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most clueless people you've met

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  • most clueless people you've met

    inspired by the bad trainer/bad student blues over on dressage, let's talk about the best examples of total cluelessness that you've encountered! no names, no locations please

    my favorite i think is a kid i knew who would "longe" her pony by attaching a longe line to the halter and running around the ring ahead of the pony, leading it with the line 30 ft behind her she was very grateful to be shown the correct way to longe the pony.

    so what laughable mishaps have you witnessed? this isn't meant to be mean, just fun, since lots of silly things can happen around horses!
  • Original Poster

    #2
    inspired by the bad trainer/bad student blues over on dressage, let's talk about the best examples of total cluelessness that you've encountered! no names, no locations please

    my favorite i think is a kid i knew who would "longe" her pony by attaching a longe line to the halter and running around the ring ahead of the pony, leading it with the line 30 ft behind her she was very grateful to be shown the correct way to longe the pony.

    so what laughable mishaps have you witnessed? this isn't meant to be mean, just fun, since lots of silly things can happen around horses!

    Comment


    • #3
      How about the woman who trailered home from a show (about ten miles)with the trailer ramp down. She said she wondered why so many people were honking at her.

      Comment


      • #4
        13 or so year old kid who had been taking lessons somewhere else for about a year seriously thinking she could ride in short daisy dukes and slip on platform strappy open toed sandals, just cuz she was on vacation and only wanted a trail ride.

        Comment


        • #5
          Woman, a rank beginner hired me to help teach her things and advise her what to do. I thought that while this wasn't ideal (go buy horses THEN ask what to do), at least she was smart enough to want to learn. Or so I thought, because every time I told her something she argued/refused to listen. I had 20+ years around horses, she had less than 1. Yet she wouldn't listen to a word I said and always had a reason or excuse why she didn't have to listen to my advice. (i.e. I've never had a problem before... and you have how much experience to draw upon to reach this conclusion???? If you know so much, why am I wasting my time here???)

          The woman had a TB gelding she couldn't ride (afraid of him), a perfectly suitable non-TB gelding she WOULDN'T ride (because he wasn't a TB and therefore "not good enough for her"). She then went out and bought a 2 yo filly because "she always wanted a baby", although she had no knowledge of working with MADE horses much less babies. She was advised not to because of her lack of knowledge and space considerations. Didn't really have room for a 3rd horse to begin with, had hot wire fencing that mostly didn't work, and very little in the way of real grazing.

          Was informed by me that the two geldings would fight over the filly. (Nonsense! They'll love her.) After 3rd day, filly impaled herself on a door after one of the geldings cornered her in an open stall (yes, she left all stall doors open so horses could come and go, although she was advised not to for this very reason). She couldn't administer medicine herself to half-wild 2 year old and wanted me to do it.

          My reply: I think not, since you know everything and wouldn't listen to sound advice, you can call the vet and pay the price. I'm outta here.

          ~<>~ COTHBB Leather Care Guru~<>~
          ~Member of the *Horse Vans* clique~

          "Learn the rules so you may break them effectively"~Dalai Lama

          Comment


          • #6
            I worked for this lady last summer who had a stable at her house. She had a cattle guard (those pipe things in the ground) to keep the horses in, but so she didn't have to open the gate to drive to her house.

            Well, the horses were jumping out, so THE GENIUS THAT SHE WAS put in TWO so they couldn't jump out. Well, one horse tried to jump out, and I don't want to go into the gory details, but I found it that morning and he had to be put down.

            I quit shortly after that, I felt bad for her losing her horse and all, but SHE WAS SO CLUELESS - and that's being nice!!

            Madie

            *Bo Frost*
            *American Voodoo*

            Comment


            • #7
              All the BBer's who have posted pics of their riding, asked to be critiqued, then got offended when folks gave opinions. Clueless.

              Comment


              • #8
                Middle-aged timid, inexperienced lady who decided to pull a ~11 year old QH Stallion who'd been standing in the field unworked for nearly a decade, geld him, and make him into her riding horse.

                Oy.

                Proud Member: Bull-snap Haters Clique, Michigan Clique, and Appaloosa Clique!
                Proud Member: Bull-snap Haters Clique, Michigan Clique, and Appaloosa Clique!

