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Can we have an adult re-rider support group?

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  • Wow, I'm SO behind! Lots of catching up to do...

    Event4Life – That’s wonderful that you found such a great horse to re-learn on!!! I love the ones that are kind and forgiving, but make you ride if you want them to go correctly. I feel like they are the best to learn on! Not exactly the same thing, but I know of a positively drool-worthy Quarter Horse/Shire cross that is used for Fox Hunting. He’s bigger than your guy (he took after the Shire there – he’s 17+ hands), but literally floats over the ground when ridden correctly and between the aids. So, I’m sure your half-lease guy is positively beautiful. Congratulations on finding him!

    Pony4me – Mr. All Better is one lucky duck to have such a knowledgeable team working together to make him, and keep him, Mr. All Better. That’s wonderful! Good for you for having the specialist out, even though I’m sure your wallet is crying because of it. I also feel it was very smart of you to have the trainers deal with the “happy bucks and feel-good shenanigans.” Hahaha! It’s all good – that’s what you’re paying them for, right?

    Ivy62 – Gotta love when horses decide to injure themselves. I had a good friend whose draft cross decided one day to rip her hind leg open. I’m not sure how many stitches went into putting her back together, but it was not pretty! And about a year and a half ago, my gelding nearly scalped himself when he knocked his head. Awesome. But, they heal. No worries. As far as tricks to relax, not sure I have many. I’ve dealt with confidence/fear issues ever since I started re-riding; especially with cantering. ParadoxFarm gave you good advice. Also, a good instructor who knew when to push me and when to let me be was part of what helped me. Other than that, when I’ve been riding on my own, if I feel nice and secure in the saddle and am having a good day, I decide to canter and just do it before I can think about it. That way, I can’t let the fear in too much. And before I can be afraid, I’m doing it.

    Dewey – I am constantly drooling over saddles, and I just can’t afford to get a new one. I don’t even need a new one. I just look at them and I’m like, “Man, I wish I could get that! It’s beautiful! I bet it would look so good on [whichever horse] and it looks SO comfortable….” I torture myself with it sometimes. Lol

    QuietAnn – Congrats on Feronia! I’m so happy she’s sound and getting some pep in her step again. Hooray!!!

    PaintedHunter – That is the *best* when you have a horse who you’re able to bond with so easily. It’s sort of kismet. I know what you mean about being able to gel better with some horses than others. And I sometimes get all sappy and teary-eyed when I think about how lucky I am to have each my three, ‘cause they’re all special to me in their own ways. I totally get it.

    Iechris – Oh my goodness, that can be a scary situation. You absolutely did the right thing by getting off once you got her to stand. Safety first. Best to get off and walk her than to get left behind while she bolts on home to the barn. I’m so glad it turned out ok and she calmed back down once she got to her jump field.

    Sdhaurmsmom – Congratulations on reaching both of your goals (falling off during warm-up doesn’t count)! And you placed REALLY well – that’s wonderful! Kudos to you and your lovely tb.

    Pancakes – I’m glad to hear that feeling loose in the saddle is something others have experienced from time-to-time and that it doesn’t necessarily mean I’m getting weak or “losing it.” I may just take my gelding for a spin or two without stirrups in the near future (soundness and weather permitting) just because it sounds like a good idea. Great thought! …I’m SO glad your aunt is doing well!!! I have been very worried about her and your family. Thank goodness for small miracles. …The potential horse sounds awesome! This is the 6 year old you mentioned before? I would caution that you don’t want to take on more than you feel comfortable with (because you mentioned that some of his mannerisms made you nervous). But, personally, if I were in your shoes I would do the trial with this guy (keeping in the forefront of my mind that I need to be objective about him and his potential as a partner for me) while still looking at others and keeping my options open. But ultimately, do whatever you feel comfortable with.

    TarheelJD – My heart goes out to your trainer and everyone who is at your barn. Losing an old friend is SO difficult. I didn’t even know the horse and it makes me sad.

