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Polite way to give notice

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  • Polite way to give notice

    Brief scenario:
    After 1 year at a farm, the "owner/BM" seems to have lost it. She is calling adult owners parents to complain about their adult (19) childs behavior, I have been caught in the middle of this and side with the 19 year old-BM has been being unreasonable about several issue. She asked the vet to call an owner of a horse that I am the legal Authorized Agent/trainer for, to discuss how bad this horses teeth were-I have had the horse in my care for 6 weeks. Vet seems to have been told a "story" about the horses past 18 months-and after I corrected his view, he seems very embarrased to have called. So happens that I was in said owners house when this call came in-therefore I was availableto talk to him. Mind you I talked to the BM last night about this horse. Horses owner is very upset that BM is consulting with EVERYONE about the condition of the horse. We know he is skinny, and as soon as we discovered his previous living situation, we got him out of it...

    The feeding is great, however we never seem to have time to ride as there is no barn schedule and we either have to water the indoor-as it is used for turnout with the doors open and wind drying it up. Or wait for the stalls to be cleaned (this is 7pm) prior to turn-in so we can ride in the pasture (No Outdoor at all)
    The only time anything extra, tack room swept, poop picked out of indoor/pastures is when I do it..and with kids AND a full time job, I have about 3 hours a day to play with my horses, and I have one in training that I am obligated to work with.
    Mind you we are not paying training center fees, but we are paying what is the geographic norm for an adequatly run boarding facility with "standard" amenities. I don't expect perfection for nothing, but it would be nice to know that my horse was turned out and his stall cleaned everyday if I am not there. It seems when I show up on days that she thinks that I am not going to be there-she is "just" starting to clean stalls...
    I always know that the horses are being fed so I have no concerns with that.

    My main concern is this, when we came in she got nervous that I was taking up so many stalls (5 of 8 available) because if I were to leave she would not have much income left.. I told her that I was likely to stay for a while, as long as it continued to work out. Well it's not working out, I don't want to give 30 days-because it seems as though she is getting cooky, and things have been SLIDING downhill for about 3 months and I worry what will be up in 30 days. I have been a BM and understand that she has ordered shavings/hay ect for the month...But given the outbursts ect lately I worry that the next 30 days is going to be miserable.

    Also, I am one of the 3 boarders that came in together that actually signed a contract..so the other two horses will be able to move this weekend, but contractually I must stay with my 3....

    How should I handle this?
    "The Friesian syndrome... a mix between Black Beauty disease and DQ Butterfly farting ailment." Alibi_18

  • #2
    You give notice, pay your 30 days and leave whenever you want. Heck, you can leave and then give notice. You just have to pay the 30 days.


    • #3
      Well, you could always pay her for the 30 days and then move the horses sooner. I understand if that is not feesable money wise though...Good luck- it is a sticky situation.
      Certified Spiritual Medium/ Animal Communicator


      • #4
        Are you near Lansing? LOL I can almost imagine *who* you're talking about.


        If you think she's getting kooky BUT the horses are getting cared for and are safe, then there's probably no reason to "rush" out of there. You can tolerate some discomfort--the horses should not.

        UNLESS there's an issue with safety, I'd give notice now for an Oct 1 leave date. (standard 30 days would be given on Sept 1, so give her a few extra weeks...)

        You're going to have to pay September regardless (if that's in your contract) so if you CAN live with the situation, do so and save your $$....else, be ready to pay double board and get 'em out of there.
        A good horseman doesn't have to tell anyone...the horse already knows.

        Might be a reason, never an excuse...


        • #5
          Originally posted by BuddyRoo View Post
          Are you near Lansing? LOL I can almost imagine *who* you're talking about.


          If you think she's getting kooky BUT the horses are getting cared for and are safe, then there's probably no reason to "rush" out of there. You can tolerate some discomfort--the horses should not.

          UNLESS there's an issue with safety, I'd give notice now for an Oct 1 leave date. (standard 30 days would be given on Sept 1, so give her a few extra weeks...)

          You're going to have to pay September regardless (if that's in your contract) so if you CAN live with the situation, do so and save your $$....else, be ready to pay double board and get 'em out of there.
          What Buddy Roos said except I'd wait till August 30 or 31st, as if she blows up, you might have to move sooner and pay board elsewhere.
          Remember, if she makes things dangerous, you can claim "constructive eviction" and move without paying for September. The safety of the horses is paramount, even if she is hostile to you when you do give written notice.

          I had to pay double board for Cloudy and Callie several times in order to make sure they were safe. I don't understand the hostility of when given notice, BOs getting mad that we boarders are "taking their money." It's our money and if we don't get the services, we should be able to move without hard feelings.

