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Can we have an adult re-rider support group?

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  • I read all the posts on the anxiety with interest. I think it was the previous round of anxiety posts which prompted me to buy my safety vest! May those of you suffering from anxiety be able to conquer it and enjoy your horses!

    Pancakes, I hope you're doing OK! Let us know!
    I heard a neigh. Oh, such a brisk and melodious neigh as that was! My very heart leaped with delight at the sound. --Nathaniel Hawthorne


    • Just thought I would report on the show yesterday, our last of the season. Sky was a very good girl, although we had a few issues. In her 2' schooling division, she had a very good warm-up trip, and then her first trip was just super--she won the class over 7 or 8 others. She was so relaxed. Then in the final trip, after the first line, she landed on her left lead (almost never happens), and I got a bit discombobulated when I asked for the change. I think I leaned in. Anyway, she changed only in front, and when I kicked her to complete the change, she bucked and then knocked the next fence down. So that was a mess. Then in the under saddle, we ran into traffic problems during the second canter. I had to steer clear, and she decided to swap leads. Then it took me two tries to put her right. So that was a mess, too. So of the three classes in the division, she had one blue and two did-not-places. It's all learning, right?

      In adult eq on the flat, she was very good. I placed 2nd, very good for me. Then they needed another adult rider over fences for the class to make. Sky is not ready for that, so I was asked to climb on the little QH I posted about earlier (the one I trained who is now being leased by someone else). I was happy to do it although I hadn't ridden him in a year. I threw my saddle on him, learned the course in two minutes, and jumped him around while they were holding up Pleasure Horse for me in the second ring. I had a blast! Then I threw my saddle back on Sky, whipped off the safety vest, and trotted over to the other ring. She was such a good girl, she went around on a nice loose rein. I couldn't have been happier. She placed second in that, so our day ended on a good note.

      Here are some pics, all taken by DH. The jumping one is from adult eq, where I am riding the little QH. The others are of Sky on the flat, with several of her in Pleasure Horse on a loose rein.






      I heard a neigh. Oh, such a brisk and melodious neigh as that was! My very heart leaped with delight at the sound. --Nathaniel Hawthorne


      • Sorry its been a while..
        Pancakes sorry about your horse...I feel it will work out in end and another horse will come your way and be what you need.

        I sit here and wonder what tomorrow will bring. Because of the election I have not slept since well not past 2am. I am having for want of a better word " flash backs" to another electon one where the winner vowed he wuold cut the military in half and he did.
        Though obama didnt say this he has already cut spending and through automatic speandng cuts which redces forces my fears are real. It is cheaper to "pay" for 2 or 3 E-1's than 1 E-6 who isclose to an E-7... same it was 19yrs ago when the Navy computers spit out my Dh's number as an E-5.. cheaper to pay E-1's to do same job.. 6mths from now will dh have a job? Grated its only part time with the Guard... But ....
        The thing is his job with the Guard isnt something many want to do. And isnt something one learns over night...And if he gets "called up" or his unit gets activated for their job.. we may as well bend over and kiss out collective buttocks goodbye... But he is of the prime rank that frist gets cut unless he can prove he is worth his pay(which they want to cut in half). starting the first of the year if it goes through.After the enarurgatin(sp)..Of course he isnt allowed to offically(but to me he is) say anything about it..(remember he has no constional(sp) rights as long as he carries a military id).
        And t top it off. sould he be RIFFED( Reduction In Forces Froced out is what is what we call it what it really stand for i dont know) agian we wil be in violation of the health care law and get taxed.. which we can not afford.. So thanks so much.. you have no idea what you did..

        Sorry for that it is something I just had to get off my chest.. was not aimed at anyone..

