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soo..I think I just brought the demon to life

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  • soo..I think I just brought the demon to life

    Ok, so maybe that is a bit Extreme...but DH went riding with me for the first time in 3 years. I asked him to go since I've messed up my ankle, and he actually said yes this time.

    So I tack up the big gelding in western, and miss mare in jumping. Use the hackamore on the gelding and instruct DH to use the saddle horn if he feels unsteady. Gelding (17hh ottb angel) does a good job in schooling my husband...got him to loosen the reins, stop grabbing with his heels etc and taught him to steer...and yes, they looked drunk for awhile.. gelding was seeing how much he could get away with, but I yelled at the two of them and they fell into line.

    My frustration: won't grab mane or saddle horn, thus usuing horse's face to balance. we're doing a mock hunt, or that's what i call it..I'm going one direction out in the field, he takes off in another. I finally say "if you're going to hunt, you're going to have to learn how to follow the Field master's direction!)..so he started to follow. My sweet gelding was great and just fell into line and listened to me. DH now thinks he's the rider extroidonaire....ugh...

    so he does ask me what technical skills he needs to ride...um ALL OF THEM....oops , sorry....I said he could chase and maybe hill top, but he'd need to be stronger and not bang around on my horse so much. I have to admit, i hoped to really get the horses moving to scare him off a bit, but since I hurt my ankle, we could only do a couple short bursts. (we did do a "controlled" gallop, i got both horses moving up a hill pretty good, but yelled whoa to get DH's horse to stop at the top of the hill..horse did...

    I advised DH to go to our hunt master and take lessons with her. (she won't put up with his guff)....and he has to learn how to groom and tack the horse. He expects me to do it, but i got him working some. but still, i'm not having him hunt if he's not putting the work in.....

    I guess I need to find that Demon saddle eh?....
    I love my OTTB! I get my dressage test done faster!

  • #2
    Yipes, same here

    I feel your pain. . . I took Hubbyface to the barn yesterday, borrowed an Aussie stock saddle, and threw him up on Jellybean, who was suitably mellow from having hunted the day before. Hubbyface had a lovely time and wants to do this more now. Envisions someday hunting. Good thing/Bad thing. OMG.


    • #3
      Originally posted by bigbaytb View Post
      I guess I need to find that Demon saddle eh?....
      Can we arrange a bulk purchase?

      Mr. JSwan has decided that foxhunting looks like fun and he wants to try it.

      Of course I'm 100% supportive but I think I'm going to need a bigger flask to get through this....

      1) I will not teach him to ride.

      2) I will arrange proper instruction for him.

      3) I will attend said instruction if asked.

      4) I promise to STFU so as not to incur the wrath of the instructor (or MrJSwan)

      5) Not sure I can promise not to laugh at his first attempts to post the trot.
      Brothers and sisters, I bid you beware
      Of giving your heart to a dog to tear.
      -Rudyard Kipling


      • #4
        The other side

        You know folks, there is another side to the usual DH story! When my wonderful wife and I began dating 12 years ago, I had never been on a sport horse, she is 17 years younger than I am, and a lifelong eventer.

        I hung around the barn a little, my grandparents had been farmers, and watched her compete a few times. She didn't have to make too much of an effort to get me up on her saintly QH (16.2hh) that was then her current event ride. I loved that horse and my time out on the trails with DW.

        The next year the saintly QH needed some downtime due to an injury and he became mine as she found another horse. When Riley was healthy, I began to work with a professional.

        The first couple of trainers didn't warm to the prospect of working with an older adult (I was 50!) but did finally find a trainer who had the needed patience. She posed a question at the beginning of my first lesson: " What are your goals?" OMG I said, you mean that I have to have a goal?? After stammering a little about finding better balance, I blurted out that I would like to try fox hunting. This didn't faze her much, she was an upper level eventer, and had fox hunted around the country. "OK" she said, " I think we can make that happen". Now I had done it.

        Seven months of dressage later, my trainer took me on my first fox hunt with the Metamora Hunt. The bug bit deep. Riley and I were awarded our colors last season and of course fox hunting is the major passion in my equestrian life. I have evented a few times (at the most modest of levels!) over the past few years and won a ribbon or two at local dressage shows, but that just fills time when Riley and I are not hunting.

        I was able to convice my Dear Wife that she should try fox hunting a couple of years ago and she enjoyed some nice days out on Riley. This past spring she sold her current event horse and bought an ISH that had been hunting with Potomac Hunt. She has been out hunting more days this season than I have!!
        So, we are happily enjoying fox hunting together. It can happen.