    Bumknees – I don’t blame you for not going riding. The helmet is super important in my eyes, but you also don’t want to mess around with lake effect snow. I know ALL about that stuff. I prefer not to drive in snow if at all possible. The only bad car accident I ever had happened because there was barely a dusting of snow on the road, just enough to make it REALLY slippery. I’ve been overly cautious about driving in any amount of snow ever since. Just stay inside and have a hot cocoa instead.
    ~*~*~*~Founding member of the Spotted Saddlebred Pals Clique~*~*~*~

    The equine love of my life: Gabriel
    4/6/1993 - 8/23/2015 ...RIP my big, beautiful boy <3


    • Hi, all. First off I want to wish you all a very happy Thanksgiving. May it be all that you wish for. My husband and I are just hanging out at home. Maybe we will go out to eat since I cannot cook due to the cast/crutches. Update on the ankle: Well, when I thought I would be in the hard cast for three weeks and then get the walking boot, I had misunderstood. I had my three-week appointment yesterday and I got the cast off. Only to have the same type put back on. i need the hard cast 9 to 12 weeks. i was so disappointed! This was the longest three weeks of my life. Sigh. Guess I will just let Chico stay fuzzy and take the winter off. I'm going to try to not feel so down, but it has been a challenge.
      “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
      ¯ Oscar Wilde


      • Hello Everyone --

        I want to wish everyone a Happy Thanksgiving.

        Leo is stabled at dressage barn about 50 minutes away. He's been there a few months and I thought I could make it work, but it's just too far between time and gas. It's a beautiful facility with grass turnout, which is rare in southern Arizona.

        Around of the first of the month, I'll bring him back up to Tucson to where his owner has her other horses boarded.

        I'm on the hunt for a wool-flocked close-contact saddle since my Tad Coffin just isn't working well for us.
        You hate that, don’t you? Do you like oysters? You have to acquire a taste for oysters and the deep distance.”
        -- George H. Morris on learning to love the deep distance


        • Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!! I really wanted to follow this thread but there is just so much activity!! I feel like I do when I'm reading a book and leaving too much time between two chapters.... I get all the characters confused and have to read it all over again
          The one thing I know is that everybody here sounds very friendly, smart and respectful... so among other things, I'm thankful for that today! OP, that was one bright idea you got!

          I haven't been riding as much as I'd like... call me lazy (and you wouldn't be too far from the truth). I find excuses, some aren't so bad: the whole single motherhood thing, and not having time to ride because I really need to focus on my job search. I do make sure that my horse gets ridden at least 3 times a week though, a horseless friend and her daughter are happy to ride him so that works out well. And my old guy is so cool now, I don't worry so much anymore about letting other people ride him.

          I'm digressing.... HAPPY THANKSGIVING everyone!!



          • Happy Thanksgiving to all! May your day be filled with family/friends and ponies!

            I have not ridding in about two weeks, so tomorrow should be interesting. The barn did a dressage show last weekend and I scribed for the whole day, in the cold and a direct wind. Who would have thunk that would wear you out so much (it was my first time scribing)? On Sunday, we were all zombies and the thought of attempting to haul my tired butt up on the TB was just too much, especially after four us cleaned the barn.
            And nothing bad happened!


            • I just stumbled upon this thread after having taken a hiatus from the Forum b/c of taking a hiatus from the horses. Now getting back into this crazy horse-life and loving it but, like others posting here, have the ups and downs (and I don't mean just posting!! haha)

              Never will I walk off from the horses, again. Despite the difficulties in getting back in the saddle (somedays literally!), this whole thing is good for my soul!

              Heading out for a little Thanksgiving Day ride in a few minutes...


              • Welcome back, Finzean. . Hard to stay away from horses too long!

                Miloute55, just jump right in. Ignore the previous 118 pages and you'll be fine.
                “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
                ¯ Oscar Wilde


                • You guys are an inspiration! I wish I boarded with you! The young kids at my barn just do not get it. I have a nice horse and great lessons and I am happy.. So what if I do not jump 5 foot fences!!!!
                  Happy thanksgiving everyone
                  Mai Tai aka Tyler RIP March 1994-December 2011
                  Grief is the price we pay for love- Gretchen Jackson
                  "And here she comes. Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it's ZENYATTA!"


                  • Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving.

                    For us (my barn) it was a day of tears and memories. We lost one of the best ponies in the world to colic. Mojo was barely 15h in reality, and a qh, in his mind, he was all of 17h, a TB who ran like the wind and jumped the moon. For years, he was The Boss of the gelding pasture. Before I ever knew him, he was a champion pony jumper. And, in his case, pony was often a four letter word. Nobody knows exactly how old he was.

                    By the time I met him, he was giving lessons to up and coming riders. If you rode him correctly, he was wonderful. Don't and he would rat you out in a heart beat. He knew HIS job, but expected you to do yours.

                    When I started riding him, we had our issues. Because I would be tense, he would give me the horrid trot, the one where there is absolutely no extension and it goes 90 mph. Took me a while to figure that out. Don't dare look at a jump, he would run out in a heartbeat. I did that once, just practice riding, just a little box, and "we" dodged it neatly. My trainer, who was riding at the same time, asked, "So, did it move?" LOL - Me: Why yes, but only as we flew by it. I learned not to look down.