        I read your column with some interst. While my anexity did not come from the many falls I had as a Jr. they were just part of riding. They did not even come from falls I had as an amature with helmets(I still pefer the hunt caps of old dont ask me why) I hav not have any yet.. knock on wood.
        They have olny come in the last 5 or 6 mts when I have death again and beat it. But I am scared to get on even a pony right now though I have one avalable to me at any time. He is just a titch over a SM pony but nt quite Med.. But it is me I am afrade my balance is still off.
        So that is my thing I have to get over to get back on the horses and do what I do best..
        Friend of bar .ka


        • Dewey congratulations on a great show. The pictures are beautiful, both you and both the horses look great. What a terrific way to end the show season. I bet you're looking forward to next year now!

          Bumknees I'm sorry you're worried about all that. I have to say I'm not too up on Canadian politics, never mind American, but I hope it all works out ok for you and your DH.


          • Jody I read your column. My son had a bad fall from his horse last summer. The pediatrician ordered an urgent CAT scan suspecting a skull fracture and a bleed into his brain. He was wearing a Charles Owen. There was no fracture. There was no bleed. I threw that helmet in the trash and went out and bought another one for him. That helmet saved my son. I wrote the Charles Owen people and thanked them from the bottom of my heart. My daughter rides in one too. I also don't care what they cost. The CO people were so very nice. Apparently if you do have a crash, if you send the helmet to them they will give you a discount on a replacement. It was too late for me because I had already thrown out the old one but I don't care. My children will continue to ride in them. Disclaimer I have no affiliation with this company, just a relieved and grateful Mom.


            • Drum roll please! After fourteen months, I had my first totally normal ride on my TB today! Sound and even trotting both directions all the way around the ring. No stopping for corners, no head bobbing, no hesitation. Just a nice steady ride. We are all very relieved that the ordeal is just about over (IF he doesn't do anything stupid when he gets to canter starting Wednesday.) Please keep your fingers crossed.
              It's 2018. Do you know where your old horse is?

              www.streamhorsetv.com -- website with horse show livestream listings and links.


              • Yay, pony4me! I can't imagine how good that felt after all you have been through during the long rehab process.
                Riding a horse is not a gentle hobby, to be picked up and laid down like a game of solitaire. It is a grand passion.... ~ Emerson


                • Tarheel- Tajar is beautiful! What lovely coloring.

                  Pancakes, it sounds like you have totally reasonable expectations, and I actually saw a horse here in georgia that might be suitable for you recently... let me see if I can find the ad. Hang in there.

                  I can totally relate about the fear as well.... I actually was so scared after my former gelding ruined my confidence that I almost sent Ollie back when he was on trial because of my continuing nerve issues, and he has a HUGE stride that was freaking me out. SO glad I didn't send him back, as he truly is a saint of a horse who is so forgiving. I eventually just forced myself to fake it until I made it. I kept telling myself, "This will never get better until you actually do it." It's so hard to overcome those mental blocks. But once you get over it- it's so worth it to force yourself through the uncomfortable moments, if you know that it's 100% in your head and not a real ability issue. I've gone from trotting crossrails to occasionally jumping three feet now in the span of five months.

                  Yay pony4me and YAY, Dewey!! How fantastic, and you two look GREAT.

                  I had a show this weekend too- last of the year. And Saturday morning was Trouble with a capital T. I got on Ollie to school a few jumps at about 6:45 before everyone got going, so I could see how he was before our 8 a.m. class to see if I needed to wake him up, warm him up extensively, etc. Well my saintly cool as a cucumber horse turned into a fire-breather and started crow-hopping after/between jumps, shaking his head and being generally stupid. So I decided it was the cold weather and took him off to lunge him a bit to get some of the stupid out.

                  WELL. I put him on the lunge in the lunging ring, and as soon as I asked him to go, he flipped his head and neck and tore off, burning my hand with the lunge line. I had NO chance of holding onto the beast. Someone hadn't closed the gate, so he tore off through the gate and started running down the rows of stalls. He stopped on his own, and I calmly walked him to my trainer, who said GIVE HIM TO ME. So she took him to lunge him, and he pulled the same damn stunt AGAIN as someone was trying to come into the ring and almost knocked someone over. We then took him to the round pen and free lunged him for 10 minutes or so...after a few minutes, he stopped and looked at us like, "Sorry, I lost my brain, but I found it- can I stop now?" So he was a hot sweaty mess, I was a ball of nerves, and we decided to scratch my first three classes - the division I was champion in last time

                  So in my afternoon classes, in my move-up division I just started two shows ago, we got a 3rd and a 5th over fences out of 10, and a 5th in the flat. I was SO proud of those over-fences ribbons, as he did not even once try to barrel towards the gate or refuse to turn coming off the inside lines, which have been our biggest issues for months. SUCH an improvement! I was very happy to have my normal horse back. Still don't know what got into him, but that mood left him as quickly as it came.

