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GM is nothing but a bully.

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    All I have to say is, how many of us get frustrated when people we interact with in our daily jobs either don't put in enough effort or do stupid things? There are days when I wish I could call it like I see it, but alas that's not what I get paid for. George does. I had a few semi-privates with George in my junior days, and never felt bullied or belittled and I'm not a great rider, but I am capable of following directions and putting in a good effort.

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      Hey tidy rabbit...where did you get the GM doll? my daughter lost her ken doll...LOL

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        Personal insults do not inform, do not correct, and do not have a consequence directly related to the behavior the teacher is trying to change. Basically - its ineffective, except perhaps in ridding the teacher of frustration.
        Nope- with some people it works VERY well. I am one of them. I am prone to not trying very hard for a number of stupid reasons. One of the best ways of motivating is getting after me with some force that makes me not want to question you. So yes, if on a windy day I did not want to jump a big wide oxer.... so I rode my horse to the base and stopped riding praying my horse would stop.... if coach one said "Get your fat ass over the jump you stupid turd you are wasting my time".... I'd buck up and do it.... if coach 2 said "OK honey you need to add leg at the base and everything is going to be ok, just try...." ummm.... I probably won't try.

        I don't get insulted- my thought is that they care enough to be mad at me and faith enough in me to push me.

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          I'm at the clinic
          If it makes you feel any better, she was eating lunch with him today and laughing with him.

          And, to respond to someone else who defended him on his notorious 'you need to be fit to do this sport' comments, while he critiqued his own pictures yesterday, he kept going on and on about how fat he was. Even though we know he's not fat. He said, "Look. I'm fat and I'm old. I need to start exercising more."

          Also, he is especially - I guess...perturbed at this particular rider because he really believes in her! He said to her yesterday, something like, "Don't do X (whatever it was)! I moved you up 20 places!!" He moved her up 20 places in the medal (or Maclay - whichever he judged this year)."

          Trust me, they totally get him and are completely unaffected.
          Thank you Anyplace Farm.

          Goes to show...not everyone is hyper-sensitive.

          If the person called a dumbell isn't upset about it, why is anyone else?

          If you dislike him or his methods...don't read about him online and don't pay for his opinion. Easy-peasy lemon squeezy. Why go looking for something that upsets you if it's not impacting you in any way, shape or form?
          You jump in the saddle,
          Hold onto the bridle!
          Jump in the line!
          ...Belefonte

          Comment


            Originally posted by Velvet View Post
            I will part company with you on this one. All it does is intimidate. If you need to intimidate someone, you are no longer teaching.

            Calling people names is a bullying technique. Doesn't matter how high and might you are--it still makes you a bully.
            So you have never spur-ed your horse or used a whip? You have never raised your voice at anyone in your life? That's pretty impressive.

            If someone called me a dumbell because I was on a 1500 animal that could kill me; I wasn't doing something after being repeatedly asked to - I would feel bad, yes but because I wasn't paying attention and doing what I should be not because someone called me a dumbell... And being called a dumbell I don't feel that's bullying or intimidating at all.

            Maybe if GM knocked me over at the lunch table and took my sandwich then I would be mad.
            Put your energy on what you want to grow!

            Comment


              "If it makes you feel any better, she was eating lunch with him today and laughing with him."

              Good for that kid, for taking it lightly. I know, and envy, people who can let things like GM's words not bother them. Some (enviable IMO) people are capable of just laughing things off. As a trainer once told me, don't let one bad moment ruin all the good ones.
              Rest in peace Claudius, we will miss you.

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                Originally posted by QHmom View Post
                Hey tidy rabbit...where did you get the GM doll? my daughter lost her ken doll...LOL
                I made it. It's kind of creepy though, what with it's shrunken apple doll head and all. I don't need it anymore now that I know he's not God. Send me your mailing address and I'll mail it to you...
                Stoneybrook Farm Afton TN

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                  Awesome!They were out of applehead dolls at christmas!

