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Just Wow - Horse Show Moms

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  • Just Wow - Horse Show Moms

    Yesterday I took a few kids from the barn to a smaller show. Since it is the end of the year, everyone is out trying to pick up those last few points. One of my students put in a fabulous Eq trip (high 80's). Another kid who is leading our Zone with the USEF also had a really great trip. My kid ended up getting the blue; but it could have gone either way. The other kid was 4th or 5th, which I didn't agree with, but the judging was a "little off". The mother came up to me and said "my kid had a much better trip than yours and she should have won". My kid was riding two ponies (open card) and I don't think the woman saw her Eq trip because there is no way it was that cut and dry. Both kids were lovely OF and my kid put in a very strong flat phase.

    What do you say when someone is that rude? I pointed out my kid put in a fantastic trip and she must not have been watching or she would not have felt the way she did. I was honestly shocked the other kid didn't pin as well, but I was not surprised my kid won. Never in a million years would I have said something like that if the tables were turned.

    Moral of the story; money doesn't buy class.
    #JusticeForSunshine

  • #2
    Originally posted by LockeMeadows View Post
    What do you say when someone is that rude?

    "Well bless your heart."

    And that's all.
    Originally posted by barka.lounger
    u get big old crop and bust that nags ass the next time it even slow down.

    we see u in gp ring in no time.

    Comment


    • #3
      I just ignore them. They are everywhere. The only time I put them in their place is when they are my own customer. That I absolutely do not tolerate. Not within the barn or directed at other showers/parents. I've seen my share of local drama (a shocking amount of which comes from other local trainers.. to which I generally want to respond with a "get a life, man!") and its just not worth it to waste your breath. They will always "know better than you."
      Teneriffe Enterprises- NW Indiana
      www.saradanielhaynes.com

      Comment


      • #4
        "Well bless your heart."
        Yup.
        suze
        http://www.cafepress.com/horses_by_hawk

        Comment


        • #5
          I would have said, " Dully noted. Have a great day." and carried on. You are so right, money does not buy class.

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by LockeMeadows View Post
            Moral of the story; money doesn't buy class.
            What does money have to do with it? The mom sounds crazy, but how is her economic status relavent?

            Comment


            • #7
              "Bless your heart" or "I'm sorry that you feel that way."
              ---
              They're small hearts.

              Comment


              • #8
                There is one in every crowd. I have experienced the same type of nonsense in almost every activity/sport that my now adult children have done. Years ago, my daughter was returning back to riding after a serious car accident and a group of parents, riders and trainer were complaining loudly that she won( in a hunter class) because her equitation was sloppy. They were actually mocking the way she had to carry her head(due to her injury). What a lesson that trainer taught her riders that day!

                Comment


                • #9
                  I HAVE to ask this. Why is it you think the judging was "a little off" when it came to your kid that got 4th or 5th, but not for the 1st or 2nd place ribbons? Maybe the other mother saw something you didn't and thought the judging was "a little off" too?

                  Either way, the mother was a jerk for approaching you and saying something like that.

                  I just always notice when people think the judging isn't good only when it doesn't benefit them

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    My coach has a way of looking at you and saying "I beg your pardon?" when he hears something extraordinary...

                    I always wish I could remember to say that at times like you describe. I usually forget, and just answer the person...

                    But really the only reply that makes sense sometimes is to look at them like
                    Inner Bay Equestrian
                    Facebook
                    KERx

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by BelladonnaLily View Post
                      I HAVE to ask this. Why is it you think the judging was "a little off" when it came to your kid that got 4th or 5th, but not for the 1st or 2nd place ribbons? Maybe the other mother saw something you didn't and thought the judging was "a little off" too?

                      Either way, the mother was a jerk for approaching you and saying something like that.

                      I just always notice when people think the judging isn't good only when it doesn't benefit them
                      She never said that.

                      She said the judging was a "little off".
                      She felt between her kid and the other kid first could have gone to either.
                      Hers happened to be placed first. (This does not indicate to me that she was "fine with 1st and 2nd" since she seems to be indicating that 1st and 2nd was a toss up between those two and one of the two was first and the other placed too low.)
                      She would have placed the other kid higher than 4th or 5th.
                      HER kid won.
                      THE OTHER kid got 4th or 5th.

                      Just because you happen to win does not eliminate you from feeling the class could have been placed differently.