                  We saw some little girls from his previous barn, though, and they said that he actually was given a tube of Perfect Prep every show before I got him, he often was stupid on show days, and he would often pull stunts even at home to try to mess you up in the ring. This actually made me feel pretty good, as from what I could gather, he's actually better behaved for me then he was at his old barn
                  Blog chronicling our new eventing adventures: Riding With Scissors


                  • PaintedHunter, sounds like a success! In a round-about way. Maybe he was telling you he was ready for the more challenging classes! Good job.

                    pony4me, I can imagine you're so happy! Keep us posted.

                    Dewey, you look like you make a great team with your horse. Lovely. I love the QH as well. Very nice.

                    Countdown: 8 days till cast comes off!
                    “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
                    ¯ Oscar Wilde


                    • Wow PaintedHunter -- you had quite a morning at the show! Congrats on your afternoon classes. What show did ya'll do?

                      I would be very proud of the fact that you have done so well with Ollie without the "Perfect Prep!"
                      Riding a horse is not a gentle hobby, to be picked up and laid down like a game of solitaire. It is a grand passion.... ~ Emerson


                      • Thanks! We did just a schooling show- Rolling Hills. My barn doesn't tend to go to rated shows, as most of us are working adults without the rated-show funds! Not that we're ready for bigger shows, anyway. Maybe one day. We're actually looking at changing up some shows next year- any recs for local shows in the area, up to a 2-ish hour drive or so?
                        Blog chronicling our new eventing adventures: Riding With Scissors


                        • Dachelle – I feel your pain! When I started riding again about 7 or 8 years ago, I had a number of times where I got frustrated to the point of tears; sometimes because I didn’t have the skills to get my bull-headed mount to do what I wanted, other times because I got frightened. Fear is something that we *all* deal with – some more than others. I still have fear issues. I, in particular, have a fear of cantering. And I’ve never even fallen off at the canter. It’s just the thought of what *might happen* if I did, and how I *might* hurt myself. It’s totally my own fault.

                          I still deal with the fear stuff, so I don’t have many words of wisdom for you. All I can say is that I try to face it and conquer it every chance I can. But, sometimes if I’m *really* feeling fragile (mentally), I just let it go for that day, because those are the times when it’s better to have a good experience and get my confidence back. Know what I mean? Anyway, best of luck to you. I know how you feel!

                          ParadoxFarm – I apologize that I came to this thread late and don’t know what happened, but either way, I’m sorry you’re not able to ride right now! I know the feeling! Not the same situation, but I had to have some major surgery a year ago in October. I was basically out-of-commission for a month! And then I had to go back to things *very* slowly. It is *very* difficult to be dependent on others, but it sounds like you have a wonderful support system in your hubby. I think he’s a keeper. And how fun to watch him take a lesson! Hehe!

                          Jaslyn – Haha! I love your new mantra – I may make it mine, as well, because I’ve done *exactly* what you mentioned more than once (stayed on just fine, but got freaked out and had an emotional meltdown when it was over. Then, days later I realize, “Wait – I did good! And nothing bad happened!).

                          Dewey – Aaawww – yay!!! I’m so glad you and Sky had a pretty good show! You look amazing on both those horses, and they are both darling mounts! And don’t be too tough on yourself about the two classes where you did not place – they just give you a little something to work on. Hey, at least you can get Sky to swap leads – I haven’t properly learned to do it at all yet! The only way it happens is if my horse offers it on his/her own. That’s one of the first things I’m going to ask my trainer to teach me when I start lessons again…

                          Pony4Me – Congratulations!!! I will indeed cross my fingers for you.

