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Can we have an adult re-rider support group?

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  • Gymnastics are why I ride dressage. I like to keep all four hooves on the ground, thanks.
    Button: the leaning forward is a hold over from my hunter days many moons ago, when we all rode like that. (I'm talking 30 years ago.) It's so ingrained that if anything goes wrong, I lean. It's getting better with constant correction, but it still happens.
    Tiger Horse: go look at the other place...won't hurt, right? I also agree that if they put a hay surcharge on, that should mean that it covers whatever hay the horse requires. The last place I was at I had to supply grain, amongst other things, even though I was paying full board. Really did seem "nickle and diming" and I resented it. I moved back to my old barn and although it isn't as fancy, you know what you're paying for and that they are getting it.

    Your beliefs don't make you a better person, your behaviour does.


    • Originally posted by Button View Post

      Paradox - I know right!!! The funny thing is that my leg stays right at the girth, heels down, but my shoulders curl forward and my chest ends up hovering above the neck. Last month it was "if you don't close your fingers and keep them closed I'm going to tape them shut!" Now all I seem to hear is "Sit up! Sit up! Sit up! When you lean forward he's going to go faster! What do you think is going to happen if you do that on an OTTB like you want to get?" Although I think some of it has to do with weakness. I have to keep them framed up now and my back gets so tired.
      I started doing pilates awhile back and it is very helpful with core strength. I've learned that a sore back usually equals a disengaged core for me. Of course regardless of that my default position used to be to lean forward, which my trainer said is one of the most common things riders do. Finally I stopped it, but I will usually revert when I am nervous and she will say, "you're doing your turtle impression on me again. Lean back!"


      • Wow have I ever gotten behind! I’m sorry I’m going to skip the individual replies, but I’m reading and keeping tabs on everyone. Thanks for the awesome pics of the cute horses Soloud and Paradox! And I’m sorry to hear some show experiences weren’t all they were cracked up to be here lately, but just remember that the first couple of shows of the season are that way for a *lot* of people – it’s like the horses need to be reminded that they don’t die when they go visiting other places.

        So far no news on the sales front. I’ve had both Velvet and Rose posted on a website for a week or two now. They’re getting a fair amount of “hits” but nobody has contacted me yet. I don’t know a darn thing about selling a horse, so hopefully I worded stuff right. I guess I just have to wait it out.

        On Saturday I rode Gabriel w/t/c in the big outdoor arena and did some good sitting trot work. I have to work on it still – I want to collapse my upper body instead of sitting tall. But that’ll come with time and practice I guess. Then my friend rode Velvet w/t/c in the indoor and I hopped on for more w/t with her. I was surprised I even had the guts to get on her at all. Maybe I’m getting a little confidence back – albeit very shaky. I almost wanted to get on Rose, but I’m not quite there yet.

        ...I have been very upset recently by some very pushy and opinionated people who seem to have odd, selfish agendas that I am not privvy to. It’s such a shame that the horse community tends to be smallish around here, so I don’t know how exactly to separate myself from them and/or to quiet their opinions. One person thought it was a great idea to sell Velvet and get myself a confidence-builder, then a week later when I mentioned I had her posted for sale, changed her story completely and thinks it’s terrible for me to be “giving up on her” and selling her. Wtf??? Another person is telling everyone and their brother that my Gabriel is a “hateful, dangerous animal” – there is a long, drawn-out backstory, but the nutshell version is that I used to board my 3 there. She got too many animals and started having to do 3-4 hours of turnout per group instead of the 8-9 they originally had there. Gabriel is one of those horses that doesn’t do well without a lot of turnout. I requested more, but she wouldn’t do it. So, one day when she tried to bring them back in, Gabriel kept trying to herd the girls back out. I can imagine he may’ve been being kind of a pushy a-hole, ‘cause he can be when he’s upset, but he is NOT dangerous or hateful. She told me about it, I explained it’s because he’s not getting enough turn-out, and she dismissed it and still would not up their turn-out. Now that I’ve moved them, she’s telling everyone how horrible and dangerous he is. I don’t understand what the deal is, and it *really* hurts me to think she’s saying such things about my heart horse. Gah – some people!
        ~*~*~*~Founding member of the Spotted Saddlebred Pals Clique~*~*~*~

        The equine love of my life: Gabriel
        4/6/1993 - 8/23/2015 ...RIP my big, beautiful boy <3


        • twelvebelles, I totally agree with you about it being a strength and fitness thing. When I'm fit, I do much better. Right now I am not as fit, and I know I cannot get back into proper position as easily as I used to. Another reason to get serious about my fitness/diet. ACK. But I do need to work on my core. When I did have a few bad falls a few years back I pitched forward when my horse was crowhopping (not Chico, previous horse) and when I got forward, my brain said sit back but my body didn't listen! Then I lost a bunch of weight and got fit and did much better. And got Chico (knock on wood, I've never fallen off him). But then I broke my ankle and my fitness is gone again. Sigh.

