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Can we have an adult re-rider support group?

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  • spacytracy
    started a topic Can we have an adult re-rider support group?

    Can we have an adult re-rider support group?

    Maybe we already do, in which case, sorry!

    I have had a rough week and I'm possibly over-analysing this, but I'm sure other re-riders have had these feelings too.

    I'm a working mom, and I have a fabulous, diamond-in-the-rough OTTB, who is green but learning EVERY day and is just a gem. He's awesome. We're working on straightness, doing some canter work, and cross-rails for fun. He's really smart, in a very good way. You tell him what you want and he goes "ok!".

    The thing is? I don't know HOW to tell him. I'm a capable rider, but have lost so much coordination and that instinct of what to do, that I'm basically starting over, when he is too.

    Thankfully, I have a really great trainer who is extremely sympathetic and helpful.

    Part of me is like WTF was I thinking getting this green horse. Another is like WTF is wrong with me, and maybe I'll never get better. Another is why am I even bothering trying to improve?

    I know this horse will be amazing. And he's ridden 4x/week by other people under trainer supervision and is doing amazing. So even if I can only ride him once a week, he's better every time I do. So that's a +1.

    The thing with me is, I can ride my other horse fine. I rode him yesterday, took him over a 2'3"/2'6" jump, no problem and no getting ahead (my big problem).

    Try to trot a X-rail on the new horse and I'm flopping around like a fish. My weakness is really made obvious with smaller, trot fences.

    I've really been thinking that I need to get my core in shape and I think that will help me. But WHEN? I have a 3 year old, a job, a house, and the horses. Oh, and a husband too. lol

    Sorry, I'm rambling. I know what I want, but I feel like I don't have the time, and I don't have the ability! I would love to know that I'm not the only one going through this!!!

    I did enjoy reading other re-rider threads, and knowing I'm not the only one, and that there's no shame in entering the long-stirrups for awhile to get my feet wet!

  • anotherfinemess
    I'm glad you all are making it thru this crazy times one way or another. I know it's really tough for those of you without your horse time.

    greys I love Hudson's attitude! No negative thoughts, just come on we're jumping the jumps, isn't it Fun! Plus he's so adjustable and ridable. I can see why you're so happy with the job your trainer has done!

    Sugar I'm not surprised they shut down your barn. Your side of the state has really been hit hard and it's not going to let up for awhile. Now you have the time to get your new place just how you want it!

    PF I hope your run of bad luck is over for now. The highs and lows of horses! Looks like you're having fun with Tay tho.

    Suzie Good luck with your new job!

    lucky I'm sure it's scary times for you and your patients. Sorry you can't have Pony time to help relieve the stress. I've been watching videos also, it's a good time to add some knowledge.

    Mustang Would you please DM me your IG? I would love to see puppy pics. Last month I had to put our 15 year old dog to sleep. That makes 4 dogs in 4 years that we've had to say goodbye to. They all made it to a ripe old age and had a great life but it doesn't make it any easier. We still have 2 dogs and for now that is enough. I know eventually another dog will find it's way into my life, but for now I'm just loving pics of other people's pups. Sugar has an adorable boxer pup.

    Austen I hope you made it home and all is well. Too bad your time in FL was cut short but it looks like it was great while it lasted!

    NC It is a good time to get your tack together with all the good sales going on. Hope it isn't too much longer before you can meet your possible lease. Like you said it won't hurt for him to get more miles with the trainer for now.

    Faye I was very impressed by your pushups on IG! I tried and utterly failed. When we had our car wreck my elbow was dislocated and luckily it isn't painful but it doesn't bend correctly, sort of at a weird angle and that arm is shorter than the other one now. That makes for a very lopsided pushup and it was ugly! Funny but ugly!

    Cupid Glad you are able to ride for now and working on the basics is always a good thing. That's great that you have open land next to you and are able to get out.

