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Am I Over-reacting?

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  • #41
    Move. BO's can do whatever they please and then attempt to lien the horse if you try to go... A contract won't guarantee that they will stop being jerks, but if push comes to shove (for instance, they prevent you from removing the horse), you can summon police, or at the very least, defend yourself in small claims court. People that don't "own their mistakes" are dangerous, so my legal advice is to leave now.

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    • Original Poster

      #42
      Originally posted by meupatdoes View Post
      Leave. Now. Don't even bother having a big kumbaya let's-talk-this-out fest.

      Hopefully you did not hand them a board check before they left to go get your horse. Because I most certainly would not be paying it and my horse would be out that evening.

      If you did pay board already then leave as soon as you can find a stall get a trailer out of there. Notice mcSchmotice they are paid and your empty stall is the notice.


      And can I just ask?
      Who the hell spends AN HOUR at Tim Horton's?
      Tim Horton's is basically the equivalent of Dunkin' Donuts, for those not in the northerly regions. There are no tables or chairs. It is not Starbucks where you sit around on the WiFi in a comfy chair. They do not ask you "for here or to go" because there IS NO "for here."
      You get your coffee and your donut and you leave.
      Nobody "dines" at Tim Hortons for hours.


      Were you there when they loaded him?
      Because they are lying about something.
      Yes, I loaded her myself and got my things together then went to their barn and waited from 11:30- 2:00PM
      Husband of b/o, who was with her, advised me that b/o wanted to get a sandwich so they stopped at tim's to eat.
      http://dotstreamming.blogspot.com/

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      • #43
        The stupidity of stopping for a snack aside; she knew you were waiting for them at the barn. She had to know you were getting worried. Why not text you and say that things are fine, their errand took longer than they expected?

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        • #44
          Originally posted by findeight View Post
          Forget 30 days. Not only is nothing in writing, she gave you 25 days notice of the board increase and none at all on the blanket charges.

          No single thing is that outlandish but taken together? Shows an enormous amount of disorganization and possibly irresponsibility hinting at worse to come.

          Get out of there.
          I agree with this - no single thing is outlandish individually but all taken together... the trailer experience would bother me though (but if it were the only negative occurance I might have looked past it). You never leave an unknown horse (and a young inexperienced one at that) on the trailer for 2 hours for the sake of an extended coffee break. I get that your day might have been busy and you might have needed a stop but in that case you make it quick and to go. It's one thing to take calculated risks with your own horses or to ask your been-there-done-that horses to wait on the trailer while you grab a lunch, but it's unprofessional imo to have left an unknown 3yo client horse on a trailer for 2 hours for no good reason than self-indulgence. Nevermind the fact she was not on time for you, to boot, and made you wait for so long without communication. That's just plain disrespectful and ignorant.

          I would not have said anything either though until I had an alternative boarding option. If the care is otherwise good (and you specify it is), there is no point rushing into perhaps a worse situation.

          Why would you ask the other boarders - who you say are chummy with the BO - if this is a regular occurrence?? She did these things without even being familiar with you; it was your first real experience with her. She's put her best foot forward, you know how she operates. Don't risk the drama that can come of snooping around.

          As a sidenote, while the BO might be lying about spending an hour at Timmy's, there are actually tables and chairs at a lot of Tim's.
          Last edited by naturalequus; Dec. 7, 2011, 06:22 PM.
          ....horses should be trained in such a way that they not only love their riders, but look forward to the time they are with them.
          ~ Xenophon, 350 B.C.

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          • #45
            Your BO is an idiot.

            However, a good trainer friend of mine picked up Baby Horse for me to take to her new barn and made us stop at Taco Bell on the way. And we "dined" inside. Baby Horse had to man up and eat his own "Taco Bell" in the hay net in the rig.

            No, the trainer was not a bad horsewoman or unprofessional. I am just letting you know that pulling over for people to eat and stiffing the waiting horses is done from time to time.

            I think a horse's price would go up if it could be counted on to wait on a trailer. And Baby Horse when older and back with his doting, ammy mama took up the habit of pawing in the trailer when mom didn't unload the shavings and all quite fast enough at the show after we had pulled in.

            Maybe the trainer was right.....
            The armchair saddler
            Politically Pro-Cat

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            • #46
              Originally posted by pryme_thyme View Post

              But I keep hearing from family and friends to ask if this is typical before leaving...
              NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. DON'T DO THAT.

              It is NOT a good idea and all that will happen is some other boarder will tell her and she will accuse you of badmouthing her-then you won't have to worry about how to leave. She'll give you an hour to get out and throw your stuff on the street. BTDT....asked another boarder if they had checked the hay their horses had, mine was moldy. They went right to BO and I was given 12 hours to get out and threatened with a lawsuit for slander.

