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A COTHer parody - Update, post #152 (because we all need a chuckle)

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  • A COTHer parody - Update, post #152 (because we all need a chuckle)

    It's miserable raining and I'm bored (also a little punch drunk from sleep deprivation). Anyway, I thought it might be fun to have a little COTH family roast imagining what it would be like to all walk XC together.

    Please, NO OFFENSE INTENDED! It's all in good fun and feel free to add on. There are lots of folks not mentioned, only because I ran out of energy

    Join us now as we observe this herd of COTHers in their natural habitat. It is unusual to see such a large grouping, let’s listen in . . .

    Fence 1:
    ACME: Must wear gloves, must wear gloves, must wear . . . squirrel!

    Janet: Has the TD inspected this jump? The rules are very clear about the spread and I think we may be over.

    Riderboy: Only the best dressage test ever, now my helmet cam can capture the win.

    JER: Sorry I’m late, I bumped into Mick Jagger on my way home from Capoeira club and we just couldn’t stop reminiscing. He is such a card.

    Yellowbritches: I may use the full cheek, mid port, double rein kineton on this course. I’m sure I have one in the barn.

    Fence 4:
    Carol Ames: Did you .

    Reed: I had my students calculate the thrust velocity required for the parabola of the inverse proportion of Pi. Unfortunately they forgot to account for the negative trajectory that occurs when the flux capacitor is in hyperdrive.

    Riderboy: “Good boy!!” What? I’m practicing.

    Deltawave: I’m gonna have to see some research to support the design of this trakhener. A blind sheep could see the data has been obscured by the marketing ploys of corporate sales.

    Carol Ames: What we’re missing is the long format.

    Fence 12a:
    JER: Are we almost done? I’m going to be late for my Sign Language for Sharks class, and you know how much the Cousteau’s hate to be kept waiting. Besides, I have to swing by Madonna’s place; she keeps borrowing my hairdryer and I’ve just had enough.

    Glenbaer: JMP and I love these fences.

    ACME: Has anyone seen my gloves? Oh wait, they’re in my . . . Squirrel!

    Gryhrs: Corner. It had to be a corner.

    Judybigredpony: I’ve got 15 chestnuts in my barn that would eat this for breakfast.

    Riderboy: Let’s just call it a day and go kick CMP’s ass.

    SwampYankee: Whipper-snappers! Get off my lawn!!!

    Vineyridge: I volunteer for jump judge. What? I get to watch the action and drink wine. Win win. (and I’m out of motrin)

    Last:
    Reed: I found the study. Now if we’ll all turn to page 14 . . .

    Gryhrs: What do you guys like for muscle soreness?

    Scubed: I have some links I can share, great products at a reasonable price.

    Lori B: Can’t beat a nice Tb for a course like this.

    Retread: Amen sister! Give me an OTTB any day.

    Riderboy: Sorry guys, I was kicking CMP’s ass. What’d I miss?

    Flightcheck: Testing, testing, 1,2,3. Hey, a helicopter!

    JER: Gotta go, there’s my ride.
    Last edited by ACMEeventing; Oct. 25, 2014, 06:33 PM.
    Always be yourself. Unless you can be Batman. Then always be Batman.

    The Grove at Five Points

  • #2
    The only thing more appropriate would possibly have been dw reminding me to stay on at the last fence.
    Amanda

    Comment


    • #3
      Good stuff, Acme.
      "Aye God, Woodrow..."

      Comment


      • #4
        Ha! That was great! We all need to be on some kind of team to go kick some European bootie.

        Comment


        • #5
          Awesome!!! Post of the Year!!!

          Comment


          • #6

            Comment


            • #7
              actually 3 chestnut geldings 17.1-16.2

              Comment


              • #8
                You rock ACME!!!!!!!! This is hilarious!!!

                Ok....I'll play.....

                ACME: I've got to get shoes on this damn horse.

                Riderboy: (saying to Gryhrs) I am sitting up!!

                Gryhrs: (saying to Riderboy) I am looking up!!