    I have been staying here on our little farm and avoiding the chaos as much as possible. Got stocked up on people, pet and horse feed and supplies and are just staying put. DH is very high risk with his long list of medical issues so we aren't taking any chances. I will have to venture out next week to get his meds but will glove and mask and take all disinfecting precautions. It's strange how fast this has become our new normal and it will be very interesting to see what "normal" looks like when this is all done.

    We live in a very rural area, we don't even have a stoplight in our entire county, and should be fairly low risk except for the fact that the Amish refuse to take this seriously. Our town only has 500 people but the Amish community numbers between 1500 and 2000. We are the only "English" in our neighborhood and I have had to cut ourselves off from them. Normally the neighbors are here quite a lot because although they can't use electricity or technology it doesn't mean they can't use ours. So on our back porch we have a table that is the neighborhood battery charging station for all the batteries for their power tools. I order tons of stuff from Amazon for them, they come and I pull up whatever it is they are wanting and they chose and I order it for them. I also have a part-time job driving them here there and everywhere. I take pics of horses they have for sale and send them to prospective buyers.

    So we had to stop all of that. They refuse to acknowledge the seriousness of the situation. They know, they read the paper and they listen to the news on their phones, but for some reason they think it won't affect them. The County Health Dept finally had to close their schools and churches because they wouldn't do it voluntarily, but their stores are still open, they still have large family gatherings, they are still traveling, and there are 7 crews of men and teenage boys that travel to Kansas City everyday to build houses and then come home and mingle, plus all the teenagers get together and party every weekend. It's just a huge petri dish just waiting to explode. Last week just across the border in Iowa they had a horse sale. The state tried to shut it down but they got an agricultural exemption because they farm with horses. This wasn't a draft sale it was a standardbred sale so essentially driving horses but they still got the exemption. The best the health dept could do was make them register. The men wouldn't let their wives and kids register but there were almost 500 registered with an est number of 650 from 8 different states. That is the kind of shit that will keep the rest of us dealing with this much longer than we would have to if they would just keep their stupid asses home! Our governor is dragging his feet with a stay at home order but I doubt they would obey it anyway. I have a lot of Amish friends but damn they can be pigheaded and I have no problem telling them that, they just laugh and agree! So because of all that DH and I have been self quarantined for 3 weeks with many more to go. Sorry to get off topic with a non horse related rant.

    I am very lucky to be home with my horses and that part of live is normal. Still haven't ridden because of the mud but will soon hopefully. Still doing groundwork with AJ and have now started it with Quincy also. Amazing results and having so much fun figuring it out and seeing where it takes us.

    Leave a comment:

  • luckymaverick
    Mustang- I’ve only done FaceTime one time. Fab and I did text last night and she knows to give Pony extra cuddles from me. I went through my phone and kept the cutest Pony pics and that helped 🙂

    Rider- I haven’t checked out those resources. Thanks for the ideas!

    Greys- you and Hudson are such a dynamic pair- I love to watch the wheels turn for him! And how cool about McClain. I love to watch him as well.

    PF- Please keep giving riding/horse updates. It’s my only real horse fix 😛. On a side note, Tay is such a cute jumper.

    Leave a comment:

  • SugarCubes
    Greys - I somehow missed your last post, but congratulations! That was an awesome round to watch, you look incredible!!

    I think this is going to be a struggle for all equestrians, suddenly the thing we do every day has been taken away indefinitely. Thank god for our dedicated trainers who we can trust to take care of our horses and keep them going! As hard as it is, I keep telling myself to be excited for how much further along Lucca will be once I can ride again! Got to look at the bright side!

    Leave a comment:

  • SugarCubes
    Well, the decision was made for me. Our barn has shut down to everyone except for workers and my trainer. I left a months supply of meds/supplements, had a great last ride and kissed both ponies before leaving yesterday. It's a sad and surreal feeling not knowing when I'll see them again. My trainer will keep Lucca going, and Cash will get a much needed break enjoying lots of turnout.