                          PaintedHunter – Wow! Congrats on those ribbons, and kudos to you for showing in the afternoon! I know my own chicken-self would probably have just scratched it for the whole day, but I bet it felt great to get those ribbons since you got on him and rode despite the nerves. Good for you!

                          ...As for me, I'm kind of depressed because I didn't get to see my horses *at all* this past weekend. So, it's been about a week and a half since I've seen them. I hate it when I don't get my horse time. And there's a possibility that I won't get to see them this coming weekend, either! How in the world am I going to maintain my sanity when I don't get to talk to my "barn therapists," hmmmm?
                          ~*~*~*~Founding member of the Spotted Saddlebred Pals Clique~*~*~*~

                          The equine love of my life: Gabriel
                          4/6/1993 - 8/23/2015 ...RIP my big, beautiful boy <3


                          • Re-rider checking-in, really itching to get back into riding. I'm planning to move at some point next year to be closer to the office. Have a dilemma - start riding in my hometown now or wait until next year until I move? I'm only moving 30 mins away, but far enough that I couldn't continue to ride at the same barn. I need to save up enough for the mortgage and other expenses, and I have no clue as to when that's going to happen.

                            Would appreciate any feedback! I can hear those horses calling my name...:P


                            • Welcome, Accio!

                              I completely understand your dilemma, as I'm in a somewhat similar situation myself! Ultimately, I think you'll just have to determine what the best move is for you, because I feel like it's a personal judgement call...

                              I have my 3 horses in a stable where I *know* they are very well taken care of. Unfortunately, the stable is 2 hours from home. Work is a little close to the stable, but it's still about 1.5 hours. And I have a SS (Step-Son) at home that I have to take care of in the evenings. That means no weekday horse excursions for me! I depend on the weekends to get my horse time in....

                              This'll all get better for me when my Fiance and I build our house and barn this Summer. Then I'll have horses and home all in one place! Until then, I've decided to keep horses where they are for a few reasons (including saving up for that upcoming mortgage! Board at this farm is pretty cheap), but I have to say, it is VERY DIFFICULT some days to not get to be around them.

                              ...Sorry, my own blue-spell is coming into play. On a positive note, congrats on making plans to get back into riding! I'm sure you'll have a blast whenever you decide it is right for you to start again!
                              ~*~*~*~Founding member of the Spotted Saddlebred Pals Clique~*~*~*~

                              The equine love of my life: Gabriel
                              4/6/1993 - 8/23/2015 ...RIP my big, beautiful boy <3


                              • Originally posted by PaintedHunter View Post
                                Thanks! We did just a schooling show- Rolling Hills. My barn doesn't tend to go to rated shows, as most of us are working adults without the rated-show funds! Not that we're ready for bigger shows, anyway. Maybe one day. We're actually looking at changing up some shows next year- any recs for local shows in the area, up to a 2-ish hour drive or so?
                                I totally hear you about not being ready for rated shows, and frankly not having the desire to pay for them at this point.

                                I did one Rolling Hills show when I first started back riding, on a horse that belonged to my trainer. I like the people, but Wills can be a bit much. I don't find it very user friendly and the tree in the warm up arena is interesting!

                                We did the New Classic Horse Show series in 2011 and that was good. A well run, personable local series. The footing could have used improvement though.

                                I only did one show this year -- too busy with work and then Tajar had the whole sarcoid removal drama.

                                Have you thought about doing the HJ Fox shows at Conyers? My barn hasn't done them yet, but I think we are going to next year (first show is March 9 and 10). I have some friends who have done that series for a while and love it. Great facilities, great footing, good judges, lots of divisions for all levels, and really affordable for a 2 day show. I think I calculated it would be about $300 total to do the classes I was interested in on both Saturday and Sunday, and that included stall, shavings, etc. One day was about $200. That obviously doesn't include hauling or trainer fees.

