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Help me not be *that* seller

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  • Help me not be *that* seller

    *Note for mods--this is for a FTGH horse so please don't think this is advertising. If I need to make any tweaks to keep things kosher, I'll be glad to*

    Many of you may have read the Riley thread that started about 16 months ago. For a mare that I'll probably never ride, certainly never compete, she has wormed her way into my heart in a really special way. She had her foal and we're weaning this week, so it's time to start looking for a kiddo for Riley. Intellectually, I *know* this is the right thing, but even attempting to type this post has me in tears. She's such a sweet, nearly perfect mare and she's going to be incredibly special for the right kid/family---yes, I know that every seller says that but in my 20+ years around horses, she's just an angel with a fluffy mane.

    So as I write her "ad," how do I convey to the potential new owners that I want to make sure she goes to a fabulous home, but yet, I don't want to be one of those people that makes new owners jump through 27 hoops before transferring ownership. This mare came from a hellish situation and is now healthy, happy, fat, and occasionally sassy. Is it helicopter-ish to ask for trainer or vet references? To ask about experience with greenies and what her boarding situation will be like? And how do I ask for a first right of refusal? I know that not every new owner will actually follow through, but it seems right.

    For the record, I would absolutely consider a long-term lease (or short-term for that matter), but would my approach be any different?
    Flip a coin. It's not what side lands that matters, but what side you were hoping for when the coin was still in the air.

    You call it boxed wine. I call it carboardeaux.

  • #2
    Is permanent loan an option?

    Where the horse is (basically) theirs, but if there was ever any issue or they couldn't keep her you could whisk her away.

    They pay all fees, etc.

    (I would still do a reference check and maybe a property check, though. if there's a family who really wants her they'd jump through hoops of fire to get her, right?)

    Some more info:
    http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question...1093409AAHfJbj
    Proud member of the COTH Junior (and Junior-at-Heart!) clique!

    Comment

    • Original Poster

      #3
      A permanent loan (or a free lease) is ABSOLUTELY an option. Heck, in some ways I'd *MUCH* prefer that. Then if I ever do decide to spawn, I'd still have my hands on a fabulous pony for said offspring. Is it sad that I've gone 30+ years and NEVER wanted kids until this pony entered my life and I've thought several times that I should consider popping out a kiddo for the pony? Isn't that backwards?
      Flip a coin. It's not what side lands that matters, but what side you were hoping for when the coin was still in the air.

      You call it boxed wine. I call it carboardeaux.

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by jen-s View Post
        A permanent loan (or a free lease) is ABSOLUTELY an option. Heck, in some ways I'd *MUCH* prefer that. Then if I ever do decide to spawn, I'd still have my hands on a fabulous pony for said offspring. Is it sad that I've gone 30+ years and NEVER wanted kids until this pony entered my life and I've thought several times that I should consider popping out a kiddo for the pony? Isn't that backwards?
        That is sooo not the worst reason I've heard of to have a kid.. (is that sad?)
        "Sadly, some people's greatest skill, is being an idiot". (facebook profile pic I saw).

        Comment

        • Original Poster

          #5
          Originally posted by smokygirl View Post
          That is sooo not the worst reason I've heard of to have a kid.. (is that sad?)
          Yes it is sad and unfortunately, I know exactly what you mean.
          Flip a coin. It's not what side lands that matters, but what side you were hoping for when the coin was still in the air.

          You call it boxed wine. I call it carboardeaux.

          Comment


          • #6
            Full grown adults can certainly drive a pony to cart. What is the reason you can't keep her and do something else besides ride?

            If you are going to lease, I would find a barn that's within driving distance and go visit, often. Otherwise, sell her on and hope for the best. Certainly you can check references. Another option is to donate her to a REPUTABLE rescue, which will keep tabs and make sure she's ok.

            I don't think a pony is a good reason to have a kid, sorry ... check out all the threads from people who are desparate for their kid(s) to ride, and they have no interest.

            Comment

            • Original Poster

              #7
              Originally posted by Kwill View Post
              Full grown adults can certainly drive a pony to cart. What is the reason you can't keep her and do something else besides ride?

              If you are going to lease, I would find a barn that's within driving distance and go visit, often. Otherwise, sell her on and hope for the best. Certainly you can check references. Another option is to donate her to a REPUTABLE rescue, which will keep tabs and make sure she's ok.

              I don't think a pony is a good reason to have a kid, sorry ... check out all the threads from people who are desparate for their kid(s) to ride, and they have no interest.
              I'm so sorry. My lame attempt at humor must have fallen flat. I'm VERY single and I solemly swear on the pony herself that I'm not really planning to spawn in order to have a reason to keep Riley. Really. I work in pediatrics, so believe me that anytime I start to think "well, maybe" that thought gets nipped in the bud right quick.