    PF- I think those with their horses at home are the lucky ones right now, don't feel quilty! I SO wish mine were home right now, for many reasons, but the chores would be a welcome addition right now when there's not much to do at home! Have you looked into Instacart for grocery delivery? Now that we're out pretty far I didn't think anyone would deliver but they will actually bring us groceries from a few different stores.

    Cupid - It's not set up yet, but I can quickly make it work in a pinch. I have a few areas where I need to fix the fencing and then the pasture is good to go. The barn doesn't have stalls yet, but I can do something temporarily if this is going to last longer than a month and I decide to bring them home. I'm surprised your barn is still open! How are things in your area?

    Suzie - Yes, that's very similar to the exercise I was describing to Mustang. It really helps wake her up and gets her more responsive to my aids.

    Leave a comment:

  • SuzieQNutter
    Originally posted by ParadoxFarm View Post
    I can't even get pizza delivered, so I have to pick up groceries.
    We can't get pizza delivered. We don't even get rubbish bins! I went further than our property yesterday to deliver groceries.

    Leave a comment:

  • ParadoxFarm
    I can't even get pizza delivered, so I have to pick up groceries.

    Leave a comment:

  • SuzieQNutter
    PF How much does it cost for you to get the groceries delivered? In our town I think it is $5.00 so that is pretty cheap to not go into town. It is a bit more to go out of town but we do do it.

    Greys we all feel that way. Next to someone who has never ridden or has only ridden for a few years, I am a few rungs up the ladder.

    When I think of Charlotte Djardin and her trainer, I feel that I haven't even reached the first rung.

    Sugar a great exercise for getting a horse forward, but can be too heating for a hot horse, so use with care! Is to canter on a 20 m circle, trot 3 strides and canter a circle, trot 3 strides and canter, trot 3 strides and canter. Rinse and repeat.

    I was taught this in a lesson with my instructor on a school horse and it is fantastic. I then went home and tried it on Stars and it did nothing but anger him. He had given me a canter transition why the #### are you asking again.

    So I taught it to him on the lunge with plenty of praise for the trot transition and then plenty of praise for the canter transition. He is normal about it now. As he is not a forward horse I had no trouble with him cantering without being asked. I have not done this exercise on Dodge or Sim. Sim would be offering canter on his own if I did I am sure. Not something you want with him if he has had time off!

    I got burnt yesterday. You don't realise how much you are outside packing the car and then delivering the bags to the door.

    I will essentially start 2 hours earlier today. Yesterday they said to start an hour later and then training for an hour.

    I asked if I should bring eskies and was told no. I did put one in.

    You need eskies. I borrowed 2 big foam boxes from one of the other drivers. I still have them in my car. I will add our big esky on the back seat and I will take plenty of fold up eskies as some people just get a box or tub of icecream so they will be handy for that.

    The third guy will not know what has hit him. I know we are competing and I am competitive and am looking to out do him so that it is my job after this covid19 thing is over. To get a job in town is very difficult. I had a job as an office manager but they closed down, after not implementing one idea that my hubby and I put in about how to improve things and we wrote 2 x A4 pages when asked for suggestions!!!

    It won't be hard. One frail 90 yo he refused to take it up the steps for her as he does not get paid for that. One lady told him she felt unwell. He told her that was because of all the crap he was delivering. Her daughter was there, heard that and came down to the store to tell them to NEVER send him again. That is when the guy that trained me started. He is older and actually brings the bread into the store. He is not competitive. The third guy also refuses to do out of town jobs so the older guy does them

    I was brought up playing games by my mother. She taught me chess. I don't play but I can. I can hear the rules of a game and know how to win before playing. I went snuba diving once. That is with you having the scuba tanks on the surface and you snorkeling under the water. I would say I was 16yo.