                                Last edited by TarheelJD; Nov. 12, 2012, 05:03 PM. Reason: Add link.
                                Riding a horse is not a gentle hobby, to be picked up and laid down like a game of solitaire. It is a grand passion.... ~ Emerson


                                • My barn apparently did some HJ Fox shows a few years ago before I got there, and they had some bad experiences with the judging, and they aren't inclined to go back. I think they are considering Horse Show Ventures, but I don't know anything about that series. I think they're looking at Cheryl & Co. shows as well.

                                  And oh gosh YES on the tree in the warm-up ring! It also gets nuts toward the end of the day when the running ring people come in and commandeering the warm-up ring riding around really crazy. There was actually an incident with that causing a shouting match after a near-crash this past weekend. The people are so generally supportive of each other, though, and it is a happy sort of environment with low pressure. I hate how few adults are in the hunter and beginner rings though! I feel a bit out of place with my baby beginner re-rider self.

                                  We'll definitely need a show series with all levels, including jumper classes in 3' or above for some of our more experienced jumper riders. I'll only need 2'6" and under for me and my lug If we can get those darn lead changes this winter, I think by the end of next year we can be doing 2'6" at shows.
                                  Blog chronicling our new eventing adventures: Riding With Scissors


                                  • Paintedhunter, I'm with you. I hate being the only adult in a class. Sometimes you can't help it though. As I move up in height, it doesn't bother me quite as much.

                                    The warmup ring...I HATE!!! At every show I go to, it's a dangerous place to be. Kids especially tend to get in the way, stop in front of jumps, etc. Scares me. I try real hard to school at an odd time to lessen the chaos.

                                    If the ankle heals quickly, I would love to show at a local December 30th jumper-only show. Crossing my fingers.

                                    Classyride, thanks. Yes, my hubby is a keeper. . And it was fun to watch him have a lesson. He usually watches me.
                                    “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
                                    ¯ Oscar Wilde


                                    • Pancakes where are you? Check in and let us know if you're okay


                                      • I agree Paradox - warm up rings are generally harrowing! And I try to get there before they get too crowded, or sneak in right at the end of the day, when most people have already finished.

                                        PH - I am not surprised that there was a near crash this weekend in the "tree" ring. I have seen some insane near misses in there. I have heard good things about the Cheryl & Co. shows, and we were considering doing some this year, but as mentioned above, this season ended up being a wash. Maybe we can coordinate going to one of the same shows next year! You are more advanced than me, a we won't need to worry about competing against each other

                                        And yes, Pancakes. Give us a shout out when you get a chance.
                                        Riding a horse is not a gentle hobby, to be picked up and laid down like a game of solitaire. It is a grand passion.... ~ Emerson


                                        • Thanks for all the good wishes, folks! We really do appreciate it.

                                          As for those of you who want/need a good unrated show series, I wish you lived closer to Nashville. My barn has a wonderful show series with good judges, nice looking jumps, good schooling area, limited overnight stabling, good food at the concession stand, reasonable fees, and very pretty ribbons and year-end series awards. You would NOT be the only adult in the class. And even the 3' classes fill. They usually do a hunter show on Saturday and a jumper show on Sunday afternoon. www.hunterscourt.com for more details.

                                          And now, welcome to Accio! My suggestion would be to start riding now because none of us are getting any younger, and every day not spent riding is a day you will never get back. You can work on basics, figure out what half chaps and paddock boots you need, and during the winter months it may be possible to get more personal instructor time. That's just my opinion, and your individual circumstances may dictate a different course of action. Whatever you decide, we will offer support.

                                          Looks like I'll have at least one more big vet bill, but I'm very excited about it. While at the Alltech National Horse Show, my trainer met up with a very renowned lameness specialist who worked on some of our horses, and who is scheduled to come to TN on Thursday to look at a few more. We're going to have her look at my horse just to make sure he really is all better and good to go.

                                          Stay safe, and stay warm!
                                          It's 2018. Do you know where your old horse is?

                                          www.streamhorsetv.com -- website with horse show livestream listings and links.