• Welcome to the Chronicle Forums.
    Please complete your profile. The forums and the rest of www.chronofhorse.com has single sign-in, so your log in information for one will automatically work for the other. Disclaimer: The opinions expressed here are the views of the individual and do not necessarily reflect the views and opinions of The Chronicle of the Horse.

Announcement

Collapse

Forum rules and no-advertising policy

As a participant on this forum, it is your responsibility to know and follow our rules. Please read this message in its entirety.

Board Rules

1. You’re responsible for what you say.
As outlined in Section 230 of the Communications Decency Act, The Chronicle of the Horse and its affiliates, as well Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd., the developers of vBulletin, are not legally responsible for statements made in the forums.

This is a public forum viewed by a wide spectrum of people, so please be mindful of what you say and who might be reading it—details of personal disputes are likely better handled privately. While posters are legally responsible for their statements, the moderators may in their discretion remove or edit posts that violate these rules. Users have the ability to modify or delete their own messages after posting, but administrators generally will not delete posts, threads or accounts upon request.

Outright inflammatory, vulgar, harassing, malicious or otherwise inappropriate statements and criminal charges unsubstantiated by a reputable news source or legal documentation will not be tolerated and will be dealt with at the discretion of the moderators.

Credible threats of suicide will be reported to the police along with identifying user information at our disposal, in addition to referring the user to suicide helpline resources such as 1-800-SUICIDE or 1-800-273-TALK.

2. Conversations in horse-related forums should be horse-related.
The forums are a wonderful source of information and support for members of the horse community. While it’s understandably tempting to share information or search for input on other topics upon which members might have a similar level of knowledge, members must maintain the focus on horses.

3. Keep conversations productive, on topic and civil.
Discussion and disagreement are inevitable and encouraged; personal insults, diatribes and sniping comments are unproductive and unacceptable. Whether a subject is light-hearted or serious, keep posts focused on the current topic and of general interest to other participants of that thread. Utilize the private message feature or personal email where appropriate to address side topics or personal issues not related to the topic at large.

4. No advertising in the discussion forums.
Posts in the discussion forums directly or indirectly advertising horses, jobs, items or services for sale or wanted will be removed at the discretion of the moderators. Use of the private messaging feature or email addresses obtained through users’ profiles for unsolicited advertising is not permitted.

Company representatives may participate in discussions and answer questions about their products or services, or suggest their products on recent threads if they fulfill the criteria of a query. False "testimonials" provided by company affiliates posing as general consumers are not appropriate, and self-promotion of sales, ad campaigns, etc. through the discussion forums is not allowed.

Paid advertising is available on our classifieds site and through the purchase of banner ads. The tightly monitored Giveaways forum permits free listings of genuinely free horses and items available or wanted (on a limited basis). Items offered for trade are not allowed.

Advertising Policy Specifics
When in doubt of whether something you want to post constitutes advertising, please contact a moderator privately in advance for further clarification. Refer to the following points for general guidelines:

Horses – Only general discussion about the buying, leasing, selling and pricing of horses is permitted. If the post contains, or links to, the type of specific information typically found in a sales or wanted ad, and it’s related to a horse for sale, regardless of who’s selling it, it doesn’t belong in the discussion forums.

Stallions – Board members may ask for suggestions on breeding stallion recommendations. Stallion owners may reply to such queries by suggesting their own stallions, only if their horse fits the specific criteria of the original poster. Excessive promotion of a stallion by its owner or related parties is not permitted and will be addressed at the discretion of the moderators.

Services – Members may use the forums to ask for general recommendations of trainers, barns, shippers, farriers, etc., and other members may answer those requests by suggesting themselves or their company, if their services fulfill the specific criteria of the original post. Members may not solicit other members for business if it is not in response to a direct, genuine query.

Products – While members may ask for general opinions and suggestions on equipment, trailers, trucks, etc., they may not list the specific attributes for which they are in the market, as such posts serve as wanted ads.

Event Announcements – Members may post one notification of an upcoming event that may be of interest to fellow members, if the original poster does not benefit financially from the event. Such threads may not be “bumped” excessively. Premium members may post their own notices in the Event Announcements forum.

Charities/Rescues – Announcements for charitable or fundraising events can only be made for 501(c)(3) tax-exempt organizations. Special exceptions may be made, at the moderators’ discretion and direction, for board-related events or fundraising activities in extraordinary circumstances.

