• Welcome to the Chronicle Forums.
    Please complete your profile. The forums and the rest of www.chronofhorse.com has single sign-in, so your log in information for one will automatically work for the other. Disclaimer: The opinions expressed here are the views of the individual and do not necessarily reflect the views and opinions of The Chronicle of the Horse.

Announcement

Collapse

Forum rules and no-advertising policy

As a participant on this forum, it is your responsibility to know and follow our rules. Please read this message in its entirety.

Board Rules

1. You’re responsible for what you say.
As outlined in Section 230 of the Communications Decency Act, The Chronicle of the Horse and its affiliates, as well Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd., the developers of vBulletin, are not legally responsible for statements made in the forums.

This is a public forum viewed by a wide spectrum of people, so please be mindful of what you say and who might be reading it—details of personal disputes are likely better handled privately. While posters are legally responsible for their statements, the moderators may in their discretion remove or edit posts that violate these rules. Users have the ability to modify or delete their own messages after posting, but administrators generally will not delete posts, threads or accounts upon request.

Outright inflammatory, vulgar, harassing, malicious or otherwise inappropriate statements and criminal charges unsubstantiated by a reputable news source or legal documentation will not be tolerated and will be dealt with at the discretion of the moderators.

2. Conversations in horse-related forums should be horse-related.
The forums are a wonderful source of information and support for members of the horse community. While it’s understandably tempting to share information or search for input on other topics upon which members might have a similar level of knowledge, members must maintain the focus on horses.

3. Keep conversations productive, on topic and civil.
Discussion and disagreement are inevitable and encouraged; personal insults, diatribes and sniping comments are unproductive and unacceptable. Whether a subject is light-hearted or serious, keep posts focused on the current topic and of general interest to other participants of that thread. Utilize the private message feature or personal email where appropriate to address side topics or personal issues not related to the topic at large.

4. No advertising in the discussion forums.
Posts in the discussion forums directly or indirectly advertising horses, jobs, items or services for sale or wanted will be removed at the discretion of the moderators. Use of the private messaging feature or email addresses obtained through users’ profiles for unsolicited advertising is not permitted.

Company representatives may participate in discussions and answer questions about their products or services, or suggest their products on recent threads if they fulfill the criteria of a query. False "testimonials" provided by company affiliates posing as general consumers are not appropriate, and self-promotion of sales, ad campaigns, etc. through the discussion forums is not allowed.

Paid advertising is available on our classifieds site and through the purchase of banner ads. The tightly monitored Giveaways forum permits free listings of genuinely free horses and items available or wanted (on a limited basis). Items offered for trade are not allowed.

Advertising Policy Specifics
When in doubt of whether something you want to post constitutes advertising, please contact a moderator privately in advance for further clarification. Refer to the following points for general guidelines:

Horses – Only general discussion about the buying, leasing, selling and pricing of horses is permitted. If the post contains, or links to, the type of specific information typically found in a sales or wanted ad, and it’s related to a horse for sale, regardless of who’s selling it, it doesn’t belong in the discussion forums.

Stallions – Board members may ask for suggestions on breeding stallion recommendations. Stallion owners may reply to such queries by suggesting their own stallions, only if their horse fits the specific criteria of the original poster. Excessive promotion of a stallion by its owner or related parties is not permitted and will be addressed at the discretion of the moderators.

Services – Members may use the forums to ask for general recommendations of trainers, barns, shippers, farriers, etc., and other members may answer those requests by suggesting themselves or their company, if their services fulfill the specific criteria of the original post. Members may not solicit other members for business if it is not in response to a direct, genuine query.

Products – While members may ask for general opinions and suggestions on equipment, trailers, trucks, etc., they may not list the specific attributes for which they are in the market, as such posts serve as wanted ads.

Event Announcements – Members may post one notification of an upcoming event that may be of interest to fellow members, if the original poster does not benefit financially from the event. Such threads may not be “bumped” excessively. Premium members may post their own notices in the Event Announcements forum.

Charities/Rescues – Announcements for charitable or fundraising events can only be made for 501(c)(3) tax-exempt organizations. Special exceptions may be made, at the moderators’ discretion and direction, for board-related events or fundraising activities in extraordinary circumstances.

Occasional posts regarding horses available for adoption through IRS-registered horse rescue or placement programs are permitted in the appropriate forums, but these threads may be limited at the discretion of the moderators. Individuals may not advertise or make announcements for horses in need of rescue, placement or adoption unless the horse is available through a recognized rescue or placement agency or government-run entity or the thread fits the criteria for and is located in the Giveaways forum.