              As far as why I can't keep her, well I could. I can certainly pay her bills and continue to love her every day. But, she's a sweet girl and would be an adorable gaming or pony club pony for someone. At this point, I don't have much interest in driving and I've got enough on my plate bringing along my gelding and hopefully getting him show ready sometime before the next decade. Since she is youngish (~6) and healthy, it's entirely appropriate that she go find a kiddo and learn a "career."
              Flip a coin. It's not what side lands that matters, but what side you were hoping for when the coin was still in the air.

              You call it boxed wine. I call it carboardeaux.

              Comment


              • #8
                I know what you are going through

                We have given away my daughters last horse, 15 years old and a super animal. I had lots of offers to buy him, but have given him to an old foxhunter and his wife to use as a trail horse and third field mount. They have their own place and have made provisions in their will for the animals to be cared for. This horse is show quality with lots of miles left, but he will be happy as a clam with light work. Money couldn't make up for a guilty conscience if I had not made sure he has a permanent home. I hope you are able to work out a solution to put your mind at ease.

                Comment


                • #9
                  I have no problem with people selling a horse wanting to check out my farm, contact my vet, farrier, etc.
                  But, I understand the emotional attachment as well as the scum out there who say one thing and do another.

                  I do believe it is our responsibility to do due diligence, unless of course you don't care or are just in the biz to buy and sell, and no emotional involvement.
                  save lives...spay/neuter/geld

                  Comment

                  • Original Poster

                    #10
                    Thanks y'all.

                    I don't need to know every detail of her potential new home, but I'm glad to know that it isn't unreasonable to ask some questions.

                    As I phrase the ad, I think I'll also specifically state that either experience with green horses or regular work with a trainer is preferred. While she's a good girl, I worry about the whole green+green=black & blue.

                    Any suggestions for where to market her? I prefer not to use Craigslist. Thought I'd put her here (in the giveaways) and we have a Triangle-Area Equestrians group on FB. Any other recommendations?
                    Flip a coin. It's not what side lands that matters, but what side you were hoping for when the coin was still in the air.

                    You call it boxed wine. I call it carboardeaux.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Hmmm. Have you considered contacting your local youth organizations (Pony Club/FFA/Girl Scouts, etc). There may be someone out there who would love to free-lease a good pony, but not have to worry about what to do when DS decides he prefers mopeds...or DD outgrows her .. or the grandkids moved out of state.. etc)..



                      FWIW.. Worst reason I ever heard to have a kid..

                      "The clothing is so cute.. it's like a live accessory" .
                      "Sadly, some people's greatest skill, is being an idiot". (facebook profile pic I saw).

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Definitely contact your local pony club and possibly your local hunt, these are good networks through which to advertise a "pony for loan." I think there is much more interest in leases/loans for kids because with kids you KNOW they are going to outgrow the pony.

                        It definitely is not unreasonable to have a conversation about the person's plans to care for the horse and if a lease to have a contract specifying a few things that are important to you. For a lease, trainer and vet references are fine to ask for.

                        Just be calm, straightforward and reasonable about what you want. "Pony must have regular vet and farrier care" is reasonable. "Pony must have six supplements fed daily" is not. "I want to come visit once in a while" is fine, "I want to visit daily/weekly" is too much.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Put the word out through horse people you trust whose standards are the same as (or higher than) yours for finding Riley a home. Sometimes word-of-mouth is really the best way to find the right home for that special horse.

                          And good luck ... I remember her story (you're not far from me) and hope she finds her person!
                          Full-time bargain hunter.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            First, like other posters, I don't think conducting due diligence is at all hoverish. I even visited The Little Mare's potential home and met all the family members and talked briefly to the family's vet.

                            To "advertise," in addition to pony club, 4-H and hunt clubs, I'd contact trainers/instructors that I like and let them know about the wonderful free lease opportunity.

                            Additionally, if she's going to be competing (especially jumping), I'd ask the family to insure her with medical/surgical coverage. But that's just me.

                            And by FAR not the worst reason I've heard for having a child. Those who say it is have been very fortunate in their limited dealings with pathetic parenting.
                            *=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              I think in the situation you describe, I would try to network with people you trust/respect rather than just write an ad to place her.

                              Is there a local trainer you like who might know of a kid who'd be a good fit? Vets and farriers also tend to know what is going on in local barns too, and can offer recommendations.

                              I hate to say it, but I personally do find ads that are written with lots of requirements for references, spot checks etc to be really off putting. I know it's not PC to say so, but it makes me worry that the seller is going to be a PITA to deal with, and I'd skip right over a situation like that... even though I have nothing to hide and give my horses great care. (Sorry.)

                              Of course, it's your horse and you can put whatever requirements on a buyer that you want to, but my advice is to consider having those conversations in person rather than as conditions in an ad, if you are going to go that route in a sales situation. (FYI "I'm willing to take her back if things don't work out/circumstances change/etc" is an offer, not a condition...)

