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What Do You Do With a Drunken Boarder?

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  • What Do You Do With a Drunken Boarder?

    To start things off, I have a friend (who is not me talking about myself in third person) who is the owner of a small local boarding barn.

    The atmosphere there is very casual and non-competitive, the boarders often go on camping/riding trips together, and it's generally extremely low-drama. People helped out with things like unloading hay when it came in, or helping with sick or injured horses, or making sure that everyone who wanted to go on a camping trip had a "ride" for their horse. They have parties during the year, with a live band and dancing, games, etc. Nothing fancy or posh, just fun gatherings for the "barn family."

    One of the boarders there has been a good friend of mine for about seven years, and I often called him my "barn dad." Mid-sixties, retired, and divorced; he just likes to go out and ride, have a few beers, and talk. He used to be a lot of fun.

    There was never any question that he liked his beer, but in the past year he has taken to just sitting on the porch all day, drinking one beer after another, and just getting drunk. And loud. And rude, and obnoxious. . .swearing like a sailor, making nasty remarks to other boarders and to barn staff, and generally unpleasant to be around.

    More recently, he has said and done some things to me personally that have pretty much burned that bridge to nothing. I'm no exception - he has burned just about every bridge he had, including his friendship with the BO. The BO has already gone above and beyond to help him through some tough times in the past, and he has been nothing less than a complete jackass to her.

    The atmosphere of the barn has changed, because no one wants to be around him. People used to stick around after a ride, sit on the porch and shoot the breeze and enjoy each other's company. Now they just get their horse settled in after a ride and go home when he's there. And he's always there.

    With warmer weather here, and kids' camps and programs planned through the summer months, the BO does not want this guy around. He's bad for business.

    She has never had to evict anyone based on their behavior. Her contract requires boarders to give her a month's notice if they are leaving, but I don't know if there is anything in the agreement stating that she is required to give THEM notice to have their horse and belongings off the property.

    Is this something generally done by letter, or phone call, or both? Would the BO be required to go into detail about the reasons why she is telling him to go? Just wondering what she would need to do to cover herself in case he decided to come back and make trouble.
    Please copy and paste this to your signature if you know someone, or have been affected by someone who needs a smack upside the head. Lets raise awareness.

  • #2
    Great. Now I have the song stuck in my head:

    What do you do with a drunken boarder?
    What do you do with a drunken boarder?
    What do you do with a drunken board?
    Early in the morning. . .

    Put him in a boat with the cap'n's daughter. . .

    Sorry, OP, not helpful at all, but you even mentioned "sailor" in your post

    Eileen
    Mad Mare™ Studio
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    • #3
      What do you do with a Drunken Boarder, what do you do with a Drunken Boarder,
      What do you do with a Drunken Boarder, earl-y in the morning?

      Make 'em clean stalls until they're sober, make 'em clean stalls until they're sober, make 'em clean stalls until they're sober,
      ear-ly in the morning!

      That doesn't help you even a little bit, but I just had to.
      I realize that I'm generalizing here, but as is often the case when I generalize, I don't care. ~ Dave Barry

      Comment


      • #4
        Kick the boarder out. Give notice and get rid of boarder.

        I had the other problem: 2 of the BOs I boarded C&C with were alcoholics. And one of those was certifiably crazy as well. A 3rd BO (she leased one barn on someone else's property) drank every day at the barn, but didn't get drunk as far as I could see. The owner of that barn drank every day as well.

        Give notice in writing or by email. Easier to prove if you send a letter certified, return receipt requested. Then you get the green card showing she's been served. For most reasons, BO needs to give a 30 day notice, from time board is due. However, I think being drunk at the barn should constitute a breach of the boarding contract, assuming BO and BM aren't drinking at the barn too, and so the boarder could be told to leave instanter. I'd at least tell her in front of witnesses not to drink at barn or come to barn within X hours after drinking.

        I worked with a lot of alcoholics over the years: Judges, district attorneys and law enforcement. It was not 1/2 as bad as having drunken BOs.

        Comment


        • #5
          I don't understand why this is even a question!

          Of course the BO should evict him. Of course it should be as clear cut and obvious as possible. Why not send a certified letter, in addition to having a face to face conversation preferably early in the day. Of course she should have a plan for making sure the move actually happens.

