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Running out of options. Can't afford this anymore.

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  • Running out of options. Can't afford this anymore.

    Altered because I am a coward.

    Rant I guess...I am in a corner and can't see any way out. Everything seems to be happening at once and I am in a massive rut.

    First off I am losing my job at the end of next week. I have no other position lined up yet and am going to run through my money fast if I can't get anything this week.

    The field I am (barely) in has opportunities, but none in my area. I graduated last year and my plan was to do a care lease with my mare, then move to an area with open positions and hopefully get her back eventually. I have enough savings that I could likely support myself until I had a job, or even multiple jobs if necessary.

    At that point mare suffered a (relatively minor) soft tissue injury, and off went my hopes of finally moving out and making my own life. Now she is recovered, but not completely rehabbed. We just started canter work.

    On top of this we have to move out of the current boarding barn by mid-August, with nowhere to go. We have been at most of the less expensive places around and I can't afford the other barns or find anything else I can afford. Mare does live outside much better than stalled, but I can't find any other field board opportunities at decent places (where they actually feed and water the horses) either.

    I have no idea what to do. Quite honestly I just can't afford a horse -- or at least the full cost of a horse -- at this stage in my life. Everything I make is going towards her upkeep and care, and I don't know how I can get out from under this so that I can begin my own life/career. I feel idiotic trying to lease out a younger horse that still isn't completely back in shape, whether it's a full lease or part. Is that even done?
    And as much as it kills me to think about selling I know I couldn't anyway right now. I'm lost...
    Last edited by Carelessly hAltered; Jul. 27, 2019, 07:05 PM.

  • enterata
    replied
    All the advice given is excellent and positive. I don't think anyone mentioned that many universities that have equestrian teams are always asking for horses to be either donated or free leased. I am sure they would be willing to continue your mare's rehab in exchange. Best of luck to you. Please keep us posted. 💓

    Leave a comment:


  • J-Lu
    replied
    Originally posted by Carelessly hAltered View Post
    Thank you.

    I listed her for lease and have already had a good bit of interest. Will it amount to anything, probably not, but it's encouraging to me. At least it shows I probably can sell her for a low price if the interested parties back out.
    I never thought of calling barns around - it's tough because it's such a small world and I am terribly embarrassed about all this, but I've lined up some trainers that I don't believe are connected too well with those I don't want knowing.

    Still applying and had a phone interview at a company in NYC the other day. That gives me a bit of hope too.

    Thanks again for the encouragement and advice.
    You CANNOT be embarrassed by your situation, although I very much understand where you are coming from. Let that stress go, as hard as it will be. I guarantee the owners and trainers at local barns have also gone through crazy embarrassment whether you know about it or not. All horse professionals have-even the ones you don't want to know about this. Oh well. You move on. Like everyone else has had to do. You don't think about them, you think about you and this horse. Act in this horse's best interest and that is your legacy. You can always come back to training when you are more on your feet. MANY trainers have had to dip in and out of full-time training if they aren't financially supported by family or husbands. Pick yourself up and keep your eye on the ball. Lots of people are in your shoes.

    BTW, I know LOTS of people who network with each other/call around to barns and help each other out. In three states. It's not that uncommon.

    Leave a comment:


  • Backstage
    replied
    Originally posted by Carelessly hAltered View Post
    Thank you.

    I listed her for lease and have already had a good bit of interest. Will it amount to anything, probably not, but it's encouraging to me. At least it shows I probably can sell her for a low price if the interested parties back out.
    I never thought of calling barns around - it's tough because it's such a small world and I am terribly embarrassed about all this, but I've lined up some trainers that I don't believe are connected too well with those I don't want knowing.

    Still applying and had a phone interview at a company in NYC the other day. That gives me a bit of hope too.

    Thanks again for the encouragement and advice.
    Don’t be embarrassed. You don’t need to detail the nitty-gritty to everyone, or even anyone. You can focus on the future - you anticipate moving to pursue opportunities in your career, and need to find a new situation for your mare.

    I would concur with earlier advice to sell or give the mare away. It sounds like you may be awhile away from being settled enough to take the mare back. The last thing you want is to get a call that you need to pick her up/carry her costs on a moment’s notice. I would recommend trying to find a good match for her, and then focus on your next steps.

    Leave a comment:


  • rockymouse
    replied
    Also, put yourself together and March over to every local TV station and newspaper near you; Ask to talk to HR or the production team head for 5 minutes, hand over your resume w a big grin and say you would love to help them out on their production projects. It’s my experience in this field that the folks who show up to work on time and ready for the put in a productive day are thought of as geniuses. Go be a genius!

    Leave a comment:


  • clanter
    replied
    Originally posted by Carelessly hAltered View Post

    Still applying and had a phone interview at a company in NYC the other day. That gives me a bit of hope too.
    .
    Since you are looking at NYC I will PM you the contact info for my son's business... he is pretty open to help those who have genuine interest as it was by help of others that he has become successful, something he has not forgot

    Leave a comment:


  • Carelessly hAltered
    replied
    Thank you.

