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Tacky? Or not?

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  • #21
    OMG, it is worse than tacky to ask something like that. I agree with everyone else, seriously consider moving your other horse. They don't deserve your money.

    BTW, I'm really sorry about your mare. Godspeed to her and hugs to you.
    RIP Bo, the real Appassionato


    • #22
      Talk about insensitive jerks. I'm so sorry that you had to be the victim of such rudeness. My condolences for your loss.


      • #23
        I have written a lot of contracts for boarding barns. It has never occured to me to put in a death clause or anyone lese. Thats so far out of left field who would even think that way

        I might whine in private about the loss of income, but to ask for a months board???? Not even close to acceptable behavior.


        • #24
          Retaliation is not the answer - but Tamara, you baaaaad. You need to talk to them. For sure, if they should cut the price for feed, hay, bedding and labour. If you do plan on staying (if you have no other options in the area you live), you don't want to burn bridges. If you have made a lot of friends, have fun, etc. I can see that. Go to them with an offer, decide ahead what you think is fair. Take a hubby, SO, buddy........strength in numbers. Are they absentee owners? Wonder how they look after horses in need since they are so callous.
          Proud member of People Who Hate to Kill Wildlife clique


          • #25
            so now contacts must say.......

            well now equinelaw is right, we've got to plan for deaths of horses in contracts. If horse dies and we've already paid for board, do we get $ back for hay and feed? and does any other horse (like the op has) get his stall cleaned X more times a day since she has paid for that? and how about shavings, double up on the other horse's stall?
            this is getting ridiculous when not only do you have the heartbreak of having to put your horse down, but you have to pay for another month of board for a dead horse.
            beyond tacky and totally wrong.


            • #26
              Very insensitive, I think. I do understand how difficult the boarding business is, but I second the poster who commented that if loss of one board check means financial ruin for the place, it's probably not a place I'd trust to get a hay and shavings order in when it's due. I'd start looking for a new place to board, rather than stay someplace where there's going to be tension and unpleasantness. Sorry about your horse and good luck. ):
              "Remain relentlessly cheerful."

              Graphite/Pastel Portraits


              • #27
                God, I am SO sorry.

                I could never imagine being the kind of person that would add to the pain for an owner at this time.

                If you really want to continue to keep your other horse there, it is a very tough situation.
                I think that if you just let it go, it will eat at you forever. And it will also allow them to feel that they can walk on you.

                Me, I would pack up both and move immediately, IF there was someplace you could go. And I would let them chase me for board. Because I think that is a sucky thing for them to do.
                At the very least, I would inform them that you would like them to give you your horse's allotted amount of grain and hay for the month now. As you will be donating it to a rescue in memory of your horse. And ask them to please stay out of your horse's stall during the month, as you will be leaving a memorial in there for that time period.

                Crap, I know, that is petty, but I think it totally bites that they would be so unkind during this time.

                Jingling that your horse has a peaceful passing, and that the other boarders are considerate and comforting, unlike the management and owners.
                I\'m not crazy. I\'m just a little unwell.


                • #28

                  I know I'll get trashed here but I would talk to the barn owner. I know this is tough but I would state exactly what you want to say like you said to us but in a nice way. Your feelings were hurt, etc.

                  If you want to stay at the barn and this is one terrible foot-inmouth situation that the barn owners did (who knows maybe they just weren't thinking and are now feeling really bad about it.) Talk about it. If you love the place and don't want to leave, then bring it up.

                  I don't know but horse people really get their feathers ruffled and rather tan talking about it, they walk out in a huff and then stew over it for years.

                  I know your horse is dying and this is a very, very sad situation but if you genuinely like the barn owners and the barn, see if there is a compromise. Maybe they have been taking care of your sick horse for free and are feeling a bit used.

                  Good luck and I feel for you and I don't want you to think this is callous, just opening up and telling the B/O your feelings and working out a compromise. Don't do it via e-mail, call them. Sometimes, e-mail comes out too sharp and can get misconstrued.
                  Sorry! But that barn smell is my aromatherapy!
                  One of our horsey bumper stickers! www.horsehollowpress.com
                  Add Very Funny Horse Bumper Stickers on facebook


                  • #29
                    so if your horse was injured or killed when their barn fell on it would they want next months board? this is simply amazing. As a barn owner I only get $100 per stall (not even that) from Board and the rest is actual cost so if you are left with trying to keep peace pay the empty stall rate. If they make you pay and if you do, paddlock that empty stall and place a wreath in front of it and demand they take your horse's feed and donate to a local charity.


                    • #30
                      Asking someone to pay board at a time like this is just wrong in so many ways. Talk about kicking someone while they're down.


                      • #31
                        That is tacky and I suspect you could probably sue them and win. I had one in my barn that had to be put down 3 days into the month and I refunded the balance of the month's board with a sympathy card. The day I get so hard up that I have to act like that, I'll get out of the boarding business.


                        • #32
                          It is indeed a tacky and insensitive thing to do. Just because one is technically "correct" about something doesn't make it right. Do you REALLY want to keep your other horse in such a place?

                          My sympathies.
                          Click here before you buy.


                          • #33
                            To say that the request is lacking in human compassion is a total understatement. My heart breaks for you my dear

                            People never cease to amaze me. Alas, now EquineLaw will be having to add the "death clause" to boarding contracts because as we all know: Make something idiot proof and they'll build a better idiot.

                            <>< Sorrow Looks Back. Worry Looks Around. Faith Looks Up! -- Being negative only makes a difficult journey more difficult. You may be given a cactus, but you don't have to sit on it.


