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am I being snubbed or not??

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  • am I being snubbed or not??

    This may be more of a vent than anything else but it's really bumming me out. For whatever reason the person I've been taking lessons with has decided to NOT return Phone my calls. She did respond to one email to say "thanks for the check but she would not be available to give me a lesson on the date I requested". I've called and emailed her a few more times to find out when she would be available but so for have heard nothing!! It's been over a week and she has never not returned calls or emails before. I know she got upset because she came to ride for me while I was on vacation a few weeks back and twice the horses we're not in there stalls ready for her and there was some confusion but I paid her anyway because she did come out and spend time trying to "catch' the horse even if she didn't ride . (my bad) So I'm bummed because I really was learning from her and making progress. Am I getting the brush off here. I know she's going on vacation later this week but it's still not like her to not respond. Could the situation involving the horses not being ready for her cause her to act this way. If so, isn't that a bit ridiculous.
    . I feel like I've been pink slipped even though I'm the one signing the checks..

  • #2
    hmm...

    If I were coming out to ride someone's horse and they were out twice, I'd be wondering if they were taking my time seriously.

    I am not good about returning calls. it takes me usually two days to return calls. Email is far the best way to contact me. So Maybe is there a better way to try and contact her?

    Otherwise, yea.. you might be getting brushed off. Remember, horsie pro's aren't usually showing up for a just a check. If they aren't riding and making progress with a horse, THen they aren't getting the word out that a horse is progressing with them. Word of Mouth is big. If you aren't being proactive then you are wasting time. At least that is how I feel.

    Sorry you are having a time of it... maybe go visit and bring something tasty?? Put forth some exra effort to let them know you aren't wasting their time.
    If i'm posting on Coth, it's either raining so I can't ride or it's night time and I can't sleep.

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    • #3
      But the OP said she was on vacation when the horses weren't ready - would you punish a client if the barn they were at didn't follow her instructions while gone?

      Comment


      • #4
        Why don't you wait a while and call her back when she's more likely to answer the phone. she may be busy or she may have had it with the arrangement. not sure i'd blame her.

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        • #5
          She's just not that into you.

          Comment


          • #6
            Call her back. Leave a message along the lines of "I am worried that you no longer want me as a client. As a professional courtesy, could you please at least let me know one way or the other?"

            The worst she can do is not return your call, which I would consider highly unprofessional and that would be enough for ME to drop HER.
            "My friends, love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we'll change the world." ~ Jack Layton

            Comment

            • Original Poster

              #7
              Originally posted by Rhiannonjk View Post
              But the OP said she was on vacation when the horses weren't ready - would you punish a client if the barn they were at didn't follow her instructions while gone?
              the barn in question is actually my own private backyard facility but the guy I had taking care of the horses for me in my abscense had mistakenly let them out once when they were supposed to be in and the other time I messed up and told him to keep the horses out because I forgot she was coming ( remember I was on vacation ) and I called and apologized to her for that and I thought everything was fine..mmm

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              • #8
                Sounds like she's giving you a bit of attitude. Could be that she's busy getting ready for her vacation and that she isn't thinking past it. If you know the dates she's gone, I'd wait till she's back and try again. If she's still brushing you off, then accept it and move on.

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                • #9
                  Originally posted by Coreene View Post
                  She's just not that into you.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Or... could be she has had a problem and is not available to anyone. I would try and find out more info - ie: if she is OK.

                    Jill

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                    • #11
                      Is she giving you the brush off? Yes. Should you try to remedy the situation? Depends on how much you need her input, as opposed to finding someone else. I can't blame her for thinking her time is better spent elsewhere. But if she's your only option for training help (unlikely), then make amends along the lines others are suggesting.

                      Question: Was the check you sent her for PAST training, or FUTURE training? If future, then she certainly does need to agree to schedule some more with you, to earn that pay. But if you're paid up on what she's done so far, it sounds like she doesn't find a future training relationship to be worth her while. Don't take it personally -- she's in a business where her time equals money and opportunity.