                              Does sound like a long term free lease/loan might be a better option for you, though. Good luck either way!
                              **********
                              We move pretty fast for some rabid garden snails.
                              -PaulaEdwina

                              Comment


                              • #16
                                No, the worst reason to have a kid is "to keep your boyfriend from leaving you." Or, the related, to get child support to spend on yourself.

                                For a pony isn't even close.

                                I like the free lease idea. Then if it is going well you can sell (i.e. give) to them.
                                DIY Journey of Remodeling the Farmette: http://weownblackacre.blogspot.com/

                                Comment

                                • Original Poster

                                  #17
                                  This is what I have. It seems MUCH longer than it should be. Thoughts? Recommendations for editing are greatly appreciated.

                                  "Riley" was purchased in April 2010 with a body condition of about 1.5. Age is slightly uncertain, but both vet and equine dentist aged her at ~6 years (as of this fall). Riley was found to be in foal upon examination by local vet and healthy foal was born in late Feb 2011. Foal is now weaned and mare has been started under saddle. She lunges quietly with tack--no problems with saddling, we are still convincing her that bits aren't supposed to be chewed upon endlessly. She has outstanding ground manners, bathes, ties, adores grooming, having her mane pulled, and is easy to blanket and deworm. She is new to clipping and will require a bit of patience but is sensible and safe. Riley's only "ponyish" vice is occasionally being reluctant to be caught which is easily gotten around by the mere sighting of a cookie or 10 seconds of patient standing until she approaches. Because she was rounded up on the range and probably lassoed, she can be a little leery of ropes, but a quiet "whoa" or cookie would convince her to tolerate most anything.

                                  Riley is healthy, sound, and would most likely excel as a gaming, pony club, or trail pony. She has a lateral walk and a fair bit of knee action which will prevent her from great success in the hunter ring. She is careful, smart, alert, and attentive to her humans which seems like a fairly perfect combination for a child's pony. She has not been backed although both myself and my barn owner have leaned our weight across her multiple times. She was thoroughly unimpressed, but quite tolerant. (Please note, she is not a "finished" pony and will not be sent to a home that either does not have experience with green horses or does not have an experienced trainer or adviser available.) I have "borrowed" the children of coworkers and friends for pony time and she is not only tolerant of green human foibles, but seems to quite adore the little (and not so little!) tykes. She carefully takes treats and remains very conscientious with her body to not bump into children, even those that roll balls under her belly, whack her accidentally with their arms, or make loud noises or quick gestures. She has also been around a child who walks with the assistance of a walker and her mindful affection for that little girl was heartwarming.

                                  As you can probably tell, I feel not only somewhat emotionally attached, but also a strong affection for this mare and want to ensure that she goes to a home where she will be loved and treasured. I never expected to recoup my expenses for purchase, rehab, and general care and am not asking a traditional selling price or rehoming fee. She is free to exceptional home or can be available for free lease on a short- or long-term basis. I hope that her new family will keep me updated periodically with pictures or videos and when your children outgrow her, I would like the opportunity to have first right of refusal and am willing and prepared to take her back at any point if your circumstances change or the match isn't successful. I would also like to speak with your vet and trainer prior to any final decisions.

                                  Pictures and video are available to interested adults.
                                  Flip a coin. It's not what side lands that matters, but what side you were hoping for when the coin was still in the air.

                                  You call it boxed wine. I call it carboardeaux.

                                  Comment


                                  • #18
                                    Originally posted by jen-s View Post
                                    Thanks y'all.
                                    Any suggestions for where to market her? I prefer not to use Craigslist. Thought I'd put her here (in the giveaways) and we have a Triangle-Area Equestrians group on FB. Any other recommendations?
                                    Ask your vet and farrier if they know of any clients looking for something like her ( to buy, lease etc) . Local horse 4-H and pony clubs ( if you have them). It would also help in the references dept if vet and farrier have seen their other horses.

                                    Comment

                                    • Original Poster

                                      #19
                                      I forgot to add the subject line "~14h 6yo BLM-branded Mustang mare"
                                      Flip a coin. It's not what side lands that matters, but what side you were hoping for when the coin was still in the air.

                                      You call it boxed wine. I call it carboardeaux.

                                      Comment


                                      • #20
                                        Stepping outside the box. Approach some local trainers
                                        that have lesson barns of kids -- 4h or show. Free lease her to the trainer until you find the right kid match, then lease to the kid with an eventual purchase in mind.

                                        That would be an ideal win-win for everyone.

                                        Or.....

                                        Again, stepping outside the box. Think of wording an ad stating the owner you are looking for. IE; Wanted, kid owner for a sweet pony mare, must be an active rider looking for fun on trails and showing.....etc... you'll find the words. That might help define the buyers responding a lot better.
                                        IN GOD WE TRUST
                                        OTTB's ready to show/event/jumpers. Track ponies for perfect trail partners.
                                        http://www.horseville.com/php/search...=1&ssid=057680

                                        Comment

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