              Keep mouth shut and ears open, not vice versa. And start looking for another place.

              Oh and the stop? OP was waiting for over an hour for them after SHE loaded the horse and drove the 15 minutes ahead to meet them at the new barn.

              Had a thought, you suppose "timmys" is code for something else???? Place is a cross between Dennys and Dunkin Donuts and for the life of me, can't see being in there for an hour. Perhaps it's code for a place serving stronger then coffee? That would explain being there longer and some of the erratic behavior...not to mention the horse banging around unnoticed (OP was there to load it and it did not get banged up there).
              When opportunity knocks it's wearing overalls and looks like work.

              The horse world. Two people. Three opinions.

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              • #47
                Originally posted by pryme_thyme View Post
                You think so? My first thought was to not say a thing since everyone seems pretty chummy with her.

                But I keep hearing from family and friends to ask if this is typical before leaving...
                Yes, I think so. I really, really think so. Are your family and friends horse people? If not, then I would take anything they say about this situation with a grain of salt. We are not talking about a rational industry here, and non-horse friends are probably thinking that this is just like any other business relationship. It most assuredly is not.

                If they ARE horse people, I guess I would ask them what they think you stand to gain by going asking such questions. I think it will only be perceived as stirring up trouble, which you certainly don't want.

                Comment


                • #48
                  Originally posted by mvp View Post
                  Baby Horse had to man up and eat his own "Taco Bell" in the hay net in the rig.

                  No, the trainer was not a bad horsewoman or unprofessional. I am just letting you know that pulling over for people to eat and stiffing the waiting horses is done from time to time.
                  Imo you don't do it however with someone else's horse without their permission. Especially not when that someone else is waiting patiently for you at your barn. Unprofessional and lacking horsemanship.

                  Some babies or horses you can make wait, others you need to put more training on (prior and proper preparation) before expecting them to wait in a trailer for extended periods of time - imo. The BO did not know this horse and whether asking this baby to wait in the trailer was appropriate at this stage in the baby's training; horses can do a lot of damage in a trailer in a short period of time.
                  ....horses should be trained in such a way that they not only love their riders, but look forward to the time they are with them.
                  ~ Xenophon, 350 B.C.

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                  • #49
                    No I wouldn't say anything to the other boarders especially if they are chummy with BO. I think it all sounds incredibly unprofessional and I think you're best off away from there. BO doesn't sound like she knows what she's doing

                    Comment


                    • #50
                      I don't know who or what a Tim/Tom Hortons is...but honestly. That is irresponsible.

                      What's next? I saw your horse colicking/gashed on wire/stuck on a fence board/lamed with a slid shoe...but I had my slippers on and did not want to get my nails dirty.

                      WTF?

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                      • #51
                        Thank you, N. Equus... exactly right. You don't take liberties with someone else's horse, esp. a young one. Several cuts on his face? Not all right with me. What was going on? And this bo never noticed?

                        I sure hope, OP, you get out of there pronto. She absolutely couldn't care less about you or your horse, clearly evident in that she barely remembered she had something in the trailer when she pulled in for her extended coffee break.

                        She is pathetic, that bo.

                        Comment


                        • #52
                          I would be furious with everything. BO can stuff her face on her time, not mine. Cuts on face = unacceptable, probably happened when BO was stuffing her face.
                          Increase in board and services, BO should have disclosed this prior to you moving in. If it was me, I would start looking for a new barn. BO doesn't sound like she gives a crap.

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                          • #53
                            Originally posted by meupatdoes View Post
                            Leave. And can I just ask?
                            Who the hell spends AN HOUR at Tim Horton's?
                            Tim Horton's is basically the equivalent of Dunkin' Donuts, for those not in the northerly regions. There are no tables or chairs. It is not Starbucks where you sit around on the WiFi in a comfy chair. They do not ask you "for here or to go" because there IS NO "for here."
                            You get your coffee and your donut and you leave.
                            Nobody "dines" at Tim Hortons for hours.
                            Exactly! While some Tim Horton's have tables/chairs - they are like what you'd find at McDonalds, and not exactly comfy. I can't ever imagine needing an hour to eat there! You get your coffee, doughnut or sandwich within 2-3 minutes of ordering, and you are good to go.

                            I'm with the camp that says there is more to the story...

                            and like others are saying, don't rock the boat for now, just grin and bear it while looking for somewhere else to go.

                            Comment


                            • #54
                              Originally posted by Janeway View Post
                              Exactly! While some Tim Horton's have tables/chairs - they are like what you'd find at McDonalds, and not exactly comfy. I can't ever imagine needing an hour to eat there! You get your coffee, doughnut or sandwich within 2-3 minutes of ordering, and you are good to go.

                              I'm with the camp that says there is more to the story...

