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Can we have an adult re-rider support group?

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  • 2000 posts!!!!!!!!! Way to go re-riders!

    Bumknees you sound WAY better! Have fun riding the pony and working your way back. Sounds like a great plan.

    Jaslyn I hear you. I was totally frustrated by my trainer telling me to do something impossible that I finally just said "well I just can't". She said I was probably right and sent ME to the chiropractor instead of my horse. It has done wonders, and in fact, I was so crooked that it felt right and straight felt crooked. I also had to do the crop in the thumbs thing for a while. It really does work, I do it on my own occasionally just for practice.

    PH let us know how things go with your other horse at the trainers. It sounds like the right thing to do. I actually gave away my first horse, it was sad and not great financially but definitely the right thing for both of us.

    Tarheel good luck with the next cryo. Keep us posted.

    Pony4me sounds like good progress with Mr. Rehab!

    Not much new with us. My daughter got reserve champion this week, but a really small division at a smaller show. Never mind, she was happy and had fun. My son has decided not to show any more this season, which is fine. I think it was too stressful and maybe a bit too soon. I'm not showing for a bit due to funds running out and my daughter wanting to show as much as possible. Trainer thinks she will be too big for her small by next season so likely will look for a medium soon . I don't know who will be more sad when this pony goes back, her or me! I will show the last two shows of the season in September if I can. My horse keeps looking at me quizzically every time the trailer pulls out and he's not on it!


    • Yeah, looks like it's back to the chiro for me. At least this time I have something specific to work on,

      Congrats to your daughter, Hazel.

      And, thanks to Isaac, the "sunny" south will get another week of grey and rain. Good thing I brought all my tack home to clean.
      And nothing bad happened!


      • I'm definitely an over-thinker and that's not a positive trait in an amateur rider. Ha ha. I just started riding again April 2012 after a 6 year break. I turned 50 this year and I figured I better do it now or it will just get harder. For me it was important to have the right trainer support. I used to ride with a super technical trainer and that fried my brain as I tried to lift my right hand a quarter of an inch and shift my weight slightly from one hip to the other and walk long bending lines in the jumper ring. Ahhhhhh!!! Not for me. I'm an old fashioned hunter girl. I am best when I am confident and relaxed and trust my instincts and eye. My trainer keeps it simple and won't let me obsess over my position or the distance or anything really. At the root of my nervousness now is the fear of falling off. I know it will likely happen sometime and it probably won't hurt much more than 10 years ago but I'd like to avoid it as much as possible. I just bought a new 5yo TB who is very quiet after riding my old 21yo mare since April. I for sure could get in better shape but I think the most important things for me to stay safe and enjoy showing will be confidence and learning some anti-anxiety skills. I can ride just fine but your mind can mess with you. I do this for fun and I'm determined to settle my mind down so it will be fun.
        You don't scare me. I ride a MARE!


        • What is COTHer?


          • A COTHer is one of us, a Chronicle-of-the-Horse forum member.

            Hazel, congrats on your daughter's show!

            Sky has been such a good girl lately--yesterday she jumped our "skinny" jump for the first time without batting an eye! Hope this means she is getting braver!
            I heard a neigh. Oh, such a brisk and melodious neigh as that was! My very heart leaped with delight at the sound. --Nathaniel Hawthorne


            • Originally posted by equisusan View Post
              I'm definitely an over-thinker and that's not a positive trait in an amateur rider. Ha ha. ....turned 50 this year and I figured I better do it now or it will just get harder. ...... I do this for fun and I'm determined to settle my mind down so it will be fun.
              you go girl!

              another member here of the just turned 50 club (and the over-thinker club too). CONGRATS ON THE NEW HORSE!! big fun! I think you are on the right track If the fear part starts getting in the way of the fun part, I recommend EMDR (with a psychologist), it helped me a great deal!


              • RE: the saddle I like the flat pancake style cc ones I personelly do not see how they can call the one on the market today close contat when they are closer to barcco loungers.. so it would be a true 15 inch seat..

                tareheal good luck with the cryo. Do let us know how it goes.

                Hazle good going for your daughder thats woundful.

                I had OT,ST,and PT today and a lot of crying which I guss is normal whith a stroke. Im just not used to it especally in public. Icry all the time it seem like. which is one reason I dont post much. But any way I have them all 3 time a week my insurace approved 72 sessions of each so I aim to use them all before the end of the year to get better so the new year brings a new me and a able to ride and be able to show next year with out any problems.
                I tell yo what the mussels in my left arm( the one that was not effected) sure got lazy lifting a 1lb weight is hard.. so im working the left as well as the right arm it needs it bad.. I got lzy which i gusee is normal.
                In PT my balance is so far off.. I nearly feel over just looking to one side while walking.. inaging if I was on Toby..
                We wont even go how bad my speach/spelling or my math is it is embarassing.. cncidering I used to be able to be able to balance my check book in my head and need a calclater now... It is sad when I d thing whac bring on the crying, which brigng the embarrasment, whic shuts me down, wich make everythigh worse start it all over its a visious circle.. Im glad they know who to stop it or I still be there doing gosh know what....
                I was sent with home work.. sad... home work.. math.. addition.. sad.. single digit..

                sorry for that.. had to get it out and guys just happen to be here..
                Friend of bar .ka


                • Thanks Ray. I will definitely look into EMDR if necessary. I'm a total geek so I've got some apps for my ipad to help me with the performance anxiety.