          Classy, that sucks. People are just mean, and I know it's hard, but you kind of just have to ignore them. You can't change them, so just try to tune them out. People who KNOW you and KNOW your horses won't listen anyway. Good luck with your ads! If you want to contact me (PM) about your ad, I've had good luck selling and could look your ad over if you want. If not, that's okay, too! I wish you the best of luck. And glad to hear you're getting some confidence back. That's great!!! Takes a while, but who cares!
          “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
          ¯ Oscar Wilde


          • Classy--

            That's the horseworld. Two people, three opinions, depending on who they're giving them to.

            Someone at the barn inadvertently treated me like a child the other day and it really got to me. I bought a bridle for new horse that did not fit, and another boarder offered to loan me a spare of hers. She was standing in the doorway behind us and going in and out of the aisle, and new horse is a little bit bad about standing. So he was pulling towards the door she was moving in and out of trying to follow her. She rushed over to take the other bridle and the horse from me, and it's not like I don't know how to bridle a horse. Yes the reins for the second bridle were not over the neck, because the first set were and I didn't want to tangle them. Then she asked me if I wanted the second bridle's reins buckled, like I was a dumba** for undoing them (again, because they were tangled in the other bridle).

            I don't know why it bugged me so much, but it did. I'm not stupid. I've been riding for 15 years. I am rusty on some things because I haven't owned one in about 5 years. But it's coming back to me and I'm completely fine and I will ask for help when I need it, but I feel like everyone at this barn thinks I'm a total newbie.
            Originally posted by PeanutButterPony
            you can shackle your pony to a lawn chair at the show...so long as its in a conservative color.


            • Thanks for everyone's input! The hay thing really has me peeved - my guy is a hard keeper and I really like to have hay in front of him all the time - which is just an extra flake or two a day, not an unreasonable request, esp with the surcharge.

              The place I am considering is actually the barn where the schooling show will be held - so, I can check it out while I'm there (or if the show is cancelled, I'll just pop in).

              As for my trainer - well, she runs hot and cold, some days we are best friends, other days not so much. Figured out that she and her daughter are going to the show in June and they probably don't want to be bothered with having a "student" along to babysit. She is in a tough personal relationship, so I'm sure that wears on her as well. Still, I am a paying client and do expect a certain amount of common courtesy.

              Classy - sorry about the untrue rumors - what is it with "horse" people?!

              "I am still under the impression that there is nothing alive quite so beautiful as a thoroughbred horse." -- John Galsworthy


              • Thanks so much for the kind words, guys. What is it with “horse” people is right! I mean, there are a lot of great horse people out there (just take you guys for example), but there are plenty of crazies, too. And sometimes, I feel like the crazies have me surrounded, a la the Alpaca Death Squad!!!

                Paradox – Thank you so much. You have a PM.

                Soloud – What is it with people??? I mean, I’m sure the lady was just trying to be helpful or whatever, but seriously??? I completely understand what you’re describing, and to me, that in no way sounds like it was a dangerous situation that required her to jump in and “save the day.” Ugh – how entirely frustrating. …I guess at least you know they want to help, if that’s any comfort. But I understand how being treated like a child can feel very demeaning.

                Tiger – Yeah, hay is non-negotiable for me. The horses need it – especially a hard keeping horse. I can’t assume anything, and maybe the barn you’re at just has a poor financial management system that is causing them to start nickel-and-diming, but that isn’t fair to you as a full-care boarder. I would at least go have a look at the other barn and see what they have to offer. If you don’t know the other boarders there, try to speak with a few of them to be sure you’d fit in ok. Good luck!
                ~*~*~*~Founding member of the Spotted Saddlebred Pals Clique~*~*~*~

                The equine love of my life: Gabriel
                4/6/1993 - 8/23/2015 ...RIP my big, beautiful boy <3


                • Classy, try and ignore them. I know it's easier said than done, but you are doing what's right for them and for you so don't pay them any attention. I'll never understand how some people are wired, but then again, they may say the same thing about me.