                    The day came when I showed Mojo in x-rails - my first over fences show, w/t. My trainer and I discussed where to pick up the trot in the courtesy circle. The patterns were easy - 8 fences, outside all, no diagonals, so twice around. So, in we go, walking easily, Apparently, Mojo was not listening when the discussion of where to pick up the trot was had, because he decided and off we went. I talked the entire time, just to keep breathing. And we did it, and placed 7th out of 21 riders.

                    For the flat, there were twenty rides, split into two groups of ten. We were in the 2nd group. First group goes and 4 horses get pulled out of that group. We go in to do our flat, when asked to trot, omg there was a trot I had never ridden on the pony before. It was his show trot - and yes he knew he was showing - it flowed. We made the cut for that group! So, we go again. Bless the smart ponies - by then he knew: I have jumped, I have flatted. I am done! So, the show trot was not as evident - LOL. But, we still placed 7th out of 20.

                    He was not perfect by any means. Since I feed on weekends, there was the day I got to the barn and noticed Mojo's stall gate was open, but he was in his stall. Good boy! Until I got to the feed room - guess who had been there and then put himself back in his stall!!!!

                    He bowed a tendon earlier this year, so was in retirement.

                    RIP old man. Give em hell over the bridge!!!!
                    And nothing bad happened!


                    • Sorry for the loss, Jaslyn. Sounds like such a character. You will have lots of fond memories.
                      “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
                      ¯ Oscar Wilde


                      • So sorry to hear about Mojo, Jaslyn. It's hard when they leave us, especially when they do so under such circumstances. And Paradox, sorry about the extra cast time. Major bummer and totally unexpected.

                        Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving. It was nice and quiet at our house. I took DH to the barn in the late morning to help me turn out my horse, and took him out again a few hours later so I could bring him in and ride him. The entire barn staff was off today, except for feeding, since it was a holiday.

                        Rode the horse, and he was great. We were just going to do w/t since he is just starting to canter, but he was so quiet and willing that I did ask him to canter both ways. He was a perfect gentleman. No bucks, spooks or surprises! It's nice to see some light at the end of the tunnel.

                        After yesterday's 70 degree temps, and sunshine, we have rain and cold today. Perfect day to ignore the Black Friday bull$shit, and just relax.
                        It's 2018. Do you know where your old horse is?

                        www.streamhorsetv.com -- website with horse show livestream listings and links.


                        • Thanks, pony4me. It is frustrating. And yesterday was so beautiful! (I live in m'boro, so I think close to you). And today is ugly. Not that I've been getting out much.

                          DH surprised me with turkey, mashed potatoes, green beans, and for dessert apple pie and ice cream. Mmm. He did well! . I wasn't thinking we were going to have TG this year. Nice surprise.
                          “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
                          ¯ Oscar Wilde


                          • jaslyn1701 - I can tell you the story of my life based on the horses & ponies that were in it at the time. They have the power to define certain seasons of our lives because of our relationships with them. Morbid as it may seem, sometimes I just go sit out in the farthest of our pastures where my horses and dogs are all buried and just sit with the memories. A bittersweet day to see Mojo gone but old age & all its maladies will no longer beat up on him.


                            • I am happy to report that I actually rode my horse today - for the first time in two weeks. Despite the fates attempting to make me chicken out: split zipper on one boot, horse with one eye squinched shut. I thought about asking my trainer about the eye and riding, but I knew what she would say. So, I tacked up and went.

                              He was pretty much the gentleman! A little get up and go, but listened when I said slow or no.

                              Then we went to ride in the jump field with all the others. Gulp. For those of you who do not know me, I like my enclosures, as in riding arenas with fences. It provides a limited amount of territory for bad things to happen. So, leaving my comfort zone and heading out into the "open" was huge for me. First thing I noticed was we had our big boy walk going on. Again, he was alert but listening. So, I picked up a trot, the big boy ground covering trot. There is a space in the field where you can ride a circle with "barriers", i.e., jumps. We started out in the circle, but ended up going all the way around the outside!!! And nothing bad happened........

                              Such a good boy! LOL - I have spoiled him well. He knows that after we ride, he gets turned out to graze. When it's time to put him back in the pasture, we go by my trunk and he gets his cookies, then out. Today, I had left his cookies on top of my trunk. One of my barn mates hollered at me - Finn is done. I turn around, he is at the trunk, just finishing his cookies and looking for me to take him out.