                              and like others are saying, don't rock the boat for now, just grin and bear it while looking for somewhere else to go.
                              Add me to the "How is this even possible?" camp... I'd never begrudge someone stopping and grabbing a cup of coffee, but seriously, you could pull in, walk inside, order, get your stuff, and be out the door in well under 10 minutes, and that's if there was a line. I honestly don't know how a person could suck up a whole hour at a Tim Horton's... heck, hubby and I are usually out of sit-down full-service restaurants in less time than that.
                              *friend of bar.ka

                              "Evidently, I am an unrepentant b*tch, possible trouble maker, and all around super villian"

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                              • #55
                                Originally posted by fordtraktor View Post
                                Frankly, the trailering would bother me -- I do not think is is great horsemanship for someone to pick up a 3 year old who is not used to trailering, park it for over an hour in a Tim Horton's parking lot, and go eat leaving the youngster in the parking lot. Especially when you are only moving the horse 15 miles. Take the darn horse home and then get your lunch. Or better yet, eat beforehand so you can stick around and ensure the new horse settles well. I cannot imagine doing that, personally and I've been hauling horses all over the East Coast since the day I turned 16.

                                OP, I think you are taking this all very calmly. Time to look for another place. Sorry it didn't work out!
                                I agree! The trailering would bother me the most....then I would be pissed about the sudden changes in the board agreement. MOVE!
                                Save a life...be an organ donor! Visit www.Transplantbuddies.org

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                                • #56
                                  All right, you people. I'm starting a spin-off thread on Off Course. Look for it.
                                  The armchair saddler
                                  Politically Pro-Cat

                                  Comment


                                  • #57
                                    Originally posted by meupatdoes View Post
                                    Who the hell spends AN HOUR at Tim Horton's?
                                    ...You get your coffee and your donut and you leave.
                                    Nobody "dines" at Tim Hortons for hours.

                                    Were you there when they loaded him?
                                    Because they are lying about something.
                                    I have been reading through this thread and waiting for someone (thank you Meupatdoes) to call BS on the "an hour at TH's" story.

                                    It just sounds off. And this concerns me more.

                                    My guess (since you say she's been in business for more than a minute) is she knows waaaay better than to jack off for an hour and leave a youngster on a trailer she knows very little about...esp a new client!

                                    I suspect something else shady happened (how did she get scrapes all over her face?!) and the TH story was whipped up on the fly.

                                    I dunno....If only horses could talk , ehh?

                                    Get outta there!
                                    Barn rat for life

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                                    • #58
                                      Originally posted by Janeway View Post
                                      Exactly! While some Tim Horton's have tables/chairs - they are like what you'd find at McDonalds, and not exactly comfy. I can't ever imagine needing an hour to eat there! You get your coffee, doughnut or sandwich within 2-3 minutes of ordering, and you are good to go.

                                      I'm with the camp that says there is more to the story...

                                      and like others are saying, don't rock the boat for now, just grin and bear it while looking for somewhere else to go.
                                      The most complicated thing I can think of at Tim Horton's is chili, maybe? (I've never been in one that DIDN'T have tables and chairs, and they're definitely nicer than Dunkin Donuts.) Still, an hour seems rather exaggerated.

                                      As far as trailering goes, I would be less concerned with stopping (they need to learn to stand, full stop) but I would be more put out by picking up another horse. Depending on the trailer layout, how long it takes to load, how IT ships, plus just I would think you paid for a solo haul, that could screw things up more than making Pookie wait. I can see getting coffee if you're passing by, I don't see "forgetting" to mention that oh yeah, we've got another stop. Goes with "forgetting" there's a charge to blanket, forgetting to mention board is going up in less than a month (which is a reasonable time to do it, I agree, it's not the increased board, it's when it was mentioned.)
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                                      • Original Poster

                                        #59
                                        Originally posted by TalkIsCheap View Post
                                        I don't know who or what a Tim/Tom Hortons is...but honestly. That is irresponsible.

                                        What's next? I saw your horse colicking/gashed on wire/stuck on a fence board/lamed with a slid shoe...but I had my slippers on and did not want to get my nails dirty.
                                        LOVE this!
                                        Thank you for the giggle.


                                        Out tonight, my horse is lame in the hock, mildy and not likely related to any type of preventable occurrence since she is clumsy but just another one to add to the 'manure' pile.

                                        I am moving back to my previous barn and cutting the $400 loss. My old B/O has bent over backwards and got a trailer to take me to shows
                                        http://dotstreamming.blogspot.com/

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                                        • #60
                                          Yeah i'd be off like a prom dress. I have better things to do than wait for 2+ hrs for someone.
                                          "Sadly, some people's greatest skill, is being an idiot". (facebook profile pic I saw).

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