                      Originally posted by Rhiannonjk View Post
                      But the OP said she was on vacation when the horses weren't ready - would you punish a client if the barn they were at didn't follow her instructions while gone?
                      Yes, though "punishment" is the wrong word. I'd reevaluate the time I spend on that client if client forgets that I'm coming and forgets to instruct staff or ensure staff understands the schedule.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Dixon View Post
                        Is she giving you the brush off? Yes. Should you try to remedy the situation? Depends on how much you need her input, as opposed to finding someone else. I can't blame her for thinking her time is better spent elsewhere. But if she's your only option for training help (unlikely), then make amends along the lines others are suggesting.

                        Question: Was the check you sent her for PAST training, or FUTURE training? If future, then she certainly does need to agree to schedule some more with you, to earn that pay. But if you're paid up on what she's done so far, it sounds like she doesn't find a future training relationship to be worth her while. Don't take it personally -- she's in a business where her time equals money and opportunity.



                        Yes, though "punishment" is the wrong word. I'd reevaluate the time I spend on that client if client forgets that I'm coming and forgets to instruct staff or ensure staff understands the schedule.

                        How much better can it get to be payed for not working?!

                        Anyhow, a week is a long time to return calls or emails. I like the idea of asking point blank, because the OP has better things to do than playing phone tag (with an unresponsive partner at that!!)

                        The OP messed up on the rides, but paid for them... big deal. But not getting someone to answer the phone or returning message and emails?! And there she calls herself a professional! tsktsktsk.....
                        Originally posted by BigMama1
                        Facts don't have versions. If they do, they are opinions
                        GNU Terry Prachett

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Alagirl View Post
                          How much better can it get to be payed for not working?!
                          From the sounds of it, she didn't get paid for nothing. She got paid for driving out there and trying to catch horses that wouldn't be caught. As a dance instructor, I had a client who would continually either call at the last minute to cancel (too late to schedule someone else or make new plans) or not even call--just not show up. He would pay for it which is fine, but that didn't save me the annoyance of putting up with rush hour traffic to get to the studio to teach him, giving up an hour that I could have spent with my family or a student who takes their dancing seriously, etc. It's a lack of respect issue (not saying that was the case with the OP, but repeated offenses might appear that way). I was the second teacher that I know of to drop him.

                          OP, you got some excellent suggestions here. Apologize again for the mishap, assure her it won't happen again, and ask her if she'd be willing to work with you again. The worst that can happen is that she'll not answer again!
                          Jennifer Walker
                          Proud owner of Capt Han Solo+, Arabian stallion http://www.capthansolo.com
                          Author, freelance writer http://www.authorjennwalker.com

                          Comment

                          • Original Poster

                            #14
                            Originally posted by Dixon View Post
                            Is she giving you the brush off? Yes. Should you try to remedy the situation? Depends on how much you need her input, as opposed to finding someone else. I can't blame her for thinking her time is better spent elsewhere. But if she's your only option for training help (unlikely), then make amends along the lines others are suggesting.

                            Question: Was the check you sent her for PAST training, or FUTURE training? If future, then she certainly does need to agree to schedule some more with you, to earn that pay. But if you're paid up on what she's done so far, it sounds like she doesn't find a future training relationship to be worth her while. Don't take it personally -- she's in a business where her time equals money and opportunity.
                            Yes, though "punishment" is the wrong word. I'd reevaluate the time I spend on that client if client forgets that I'm coming and forgets to instruct staff or ensure staff understands the schedule.

                            I have apologized for the mixing up of scheduels,etc. Geez it's not like I killed someone ?LOL

                            Perhaps trainers should also recognize the "future" value of a client. I love taking lessons and I will also pay for extra training while I'm learning. If I find a tainer who's good , I'll stick with that person for who knows how long..it could be years. Why would any trainer want to threaten that relationship by being inflexible and uncooperative. A good one will try to make it work and not run off in a huff the first time the world doesn't turn according to their personal likes. Word of mouth is a big thing in this business. Yes I am human and god forbid I actually "forget" something or make a mistake. Trainers come and go..none of them are Gods but no trainer will be in business without clients.. All clients big and small. I pay on time..show up for lessons ready to go and last time I checked I was the one forking over the $$$$$. I like to give my business to someone who wants to help me instead of acting like "they're doing ME a favor" by showing up. This is not directed at any one individual just in general. ok...I hope I haven'' stirred up a can of worms here, that is not my intention at all.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by bovon View Post
                              it's still not like her to not respond.
                              Unprofessional.