        • #5
          I'm envious. I'd give anything for my DH to ride and hunt with me.


          • #6

            Yah, been there done that! Mine gave up when he realized he wasn't able to control everything....including the horse....and me!! Only took a few times out too for him to realize he just wasn't fit enough and hurt from soreness so much! Ya know...men hate pain!! And...what he was able to do was different from what he thought he was. That realization was tough. C'est la vie!
            Patience, patience, patience, sip of flask, patience, patience.
            Love dem Lemoncello's!!!


            • #7
              Originally posted by JSwan View Post
              3) I will attend said instruction if asked.

              4) I promise to STFU so as not to incur the wrath of the instructor (or MrJSwan)

              5) Not sure I can promise not to laugh at his first attempts to post the trot.
              speaking from the male persuasion: Don't attend ;-)


              • #8
                Hotspur, it's great to hear from the other side. I'm quite sure my husband will never decide to join me. First, he says he prefers his motorcycles, which do not have a mind of their own. Second, he's a really big guy, 6'6", and he doesn't think any horse should have to carry him around.

                I've tried to encourage my brother to come back to riding...he's quite athletic...and single...so I thought he could be quite popular in the horse world

                JSwan, your plan sounds great. If my hubby ever did decide to ride, I would insist on professional instruction!


                • #9
                  Go DH, Go!

                  I am happy that Hotspur and Mudroom joined in. I have a wonderful DH who wanted to learn to ride because when he was a small boy,his grandfather had put him up on a draft horse. He took lessons on his own before he met me. He WANTED to date me because of the horses. He courted on horseback and learned to hold hands and kiss on horseback. He loved cross country trail riding. I loved seeing his joy when he was galloping with me.

                  He took professional lessons for quite a while until he was working too hard and long. Then his hip and back started to go, and he was told not to ride. We both miss that time together. He has had back surgery and other repairs and announced that he wants to get back up again. He is fragile, but if the desire is really there, I'll find a way to make it happen. He would love hunting instead of car following and losing the hunt.
                  Intermediate Riding Skills


                  • Original Poster

                    hotsput..you're awesome

                    hotspur, I think if my hubby would take the path you did there would not be a problem. but, he thinks you just learn by going out to do it, not by taking lessons! that is my issue.

                    The next day after riding with my DH, I went on a trail ride with my trainer (we were both nursing injuries, so neither of us hunted that sunday)..

                    Can I tell you how pissed my gelding was at me? He immediately told me how much DH had been in his face and bouncing around on his back...Oreilly also told me that he was in control the entire time and took me a couple seconds to remind him that he does as i ask.

                    over all, DH isn't sympathetic towards the horse and does treat them like a sailboat and forgets they are flesh and bone. He gets annoyed that I let one of my friend's husband ride my horse, he's a novice rider, but is sympathetic to the horse and knows how to groom, tack and can tell if a horse is lame by the slighest tip.

                    But if DH does what Hotspur did, i'd be in heaven!
                    I love my OTTB! I get my dressage test done faster!


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by bigbaytb View Post
                      Ok, he has to learn how to groom and tack the horse. He expects me to do it, but i got him working some. but still, i'm not having him hunt if he's not putting the work in.....

                      I guess I need to find that Demon saddle eh?....
                      Ha ha! I'm doing the same. But with both the DH and the brother! I'm going to have to put shoes on my poor 18 year old broodmare who hasn't been ridden in about, mmm, 9 years!
                      At least I talked my brother out of trying to take my OTTB to try to play polo!


                      • #12
                        What gets me about non-riding husbands is that many attend every hunt and do all the grunt work. Seems like more fun to be one of the riders.

                        Anyway, I would love if my wife were into riding, but it's not gonna happen.
                        Yes, I know how to spell. I'm using freespeling!



                        • #13
                          thank god mine rode before i found him! now if only i could get him to go hunting, or eventing, or to a hunter pace..... but at least he can already groom, tack and ride, so i figure i'm halfway there!
                          Different Times Equestrian Ventures at Hidden Spring Ranch


                          • #14
                            DH has started taking lessons. I insisted he come with me and at least learn how to handle the horses for his own safety since DD started riding. He can now tack up and get to the arena on his own. He and my trainer get along famously and I just want him to be a competent rider. I am overly critical and my eye is horrid at judging proper riding as I woefully demonstrate each week in my own lessons. I take my lessons after he does and lately he's been grouped with another hubby whose daughter rides as well. I agree with the don't teach him yourself.
                            Adoring fan of A Fine Romance
                            Originally Posted by alicen:
                            What serious breeder would think that a horse at that performance level is push button? Even so, that's still a lot of buttons to push.