    I listed her for lease and have already had a good bit of interest. Will it amount to anything, probably not, but it's encouraging to me. At least it shows I probably can sell her for a low price if the interested parties back out.
    I never thought of calling barns around - it's tough because it's such a small world and I am terribly embarrassed about all this, but I've lined up some trainers that I don't believe are connected too well with those I don't want knowing.

    Still applying and had a phone interview at a company in NYC the other day. That gives me a bit of hope too.

    Thanks again for the encouragement and advice.

    Leave a comment:


  • J-Lu
    replied
    Dear OP,

    I'm so sorry you are going through this!

    I would first say that networking to find your horse a situation is key. My BO has recently found a "wanna-be trainer" (whom we know, works with the resident trainer) to ride her very green and spoiled nurse-mare foal horse. She has been looking for a rider for her green, spoiled, 6-year old "grade" horse and found one - a good one. No money is exchanged, the "wanna be" trainer wants a training opportunity between her retired horse and her yearling.

    Can you call around to reputable trainers and explain your situation? They might take on a "free lease" for lessons (some places don't want only "dead broke" horses). Or may have a client with an injured horse who wants something to ride in the mean time. This could give you time to get on your feet and have your horse ridden under the supervision of a trainer. Or, can you work off partial pasture board by doing weekend barn chores? My barn owners let occasional people work off board for doing some things they don't have time to do. I agree with the poster who said I wouldn't put my horse in a cheap pasture board situation. Most of those places don't look at or care for the horse.

    Like others have said, take a deep breath! And then envision the situations you WANT and work towards manifesting that. Do NOT be afraid to ask for help in your local community. I have been helped by people, and I'm happy to help people as well. I know you feel vulnerable and that's never a "fun" position to be in, but just embrace that and work to make things work for you and your horse. I had a horse in graduate school when I was dirt poor. I paid for things and worked things off. I got this horse as a trade for bringing other horses back from the track after lay-offs for a variety of reasons (people will do this!). As a post-doc, a very generous owner of a dressage facility allowed my to work some of my board off.

    You can manage this! For whatever is best for you and your horse. Pick your goal, find a way, make it happen! It may take a lot of elbow grease on your part but have confidence in the fact that you can make things happen. Maybe not the way you envision right now but who cares. Five years from now you can look back and have great stories to tell.
    Hang in there.



    Leave a comment:


  • jawa
    replied
    A friend's daughter is in video production. She started out part time with the State working on different projects they would put together to advertise or send out as informational. She has landed a full time job working for VDOT. She produces whatever video material they need. You may find that you can get experience in your field, though not in the exact area/discipline and still be in your current location. State benefits tend to be pretty good as well.

    Best wishes.

    Leave a comment:


  • clanter
    replied
    Originally posted by Carelessly hAltered View Post
    I am trying to get into video production, and unfortunately most of the positions are centered around LA, NY, and somewhat Atlanta. I went back to my college's career center and was told that in order to be considered for any of those positions I would need to already live there.
    those suggestions are pretty much correct, my son directs/produces advertising videos used in auto and but mostly fashion. It sure helps to be in either NYC or LA as much but not all of that work directed at the US market originates in those cities

    That industry really is based upon relationships, I have no idea as to what power your college's career center has but suspect very little other than providing an outline of what they think of the industry.... unless you attended a school known for its video work.

    A grassroots start would setting up a YouTube channel ...some of those have developed into interesting productions

    Leave a comment:


  • Janet
    replied
    Just as a data point- many years ago I "free leased" a 12 yo horse who was rehabbing from a suspensory injury, and was at the point were he needed a strict exercise regimen. I ended up leasing hm for about 5 years, and competed through Training Eventing with him. So there ARE people who will lease a horse in the middle of rehab.

    Leave a comment:


  • HungarianHippo
    replied
    CT has a very low unemployment rate-- like someone above mentioned, I am sure you'll find a LOT of retailers that are hiring. If you prefer regular office hours, try a temp agency. No, it's not your chosen career but it will pay at least some of your bills while you get back on your feet.

    I would sell the mare, or even consider giving her away to a trusted home, because this is not just a temporary, one or two month blip on the radar. For you to establish the career you want, you need to 1) save up a lot of $ and then 2) relocate (to places that have very high cost of living). So you're looking at probably 2-3 years before you are "settled" on a good path and advancing in your career. That's normal-- it's how you build a career. It doesn't just "happen" once your graduate.

    Most of us on COTH had to take a break from horse ownership in our college and early-career years. For people who aren't supported by parents or trustfunds, that period of life tends to be inherently unstable (not in a bad way, it's just a period of big changes) and cash-poor, two things that do not go well with horse ownership. It is also a period of tremendous fun, as you set out on your adult life, develop a career, and connect with other people who are going through that same exciting phase of life. So focus on building a financial base that lets you get out of your parents' home and go have that fun.