                Comment

                • Original Poster

                  #9


                  and Gryhrs, you forgot to add "now where's my damn beer?!"
                  Always be yourself. Unless you can be Batman. Then always be Batman.

                  The Grove at Five Points

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Sigh. I feel like I'm in high school over again and I'm STILL not part of the popular clique.

                    Sorry - whine over. Very clever, Acme!
                    "Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work." - Thomas Edison

                    So, the Zen Buddhist says to the hotdog vendor, "Make me one with everything."

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by eventer_mi View Post
                      Sigh. I feel like I'm in high school over again and I'm STILL not part of the popular clique.

                      Sorry - whine over. Very clever, Acme!
                      Hey - you and me both. And I'm her neighbor. Heading out to drive . . .
                      www.amiddle-agedmadwomantakesthereins.blogspot.com

                      www.pegasusridge.com

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Guilty. I do hate trakehners. (the jump, not the breed)

                        Click here before you buy.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          FANTASTIC, ACME!!!

                          Next installment will include (I hope):

                          Gnep: When I was growing up in Germany, we did these courses blindfolded and backwards on our horse. And now that I'm in America, I can do them in a blinding snowstorm.

                          RiverBendPol: It doesn't mean anything because its short format!

                          Denny: Back in the day, the water would be twice as deep and the riders three times as tough. Where are those riders today?

                          XCountrygirl: Are any of these OTTBs?

                          Frugalannie: Who has the frozen margarita machine? How close are they to the finish line?
                          They don't call me frugal for nothing.
                          Proud and achy member of the Eventing Grannies clique.

                          Comment

                          • Original Poster

                            #14
                            Originally posted by pegasusmom View Post
                            Hey - you and me both. And I'm her neighbor. Heading out to drive . . .
                            I'm leaving room for a sequel!!!!

                            Besides, the I know you two. Not the same as assigning dialogue to internet profiles
                            Always be yourself. Unless you can be Batman. Then always be Batman.

                            The Grove at Five Points

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              I was like, 'Mick Jagger? Never met him. Hair dryer? Never owned one.'

                              Then I looked at the thread title and saw 'parody'. Oh.

                              Very clever, ACME.

                              Comment

                              • Original Poster

                                #16
                                Originally posted by frugalannie View Post
                                FANTASTIC, ACME!!!

                                Next installment will include (I hope):

                                Gnep: When I was growing up in Germany, we did these courses blindfolded and backwards on our horse. And now that I'm in America, I can do them in a blinding snowstorm.

                                RiverBendPol: It doesn't mean anything because its short format!

                                Denny: Back in the day, the water would be twice as deep and the riders three times as tough. Where are those riders today?

                                XCountrygirl: Are any of these OTTBs?

                                Frugalannie: Who has the frozen margarita machine? How close are they to the finish line?
                                I love it! More, More!!!

                                Pegasusmom: When I was organizer a woman could find a drink around here!

                                EventerMi: (to self) "get it together, woman. For God's sake you deal with hormonal high schoolers all day. How bad could the Novice ditch be?"
                                Always be yourself. Unless you can be Batman. Then always be Batman.

                                The Grove at Five Points

                                Comment


                                • #17
                                  <sighs with happiness>
                                  You really DO love me. Guilty as charged.
                                  "Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work." - Thomas Edison

                                  So, the Zen Buddhist says to the hotdog vendor, "Make me one with everything."

                                  Comment


                                  • #18
                                    I love the Eventing board. If this were to take place on Horse Care we'd have all manner of death threats, police action, and hissy fits going on.
                                    Click here before you buy.

                                    Comment


                                    • #19
                                      Do you even know me?! Have you done ANY research? Next time check the facts before posting.

                                      Comment


                                      • #20
                                        Originally posted by eventer_mi View Post
                                        Sigh. I feel like I'm in high school over again and I'm STILL not part of the popular clique.

                                        Sorry - whine over. Very clever, Acme!
                                        Me three

                                        by the way very clever ACME
                                        "Never do anything that you have to explain twice to the paramedics."
                                        Courtesy my cousin Tim

                                        Comment

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