                  Comment


                    Originally posted by tidy rabbit View Post
                    I made it. It's kind of creepy though, what with it's shrunken apple doll head and all. I don't need it anymore now that I know he's not God. Send me your mailing address and I'll mail it to you...
                    Sorry but that is really cute!!!!
                    Put your energy on what you want to grow!

                    Comment


                      Originally posted by magnolia73 View Post
                      Dumbbell? Really. He called a rider a dumbbell who was consistently erring? I've heard worse.

                      It seems like 20-30 years ago, trainers got frustrated and mad when you kept messing up. Kind of jarred you into attention. Worked pretty damn well. It's not fun getting yelled at- but when it kicks you in the butt and you get results- you appreciate it.

                      I'm going to bet the girl in question is not really losing sleep over being called a dumbbell.

                      The nice thing is that there are plenty o' trainers who will praise you all day long. Ride with them if you are sensitive.
                      20-30 years ago it was also ok to beat your wife and kids. I would hope we've made progress as a society!

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                        I haven't read all 11 pages of replies but I wanted to chime in from what I watched. I personally thought he was a riot. He very obviously does not want to be wasting his time and when he says do something you better do it or at least try. The girl he was being very hard on when I watched was simply not doing what he asked, talking to the other riders, or even making an attempt to do what he asked. And when she did it right, he praised her. She was not the only one he was tough on. I'm ADD and have a hard time following directions but even I managed to understand what he was trying to ask and accomplish. Which delighted me. Can't wait to watch the rest of the videos that I missed, he has some great things in there I can't wait to try with my horse.

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                          Originally posted by doublesstable View Post
                          I have a lesson on Sunday - I hope karma doens't come bite me in the butt and I will ride off in tears. I need to pray my horses don't dump me and since I am of an older bone density, break something - eeekkkk......
                          * Sending jingles for a great lesson with no spills and no tears. *

                          Comment


                            Originally posted by Velvet View Post
                            Like I said, I am NOT a PC person, but this just smacks of bullying an an inability on the screamer's part to communicate. They need to go learn better communication skills.
                            I've seen trainers that I would call screamers. I would not include GM in that category at all. I would say his communication skills are quite good, in that he's been able to get his points across to help riders improve for more than half a century.

                            Again, his style is not for everyone. If you don't care for it, don't ride with him or audit his clinics.

                            Anyplace, thanks for the first-hand observations.

                            Comment


                              Originally posted by doublesstable View Post
                              If someone called me a dumbell because I was on a 1500 animal that could kill me;
                              So, now you're justifying it by saying he was yelling to save her life because she was in a dangerous situation and was possibly going to be killed by her horse?

                              Honestly, you can decide you want to accept this behavior. Have at it. I'm not saying you can't take it or for some reason (sadomasochistic) enjoy it. I'm just saying it's not an effective teaching technique and show's a lack of ability to communicate and to take into consideration another human being's feelings.

                              In an office, whether I want to call someone a name or not, I know that it is not effective and will not help people understand me, the situation or help us all reach a solution. Sometimes you have to learn to control yourself and your tongue. Definitely the same with teaching, and I'm glad that the USDF does not endorse this in their instructor/teacher educational programs (and their program has a LOT of issues, thankfully not this one).

                              As my grandfather was fond of saying, "Keep your temper. No one else wants it."
                              "And I'm thinking you weren't burdened with an overabundance of schooling." - Capt Reynolds "Firefly"

                              Comment


                                Originally posted by Sunnyhorse View Post
                                * Sending jingles for a great lesson with no spills and no tears. *

                                Oh THANK YOU SOO MUCH.

                                Now I'm ready to go clinic with GM - I would love to see if I could ride the entire thing without being called a dumbell...

                                You may hear a lot worse than dumbell....
                                Put your energy on what you want to grow!

                                Comment


                                  Originally posted by Velvet View Post
                                  So, now you're justifying it by saying he was yelling to save her life because she was in a dangerous situation and was possibly going to be killed by her horse?

                                  Honestly, you can decide you want to accept this behavior. Have at it. I'm not saying you can't take it or for some reason (sadomasochistic) enjoy it. I'm just saying it's not an effective teaching technique and show's a lack of ability to communicate and to take into consideration another human being's feelings.