    Being this stressed out about finances takes a terrible toll on your body and mind. I'm so sorry you're going through this.

    Job search: the advice above about using a local address is good. Get a PO box to use as your return address. But, more importantly, use your NETWORK so that your resume is not the first thing the employer sees. Use your connections to make other connections. Request informational interviews with someone who works in the company or market segment you want to be in. An informational interview is not connected to any given open position-- you are just gathering information about the market, what is that particular company looking for, what are their strengths and challenges in the current market? Any trends you should be keeping an eye on for the next 5 years? What industry publications, industry committees, or conferences do they recommend? What tends to makes a candidate successful in that company, etc etc. You can do this!! Good luck!

    Leave a comment:


  • BellaLuna
    replied
    Originally posted by Sweetums Mom View Post
    In addition to all of the good advice and best wishes, please note that as a mother of adult children, if one of them had to come back to live with me for a while to get back on their feet, I would feel sad of their circumstance but secretly thrilled that they came back........or in your case, not left yet.
    I agree!
    I would also add that there is a huge difference between living with your parents and acting as a child (in no way implying that's what you are doing OP)- or living with your parents as an adult and taking on responsibilities in the day to day upkeep of a home/property. Mowing, cleaning, cooking, etc.Without being asked. Just something to keep in mind as you transition into your new chapter.

    I'm wishing you well as you sort all of this out.

    Leave a comment:


  • Denali6298
    replied
    OP I feel for you. I’m in a similar position. Not financially but I’m moving and I don’t think my horse will do well where I’m going at a price point that I can afford. I am going to advertise her as a green bean. Tough sell. Big hugs to you. CT is a hard place for affordable horse care.

    I also sent you a PM.
    Last edited by Denali6298; Jul. 29, 2019, 04:16 PM.

    Leave a comment:


  • Sweetums Mom
    replied
    In addition to all of the good advice and best wishes, please note that as a mother of adult children, if one of them had to come back to live with me for a while to get back on their feet, I would feel sad of their circumstance but secretly thrilled that they came back........or in your case, not left yet.

    Leave a comment:


  • BravAddict
    replied
    You can find field board in Vermont and upstate New York for $200/month. Good luck!

    Leave a comment:


  • L00kAtMeN0w
    replied
    Originally posted by Carelessly hAltered View Post
    I am trying to get into video production, and unfortunately most of the positions are centered around LA, NY, and somewhat Atlanta. I went back to my college's career center and was told that in order to be considered for any of those positions I would need to already live there. That might be doable, and it was my plan to move last summer (pre-injury) but not with a horse -- at least until I had a "real" job. Now I'm just trying to keep my head above the water.
    I ran into this a bit when I relocated from NJ to KY. My husband had a job lined up, but I didn't. So what did I do? I listed my address as Louisville, KY on my resume. if anyone asked (no one did), I would have told them that I was relocating there and hoping to line a job up before I moved. I don't see any reason why you couldn't do the same.

    Obviously, this means that the job would not come with any relocation benefits, but almost no entry level jobs do.

    Leave a comment:


  • colorfan
    replied
    If your mare is ready for light work maybe a traiiner/coach would be willing to take her. Your mare could be used lightly under supervision and in return get room and board.
    Think of seeking her a position in the same way you would seek your own position. Phone everyone you know and get at least one number from everyone you talk with.

    You are in a tough position for sure but this really is the time for tough planning and looking down the road. Some times hard choices are what opens up opportunities later!

    Let us know how you do!

    Leave a comment:


  • Ruth0552
    replied
    Sounds like horse is young? What was the injury? Might be more of a rehome/permanent free lease situation depending on the circumstances.

    Why is your current job ending? I assume you've looked into unemployment if you are being laid off? That could help tide you over and give you time to find a new real job.

    I suppose it depends on where in CT you live but there are BOATLOADS of people that commute to NYC from CT by car, train or boat. I think there are some areas that are not as expensive and still commutable to NYC, perhaps along the coast.

    Leave a comment:


  • furlong47
    replied
    You don't say where you are in CT or what exactly you're looking for, but there are loads of current job listings in the news departments of Hartford stations. Photographer, Producer, Writer, Editor, MMJs... no, it's not a production house but it can go on your resume and put money in the bank. I work in news and this is where TONS of people start for their first jobs out of college before moving on (and some of us stay).

    BTW, it's very common for people working in news to move around for jobs, so you could also try applying for those jobs first in the areas you're interested in to get a foot in the door. They won't be expecting you to have a local address when you apply as long as you are willing to move. The cities listed are all major markets which makes it harder, but in some cases you only need a few years experience.

    Leave a comment:

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