    20 something yo male. Full of himself. Said he had to get me used to being underwater. I said that was not a problem. He said we would go down and play checkers. I said I had never played. He said that didn't matter as he always wins anyway. He told me the rules. We went under the water. I beat him. That was the first time I met the male ego. It is a very fragile thing isn't it?

    I downloaded prize fiesta on the phone. You play for real prizes. I read every rule. I knew how to play before playing. People have been playing for 2 years and have not figured it out. I finally divulged my secret on Facebook. Long term players are now using my method. I would love to be the first person to claim the car, but I will probably go for the samsung phone and an android tablet.

    As I said this other guy doesn't know what will hit him. Muhahahaha.

    Oh and I get paid today in cash!

    I did 14 deliveries yesterday. One with 11 bags. One out of town. Of course my biggest competitor will be me. I will compete against myself as well. On my 2nd trip back yesterday I picked the ones with over 6 bags. He picks the closest ones. You want the closest ones with 6 bags and over.

    I have been playing prize fiesta while typing this to stay in triple mode. Never underestimate a woman on a mission!

    Last edited by SuzieQNutter; Apr. 3, 2020, 02:41 PM.

    Leave a comment:

  • Training Cupid
    NC - What's M&M? Not that I need another place to shop! I'm a sucker for sales even though I pretty much have everything I need and more, but I picked up Roeckl gloves from RW. I'm interested to see if they last longer then the cheap Heritage and SSG ones I've been buying.
    I just finished Tik Maynard's book, In the Middle are the Horsemen. I thought it was a good read (it's a bio, not how-to)

    Greys - Good to hear from you! How's your new guy? Are he and Hudson similar rides?

    Paradox - Don't feel guilty! You've had more then your fair share of missed riding already the past year or two!!
    How's Surge's foot? I hope it works out with your trainer that he can work with you two more!

    Lucky - Hugs to you.

    Sugar - Are you going to bring your horses home? I forget if it's set up for riding.

    I've been riding, mostly trying to fill some holes like my nagging leg and improving responsiveness, and being more consistent in the contact. Cupid is doing well.

    Leave a comment:

  • ParadoxFarm
    Last night our governor finally issued the stay-at-home order. I feel guilty at times that my horses are at home and I can see them and do what I want with them. I've pretty much been home for the last few weeks, though. I venture out for groceries, but try to do the order-ahead thing and pick up at the store. I have to get some feed, but they, too, let me order and pay by phone and just park at the store and they bring it out and load up the bed of the truck.

    Leave a comment:

  • SugarCubes
    RiderNC - Ha! That saddle pad might be a little big for him

    PF - I saw VJ's Instagram post about Ricky, so sad. I need to reach out to her. Glad to hear it's just an abscess, hopefully he's feeling better!

    Mustang - My mare is your typical lazy warmblood who can be resistant to the leg, and will buck if I get after her too much, so I have to be strategic with exercises that get her thinking and moving forward without crossing that line and pissing her off I've been doing one exercise to warmup where you pick 4 points in the arena on a 20m circle and start by doing walk-trot-walk transitions at each point. Once she's getting more responsive to those, we do the same thing but using the whole arena, but now incorporating canter transitions. Next, I start transitions within the gait, but asking for the lengthening on the short sides rather than the long sides since that's where she can suck back a bit. Last, I'll go down the quarter line at trot, leg yield to the rail, then pick up canter in the corner. She's just starting to learn some lateral work so this has been a great one for her.

    Lucky - I've thought a lot about people in assisted living during this ordeal and feel so sad for them not to be able to see their families. Thank for you all you're doing. Stay safe!

    Suzie - Stay healthy and be safe!

    I've been conflicted this week about going to the barn. Covid-19 cases are absolutely exploding in my area and they're predicting we'll be the next hot spot. We all have specific times to ride, and each time slot only allows 5 riders to be at the barn at once, but no matter how much sanitizing is done there is still a risk. Especially when we have a lot of teenage riders who are still seeing their friends/boyfriends and don't remember to stay 6' away.