Occasional posts regarding horses available for adoption through IRS-registered horse rescue or placement programs are permitted in the appropriate forums, but these threads may be limited at the discretion of the moderators. Individuals may not advertise or make announcements for horses in need of rescue, placement or adoption unless the horse is available through a recognized rescue or placement agency or government-run entity or the thread fits the criteria for and is located in the Giveaways forum.

5. Do not post copyrighted photographs unless you have purchased that photo and have permission to do so.

6. Respect other members.
As members are often passionate about their beliefs and intentions can easily be misinterpreted in this type of environment, try to explore or resolve the inevitable disagreements that arise in the course of threads calmly and rationally.

If you see a post that you feel violates the rules of the board, please click the “alert” button (exclamation point inside of a triangle) in the bottom left corner of the post, which will alert ONLY the moderators to the post in question. They will then take whatever action, or no action, as deemed appropriate for the situation at their discretion. Do not air grievances regarding other posters or the moderators in the discussion forums.

Please be advised that adding another user to your “Ignore” list via your User Control Panel can be a useful tactic, which blocks posts and private messages by members whose commentary you’d rather avoid reading.

7. We have the right to reproduce statements made in the forums.
The Chronicle of the Horse may copy, quote, link to or otherwise reproduce posts, or portions of posts, in print or online for advertising or editorial purposes, if attributed to their original authors, and by posting in this forum, you hereby grant to The Chronicle of the Horse a perpetual, non-exclusive license under copyright and other rights, to do so.

8. We reserve the right to enforce and amend the rules.
The moderators may delete, edit, move or close any post or thread at any time, or refrain from doing any of the foregoing, in their discretion, and may suspend or revoke a user’s membership privileges at any time to maintain adherence to the rules and the general spirit of the forum. These rules may be amended at any time to address the current needs of the board.

Please see our full Terms of Service and Privacy Policy for more information.

Thanks for being a part of the COTH forums!

(Revised 2/8/18)
See more
See less

Horse criteria for choosing owner

Collapse
X
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Horse criteria for choosing owner

    Saw this on facebook this morning:

    You know how when horse shopping we have a mental list of what we want (color, height, temperament, trainability, experience, etc)... How about if the horse had its own criteria for its potential future owner like...

    No taller than 5’6, No heavier than 130, Must come with tack made within this century, have the Ability to feel my mouth and not put 50 pounds of pressure on it!! Moves with my stride and knows how to stay on the diagonal, and not bounce all over the place and hurt my back, Must understand how to give clear, consistent signals so I know WTF they want…and do they hit me when they give me the wrong cues? if so, thats a one way ticket to the dirt....

  • #2
    Prospective owner must know how to buy a carrot. Must not be afraid to take me out of the damned arena on a regular basis. Regular tack cleaners are a plus.
    I tolerate all kinds of animal idiosyncrasies.
    I've found that I don't tolerate people idiosyncrasies as well. - Casey09

    Comment


    • #3
      Horse seeks petite female for long walks on the lead rein in lush fields of clover....

      Comment


      • #4
        My Ideal Human

        Must be a foodie.
        Must demonstrate an ability to feed me food I like regularly, and be on time.
        Must have plenty of grass to eat.
        Must provide lots of Poland Springs water.
        Must have horses to play with.
        Must provide lots of turnout so I can play with above horses whenever I want.
        Must provide shelter if I want it.
        Must have warm, fluffy blankets if I want them.
        Must groom me daily.
        Must ask if she wishes to ride. And go easy on the circles. I reserve the right to decline.
        "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." Albert Einstein

        http://s1098.photobucket.com/albums/...2011%20Photos/

        Comment


        • #5
          Preference given to those fluid in horse speak and any that read minds.

          Comment


          • #6
            Must own soft goat hair brushes. No curry combs ever. (I'm a TB.)
            Don't wrassle with a hog. You just get dirty, and the hog likes it.

            Collecting Thoroughbreds - tales of a re-rider and some TBs

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by LauraKY View Post
              No taller than 5’6, No heavier than 130, Must come with tack made within this century, have the Ability to feel my mouth and not put 50 pounds of pressure on it!! Moves with my stride and knows how to stay on the diagonal, and not bounce all over the place and hurt my back, Must understand how to give clear, consistent signals so I know WTF they want…and do they hit me when they give me the wrong cues? if so, thats a one way ticket to the dirt....
              D'oh! I'm disqualified by line 2. But I have yet to find a horse that doesn't like my circa 1980 Macpherson (western) equitation saddle.