                                  In an office, whether I want to call someone a name or not, I know that it is not effective and will not help people understand me, the situation or help us all reach a solution. Sometimes you have to learn to control yourself and your tongue.

                                  As my grandfather was fond of saying, "Keep your temper. No one else wants it."
                                  In all the times I've rode with GM I have never seen him lose his temper. I've seen him display some serious theatrics though, but never anger.
                                  Stoneybrook Farm Afton TN

                                  Comment


                                    oh, fer the love of.....wow.

                                    Yesterday my trainer was yelling at my lesson partner because she would.not.give to her horse with the rein, and the horse was getting more and more tense and angry. After several attempts to get the rider to do what he was telling her to do, which was put in very simple terms, he finally screamed: "Relax, goddammit! You need to f-ing relax!!" At which point we all cracked up, she relaxed and was able to get back in tune with her horse.

                                    It's a sport. It's a serious sport for many of us. It can be a deadly or at least a very dangerous sport. If you want to be the best you will come up against people who care about your abilities and how much work you are willing to put into them, not your feelings.

                                    Incidentally, life is often very critical, and that is just the way of it. I once saw a fellow student, back in grad school, burst into tears when other students were offering critiques of her paper during class. Given that a huge part of the job involves developing one's ideas, testing them and then putting the results out in public to be critiqued and possibly even refuted- often by extremely harsh peers- well, the consensus was that she either needed to toughen up or find another career. She toughened up and is a rising star in her subfield.

                                    If you produce sub-standard work, you need to be able to take criticism. If you are not paying attention, that (in my book) is even worse and you deserve to be called on it.

                                    Calling someone a dumbbell, by the way, is so incredibly mild these days. You'd have to be living in an Amish community to be seriously in agony over this, I think. Or a helicopter parent or the spawn of one, and please don't get me started on them.....
                                    You can take a line and say it isn't straight- but that won't change its shape. Jets to Brazil

                                    Comment


                                      Originally posted by Entourage View Post
                                      I haven't read all 11 pages of replies but I wanted to chime in from what I watched...
                                      Oh, lets not get derailed by somebody who actually watched the whole thing and LEARNED something.

                                      That spoils everything.

                                      And, yet again, these are the equivilent of wannabe NBA, NFL AL, NL and PGA players here, not newbies looking to be stroked for what they already know and have known for years. They want to advance to "The Show".

                                      This has no relation to your average 3rd grade class or even undergraduate work in college or "everybody wins" levels of "sport".

                                      I dunno, even I don't need assurances on what I know, I WANT to be told what I do not do well and do not expect to pay the big bucks for "I'm OK you're OK and you tried and that's what's important". Because I showed AA level and got dinged for the slightest mistake-which would waste my money. If it takes stronger language to get my attention? That IS what I am paying for.
                                      When opportunity knocks it's wearing overalls and looks like work.

                                      The horse world. Two people. Three opinions.

                                      Comment


                                        Here's the link. Sorry, it was a lesson, not a clinic so I guess that makes it ok that the horse was left dead in the arena while the lesson went on.
                                        Take your rose colored glasses off and stop hero worshipping, you might notice how cruel and callus he can be.

                                        http://www.chronofhorse.com/forum/sh...ad.php?t=35814

                                        Comment


                                          They need to go learn better communication skills.
                                          I don't understand this. If someone did something stupid, and was told so, where is the communication issue?
                                          There shouldn't be one single person on this thread who hasn't done something stupid on a horse. If your trainer didn't tell you it was stupid, they're not doing their job. If you took offense to being called dumb, for being demonstrably dumb, then you're worried about the wrong part of the incident.
                                          The analogies to classroom learning don't make much sense to me either. No matter how hard you yell at someone who doesn't understand a math problem, they're not going to understand it any better. Something that involves a physical effort, you can visually determine if someone isn't trying hard enough, or being sloppy in their execution, and motivate them to physically try harder or be sharper.

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