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"Two Round Pins": funny horse/barn ads

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    #41
    "Ferrier" isn't really wrong. It's actually historically correct.

    It's a bit like around here, to old farmers and horse breeders, all young horses are "colts," whether male or female. Not ignorance at all, just tradition.

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      #42
      Yep i've seen multiple ads in my life for "filly colts" or "philly colts" as it were.

      My voice to text is starting to learn "mare" finally. "Bridle" isn't coming along as quickly though.
      "I once heard a client ask our vet if a horse's brain was as small as everyone says they are. Without pause, the vet smiled and answered: 'Maybe, but have you seen their hearts?'" --Alice Peirce

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        #43
        Spelling aside, what is the propensity to show people standing on horses? Or climbing up to a standing position? Have horses become the newest step ladder replacement? I thought you bought horses to ride them.

        Saw a video today from an auction house. Someone jumped on bareback from some 50 yards away, halter and lead. Walked a figure 8. Halted. Climbed up to stand on horse's back. Plops back down. Video cuts out.

        Well THAT was helpful...

        Comment


          #44
          Originally posted by atr View Post
          "Ferrier" isn't really wrong. It's actually historically correct.

          It's a bit like around here, to old farmers and horse breeders, all young horses are "colts," whether male or female. Not ignorance at all, just tradition.
          Yeah no, no matter how true that is, that is not what the iPhone text editor had in mind.

          Good ole iPhone thinks I know all kinds of people with names that it helpfully suggests to me, substituting names for standard English syntax, even though I've never in my life known anyone with those names.

          Comment


            #45
            Originally posted by Bluey View Post

            Oh, a wonderful cross.

            I think that one is the winner.
            Oh, I bought a half-gelding once. $2,000 later and the vet going in up to his elbow and he was transformed into a purebred gelding.

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              #46
              Originally posted by outerbanks77 View Post

              Oh, I bought a half-gelding once. $2,000 later and the vet going in up to his elbow and he was transformed into a purebred gelding.
              Oh, I have known a few and every one was a nut case.

              Comment

                Original Poster

                #47
                Originally posted by Fin01 View Post
                Spelling aside, what is the propensity to show people standing on horses? Or climbing up to a standing position? Have horses become the newest step ladder replacement? I thought you bought horses to ride them.

                Saw a video today from an auction house. Someone jumped on bareback from some 50 yards away, halter and lead. Walked a figure 8. Halted. Climbed up to stand on horse's back. Plops back down. Video cuts out.

                Well THAT was helpful...
                These ads bother me so much and there are so many here in Texas. The worst ones are the big heavy Bubbas who stand on the bare horse back with cowboy boots. Yay for you! What the heck are you demonstrating?

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                  #48
                  Originally posted by thoroughbred21 View Post

                  These ads bother me so much and there are so many here in Texas. The worst ones are the big heavy Bubbas who stand on the bare horse back with cowboy boots. Yay for you! What the heck are you demonstrating?
                  Another lemming in boots?

                  For some idiotic reason, so many people have to prove that if Bubba can do it, they can, too. As fas as I can tell, that is the one and only reason.

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                    #49
                    I always make sure the horse I am looking at is "well bread". And of course a smooth gate is ideal. Pretty sure I would like a gilding also.

                    Comment


                      #50
                      I hate the ads with kids in dangerous situations, like congrats, horse is probably quiet/drugged/checked out enough not to have killed/maimed your child.... (or maybe it has and that's why it's for sale?)
                      If they're willing to risk kiddo's safety for a sale.... what other dodgy stuff is going on?

                      Side note on the standing on the back equals quiet thing. The most dangerous and neurotic horse I ever rode was a large STB gelding bought from the local sales. In the ring the guy selling him stood him in the middle, stood up on him and cracked not one, but two stock (bull) whips over his head. Horse did not blink. Horse however had nasty bolting problem, used to spook at his own shadows and would basically shut down randomly. It was like his circuits got fried and he'd either stand there shaking or bolt.

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                        #51
                        Originally posted by demidq View Post
                        Well we all know about the horses 'lounging' instead of lunging!
                        Oh yes. My horse lounges. If you try to longe
                        ​​​​​​her without enough conviction, she lies down and "smiles" at you.

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                          #52
                          Further to the kids ... the ads that prove the horse is great with children by showing their own elementary-age children climbing all over said horse, some kids wearing flip-flops and the others barefoot. Dressed like they are going to the beach. I guess the parents keep extra toes in the freezer in case they need them. Maybe even a whole foot.

                          Comment


                            #53
                            I have seen ads for places with a riding rink. I always wonder if that means I need to buy my horse ice skates.
                            Oh, well, clearly you're not thoroughly indoctrinated to COTH yet, because finger pointing and drawing conclusions are the cornerstones of this great online community. (Tidy Rabbit)

                            Comment


                              #54
                              We get a lot of ads around here stating a horse is "trail deluxe". Um, what is that, does it come with a side of fries? Wonder if I can find a jumper deluxe?

                              I also see a lot of quater horses.

                              My hopeful road to the 2021 RRP TB Makeover: https://paradoxfarm.blog/

                              Comment


                                #55
                                Not wording related but what’s making me crazier is the FB posts for tack/blankets for sale. 85% of the stuff posted is incredibly filthy or broken! Stuff that should go in the garbage not sell for 2$ plus shipping. Makes me nuts! Blankets that are encrusted with poop and giant rips 😳 I could go on and on.
                                Your village is calling. Apparently their idiot is missing!

                                Comment


                                  #56
                                  This thread reminded me of a horse seller who always says in her ads "Would suite a __ rider." I keep debating whether to tell her it's suit! SUIT!!
                                  That's fine, many of us have slid down this slippery slope and became very happy (and broke) doing it. We may not have a retirement, but we have memories ...

                                  Comment


                                    #57
                                    Originally posted by Bluey View Post

                                    "Red roans are always mares!"

                                    Someone told me that long ago, before there were many around.
                                    Was firmly believing it and surprise I didn't know that.

                                    Like calico cats, maybe?
                                    My chestnut Appy gelding with roaning, has on occasion been mistaken for a mare. I blame it in his Arab sire. Just too "pretty" I guess. That's him in my avatar.

                                    Comment


                                      #58
                                      Each line from a different ad, not so much as misspellings as funny writing:

                                      gelding more woe than go


                                      …he is a turd to my regular mount.

                                      ... he will pick a buddy and hoard them like the creature Golum from the Hobbit hoarded his ring. His BFF becomes "my precious".

                                      all black except for 4 white and an almost perfect diamond on his left side. and half of his butt hole is white.

                                      Fat as a 50 gallon drum, perfect size, hard to catch, mean to the goats & often double barrels

                                      So good lookin' even Ray Charles could see it!


                                      Spiritually attentive and sociable (no idea what this means)


                                      In memory of Apache, who loved to play. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MjZAqeg7HyE

                                      Comment


                                        #59
                                        Originally posted by Fin01 View Post
                                        Spelling aside, what is the propensity to show people standing on horses? Or climbing up to a standing position? Have horses become the newest step ladder replacement? I thought you bought horses to ride them.

                                        Saw a video today from an auction house. Someone jumped on bareback from some 50 yards away, halter and lead. Walked a figure 8. Halted. Climbed up to stand on horse's back. Plops back down. Video cuts out.

                                        Well THAT was helpful...
                                        They are always doing that. It is so stupid as it proves nothing. Most of the time those horses are so tired that they would let you do just about anything.
                                        The new thing is to grab their tail and be dragged behind the horse. I cringe every time I see that because it doesn’t take much to break a tailbone.

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