              My horse has a multi-page Union Contract that Management must sign. There's a lot of fine print, many sub- sub-sections in there and two appendices full of definitions.

              Every conceivable event (read: Affront By Management) is covered. Should we come to some combination of circumstances not expressly specified, this horse simply calls up his bevy of lawyers (kept on retainer) for help with interpretation.

              He's Dutch, even though he was bred here and by me. You'd think the fact that Management gave Labor life itself would matter. "Not so!" says he, an excellent student of Karl Marx. That Management bred Labor is all part of the grand plan of exploitation. "Duh," he says.

              These socialist European horses are well-organized and well-educated. Do ask to see the contract before you buy a Warmblood.
              The armchair saddler
              Politically Pro-Cat

              Comment


              • #8
                Must feed peeps and other treats. Must also scritch on demand.
                www.specialhorses.org
                a 501(c)3 organization helping 501(c)3 equine rescues

                Comment


                • #9
                  ATG's criteria would be..

                  Human must be perfectly willing to be licked at all times. (he likes to taste test)
                  Human must be happy to play tug of war with saddle pads, lead ropes and whatever else I can find.
                  Human's cat must not mind being picked up by her tail and used as a flag (yep this has happened)
                  Human must not mind replacing fence rails, water heaters, feed buckets and all the other stuff I am required to wreck every day.
                  Human must not hand over treats on demand. (he fails at this one a lot.)
                  Human is required to spray the hose up in the air, so I can run back and forth under it on a hot day.
                  Human must not check electric fence twice a day, because if there's a short I'm gonna find it!!!

                  What can I say he's special..... *sigh*
                  Originally posted by ExJumper
                  Sometimes I'm thrown off, sometimes I'm bucked off, sometimes I simply fall off, and sometimes I go down with the ship. All of these are valid ways to part company with your horse.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by LauraKY View Post
                    Must come with tack made within this century..
                    ya i'm out too MVP!!!

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Model mares would read:
                      #1. Must have many geldings on site for her to tempt (and then turn down)
                      #2. Must have chrio on call
                      #3. Must weigh less than #150
                      #4. Must have small child for her to dote on.
                      #5. Must be a competent rider for jumping or have access to someone who is. (This is my fail point)
                      #6. Must own camera to take pictures of her stunning self at all opportune times.
                      #7 Must be willing to rub down with a soft towel daily to keep coat perfectly shiny
                      #8. Must own more than one saddle pad and let her choose which one she wears that day. (I line them up on the fence and she grabs one as we're headed to the cross ties.)
                      #9. Must give high praise for everything she does right and not drama for the things she does wrong.
                      #10. Must be able to sit a spook that includes 6 ft straight up in the air and a 6ft jump to the side (the side jump is the challenge as it's not the same direction twice in a row.)

                      Pony: Call the union and they will tell you of my requirements. I reserve the right to change both my routine and my mind at any moment. I reserve the right to choose my rider for that day and that ride as not previously discussed with same child the day before.
                      Adoring fan of A Fine Romance
                      Originally Posted by alicen:
                      What serious breeder would think that a horse at that performance level is push button? Even so, that's still a lot of buttons to push.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Must have a credit card (adequate checking account OK), good farrier, excellent vet willing to make barn calls at all hours, sense of humor.....

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Must share any food item human eats, ANYthing!
                          Must have own bottle of gatorade at events...
                          Must have at least 2 sheepskin lined pads/covers...
                          Must have fleecey, cushy girth...
                          Must have at least one hack a week...

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Sam (17h+ WB):
                            -Must cease grumbling about having to change my water bucket daily.
                            I dunk, you deal.
                            -Must serve grain immediately after mixing and stop reprimanding me for pawing when you don't.
                            My stall, My Rules.

                            Kouma (Hackney Pony):
                            -Understand that I reserve the right to make faces & kick at Sam....but only when there is a stall wall between us.
                            I'm small, but not stupid.
                            -Reminder: Pony is a 4-letter word (thank you to COTHer who posted this sage advice) thus there is no need to add other 4-letter words when I do what I do best.
                            Not what you intended?
                            So sad.
                            *friend of bar.ka*RIP all my lovely boys, gone too soon:
                            Steppin' Out 1988-2004
                            Hey Vern! 1982-2009, Cash's Bay Threat 1994-2009
                            Sam(Jaybee Altair) 1994-2015

                            Comment

                            Working...
                            X