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Funny things the non-horsey people say...

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  • #21
    Fell off my horse for the first time, drove myself home MUCH earlier than DH had expected, and the first thing he said when he saw me covered in arena sand was "Well, you weren't wearing your magic sticky pants."

    He's right - it was hot and I wasn't about to wear the fleece-lined pair (the only pair I had at the time) when it was 80 degrees out!

    Guess who was propped up on her right hip online searching for full-seat unlined breeches within 20 minutes?
    "Let's face it -- Beezie Madden is NOT looking over her shoulder for me anytime
    soon . . . or ever, even in her worst nightmares."


    Member, Higher Standards Leather Care Addicts Anonymous

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    • #22
      Was talking with a friend's dad, who kept mentioning his co-worker did "triage".

      He's in IT, so it's entirely plausible . . . until it occurred to me that he probably meant "dressage"!

      Since it was the day of my friend's mom's funeral, I didn't bother correcting him.
      "Let's face it -- Beezie Madden is NOT looking over her shoulder for me anytime
      soon . . . or ever, even in her worst nightmares."


      Member, Higher Standards Leather Care Addicts Anonymous

      Comment


      • #23
        Another one from my dad - at my first horse show when I was a kid, my dad filled out the entries. In the "gender" box, he put "F". The show staff chased us down later for clarification, to which he explained that "F" stood for female. Good 'ol dad
        "There are times when you can trust a horse, times when you can't, and times when you have to."

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        • #24
          When my mare is in heat she turns into a spooky, bucky and whinnying beast. I ended up riding her during the first day of her heat and it was bolt, bolt, buck, buck, buck, bolt bolt. Wash and repeat. When I finally ended our ride my mom said, "Oh she looked great, she only took off and bucked a few times."

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          • #25
            My sister's friends came and rode my old horse, and one of them asked if he had a disease because he had spots around his eyes and nose. He was an appaloosa!! (these girls were 16/17 at the time)

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            • #26
              Originally posted by Pipkin View Post
              My sister's friends came and rode my old horse, and one of them asked if he had a disease because he had spots around his eyes and nose. He was an appaloosa!! (these girls were 16/17 at the time)
              Man, my spotty boys ALWAYS get a bad rap!!

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              • #27
                At a recent family event, I was chatting with my know-it-all-pompous-ass Uncle about a new horse I recently acquired. He is actually very knowledgable about many things, like his fancy Mercedes and his top of the line home appliances, all kinds of expensive gadgets... but horses? Not so much.

                He was asking me all kinds of questions but the best one was: At your barn, do you have small stalls or lie-down stalls? me: "lie-down stalls"? Uncle: "yea, you know the ones that the horse can lie down in." Me: Oh! box stalls. Yes, my barn at home has box stalls. Him: yea, lie-down stalls. and gives me this look like I'm nuts for referring to the stall as a box stall.

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                • #28
                  After showing my mom the pretty blue ribbons I'd won from a big road trip, she sighed and said, "I guess she'll never give up the horses now."

                  Years later I got a kick from my own 4 year old daughter who thought a "bridal shower" was a baby shower for a new foal! Hilarious, but what a good idea! Just think of it, all horse presents!

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                  • #29
                    Originally posted by AllyB View Post
                    Years later I got a kick from my own 4 year old daughter who thought a "bridal shower" was a baby shower for a new foal! Hilarious, but what a good idea! Just think of it, all horse presents!
                    Can you imagine if a "bridal shower" was actually a "bridle shower", where people showered you with all sorts of new bridles???? How awesome would that be?
                    Tack Cleaning/All-Things-Tack nut
                    ~DQ wanna-be~

                    Comment

                    • Original Poster

                      #30
                      I don't think it's too late for me to throw myself a bridle shower. I've owned him for little more than a year...I think it'a time for our shower!!

                      Lol! Cute
                      LarkspurCO: no horse's training is complete until it can calmly yet expressively perform GP in stadium filled w/chainsaw juggling zombies riding unicycles while flying monkeys w/bottle rockets...

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                      • #31
                        I've got 2 good ones. First one, I do dressage just at second level and went to Spruce Meadows masters this year for a girls weekend. My sister said "oh are you showing with your horse?" Not only am I not at a level to be showing at such a prestigious competition- I don't jump. haha.
                        Next one is a message I got from an aquaintance just the other day. It said, "hey, not sure if you want another horse or not but the sobeys has an ad up, a guy selling a horse for $800." thanks but no thanks. How do people not realize that that is like me saying "hey not sure if you want another dog or not but there are lots at the local shelter."

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                        • #32
                          Oh people are always asking me "do you ride in winter?" They seem totally baffled that there is such a thing as a heated indoor arena. I always get a kick out of that.

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                          • #33
                            I just got one last night from a guy I met at a party. "Do you ride English? Or EQUESTRIAN?" When I said English, he said "See, I know a thing or two about horses." I tried really hard not to laugh.

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                            • #34
                              I've heard that one recently - "equestrian riding" lol. When asked what I do with my horses, I gave the simple answer "I jump over fences", their reply was nodding and "oh, yeah, equestrian riding".

                              We also had a family recently let us know that they took the saddle off the horse for us "but we left the lap band attached". Ah, okay, so the girth is on the saddle. Gotcha. Perhaps we should be waiting for the instructors to untack the horses folks, please and thanks lol!

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                              • #35
                                I am 63 and showing training level for the first time (and having a blast!).


                                After the last show my daughter in law sent me a text - "I hope you did well in your race."

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                                • #36
                                  Mine is a reverse faux pas.....my boys play hockey and when they would go off-side, I would always call it off-course. Still to this day, I slip up and I get the weirdest looks from spectators at the game.

                                  Years ago, when my husband first came to the barn, he saw for the first time a clipped horse. As the un-clipped hair is darker than the clipped hair, he thought the person dyed the horse's hair for some fashion statement. Yeesh.

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                                  • #37
                                    Originally posted by dreamingofdressage View Post
                                    Can you imagine if a "bridal shower" was actually a "bridle shower", where people showered you with all sorts of new bridles???? How awesome would that be?
                                    Or there are all the misspelled "bridle showers" out there, or the people looking for a new bridal....

                                    But yes, I think a "bridle shower" sounds like something you should do when you get a new horse!

                                    Comment


                                    • #38
                                      Originally posted by dreamingofdressage View Post
                                      Can you imagine if a "bridal shower" was actually a "bridle shower", where people showered you with all sorts of new bridles???? How awesome would that be?
                                      We have alway thrown "bridle showers" when boarders acquired a new horse, but. Not restricted
                                      to bridles. Just any useful horse stuff. Had a cake and treats (for people) too.sorry if spacing odd. Not used to typing on iPad.

                                      Comment


                                      • #39
                                        Originally posted by FEI_JR2004 View Post
                                        I just got one last night from a guy I met at a party. "Do you ride English? Or EQUESTRIAN?" When I said English, he said "See, I know a thing or two about horses." I tried really hard not to laugh.
                                        Possibly because that's what the sport is called in the Olympics and (closer to [some] homes), NCAA athletics?
                                        www.ayliprod.com
                                        Equine Photography in the Northeast

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                                        • #40
                                          OMG this just made my day! LOL

                                          I have so many of these... it's especially hilarious to listen to people talking at the local horse racetrack. I'm often snickering to myself!

                                          My favorite one that I can think of is when I went to get a bite to eat after riding and was right by the local horse racetrack... this olderwoman looked at me smiling and asked "Are you a jockey?!" I'm 5'10"! Hilarious
                                          "Enjoy the little things in life, for one day you may look back & realize they were the big things"

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