                  I'm glad you had good rides on Gabriel and Velvet. It's amazing how much that helps

                  Soloud - I'm treated like that all the time. lol I'm a complete newb and sometimes I do get tired of hearing the same thing over and over and being treated like I don't know anything. I'll be the first to admit I don't know much, but I do know to get one saddled for pities sake! I hope this week goes much better for you.

                  Tiger - hope you like the barn. Hay is a necessity for a hard keeper, and you're paying for it.


                  • Rode Summer again. Day two and she's perfect. One of the easiest horses I've ridden recently which probably means she needs to be a kids horse. blah. I really wish I had a full time job!!!

                    Crabby Appy mare is getting a lot better. We did lots and lots of canter transitions and I did lots of no stirrup work at the trot. Whee fun times! She now walks up to me in the field with her ears pricked forward - total change in behavior, lol. She does for my trainer too, and we're the ones who ride her the most so not sure whats up with that.
                    "Choose to chance the rapids, and dare to dance the tides" - Garth Brooks
                    "With your permission, dear, I'll take my fences one at a time" - Maggie Smith, Downton Abbey


                    • Event4Life, see, Appy just needed a job! I always say there are crappy Appys and happy Appys. I'm lucky to have a happy Appy.
                      “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
                      ¯ Oscar Wilde


                      • Classy - I'm sorry you're having to put up with this nonsense.

                        soloud - That sucks, and would irritate me too. Sometimes people just overreact, but c'mon!

                        Event4Life - I think that means she likes you!

                        Thanks for the advice about the core strength, I was thinking along the same lines. I'm looking into classes at the school gym (I work on uni campus), hopefully they'll have something to help me get stronger. I think when it happens on the flat it's a weak core issue, coming off the fence it's defensive.


                        • Classy-- I also say just ignore them. I had a similar problem when I boarded at a wonderful show barn. My heart boy D was getting more and more difficult to ride. I at the time couldn't figure out why. He was very hot and getting hotter by the day. Everyone there was labeling him "dangerous". It came to a point where I wasn't allowed to ride him with beginners in the ring, or ponies, or really anyone except other same riding level boarders. I was starting to get afraid of him myself. I finally moved him to a back yard place and turned him out for a winter and took a brief break. Low and behold he just needed more turnout. So my moral of this story is- don't listen to anyone. You know how Gabriel is and that is all that matters!! Just go and enjoy your time with your fur kids and don't worry about the crummy people.

                          Today I took D out and put him on the longe line for something for him to do. He was so happy and sassy that I think I will bring him back into work but just fit enough to go on trail rides and have a little fun in the ring. Nothing to serious. * knock on wood* he was sound with no shoes and on a circle!!!!

                          Jack I think is a little body sore from his getting back into work. He has been back in training since the first of April and getting legged up since the begginingish of March. He just seems stiff. I might put him on Pentosan.

                          He was awesome on Sunday cross country!! He just jumped around like a pro. He will get moved up to Novice shortly. She ( my trainer) schooled him over some Training level jumps on Sunday and it didn't faze him.

                          Sorry I didn't reply to everyone!!!!


                          • Event4Life - I cannot for the life of me read Crabby Appy....it comes out all wrong but rhyming Mean but funny at the same time. LOL

                            Such good news from everyone! Classy - don't sweat the small stuff. Anyone who's done the horse thing will be smart enough to recognize sour grapes and see for themselves!


                            • Bumknees how are you doing? Did you manage to ride yet?


                              • Originally posted by Button View Post
                                Event4Life - I think that means she likes you!
                                haha we're not sure if she's decided she likes us or if there's an ulterior motive.....she's a smart one.

                                Paradox - Apparently she used to be friendly (in her previous home where she didn't do anything), but then she started "boot camp". Maybe she's finally associating work with attention which = good things :-D. Its a nice thought, lol!

                                Finzean - ahahahaha that thought did cross my mind too (hey, Paradox said it first!) but I figured I'd keep it G rated.
                                "Choose to chance the rapids, and dare to dance the tides" - Garth Brooks
                                "With your permission, dear, I'll take my fences one at a time" - Maggie Smith, Downton Abbey


                                • Well, I've been mulling it over in my head and I think for a lot of reasons that I am going to switch barns.