                            • #34
                              I agree, very tacky, insensitive and rude. It's not like you are just moving and forgot to tell them.
                              Ditto the others who said see if you can negotiate to pay only a rate for the stall, and not feed hay etc.
                              I would pay whatever on the first, for the deceased horse's stall and the other horse, and at the same time hand them written notice that I will be out by the end of the month. There goes two incomes. I would put my horses in my garage if I had to before I would let people like that touch them one minute more.

                              plus I really like the suggestion about padlocking the stall with a memorial (you ARE paying for it after all) and taking the feed etc to a horse rescue.

                              BOy they really are something aren't they. That is just heartless.
                              "Perhaps the final test of anybody's love of dogs is their willingness to permit them to make a camping ground of the bed" -Henry T. Merwin


                              • #35
                                Another scenario where the horse would be gone - what if it were sold? Do BO's demand a months board in that situation? I wouldn't.

                                My horse was put down on the 8th of September - I had already paid Sept. board, I didn't ask for it back, the prorated amount was offered and I told her to keep it. It was sudden and unexpected, and I didn't want to deal with all that stuff.

                                The 30 day notice to me is so people pay their bills and don't just bolt whenever they feel like it. Most barns I've been in people are in and out coming in for training and then taking the horse home, horses are sold and purchased, no one gets 30 days on those, since one doesn't know when a horse will actually sell.

                                I've never heard of anyone asking for 30 days notice and paying board for a horse that has passed away!

                                I'm so sorry for your loss and for your having to even ask this question.


                                • #36
                                  Originally posted by cloudyandcallie View Post
                                  if it weren't for the fact that it would be disrespectful to the horse, I'd agree with you.
                                  hmmmm, maybe use it to store something else stinky?????????????
                                  the horse isn't there anymore...she won't care I certainly would get my hay and my feed and whatever grass the horse was supposed to be eating on a pounds per day intake...and at feeding time it'd be placed in the stall of the dearly departed right on schedule...

                                  in the end if they make you pay...is there someone you know who could stay there ? if it's all about a filled room at the end of the night it's not like that could begrudge another critter being there......

                                  like say a 800lb tusked boar who pees on his front legs??...wanna borrow mine ??

                                  edited to add...Calvin says that an auction house cow with Johnes would do as well...
                                  Last edited by Tamara in TN; Jul. 21, 2008, 09:40 PM.
                                  Production Acres,Pro A Welsh Cobs
                                  I am one of the last 210,000 remaining full time farmers in America.We feed the others.


                                  • #37
                                    Beyond tacky.

                                    Klassy. Reel klassy.

                                    I'd be moving the remaining horse ASAP.
                                    "It's like a Russian nesting doll of train wrecks."--CaitlinandTheBay

                                    ...just settin' on the Group W bench.


                                    • #38
                                      how nice of you

                                      Originally posted by Tamara in TN View Post
                                      the horse isn't there anymore...she won't care I certainly would get my hay and my feed and whatever grass the horse was supposed to be eating on a pounds per day intake...and at feeding time it'd be placed in the stall of the dearly departed right on schedule...

                                      in the end if they make you pay...is there someone you know who could stay there ? if it's all about a filled room at the end of the night it's not like that could begrudge another critter being there......

                                      like say a 800lb tusked boar who pees on his front legs??...wanna borrow mine ??
                                      yeah, he'll do. and he can eat all that food and not worry about colic.

                                      Originally posted by Daydream Believer View Post
                                      That is tacky and I suspect you could probably sue them and win. I had one in my barn that had to be put down 3 days into the month and I refunded the balance of the month's board with a sympathy card. The day I get so hard up that I have to act like that, I'll get out of the boarding business.
                                      how nice of you to do that. I wouldn't expect to have a refund, but if I had another horse there I'd want the extras for him. That was really nice of you to do that. And I hope that you still have that boarder with another horse.


                                      • #39
                                        Although my first thought was to direct the BO to www.etiquettehell.com, I don't think I have enough information to say they are intentionally rude. It all depends on the deal you have made with the BO for burial/cremation of your horse.

                                        If there is a free deal in the works:
                                        If your horse is being buried cost-free on their property, and they are doing the burial, OR they are transporting the deceased horse for cremation free of charge, then I can see how they reached this decision, skewed as it is. In this case, my suggestion would be to find out what similar backhoe owners are charging for burial service, or for trucking, and pay the BO for their time, fuel, etc. At this point, you are square, and if they agree, the stall charge would probably be dropped. If they won't go for you paying for services, and insist on the stall charge, pay for the stall-only without amenities, with a pro-rated rebate in case it is rented in August, and KEEP TABS on it!

                                        If you are paying for all services here up front, and they still insist on the stall charge, refer them to the above website, and leave without paying for the month of August.
                                        "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." Albert Einstein



                                        • #40
                                          August board

                                          Originally posted by 2TBs View Post
                                          On Wednesday I am having to put my mare down. I got an e-mail from the barn owner today that they would have to charge me her August board because "they couldn't afford to loose the income."

                                          I am kind of in a hard place because I have my other horse there and I want to stay in the barn. But I think it's kind of a crappy thing to do. Or am I wrong?
                                          What they are doing may be "correct" or legal, as per your boarding agreement says, but it is crap. What outstanding people they are. Are they implying that you should have considered the 30 day notice clause in your situation??!!! Perhaps you can discuss it with them and reach a compromise, after all, you did not plan this. I am sorry you are having to deal with that at this difficult time.