                              Thank you for the comments about Mojo. Finzean, you are so right. Once the pain of loss subsides, they all occupy a special place in our hearts. And, yes, this is much more preferable than watching him go by inches and my poor trainer having to keep asking, "Is today the day?" based on his quality of life.
                              And nothing bad happened!


                              • Jaslyn, sounds like a great ride, your horse sounds like a character, in a good way. Glad you got to ride. (Any pics posted on here anywhere?)
                                “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
                                ¯ Oscar Wilde


                                • Paradox - that's Finn in my profie pic.

                                  Rode in the field again today, I may be totally crippled tomorrow. First of all, in the ring, we have a really nice really tall mounting block. It really helps for those of who are less limber than we used to be and ride 16.2h horses. In the jump field, there is just a normal size one. So, I line Finn up, go to put my left foot in the stirrup and realize there is going to be quite a reach. Ok, says, I - Finn, please stand like a statute while your mother does her impression of a monkey climbing a tree. I manage to get mounted, Finn The Wonder Horse stands still!

                                  Day two of the big boy gaits my just have crippled me. However, the big boy trot is so much easier to ride than the little dinky one.

                                  There were even thoughts of picking up the canter while we were riding around, we had the nice trot going, all it would have taken was one little squeeze and the word...... But I didn't - another day. Was talking to my trainer afterwards and made sure to thank her for the rides she put in on Finn. He seems much more confident, which helps me be more confident. Or maybe I am a bit more confident and his little antics don't bother me so much any more. Either way, we are starting to feel a connection when I ride - which is really really nice. I pay much more attention to him than I do to myself - which probably helps as well. And, as I told her, I learned not to pull - just little tweaks on the reins when I need something. Hard lesson to learn - to the OTTB, pull means go. Tweaks mean listen.

                                  One of those somebody should have had a camera moments: After I got off, was sitting on the mounting block watching the others finish riding. Finn was standing right next to me, on the right side. He put his head behind me, rested his nose on my left shoulder and just breathed on my neck. What a boy!

                                  And yes, in the midst of my naproxin induced stupor, I am still grinning.
                                  And nothing bad happened!


                                  • Way to go Jaslyn. It sounds like a great day. I LOVE that nose on the neck thing!


                                    • Jaslyn, your past 2 posts are awesome, Finn sounds like quite the character :-D. Its such a nice feeling when you conquer fears like riding in open spaces!

                                      I had my first lesson on my lease horse, Duke. It was also my 2nd time jumping him (I've decided with his owner to only jump him in lessons until further notice). Its so awesome to have lessons on a horse you're riding regularly - I can already see improvement compared to the day I tried him, though we have a long way to go and lots of "homework," mainly revolving around getting him to go STRAIGHT and work over his top line.

                                      Our goal is to attend a jumper show series in April (only the 2'6), so I guess I should change my username because I'm apparently heading over to H/J land for now :-D.. I am excited about this endeavor and my parents are pleased I am no longer jumping solid fences! They also decided show jumping is very exciting after watching the Brits win the Olympics....hopefully they'll find tiny fences equally exciting, haha.
                                      "Choose to chance the rapids, and dare to dance the tides" - Garth Brooks
                                      "With your permission, dear, I'll take my fences one at a time" - Maggie Smith, Downton Abbey


                                      • Well I also finally rode my young guy and realized the ring was not ridable. Atleast I tried and tacked up and walked him around, this is going to be a long winter...

                                        DD rode the older, trail only guy and was attacked by two dogs. I posted in off course, so scary, we have many loose dogs and coyotes and bobcats and have never had a problem. Apparently the dogs came up and DD and our horse thought OK hello, and then the dogs began growling, snareling and biting ! He ran off they chased him and then started growling and snareling again....So scary if it was the baby TB I would have been toast.....not a confidence booster today.

                                        Winter is so tough...


                                        • Jaslyn and Tarheel- so sorry for your barn losses That's so terrible and heart-breaking. But Jaslyn- congrats on your "big-boy" rides! That's so wonderful.

                                          Trainer told me a funny Ollie anecdote. I just got him a fence-feeder so he wouldn't have to eat off the ground (he lives outside and is fed in his pasture). I thought I was being a good mom- well, it turns out he likes his bucket for more than just eating. Apparently, after he's done, he takes the feeder off the fence and runs away with it, tossing it and picking it back up and repeating. I can't imagine that it's fun to go try to find the thing after he's done playing with it, so I'm not sure this feeder use is going to last....but how funny that he plays with it He also has apparently taken to scooting the metal hay bale ring around the field when it's empty, LOL! I think I need to get him some toys.
                                          Blog chronicling our new eventing adventures: Riding With Scissors