                Comment


                • #9
                  One of the weirdest things I ever saw was when I was still a junior and the girl who was #1 in the academic rankings at my school (I went to a prep school, so these things were important), decided she wanted to take lessons at my barn. She was nice, but a very confident know-it-all type who was used to being able to master anything immediately. She had taken lessons a couple of years before, and had learned to jump, and I think she thought it would be like getting back on a bike. Although I was doing the junior hunters on the A circuit at this point, my trainer would stick her in some of my equitation lessons. Three times, when I was trotting along behind her, she on a quiet and easy to ride schoolie, she went from riding perfectly centered to tilting to the side until she was so far tilted that she plopped onto the ground. It was one of the weirdest things I have ever seen in my life- it looked like someone had put a mannequin on a horse and it was slipping sideways. Her back was still perfectly straight the whole time, too, which made it absolutely incredible to watch. Three times. Finally, my trainer, who was looking a little flabbergasted, said- "Jane, you have to actually *grip* the saddle with your legs." She said, "Oh, I thought that you weren't supposed to really touch the horse with your legs, since that would make him gallop."

                  She finally figured out the legs thing, but it was like watching a robot ride- I think she really couldn't understand how to relate to the horse as a living, fluid being, but instead wanted to be able to drive it like a car. After a few months, she gave up and went back to being Miss Smarty-pants at school and super athelete on the soccer field, where things were easier to control!

                  You can take a line and say it isn't straight- but that wont change its shape. Jets to Brazil
                  You can take a line and say it isn't straight- but that won't change its shape. Jets to Brazil

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    One woman I met and taught lessons to that had dreams of becoming a grand prix rider-fell off at the walk-not just fell but flew. I horse stopped and looked at her like she was psycho! Sweet lady, great personality, but this was priceless!!

                    P.S.: she did change her goals-has decided that dressage is more her speed now. hehehe silly silly woman

                    Freddie

                    Proud servant and pet of an OTTB!

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      The people who bought the barn I board at last year; never had horses before, are clueless, and the woman is psycho.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        The most clueless thing I've witnessed? Sheesh, where to begin? Most were made by a fellow boarder who was there for only 3 short months. She made more clueless decisions and did more unexplainable things in those 3 months than I've seen in over 20 years of riding combined. She was well meaning...but clueless.
                        1) When lunging her horse in our large dressage sized ring...she didn't want anyone else in it or NEAR it. No movement allowed at ALL near the ring as it distracted her horse's energy. So after trying repeatedly to chase people out of the ring and barnyard, she started her lunging sessions (she never rode that I've seen) she would collect rocks and use them to define her "area" of the ring. She would then tie two lunger lines together and string them across the 65' wide ring from rail to rail up one end. Then proceed to hang blanket brought from home over them to hide the view from her horse. If you made ANY noise on the area of the ring left for use, she'd immediately pop up and tell you to "shush!" This behavior took the cake in her antics, but there are plenty more.
                        2) Different fellow boarder from last year. (Who thankfully moved out) Had a BNT complex and wasn't capable of telling a stud from a mare if it was laid out on it's back with all 4 in the air. She tried: Lunging her exra extra hot TB in it's 12x12 stall, complete with whip and lunge line. Riding her horse in it's 12x12 stall. Wanted the BO to lead her horse into the ring from the barn if she planned on lunging it outdoors. The ring gate is about 30 feet from the barn door. Would pour straight bleach into her horse's auto waterer to clean out the germs. And not rinse it back out or even empty the bleach out. Claimed she was a vet, a BNT, a jockey at Suffolk and an Animal Communicator. Depended on the day what she was. Fed her horse 18 quarts...yes 18...of high octane grain daily, 4 flakes of hay, every supplement known to man and didn't want her horse having more than 1 hour turnout daily. Never rode it, barely lunged it. Had it in blankets in summer, splint boots and hind wraps all year long in it's stall. And couldn't figure out why the 6 year old TB was a keg of gunpowder ready to explode.

                        Equine Crash Test Dummy
                        Member of: Non-GPA Clique
                        80's Clique
                        Connecticut Clique
                        Helmet Nazi Clique
                        You jump in the saddle,
                        Hold onto the bridle!
                        Jump in the line!
                        ...Belefonte

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          person who had owned three horses for years. Bought a new horse. He was delivered wearing a halter. New owner couldn't figure out how to take off a halter that didn't have a snap at the throatlatch (one of the ones where you have to un-buckle the crown piece), so the horse wore the halter all the time, even under the bridle, for at least six months before someone asked the owner about it.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Wow, MistyBlue. Just...wow. Horses sure do attract some nutters!

                            ____________________________

                            Ipsa scientia potestas est...
                            Member of the Dutch Warmblood Clique!
                            "No, not anything goes, I said no rules!"