                                  This place is really close to my house, but some of the arcane rules (no hand grazing, no walking on the grass) and the fact that everyone rides in the indoor because the outdoor is on top of this huge blustery hill that terrifies all the horses, on top of the fact that there's no resident trainer so I can't get help with this young horse when I need it, adds up to me needing to find someplace else.

                                  It is close to my house (10-15 minutes) whereas the next place I'd accept is more like 40 minutes, but I need the ability to have someone else who's done this before get on the horse, I think. So, made those calls today. I'm not thrilled about it because it means more $$ for me (board is the same, but more gas to drive there and back, and more $$ in training and lessons) but it's the best way to accomplish what I need to accomplish, I think.
                                  Originally posted by PeanutButterPony
                                  you can shackle your pony to a lawn chair at the show...so long as its in a conservative color.


                                  • Ys
                                    Originally posted by HazelG View Post
                                    Bumknees how are you doing? Did you manage to ride yet?
                                    Not yet. sighs.. The car finally got fixed, but the weather had been lousy. And I've had 3 Drs appointments this week uugg. Two of which were in Cleveland on two different days and they seemed to last forever. And about 13 viles of blood. I hate this.
                                    Well next week is suppose to be beautiful so knock on all sorts of wood that next week weather will be a predicted.
                                    Gods I can't wait.
                                    Friend of bar .ka


                                    • soloud - sounds like the right decision - good luck!

                                      bumknees - "knocking on wood" and keeping my fingers crossed for you!

                                      Can't wait to look at this new barn - last night (and most Thursdays) are just a waste as far as riding goes. There is a first time horse owner, a beginner rider who bought her first horse (an OTTB) about 6 mos ago - she lessons on Thurs, I try to work around her lesson time. As in, be done before she starts or wait until she's finished. Never seems to work out because the "start" time fluctuates. Anyway, she basically has little to no control and it's scary. I would have gone down to the outdoor - but, there are no lights down there - power was cut last spring and still not fixed . . .

                                      I wait out her lesson and then another boarder comes in with her boyfriend, who
                                      is also a beginner and can't steer. Riding with him is like playing dodge ball! So, I've been mounted about 40 min and have gotten nothing accomplished. (Not exactly true, we did get some walk work done, but still . . . very frustrating.)

                                      Then I find out that my trainer is also going to show at this little show on the
                                      5th. GREAT - I know the drill here - she will be so worried about her stuff, we won't get much coaching at the show. If I'd known that, I wouldn't have bothered to enter.

                                      Sorry, venting again . . . I think I'm just so done with this barn.

                                      "I am still under the impression that there is nothing alive quite so beautiful as a thoroughbred horse." -- John Galsworthy


                                      • Tiger Horse - so sorry about the frustration. So regimes I forget how nice it is to have the critters at home. Go visit he other farm now.


                                        • Wow...a lot going on here: new barns (maybe), difficult fellow boarders, shows coming up, lousy weather, and some people actually riding.

                                          Sky's been really good lately, jumping small (2'6") courses with more confidence. I just have to relate what has been going on lately with a new mare who's been boarded at our barn for about a month. This mare has fixated on Sky to the point where she stands at the fence line and hollers from the moment I begin my ride and continues through my cooling her out, feeding her, and getting her ready to put back outside (a process of a couple of hours). This mare gets really semi-hysterical, racing around in addition to hollering, when she can't actually see Sky, for example when Sky is in her stall eating her dinner. This goes on despite the fact that the new mare is never in the pasture alone; there are plenty of other mares out there for her to pal around with. Sky herself has been very nonchalant about the whole thing.

                                          This has been only a minor annoyance, but yesterday after my lesson, I wanted to take Sky out and do a little loop around the farm as I sometimes do in preparation for someday going on an actual trail ride. However, Miss New Mare began racing along the fence line, calling, and she ended up upsetting the horse of the girl I was riding with, so we had to turn back. Oh, well. I wonder how she will react to my eventually taking Sky to an away show. I may come back to the farm to find her dead in the pasture of a heart attack.
                                          I heard a neigh. Oh, such a brisk and melodious neigh as that was! My very heart leaped with delight at the sound. --Nathaniel Hawthorne