          She needs to know what her boundaries are, and enforce them!
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          • #6
            Originally posted by SMF11 View Post
            I don't understand why this is even a question!

            Of course the BO should evict him. Of course it should be as clear cut and obvious as possible. Why not send a certified letter, in addition to having a face to face conversation preferably early in the day. Of course she should have a plan for making sure the move actually happens.

            She needs to know what her boundaries are, and enforce them!
            ^^^this^^^^

            Maybe it is just my "dragonlady" reputation talking, but the first time drunk at MY barn would have been the last time. There is a barn down the road from me full of people i have run out of here for less.

            Alcohol & horses (and summer camp kids) DO NOT MIX!

            This is HER reputation on the line - not his! Everyone already knows who he is, but who is she? And what does SHE stand for?
            "If you don't know where you are going, any road will take you there"

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            • #7
              The barn owner has the duty to deal with this problem. And it IS a problem.

              The first step is to follow the terms of the contract (oral or written) on ending the boarding relationship.

              If he refuses to leave then she'll have to call her lawyer to see what state law permits.

              If the behavior is an issue then it may be Public Intoxication under the laws of the state. In TN a conviction for PI can be supported by evidence of the smell of alcohol plus some sort of disruptive behavior. No Breathalzyer is required (but some places do it anyway).

              Another alternative is Criminal Tresspass if the drunk comes back.

              Criminal action does not require hiring a lawyer; it does require compliance with state law (particularly actions by the owner to lay the foundation for Criminal Tresspass) and a call to the sheriff.

              Part of my regular spiel with alcohol violations includes the observation that, "you control the booze or the booze controls you; there is no middle ground." Just about 50 years of education and experience with drunks has lead me to this conclusion.

              The barn owner has to take the action. Perhaps it's time for a "group gathering" to make feelings known.

              G.
              Mangalarga Marchador: Uma Raça, Uma Paixão

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              • #8
                When this drunk boarder leaves the barn, are they driving? A well placed officer may be in order.

                If asked why they are being asked to leave I wouldn't beat around the bush, I would tell them. Bluntly. I have nothing against a drink when the day is done and the horses are tucked in but there is certainly lines that shouldn't be crossed in public.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Mad Mare View Post
                  Great. Now I have the song stuck in my head:

                  What do you do with a drunken boarder?
                  What do you do with a drunken boarder?
                  What do you do with a drunken board?
                  Early in the morning. . .

                  Put him in a boat with the cap'n's daughter. . .

                  Sorry, OP, not helpful at all, but you even mentioned "sailor" in your post

                  Eileen
                  Weigh heigh and up she rises
                  Weigh heigh and up she rises
                  Weigh heigh and up she rises
                  Early in the morning

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Sounds like this guy's personality has changed in step with the drinking. That may be a symptom of the drinking. Or, the drinking and the personality change may be symptoms of a medical problem, like a series of mini -strokes or early onset of dementia. Either way, it's inappropriate behavior that the BO needs to address. But a medical workup would be a good idea if someone could convince him to go.

                    Disclaimer : I have no medical training at all. The above is based on personal experience and may be completely irrelevant to the situation at hand.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Put him in the scuppers with the hose pipe on him.
                      Put him in the scuppers with the hose pipe on him.
                      Put him in the scuppers with the hose pipe on him.
                      Early in the morning.


                      More seriously -he really has to go doesn't he? Maybe it will wake him up.

                      Paula
                      He is total garbage! Quick! Hide him on my trailer (Petstorejunkie).

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Next time he gets loaded, then the barn owner or anyone close should call the police, tell them the license number and where he's driving from and the direction he turned. Stopping someone from drinking isn't going to happen, but allowing someone to endanger everyone on the roads is morally unacceptible. And who is furnishing the beer? If it's not the drinker furnishing his own then someone could be liable for that too. If this man is driving after drinking then the police need to be called, before some carload of little kids dies. And the BO needs to grow a pair, and get rid of him as soon as possible or they'll be sued to when he drives off their property and hurts or kills someone.
                        You can't fix stupid-Ron White