                  Bumknees - keep your chin up. Don't lose faith in your own ability to fight your way back from the stroke. You can do it. Horse people are tough and you have it in you. Just let the embarrassment go. Its not important.

                  I, for one, am happy to support you with my words if I can.
                  You don't scare me. I ride a MARE!


                  • So good to hear from you bumknees! I am sure you are frustrated - I know I would be. So just telling you to cheer up probably won't help. But I can tell you these things:

                    1) Your writing/spelling continues to greatly improve on your posts, so you are definitely making progress.

                    2) Lots of people suck at math (me included). If you have to use a calculator, no big deal. That is why they were invented.

                    3) Your attitude is great - being committed to helping others while you are out of the saddle, and working towards concrete goals for getting back on Toby.

                    4) It's OK to cry every now and then. What happened to you sucks. Just know that you will get through this!

                    5) As equisusan said above, your re-rider compatriots are here to listen to you, and provide words of encouragement, any time.

                    Hazel: Congrats to your daughter on her Reserve Championship! And you are such a good mom to shelf your own showing for a while for her benefit. The selflessness exhibited by so many parents never ceases to amaze me.

                    Dewey: glad Sky is doing well.

                    PH: major props to you for doing what is best for your previous horse, even though it is hard. That is the difference bewteen merely being a rider, and being a horseperson.

                    Vet visit tomorrow on the cryo/sarcoids. I'll let everyone know how it goes.
                    Riding a horse is not a gentle hobby, to be picked up and laid down like a game of solitaire. It is a grand passion.... ~ Emerson


                    • Bumknees, hang in there! I've known other people who have found they have less control over crying and other emotional expression after a stroke, but that, like most things, can improve with time and therapy.

                      Stick with therapy! And BTW, brushing horses could be super good for both your arms. It was part of my informal "PT" after my accident... I had had "frozen shoulders" on both sides 8 years previously, and with the plate and everything after the accident, my left shoulder was threatening to freeze up again. I just started brushing any horse who would stand still for it, using both hands. It really helped.
                      You have to have experiences to gain experience.

                      1998 Morgan mare Mythic Feronia "More Valley Girl Than Girl Scout!"


                      • bumknees - I cry all the time. I cry at happy movies and sad movies. I cry watching fluff bios in sports coverage. I cry (looking the other way) when my 12 year old is a smart ass. Crying is because you are willing to look life in the eye and stare it down. You are brave! You will get back to horses!
                        You hate that, don’t you? Do you like oysters? You have to acquire a taste for oysters and the deep distance.”
                        -- George H. Morris on learning to love the deep distance


                        • thanks guys... Im just not use't to it...I guess.
                          Oh Out of the blue my neighbr called yeser to aks if i wantedto go and see Toby today... I cant wait.
                          It is anazaing sinine I can not drive and DH works weird hrs people when they have time ( which isnt always and I undsand) offer to take me out to see Toby. I wish there was something I could do for them, I know there there is nothing I could do cuz they would not take any thing for doing it. But I wish they would, if you were them and you were to thak some thing for doing this waht wold you want.
                          Friend of bar .ka


                          • Everyone likes brownies, cookies, banana bread, or muffins/cupcakes!

                            If someone has dietary restrictions, such as diabetes, you may be able to find a recipe for something sugar free, or gluten free, etc.
                            Riding a horse is not a gentle hobby, to be picked up and laid down like a game of solitaire. It is a grand passion.... ~ Emerson


                            • Bumkness- have a great visit with Toby! Agree with the others, I can tell you sound better in your posts. Keep up the good work! Gift card to a favorite restaurant works well or heck, even a gas gift card, it hit $3.52 here this AM.

                              HazelG- congrats to your daughter and sigh about making the "mom" decision to put your showing on hold for her. I know my parents did this sort of thing for me when I was growing up and I knew and appreciated it.

                              I've quite a couple of weeks, which is essentially a book!

                              High/low lights include flat tire on the way to the barn in a cell dead zone, texted my trainer and her husband came and put on my spare.

                              Schoolmaster I was leasing to see if we could bring him back in to work reinjured himself and is now retired. Sob. We were just really starting to have a good time.

                              Totally confused my lesson horse, the Sweetheart (only 6) and ended up spinning in a little circle. Trainer was bringing me my crop but said if I didn't get her going forward before she got to us she was going to use the crop on me! Got her going forward without crop while trying not to fall off from laughing.

                              Temporarily on the Little Grey Mare, the first horse I rode when I started at the barn. She is cute and sweet. We had a good ride last night even though I was still upset about the Schoolmaster (he was down in his pasture).