    I plan to talk to my trainer about it today, my horses will be fine with some time off, especially with no shows on the horizon

    Are you all still going to the barn? Have any of your barns closed?

    Leave a comment:

  • ridernc
    Mustang: I am also lucky to keep my job (I work 100% remote already). We are hit hard by the schools closing as we're an educational technology company, but I'm being optimistic and trying to take advantage of not being so busy and getting things done. If you haven't read a few pages back, before all this started, I was trying to get a lease at my barn, and I finally had a potential care lease candidate arrive the first week of March. He is in training with my trainer this month, and I haven't gotten to ride him yet, but they think he may work for me given my affinity for another stubborn, buckskin gelding at the barn. I guess the benefit is that he is getting a lot more training now!

    Anyway, I've been wanting to get some basics since it's a care lease, not a school horse lease, so tack is not included. Then, with all this COVID stuff, it didn't seem like a bad idea to stop sharing some of the lesson horse tack (bridle, reins, whips, etc.). A lot of places have been doing sales, Dover always has a few running; SmartPak did a 5 day deals week; M&M has had some things going on; Riding Warehouse had 15% off everything, etc. My best deal was from a private seller; there are a LOT of people selling tack through Facebook groups right now. I was going to buy the beta version of the bridle for ~$79, but she was selling the padded leather version + reins (new with tags) for a third of the retail price. Super excited to get it!

    Lucky: Have you watch the new Madden Method lessons on YouTube? I watched the first one, and I liked it - very informal. I've also looked at the Noelle Floyd masterclasses because I've seen a lot of people raving about the Tik Maynard classes. I also saw an ad on Facebook that they are selling their annual subscription for half off right now ($99/year), so I was tempted.

    Greys: Congrats - the show sounds awesome! Those photos are gorgeous 😍

    Leave a comment:

  • greysfordays
    Hi guys

    I’m sorry I fell off the map. We’ve been sheltering in place here in CA for a while. My husband works in restaurants and I’m a portfolio manager in the stock market, so work has been nuts for us, but also trying to keep our 2 year old from killing himself. Oye

    My two horses are still in Florida. The bright side of this is I know they are both getting superb training and both making progress. I think they will stay most of April and I doubt I will ride before May. I miss it like crazy. But it’s been three weeks since I was in Florida for the Palm Beach Open. My first FEI show. The show itself was incredible, nothing like walking back from a school and having McLain admire your horse and smile hello... SadlyI didn’t ride my best until the last day. Hudson was absolutely superb, he didn’t put a foot wrong in any of our rounds, but I got in my own way. Our last round was our best. We also got some terrific pictures!

    A friend of mine got me a mental skills coaching session with Kip Rosenthal when she saw how much I beat myself up and the weird amount of pressure I put on myself worrying about disappointing my trainer. It was really helpful. I know BITSA has talked about it in the past, but I think if it’s something you’re considering doing, go for it. Now is a great time for introspection.

    Suzie You said something a few pages back about my being an upper level rider... I am so super flattered to hear you say that, but I certainly don’t feel that way. . I can relate to everything people say here most times, (though my goodness, what I would trade for some of your views Suzie!). We all have moments where we struggle with our emotions and a desire to ride better and appreciate a place that’s non-judgmental. I feel very embarrassed that I didn’t ride well at this big fancy show in front of my family and best friend. But that’s the sport right?

    Lastly, PF, jingles for your horses, choke is so super scary. EPM is also super scary. I know a few people who have had a ton of success with the EPM meds. Fingers crossed that helps him and the abscess passes quickly. What a brutal few weeks for you. Hang in there, surely the tide must turn soon.

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  • MustangTwist
    Lucky - That's a shame about your barn, but a completely understandable and responsible choice. Hope your trainer makes it through this okay. Do you think your trainer would Facetime you (or call you via Zoom) so you can see Pony? I hope you can find some more PPE for work. My cousin is a nurse in Seattle and her hospital is also dreadfully short.