          Just make sure you have the "new" barn lined up and ready to receive the horses, AND make sure you aren't going to a worse situation. Good luck.


          • #6
            Having been a BM, then you should know you owe for the 30 days. It doesn't sound like your animals are in danger so if you can't afford to pay board twice for the same month, just wait it out.


            • #7
              I agree with the others. You need to give 30 days notice and pay for next month. That doesn't mean you have to wait until the 30 days are up to leave.

              I had a good barn owner gone bad situation once. I gave my 30 days, paid my next months board and got the heck out of dodge. It sucked having to pay double board that month, but I did what I felt was necessary at the time.


              • #8
                I am a barn owner and see it this way.

                You can leave when you want and prepare to pay for the upcoming month. Alternatively, I have offered people to pay my dry stall rate and leave. No hard feelings.

                This is never a comfortable situation. Do you think sitting with her could fix things?


                • Original Poster

                  We do have the new barn lined up, and originally I was preparing a post regarding known vs unknown as far as what sounded better-staying with the issues we had vs moving to a situation that is unknown.

                  However, while I was typing the post-I got the phone call from the vet..and that was kind of the straw that broke the camel's back.

                  Having had people leave (while I was at a show no less) with out 30 days-I know what a pain it is, however-I have always been of the opinion that if they don't like it..you are free to leave.

                  Regarding talking to her-has not helped so far.

                  Of course I am going to do the right thing and give 30 days...and have to stay because I cannot afford to pay board we are not using for 2 horses. If it gets dicy, I am sure I can figure something out.
                  "The Friesian syndrome... a mix between Black Beauty disease and DQ Butterfly farting ailment." Alibi_18


                  • #10
                    Ah, I see...well I thought you were maybe looking for a way to smoothe things over since she had expressed concern about having so many horses leave suddenly.

                    Flip side though...if you're going to be a nut, don't expect people to stick around. Seems like business plan fail to me.

                    I'd wait it out then...check your contract, see if it stipulates when you may give notice and then do it.

                    I'd probably not mention the "kooky" stuff or even the "talked to the vet you crazy woman" stuff....just that you found a facility that you just couldn't pass up.
                    A good horseman doesn't have to tell anyone...the horse already knows.

                    Might be a reason, never an excuse...


                    • #11
                      Oh I thought you were moving 5 horses?
                      With 2 it is not so bad.
                      Just say "thank you for taking care of my horses for the time we have been boarding here. However, I am going to move my horses on or before (date), so this will be your official notice of the termination of our boarding contract. This will give you time to advertise the availabilty of the stalls that I will vacating. I will pay my board for the month of September for my horses.
                      Thank you again for taking care of my horses and please see that they are cared for until I move them.
                      date and sign the letter.

                      don't go into specifics and don't write the letter when you are angry or drinking or both.


                      • Original Poster

                        Kinda of what I was thinking-

                        My husband is a known tightwad-so I was thinking of blaming it on him...
                        New barn giving multi horse discount?? I know it is a lie, but a believable one.

                        I know that the contract stipulates a 30 day-I wrote it....for some reason did'nt leave a good out. Liked her bunches in the beginning.

                        Seems I was the only one to sign it too...see what happens when you do the right thing and sign the contract? New barn actually does not have a 30 day clause...Hmm...talked to handful of boarders the other day-
                        They all seemed pretty happy.

                        So everyone is in agreement...be nice, tell her that I found someplace else...wait out the 30 days and scoot?

                        And if it hits the fan, sell myself for extra board money..got it.
                        "The Friesian syndrome... a mix between Black Beauty disease and DQ Butterfly farting ailment." Alibi_18


                        • #13
                          We just moved two horses the end of last month...didn't have a boarding contract so told barn owner on Friday that they were leaving on Sunday and paid for the two days of August that we were still there. In the past I have always had a boarding contract and have always abided by that contract when it came to what I was financially obligated for (30 days even if we moved the horse earlier) but in this situation there was no contract and it was really time to move pretty quickly.
                          I actually called and left a message on the phone that we would be leaving, and then we just did it.


                          • Original Poster

                            So a letter would be more non-confrontational? That is what I did when I left the last place, but I left there because it was way too far to drive and really liked it otherwise. Figured I would blubber my way through talking to the BO in that instance.

                            Clarification: Total it is 5 horses. 2 of mine, 2 students & 1 training horse
                            "The Friesian syndrome... a mix between Black Beauty disease and DQ Butterfly farting ailment." Alibi_18


                            • #15
                              You don't need to give her a reason. At all. No justifications. Remember - this is a business arrangement, not a friendship.

                              Give her a polite 30-days notice in writing and wait it out, if you can't, leave early. I know it's an unpleasant situation, but it's nothing more than a transaction.
                              They're small hearts.