So I guess what I am asking is for any basic lease agreements that anyone has that I could give to her and have her take to a lawyer to tweak, and/or tactful ways to get out of this situation altogether. I don't want their to be tension at the barn or between us and the kids since we do see them a lot but I can soo see this going bad fast.

                                If you read all of this thank you so much.
                                run- but before you run tell her that the 12yr old is a minor aswell therefore not a trianer and how much does she value her childs life of 6yrs of age
                                and that -- its highly risky as in accidents just waiting to happen andno contract ever written is going to protect her or them as a pair leasing said horse
                                tell her to just have lesson on a schollie from your trainer before the 6yrs old is put off for life as a 12 yr old person hasnt even lived yet and cant possiably know all the facts of life nor in the equine industry that why there are are traners to teach with licenses and laws to abide by and she would or could be liable for any acccident that happened

                                be polite and honest and then say sorry mate its not a game i actually wont to take any part in as in -- committing myself or to be a party off in other words you dont want to know becuase beleive you me if any thing was to happen to either party they will looking for a scape goat and that could be you--

                                Comment


                                • Well, it sounds like it worked out for the best for you and your trainer. Not so much for the pony, but hopefully someone with a clue will get their hands on him eventually. I don't know your ex-trainer since I live in Lexington, but I would say that she and her new again clients are perfect for each other! Glad they are out of your hair.

                                  Comment


                                  • I just heard this info last night. I also heard that ex-trainers horses are no longer at her "facility". She's "partnered" up with someone else and they are at a new location. H-L, I'm sure you know who I'm talking about without posting it.

                                    But glad you don't have to deal w/ any of that anymore. I'm so glad I am where I am. Once I left, all of that drama just disappeared. Been a great 2 years!

                                    Re: Parent A and Parent B's actions after knowing all that they know now about ex-trainer? You can lead a horse to water.....

                                    As the Barn Turns.... my hubby says.

                                    Comment


                                    • Originally posted by lcw579 View Post
                                      Now all we need is the conclusion to the nice girl/naughty pregnant girl/bad boy love triangle thread and I think I will have the answers to all my COTH Soaps....
                                      Oh yeah, whatever happened there?
                                      Yo/Yousolong April 23rd, 1985- April 15th, 2014

                                      http://notesfromadogwalker.com/2012/...m-a-sanctuary/

                                      Comment


                                      • Love As the Barn Turns!! LSM you have a PM!

                                        Comment


                                        • Originally posted by CallMeGrace View Post
                                          Love As the Barn Turns!! LSM you have a PM!
                                          Thanks... I came up with it at first but anytime I tell hubby about the "going on's" he repeats it.

                                          Just sent a PM back.

                                          Comment

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