    Suzie - I think the mask issue is a bit more complex than some of the articles/news stories would have you believe. First of all, effectiveness varies based on the type of mask and its usage. Improper usage could potentially lead to higher infection rates. Yes, healthy people who are following proper social distancing protocols shouldn't need to wear them. To the extent possible, we should save PPE for front-line workers who are at higher risk. At the same time, lots of us unconsciously touch our faces without realizing it. Wearing a mask can help heighten awareness and decrease transmission. Also, part of the problem with coronavirus is we don't typically know who is "sick" (i.e., infectious) and who isn't. There are a significant number of asymptomatic carriers, and we don't have solid data comparing transmission rates for asymptomatic v. symptomatic people yet. That said, best of luck at the new job!

    Leave a comment:

  • SuzieQNutter
    On the radio they are trying to get healthy people to stop wearing masks.

    Only sick people should wear masks and sick people should be staying at home anyway.

    Wearing masks when not sick can increase the infection rate. Especially if they are wearing the same mask for a week.

    I am starting a new job today. I am going to be delivering groceries to people's doors. They have to be home though. I am being given a bottle of hand sanitizer and I have to use it between customers. They are not giving me a mask.

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  • luckymaverick
    Mustang- Pony time is quarantined as well. My trainer fits the high risk category, so no Pony snuggles or training until further notice. I'm watching every video and reading every article I can find in lieu of actually training Pony. Plus, trying to train the dogs in lateral cues to see what works

    Work is stressful, as some patients understand the new reality and most don't. Everyone misses their families and we're all trying to brighten their days as best we can.Where Granddad is falls under the quarantine, so we've not been able to see him for several weeks. We so appreciate the care staff and nursing staff, as Grandma can call the desk whenever and check on him that way.

    The PPE/mask struggle is real. No one has enough, and even with homemade ones, you have to wear them usually a week at a time. At least the homemade ones are washable

    I am thankful to be PRN right now- one of my places is making their FT staff use PTO or unpaid leave if they get Covid or have to care for a family member or child. Even Starbucks and Kroger are adding hazard pay and paid emergency leave.

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  • MustangTwist
    PF - Glad it was just an abscess for Surge! Hopefully he'll be feeling better in no time. How's Chico doing?

    Lucky - How's work been? Are you able to visit pony at all?

    Sugar - I totally know what you mean re: structuring rides. What exercises have you been doing? Always looking for some new stuff to do with my guy to make him snappier off the aids...

    Rider - Ugh, I'm fighting the temptation to shop! I'm grateful to still have a job amidst this crisis (actually, we're busier than usual dealing with all the legal complexities presented by coronavirus) but my husband is an architect and his work has been significantly impacted. We'll be alright for a few months, but I keep reminding myself now isn't the time to buy all those big ticket items I've been eyeing. That being said, I do want a new MIPS helmet and I feel like I can justify that expense. It's for safety! And it can also be pretty! Where are the best deals you're finding?

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  • luckymaverick
    PF- I'm glad things are looking up for you. I saw Vanessa's tribute to Ricky. I hate that for her.

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  • ParadoxFarm
    Well, Surge had an abscess, just like DH thought. So I guess that's good! We treated it, and he's wrapped for now. It's raining today, so they are all in, which is good for Surge. Sure would be nice to actually start his training. He's had one lunge session so far. I see other RRP trainers who are already doing great things. One trainer I follow online is already doing bridle-less riding. Sigh. Ah, well. We can only do what we can do, right?

    Had a nice ride on Tay yesterday. Love that horse.

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  • ParadoxFarm
    Cute pic, ridernc!

    Hey, those of you that know vanessajean here, she posted via IG that Ricky Bobby passed last night. I'm so sad for her. She loved that horse.

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