                            • #15
                              Speaking as a horse-crazy guy with a non-horsey wife (rare combo, I gather), I'd do backflips if Mrs. Leblanc were to catch the bug. Unfortunately, though she is actually a fearless rider and has clearly enjoyed it when I've had occasion to throw her on a horse (I think back to a time I got her to race me on a pair of criollos down in Mexico), she just hasn't been bitten by the bug. I sure would be pleased if someone could let me know where those bugs hatch, because it would streamline our lives an awful lot if she would get very badly infected. Then, we could just do the truly correct thing, and spend not merely a discrete, carefully allocated, monthly sum on the fix, but every last penny we earn!!! And move somewhere near a hunt, for that matter, so I wouldn't have to commute to Nevada a measly three times a year to do what it's all about. Mrs. Leblanc is a gorgeous woman, I should add. No one would look better in a nice little Patey hat, a little tweed . . . It breaks my heart, honestly. I'll probably be grateful to Mrs. Leblanc for ensuring that we have a shekel or two to retire on, but in the meantime, I would be tickled pink to be able to share my passion for riding with her. My hope is that baby #1, due to arrive in June, will mature into an avid equestrian him or herself and force the issue in my favor. If junior cries out to ride and daddy backs him or her up, surely mommy will have to acquiesce, right? Of course, junior could also turn out to be so expensive that the whole thing gets scuttled. We'll see. A fairly observant Catholic, I dedicate each Rosary to the hope that it will all work out, somehow, and see a meaningful coincidence in the presence of gals at my barn who muck stalls with babies in those papoose type things on their backs.


                              • #16
                                Wilfred, Bwaa-whaa-haa-haa!


                                I think you need to start your own thread for the luring of Mrs. Le Blanc into our fold of happy hunters...

                                I know we will be happy to help in this endevour, which will be great fun for us. I'm thinking something on the order of a grand hunt week, crafted around her favorite things about being with you and generous opportunities to have lots of positive aha! moments in the field with other former non-hunting spouses. You will soon be using lots of positive psychology with your new family addition. Your lovely DW will really appreciate the positive strokes after the little one's arrival.

                                Timing will be key, if you want her to share our sport. Right now, she has nesting on the brain. Not a propitious time to bring the subject up. You will need to think in terms of a year of planning in the strategy. Hopefully by next year, she will be thrilled to be out of the house and in need of the freedom of galloping in breath-takingly beautiful country with ecstatic adults.

                                Congratulations on appreciating how wonderful it is to be in love. She really needs to hear that frequently now, while she feels horrible. I look forward to getting to know you better. Please feel free to p.m. me. By the way, I am the mother of twin boys who are now 23 and hunting with me.
                                Intermediate Riding Skills


                                • Original Poster


                                  [QUOTE=wanabe;5201839]What gets me about non-riding husbands is that many attend every hunt and do all the grunt work.QUOTE]

                                  Huh? What, where are those DH's?...my DH has attended maybe 2 hunts....and one, where he was supposed to help me afterwards so I could attend the field-in, he was too busy fighing a war on who could finish the bourbon bottlefirst! (he won)

                                  If DH did any grunt work that involved horses or the hunt, I would be truly amazed....and that brings us back to my resistance on having him hunt my horses.....

                                  Wilfred: I was bitten with the horse bug from birth. I did not come from a horse friendly family thus had to wait til I was old enough to sign a release...so since wifey wasn't bitten early, maybe do as whicker says...we'll need to get her infected LOL!

                                  horsey and your catholic?..Damn..Why couldn't I find one of you out here in the sticks?....
                                  I love my OTTB! I get my dressage test done faster!


                                  • #18
                                    Originally posted by bigbaytb View Post
                                    horsey and your catholic?..Damn..Why couldn't I find one of you out here in the sticks?....
                                    I'm not nearly as exotic as I'm making myself out to be. I married a Catholic girl and converted. I was raised in the Episcopal Church.


                                    • Original Poster

                                      LOL...you converts always know more about the catholic religion than I do and I grew up catholic! LOL...
                                      I love my OTTB! I get my dressage test done faster!


                                      • #20
                                        Me too, me too. . .

                                        I too have shaken the hubby off the couch and now have to deal with him in the barn. . . adopted a sweet retired broodmare for him to bounce around on, a groovy leather-covered helmet for him, and he's getting his training wheels in place.

                                        Must find him other instruction, must not roll my eyes when it takes 10 minutes to put on a bridle, must not cringe at his good-hearted efforts to post while in a chair seat.

                                        On the good side, now I have someone to help shovel paddocks!