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Jingles needed were for kcmel. She passed

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  • #61
    A nice remembrance and photos of Mel on Eventing Nation. https://eventingnation.com/in-memory...lanie-tallent/

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    • #62
      Thank you for sharing that, skydy. ❤️

      What a sad and tragic loss to both the Eventing and scientific communities 😥

      Godspeed, Melanie - you were loved and admired by many, both here on COTH (where you “classed up the joint”) and among your friends and family.

      Apparently only the good die young.
      "Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies."

      "It's supposed to be hard...the hard is what makes it great!" (Jimmy Dugan, "A League of Their Own")

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      • #63
        You're welcome.

        I was hoping to see a memorial in the equestrian press and am surprised that the COTH hasn't mentioned her passing.

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        • #64
          Holy Shit!!! Didn't she have the cute paint draft cross??!! I am just so devastated to read this! She seemed like such a lovely person and was always encouraging. How hearbreaking! Thanks for letting us know.
          Fat Cat Farm Sporthorses on Facebook
          Fat Cat Farm Sporthorses Website and Blog

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          • #65
            I didn't know her, but prayers for her family and friends. She sounds like she was a kind, giving, talented woman in her community and on COTH. Praying for peace for everyone who knew her.

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            • #66
              Originally posted by FatCatFarm View Post
              Holy Shit!!! Didn't she have the cute paint draft cross??!! I am just so devastated to read this! She seemed like such a lovely person and was always encouraging. How hearbreaking! Thanks for letting us know.
              See the link Post #61 There are photos of her with him there.

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              • #67
                I am so sad and sorry. Deepest condolences to her family and her friends.
                A Fine Romance. April 1991 - June 2016. Loved forever.

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                • #68
                  Oh wow. I’m so sorry to read this. Kcmel was kind, wise and a valued contributor here. I only wish that I had gotten to know her in real life.

                  My sincerest condolence to all of her loved ones and friends. Life is just so unfair. I will miss her.

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                  • #69
                    Originally posted by SonnysMom View Post
                    A friend of mine was injured in a riding accident yesterday. She is in ICU with a head injury. The height of the jump was well within her and her horse's ability and below her normal competition height. Not exactly sure what happened.

                    Any good thoughts, prayers and jingles would be appreciated

                    when I originally posted this I didn't feel comfortable putting her name out there. However as a number of people now know COTH has lost one of own. kcmel passed away from her injuries on Friday. Melanie will be greatly missed by everyone who knew her. She was always kind, smiling and supportive.
                    Hi, I am her nephew. What exactly happened that day? Was the horse misbehaving, did something scare the horse, what? She was an expert rider, so all this doesn't make sense. We need to find out so it won't happen to anyone else in the future.

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                    • Original Poster

                      #70
                      Originally posted by bradt99 View Post
                      Hi, I am her nephew. What exactly happened that day? Was the horse misbehaving, did something scare the horse, what? She was an expert rider, so all this doesn't make sense. We need to find out so it won't happen to anyone else in the future.
                      I am sorry for your loss. Melanie was a wonderful person. I was not there when she had her accident so cannot answer your questions. Regrettably accidents like this don't always make sense. All it takes is a slip, a misjudged distance on the part of either the horse or rider, a disagreement between horse and rider on where to take off or a number of other factors.
                      While we would love to prevent all accidents like this in the future we all know that when we go jump solid cross country fences getting hurt is a very real possibility no matter how careful we are.
                      When you ride horses you are trying to align 2 brains to do one job. Most of the time that isn't an issue but on rare occasions things don't work out as planned. It may be that nobody was at fault. Just that sometimes bad accidents happen to good people.
                      I totally understand you wanting to find answers and trying to make sense of such a tragic situation.
                      Once again I am sorry for your loss. I will miss Melanie. She was a wonderful person.
                      Oh, well, clearly you're not thoroughly indoctrinated to COTH yet, because finger pointing and drawing conclusions are the cornerstones of this great online community. (Tidy Rabbit)

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                      • #71
                        Originally posted by bradt99 View Post
                        Hi, I am her nephew. What exactly happened that day? Was the horse misbehaving, did something scare the horse, what? She was an expert rider, so all this doesn't make sense. We need to find out so it won't happen to anyone else in the future.
                        I don't think that anyone here was with your Aunt when she had the accident. The jumps on the course were known to be within her ability.

                        You, being family, will be able to find out the specifics of what happened by asking the people that saw her accident. We won't.
                        I am so sorry for your loss. Your Aunt was loved and respected by many people.

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                        • #72
                          It makes no sense. Christopher Reeve had his accident in 1995 and he survived even though he was paralyzed. I have to find someone who was there. How do you all suggest I find someone who was there?

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                          • #73
                            My uncle in law would know something, but he's in PA and we are in TN. We are having two separate services as a matter of fact in each state. Melanie was born in TN, but lived in PA with her husbands family.

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                            • #74
                              Originally posted by SonnysMom View Post

                              I am sorry for your loss. Melanie was a wonderful person. I was not there when she had her accident so cannot answer your questions. Regrettably accidents like this don't always make sense. All it takes is a slip, a misjudged distance on the part of either the horse or rider, a disagreement between horse and rider on where to take off or a number of other factors.
                              While we would love to prevent all accidents like this in the future we all know that when we go jump solid cross country fences getting hurt is a very real possibility no matter how careful we are.
                              When you ride horses you are trying to align 2 brains to do one job. Most of the time that isn't an issue but on rare occasions things don't work out as planned. It may be that nobody was at fault. Just that sometimes bad accidents happen to good people.
                              I totally understand you wanting to find answers and trying to make sense of such a tragic situation.
                              Once again I am sorry for your loss. I will miss Melanie. She was a wonderful person.
                              Thank you. I wish I could be with her, but I know it's not my time yet.