                              Comment


                              • #16
                                Originally posted by bovon View Post
                                I have apologized for the mixing up of scheduels,etc. Geez it's not like I killed someone ?LOL

                                Perhaps trainers should also recognize the "future" value of a client. I love taking lessons and I will also pay for extra training while I'm learning. If I find a tainer who's good , I'll stick with that person for who knows how long..it could be years. Why would any trainer want to threaten that relationship by being inflexible and uncooperative. A good one will try to make it work and not run off in a huff the first time the world doesn't turn according to their personal likes. Word of mouth is a big thing in this business. Yes I am human and god forbid I actually "forget" something or make a mistake. Trainers come and go..none of them are Gods but no trainer will be in business without clients.. All clients big and small. I pay on time..show up for lessons ready to go and last time I checked I was the one forking over the $$$$$. I like to give my business to someone who wants to help me instead of acting like "they're doing ME a favor" by showing up. This is not directed at any one individual just in general. ok...I hope I haven'' stirred up a can of worms here, that is not my intention at all.
                                It seems like your mind is made up ... find someone else who has the same values and concerns that you do.
                                *=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=

                                Comment


                                • #17
                                  She's just not that into you.
                                  Humans don’t mind duress, in fact they thrive on it. What they mind is not feeling necessary. –Sebastian Junger

                                  Comment


                                  • #18
                                    You're getting all mad, and the woman might just be busy. Or her mother died. Or she broke her leg. Or she didn't get your message. Ever think of that?

                                    Once again. Give it some time, call her back, ask her if she wants to come out again. Try not to sound too miffed yourself

                                    It's very hard to get people to come out to 'my backyard facility'. If they can get work closer to home, especially with gas at 3 and a half bucks, they are going to take it. The more time they spend driving between places, the more time and the more money they lose. Alot of people I have talked to have changed their lesson route since gas prices jumped up. Most trainers now charge mileage if they have to drive to another barn. Even if they get mileage, they are still losing that time. If the lessons were all at one barn, she'd teach back to back, and be able to fit in twice as many lessons, and get home in time to actually have her husband see her, and not have her own dog bark at her when she drives in because he can't remember who the hell she is.

                                    Teaching riding, is, after all, a JOB. People have bills to pay.

                                    Example. Get up at 7 am, start driving. Get to your barn, ride your horses. Drive to your first lesson. 30 minutes. 30 minutes of d****** around at barn 1 while student tacks up, student is running late, gee, sorry. You still have to teach for an hour. You start teaching at 10:30 instead of 10. You teach an hour. Student wants to chit chat after. Yu have to cut her off. You are still late to your next lesson, even though you drive like a maniac. Your student 2 is pissed that you are late, and leaves. YOu lose that lesson, but you have already driven there. You drive to your next lesson, and are supposed to ride two horses for someone who's out of town. The horses aren't in. YOu chase them around for a while, and about then, you've had it.

                                    Comment


                                    • #19
                                      I was going to not answer this post, but then I realized I might be snubbing you I kind of agree not to make a mountain out of a molehill. Something crazy is probably going on in her life. I'd let it ride until after vacation then you'll know soon enough if she's giving you the slip.
                                      Kathy Johnson

                                      Comment


                                      • #20
                                        She might be snubbingyou, but then she might not, either, just going into vacation mode and letting you slide.

                                        Here is what I would do.

                                        Wait until she is back from vacation. Only just back, though. Email her, and begin with an apology about the horses and your vaction. Tell her, briefly, how invested you are in what she has to teach you and your horses, in particular, and even describe some of the things you anticipate learning with her, based on what you have already started. Ask her if she is willing to continue with you as a student, and give her some base times and dates you would like to commit to with her. Give her, say five, the first one coming up within a week of your note to her, and ask her to get back to you.

                                        Then, make some preliminatry calls to line up your second in line choice for a trainer. you may or may not hear from her. If you do, great. If not,go with your new idea for a trainer. Move on, learn lesson, and feel good, at least you apologized and did as well by her as you could, at the end.

                                        She may rally to your positive attitude.

                                        Good luck, let us know! I'd like to hear...
                                        Airborne? Oh. Yes, he can take a joke. Once. After that, the joke's on you.

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