                              And now, as is truly my luck, the hurricane is probably going to rain out my Thursday lesson. Something does NOT want me to have two lessons in a row!!

                              Hope everyone on the east coast stays safe and can get some riding in.


                              • New re-rider!

                                Hi everyone! I am usually just on COTH reading but iechris convinced me to join this thread. She and I ride together (well, as long as it isn't raining), and I am so happy to be riding again after taking a break during law school. After I graduated, I ended moving from NC to SC for my job, and even though it took a little while, I feel very lucky because I am now riding at a great barn with an amazing trainer. I have been leasing a horse for a few months and riding 4-5 times a week, so I am finally starting to feel a little like my old self. I have really enjoyed reading your posts and hearing about your progress - you are all amazing! It is also nice to know that I am not the only person out there who struggles with balancing a job, family, and horses, but I can't imagine horses not being a part of my life, so I am determined to make it work!!
                                ~ Mirror Image (1998-2010) ~


                                • I am jealous AAHunter - there is no way I can get to the barn 4 or 5 times a week! You are one of the luckiest lawyers I know! So glad iechris convinced you to come onboard!

                                  The vet said the sarcoid areas look exactly like he wants them to - YAY! I will spare you any photos though, because the spots where the cryo was done look really raw right now. He said 2 to 3 weeks and we should be able to tack up again.

                                  Between Sunday and today, Tajar managed to throw the same shoe he threw a month ago But since we aren't riding right now, it wasn't too big of a deal. And the farrier was already scheduled to come tomorrow.

                                  Headed to the beach for Labor Day, so no riding this weekend. Hope everyone else gets in some good saddle time over the holiday.
                                  Riding a horse is not a gentle hobby, to be picked up and laid down like a game of solitaire. It is a grand passion.... ~ Emerson


                                  • Glad to see you back on here, Bumknees! You seem to be improving every time you post. Hope you get some good visits with Toby.

                                    Welcome to new posters, and a high five to all who have helped us get to 2000 posts.

                                    Tarheel, glad the sacroids are looking like good sacroids should.

                                    Mr. Rehab took a major step backwards today. He came out of his stall totally lame on the "good" front foot. And, off on the "bad-but-improving" foot. Barn had the vet out, and xrays don't show anything on the left (formerly good) foot, but show his coffin bone on the right (formerly bad) foot changing angle, and going down too close to his sole. He's wearing some Soft Ride booties right now, and has a recheck on Thursday. All this happened about a week after we were cleared for a bit more work, and we have not been overdoing it. So I'm totally bummed out, and close to emotional escalation, aka meltdown.

                                    My barn friends and the barn staff are being great, but the barn owner says he's very concerned. He doesn't say that very often. I'll be doing the happy dance if an abscess pops out!
                                    It's 2017. Do you know where your old horse is?

                                    www.streamhorsetv.com -- website with horse show livestream listings and links.


                                    • Welcome. AAHunter! This has been a fun group.

                                      Bumknees, I agree that you sound much better! As for your saddle, I used to ride in a PDN, and mine had a 17" seat. I am small (5'), so you may find a 17" small enough. These are easily available and not expensive. Good luck!

                                      I am so glad you have able to visit Toby, and I agree with iechris that a gas card would be an appropriate thank-you gift!

                                      pony4me, what a drag. You must be so frustrated at Mr. Rehab's setback! I'm keeping my fingers crossed that it's an abscess.

                                      Tarheel, great news about the sarcoids!

                                      Rode Skylark (my pet name for her) yesterday for about 20 mins before the heavens opened. She was very good considering the thunder and swirling wind. Even got one nice lead change in before we rushed back to the barn.
                                      I heard a neigh. Oh, such a brisk and melodious neigh as that was! My very heart leaped with delight at the sound. --Nathaniel Hawthorne


                                      • Welcome AAHunter!

                                        Tarheel that's great news!

                                        Pony4me no words of wisdom but a sending lots of support. Sounds like the general trend is positive with a setback. We'll just keep hoping it's just that, a small setback, not a total change. Try not to panic, it never helps. Keep us posted, and I'll keep all my fingers crossed for Mr. Rehab's continued recovery


                                        • The vist with Toby was wondeful. Lots of suffels..
                                          Im on way out of town to Manassass Va. to see my uncle who is turning 80 this weekend. Gosh what do you get an 80yr old who has everything he wants, needs, ect. you got me...

                                          tarehkeel I'm gald tht it's only a sarcoid. that meins(sp sorry) soon you can gets back sooner rather than later.2-3 weeks is sooner..

                                          pony4me so soory mr rehab seems to be tossing new thing your way.

                                          AAhunter welcome. you well have to excuse my speling im the brain damaged one. Im working on it. But welcome all the same. This is a wonful goup of people. Who will support, help you get you though diffiut times ( will pm if you havent post it a while to see if ok), encourage you, etc. //without makeing you feel alwakard about things. Well I imaging some thing are off limits... but you get idea. Welcome.
                                          Friend of bar .ka