                              Comment


                              • #75
                                Originally posted by bradt99 View Post
                                It makes no sense. Christopher Reeve had his accident in 1995 and he survived even though he was paralyzed. I have to find someone who was there. How do you all suggest I find someone who was there?
                                My dear bradt99, every accident is different and every brain injury incurred is different. We can't compare brain/head injuries like they are broken arm or leg bones. Your Aunt and Mr. Reeve had brain injuries, but they were different.

                                No one who was there when she had her accident can tell you about her specific brain injury, only the Doctors who took care of her in the hospital can do that.
                                The brain is too delicate an organ, and there is still so much research going on, for science to be able to predict the outcome or to know why some folks have better outcomes while some don't.

                                Whether they've been in a car accident or tripped in their home and hit their head on the floor, or have fallen off a horse, or fallen from a ladder while painting their house, no one's injury is the same. Some people are fine. Some people are knocked out and wake up after awhile and then get better (that happened to me). Some people live for awhile and then they die. Some people die right away.

                                I am so very sorry for your loss. You can be proud of how your Aunt was studying this very subject, and trying to make a difference in peoples lives who have brain injuries and problems. She also always used safety gear, just like other people who play sports do.

                                I know how difficult this must be for you.

                                It is certainly not your time yet, it will just take time for you to feel better, but I promise, it will get easier. You will remember her with fondness and not as much of the sharp pain of loss that you feel now.

                                Take care and please tell your folks that even those of us who only knew her from chatting with her on line, thought she was a very nice person.

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                                • #76
                                  Thank you, I hope there is a cure for brain injuries one day.

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                                  • #77
                                    Originally posted by bradt99 View Post
                                    Thank you, I hope there is a cure for brain injuries one day.
                                    Hi Brad,

                                    I talked to your uncle in law Gordon the other day (My hubby sold him a few pieces of home audio equipment). He knows what happened I would talk to him if you have questions.

                                    I would try to explain a few things here.

                                    1) She wasn't an expert level rider. She was an established Amateur rider who worked harder than a lot of people I know to develop her skills further and become a stronger rider. She was better than a lot of people and not as advanced as a lot of people. That's pretty true of a lot of riders in the world. The joy of riding, and indeed golf as well, is that there is never a point where you know everything and can't learn anymore. It is a lifetime (or more) to do it well and you can always find new ways to do old things and each horse will bring out a different set of skills to learn. From the layperson's view it may seem we just sit on the animal and steer but there are so many different things that we're doing in the saddle. It's not at all simplistic and it takes YEARS to do it well.

                                    2) She didn't fall in a competition setting. She was with her trainer at a local xc schooling facility and was practicing jumping outdoor obstacles that we commonly see on the cross country phase of a competition.

                                    3) Having been at the show where Christopher Reeve had his accident let me assure you that the jump and indeed Chris's experience were not at fault. There really is a way to fall (And not just riding a horse) where you land with your full body weight on your neck vertebrae and you're screwed. Chris did it. And recently a show jumper had a very similar fall and is currently in rehab trying to get back as much of his body's uses as he can. He just manged a full 24 hours off the ventilator breathing on his own. That's a huge, very positive thing at this point in his recovery.

                                    4) We have improved safety in a lot of ways. But as we have had 2 eventers died in the US this past week all of us are more than a bit shell shocked and the natural response is to look for more and better ways to be safer. Me personally I think that this is a stark reminder that riding a horse and jumping fences is inherently dangerous. I know that Mel had a helmet and a vest on and I am sure that Nicole did as well. This is the standard equipment. But it doesn't mean that you won't get hurt. Science and technology have improved vests and helmets and will continue to do so but we will still likely continue to lose riders. Hopefully not at this pace but falling under a 1200lb animal at 30 mph is a hard thing to ensure your safety doing.

                                    5) Brain injuries are unlikely to have one cure as they're all different in their makeup as skydy correctly pointed out.

                                    I really adored your aunt. She was a person I looked up to for her steadfast dedication and commitment to improving and I really enjoyed watching her progress in her abilities with both of her horses. I am sad for her passing but hoping only that those who mourn her will appreciate that she really did grab life by the horns and really lived. I mean I think that's the best that any of us can do. And to know the joy of galloping on the back of your beloved equine partner... for a horse person that's a unique thrill that brings a type of joy and peace I have not been able to compare with other hobbies or sports.

                                    Emily
                                    Last edited by Xctrygirl; Oct. 15, 2019, 01:05 PM. Reason: Kevin B did 24 hrs off the ventilator last night!!!!
                                    "Courage is not the absence of fear but rather the judgment that something is more important than fear. The brave may not live forever but the cautious do not live at all." ~2001 The Princess Diaries

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                                    • #78
                                      I can't believe this news. I am so sorry to everyone who knew and loved her.

                                      bradt99 the safety issues in our sport are extremely complex, in this forum there are a lot of threads with a lot of information on the safety of our sport, and analyzing why these things may happen. You may find it helpful to read through the eventing forum a bit to give yourself a better understanding of the sport of eventing and the issues it faces.

                                      Boss Mare Eventing Blog

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                                      • #79
                                        Removed by request.
                                        Last edited by Where'sMyWhite; Oct. 15, 2019, 05:25 PM.
                                        When you start to observe, you become more effective... your movements soften, you see more, you are more available to becoming a team member. Be an Observer first, a Handler second.

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                                        • #80
                                          Beautiful post Em.
                                          Brad I am so very sorry for your loss. Your Aunt Melanie was clearly one heck of a special lady. I loved to read her posts, she was always upbeat and enthusiastic for her sport and horses in general. She will be greatly missed by many, many folks here on the internet and of course, irl.

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