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              We had a new boarder come to our barn who was doing the prelim jumpers and I and another boarder were sitting there watching her school her jumper, she was doing about a 15 meter circle at the cross canter, not an easy feat, the gal sitting next to me (the barn expert ) say's "she's not such a great rider, look she's in the wrong lead! Made me chuckle
                              NO HORSES TO SLAUGHTER CLIQUE
                              http://www.cafepress.com/maneshirts

                              Comment


                              • #16
                                <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Clive's Mom:
                                All the BBer's who have posted pics of their riding, asked to be critiqued, then got offended when folks gave opinions. Clueless.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>



                                ****
                                NEW YORK HORSE RESCUE

                                Comment


                                • #17
                                  <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by MistyBlue:
                                  The most clueless thing I've witnessed? Sheesh, where to begin? Most were made by a fellow boarder who was there for only 3 short months. She made more clueless decisions and did more unexplainable things in those 3 months than I've seen in over 20 years of riding combined. She was well meaning...but clueless.
                                  1) When lunging her horse in our large dressage sized ring...she didn't want anyone else in it or NEAR it. No movement allowed at ALL near the ring as it distracted her horse's energy. So after trying repeatedly to chase people out of the ring and barnyard, she started her lunging sessions (she never rode that I've seen) she would collect rocks and use them to define her "area" of the ring. She would then tie two lunger lines together and string them across the 65' wide ring from rail to rail up one end. Then proceed to hang blanket brought from home over them to hide the view from her horse. If you made ANY noise on the area of the ring left for use, she'd immediately pop up and tell you to "shush!" This behavior took the cake in her antics, but there are plenty more.
                                  2) Different fellow boarder from last year. (Who thankfully moved out) Had a BNT complex and wasn't capable of telling a stud from a mare if it was laid out on it's back with all 4 in the air. She tried: Lunging her exra extra hot TB in it's 12x12 stall, complete with whip and lunge line. Riding her horse in it's 12x12 stall. Wanted the BO to lead her horse into the ring from the barn if she planned on lunging it outdoors. The ring gate is about 30 feet from the barn door. Would pour straight bleach into her horse's auto waterer to clean out the germs. And not rinse it back out or even empty the bleach out. Claimed she was a vet, a BNT, a jockey at Suffolk and an Animal Communicator. Depended on the day what she was. Fed her horse 18 quarts...yes 18...of high octane grain daily, 4 flakes of hay, every supplement known to man and didn't want her horse having more than 1 hour turnout daily. Never rode it, barely lunged it. Had it in blankets in summer, splint boots and hind wraps all year long in it's stall. And couldn't figure out why the 6 year old TB was a keg of gunpowder ready to explode.

                                  Equine Crash Test Dummy
                                  Member of: Non-GPA Clique
                                  80's Clique
                                  Connecticut Clique
                                  Helmet Nazi Clique
                                  <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>


                                  Don't even think I could be lunged in that little of a stall .
                                  NO HORSES TO SLAUGHTER CLIQUE
                                  http://www.cafepress.com/maneshirts

                                  Comment


                                  • #18
                                    how about someone who trailered our horses to a show once and the entire time we were on the highway he had a flat tire...we called his cell phone and would tell him and he knew?!...he didnt do anything until we had everyone call him to tell him to pull over (we went with atleast 7 other riders!)

                                    Caroline

                                    ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
                                    un-rated pony clubber and PROUD!

                                    O'Connor obesser extrodinar!...lol (ya have to know me to really get it)

                                    pony ride gone lesson kid gone barn bum gone hunter gone jumper gone eventer gone horse owner gone pony cluber gone crazy!
                                    "Just say what you think and write what you feel and eventually someone somewhere will appreciate it. And that’s all you can ask for." -CRD

                                    Comment


                                    • #19
                                      a couple of summers ago i went look at some ponies that belonged to some people in my area. they were western riders, mainly reining. anyways, they had bought 4 ponies that they wanted to resale. the owner, who has grown up around horses, showed the ponies to us. after we had watched the last one go we were standing around with it talking. then she leans over and starts staring under the horse's belly with a weird look on her face. so naturally we looked to see what she was looking at and didn't see anything, so we asked her what was the matter. so she replies "is that a mare or gelding?"

                                      Comment


                                      • #20
                                        The best thing I ever saw was one year in FL. The king of equitation was giving a lesson. I was slowly riding by trying to listen in and learn when he asked the class to do a shoulder-in. Two out of three riders were doing it and the third kept trotting. He kept saying shoulder-in louder and louder. Finally he said to the third rider do you know what a shoulder-in is and her response was "yes, sir". He told her to Then Do It! She grabbed her outside shoulder with her inside hand and pulled her shoulder in to towards inside of the ring. The trainer put his bullhorn down and lowered his head without saying a word. I have to think I witnessed one of the few times he has ever been left speechless.

                                        Comment

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