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Kick him out, Kick him out, Wayyyyyyyyyy out! Seriously though, document his behavior on video. BO can then go to him, ask him to leave in 24-48 hours, have witnesses. Make sure he is supervised at all times while gathering his belongings. Deal with the fall out, if any, later.
                          When people show you who they truly are, believe them. Maya Angelou

                          Comment

                          • Original Poster

                            #14
                            I just wanted to thank everyone for the replies. . .and apologize to those of you who will spend the rest of the day with that jig stuck in yer noggin.
                            Please copy and paste this to your signature if you know someone, or have been affected by someone who needs a smack upside the head. Lets raise awareness.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Mad Mare View Post
                              Great. Now I have the song stuck in my head:

                              What do you do with a drunken boarder?
                              What do you do with a drunken boarder?
                              What do you do with a drunken board?
                              Early in the morning. . .

                              Put him in a boat with the cap'n's daughter. . .

                              Sorry, OP, not helpful at all, but you even mentioned "sailor" in your post

                              Eileen
                              Thanks heaps, i was only having ONE line running through my head.......not sure how the day is gonna go with a whole verse....


                              OP, everything should be done on paper to make sure the owner has a hard copy record if things get nasty.
                              Founder of the Dyslexic Clique. Dyslexics of the world - UNTIE!!

                              Member: Incredible Invisbles

                              Comment


                              • #16
                                How about new barn rules: No drinking on property. Shouldn't be a problem for other boarders since they aren't hanging out any more. Can state reason
                                upcoming childrens' camps or new insurance rules. Maybe that will get him to move on his own, after he leaves, rule goes bye-bye.

                                Comment


                                • #17
                                  Originally posted by Mad Mare View Post
                                  Great. Now I have the song stuck in my head:

                                  What do you do with a drunken boarder?
                                  What do you do with a drunken boarder?
                                  What do you do with a drunken board?
                                  Early in the morning. . .

                                  Put him in a boat with the cap'n's daughter. . .

                                  Sorry, OP, not helpful at all, but you even mentioned "sailor" in your post

                                  Eileen

                                  ROTFLOL!!!!!! Me toooo! And I figured that I'd be the only one thinking of that song!! (My dad's VERY fond of WWII-era music.)

                                  ...Put 'em in the scrupper with the stove-pipe on him (translation: pour warm water over him),
                                  Put 'em in the scrupper with the stove-pipe on him,
                                  Put 'em in the scrupper with the stove-pipe on him,
                                  Er-LIE in the mor-NING.

                                  Shave his belly with a rusty razor,
                                  Shave his belly with a rusty razor,
                                  Shave his belly with a rusty razor,
                                  Er-LIE in the mor-NING.

                                  Yep, gonna be hard to get rid of that ear-worm.
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                                  • #18
                                    Originally posted by c'est moi View Post
                                    Weigh heigh and up she rises
                                    Weigh heigh and up she rises
                                    Weigh heigh and up she rises
                                    Early in the morning
                                    Put 'em in the sloppy-wet arena and make 'em drink it
                                    put 'em in the sloppy-wet arena and make 'em drink it
                                    put 'em in the sloppy-wet arena and make 'em drink it
                                    ear-ly in the mor-ning

                                    Weigh-heigh up she rises
                                    Weigh-heigh up she rises
                                    weigh-heigh up she rises
                                    ear-ly in the mor-ning
                                    Last edited by skippy60; May. 5, 2012, 01:54 PM. Reason: horse-ified

                                    Comment


                                    • #19
                                      If it were funny/ridiculous behavior my answer would be:
                                      Get it on video and put it on youtube
                                      get it on video and put it on youtube
                                      get it on video and put it on youtube
                                      for every one to laugh at.

                                      BUT, since it's truly problematic, I can share what I did when I had to evict my boarder.

                                      Phone call, and email saying basically that I was terminating our contract and they had 30days to find other arrangements for their horses.

                                      If that had not been enough, she would have received a certified letter with return receipt.
                                      Owned by a Paint/TB and an OTTB.
                                      RIP Scoutin' For Trouble ~ 2011 at 10
                                      RIP Tasha's Last Tango ~ 2010 at ~23
                                      RIP In Sha' Allah ~ 2009 too young at 5

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                                      • #20
                                        Why can't the BO just ban alchohol on barn property? Evict him if he violates the ban.

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