                      Meanwhile you are saying I just always notice when people think the judging isn't good only when it doesn't benefit them; and here is someone WHO WON saying/recognizing/admitting/whatever you want to call it, that they feel the judging was off.
                      The Noodlehttp://tiny.cc/NGKmT&http://tiny.cc/gioSA
                      Jinxyhttp://tiny.cc/PIC798&http://tiny.cc/jinx364
                      Boy Wonderhttp://tiny.cc/G9290
                      The Hana is nuts! NUTS!!http://tinyurl.com/SOCRAZY

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by BelladonnaLily View Post
                        I HAVE to ask this. Why is it you think the judging was "a little off" when it came to your kid that got 4th or 5th, but not for the 1st or 2nd place ribbons? Maybe the other mother saw something you didn't and thought the judging was "a little off" too?

                        Either way, the mother was a jerk for approaching you and saying something like that.

                        I just always notice when people think the judging isn't good only when it doesn't benefit them
                        I think the OP's kid placed 1st while the kid of the classless mom was 4th or 5th.

                        How about a kid approaching the judge during the middle of the show (followed by and encouraged by the mother) and whine to him, "why don't you like my horse, you're not placing us?" ?!!

                        Where's the trainer of this kid? If any of us, as parents, did something like that, my trainer would read us the riot act.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by LockeMeadows View Post
                          What do you say when someone is that rude?
                          My favorite is a look of surprise while asking "Oh my gosh, did you really mean to say that out loud?"
                          Auventera Two:Some women would eat their own offspring if they had some dipping sauce.
                          Serious Leigh: it sounds like her drama llama should be an old schoolmaster by now.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            LockeMeadows, if you are like me, I would have been tongue-tied due to disbelief that someone could be that assinine. However, a great answer to her would have been telling her to take it up with the judge and show management if she feels things were so out of whack. She wouldn't do it, but it would be a great comeback.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Just start picking your nose. They'll walk away.

                              Comment


                              • #16
                                Originally posted by RockinHorse View Post
                                My favorite is a look of surprise while asking "Oh my gosh, did you really mean to say that out loud?"
                                lol!

                                Comment


                                • #17
                                  rude rude rude.

                                  It brings to mind a story Jimmy Wofford told me at a clinic I was at. Of course I can't remember all the details. But basically he was sitting at a big time show with Bert de Nemethy. And a kid from Australia came up (who had horrid eq, but had just won or placed very well in show jumping) and said "well g'day Bert. Guess I showed you didn't I?" and Bert turned to him and said in a perfect Australian accent "G'day mate. Just imagine how great it is going to be when you finally learn how to ride!"

                                  I would never have the audacity to say that (nor am I recommending it) but apparently it really put the kid in his place!
                                  Words to live by:
                                  There's always another box on your test
                                  Over or through
                                  Throw your heart over the fence and go after it

                                  Comment


                                  • #18
                                    Well, if you can't say something nice, don't say it at all. That mother was out of place.

                                    Comment


                                    • #19
                                      Something very similar to this happened to me at an IHSA show... except it wasn't a mom who approached me, it was a coach, and it wasn't a student of mine who had won, it was me. Some people just have no manners.
                                      http://www.youtube.com/user/supershorty628
                                      Proudly blogging for The Chronicle of the Horse!

                                      Comment


                                      • #20
                                        Sigh. Its those parents that make me hate showing.

                                        I barely ever show both for money reasons, the fact that I am an adult (although, I don't look like it!) riding a large pony, and I only enjoy to show when I do it once in a blue moon.

                                        Last year I took my mare in the pony division at a fall fair. It was one of the only times the pony class was open to all ages and where the other divisions did not allow a pony in them. There was a judged warm-up and we trotted in, my mare saw the rides, and stopped dead. That round went terribly and so did the next round. However, for some reason, my last round went beautifully and to my surprise we ended up getting first, which was a first for me and my mare!

                                        While I am standing proud, with my friends/family taking pictures of me with my lovely ribbon, a father comes up to me, who is entirely oblivious, asking about her height. I figure he's a father who knows nothing and is admiring my horse, so I quickly say she's 14.2hh and go back to my pictures. He comes back many times, talking about how she looks too tall to be a pony and demands that she be measured to prove that she's actually a large pony and not a horse. Now, this is only a fall fair and I won only one class and didn't even place in a single other one, including all of the flat classes. I'm entirely speechless and rather emotional about him talking about me getting disqualified, so my friend gets tired of him harassing me about her height and goes on to tell of her being passported a large pony. He then wants to see her passport (cause you know... I bring it to all the fall fairs...).

                                        Nothing ever actually happened and he never went to complain, but its made me never want to go to that show again.

                                        I'm not sure what happened to being a good sport.

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