5. Do not post copyrighted photographs unless you have purchased that photo and have permission to do so.

6. Respect other members.
As members are often passionate about their beliefs and intentions can easily be misinterpreted in this type of environment, try to explore or resolve the inevitable disagreements that arise in the course of threads calmly and rationally.

If you see a post that you feel violates the rules of the board, please click the “alert” button (exclamation point inside of a triangle) in the bottom left corner of the post, which will alert ONLY the moderators to the post in question. They will then take whatever action, or no action, as deemed appropriate for the situation at their discretion. Do not air grievances regarding other posters or the moderators in the discussion forums.

Please be advised that adding another user to your “Ignore” list via your User Control Panel can be a useful tactic, which blocks posts and private messages by members whose commentary you’d rather avoid reading.

7. We have the right to reproduce statements made in the forums.
The Chronicle of the Horse may copy, quote, link to or otherwise reproduce posts, or portions of posts, in print or online for advertising or editorial purposes, if attributed to their original authors, and by posting in this forum, you hereby grant to The Chronicle of the Horse a perpetual, non-exclusive license under copyright and other rights, to do so.

8. We reserve the right to enforce and amend the rules.
The moderators may delete, edit, move or close any post or thread at any time, or refrain from doing any of the foregoing, in their discretion, and may suspend or revoke a user’s membership privileges at any time to maintain adherence to the rules and the general spirit of the forum. These rules may be amended at any time to address the current needs of the board.

Please see our full Terms of Service and Privacy Policy for more information.

Thanks for being a part of the COTH forums!

(Revised 1/26/16)
See more
See less

Is there life without riding??

Collapse
X
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Is there life without riding??

    So, due to college, career, and financial demands I had to put my horse out on lease. The lease is going wonderfully, my girl is super spoiled and loved at a great barn with a very awesome trainer and two AA's working on 1st/2nd level with her. Really quite happy with how a crappy situation turned out.

    But now I've hit a weird spot in life... I have discovered that there is in fact some weird form of a lifestyle that doesn't heavily involve horses Since I can remember my life has been about riding, working to ride, taking care of horses, or working to pay for my horse. And now I'm not doing any of that and it is just a bizarre experience! I can't believe how simple life is... Although I miss the stress-relieving aspect terribly, and the simple love of being with horses as you all understand.

    Of course I miss riding, too, and can't wait until I'm at a better spot in my life to work on it. But has anyone else on here taken a break? This will probably last another year for me until I'm settled at a job and whatnot. How did you make it through? How was it to go back to riding?

    Any other "break" experiences? Please share and make me feel better! It's all so strange to me!

  • #2
    Even though it must have been really painful, it sounds like you made a wise choice for where you are in your life just now. I took a two-year break from riding so we could afford daycare for my son. I was leasing horses at the time. Honestly, though, I never stopped missing riding. I'd see my saddle on its rack and get all sad. I always knew I'd find a way to start riding again, though, and that kept me going. Is there a barn nearby where you could go hang out, or a therapeutic riding program where you could volunteer?
    Also, I wasnt't able to ride much this winter thanks to the weather, and checking these forums helped a lot.

    Just keep in mind that your situation is temporary

    Comment


    • #3
      I suspect it's only a minority of riders who make it through all of life's ups and downs without taking a break or two! I've had two major breaks myself, once in my 20s when I went to university and once a little over a decade ago when I went BACK to university for my PhD. In the 20-ish years in-between I had ditched academia to be a working student, trainer and teacher. When not riding I always pined for it, but I found that life could be effectively filled up with other hobbies and interests. It's only hard when you meet up with someone who DOES have horses or rides regularly, because then you remember what you're missing.

      I don't think there's ever a cure for it once you've got the bug.... at 50+ when I should be enjoying a relatively secure lifestyle I instead bought myself a 2 year old prospect to bring on myself, just for one last hurrah. So its back to early mornings and late evenings, feeding, mucking out, riding in the rain and the mud, and loving every second. OP, never fear - you can ALWAYS get back to it!
      Proud COTH lurker since 2001.

      Comment


      • #4
        I've taken a few year long breaks - I always miss it, and always wind up back! It takes some time to get your confidence and muscles back unfortunately.

        I think you're doing the right thing though for your life, and you're making sure your horse is taken care of and there for you when you are ready to go back.
        www.felixfjord.blogspot.com

        Comment


        • #5
          My most recent break was in 2002. I sent my senior gelding out on a free lease for a year. It worked out really well. I was recovering from thyroid surgery and really needed the physical and financial break. The woman who leased him had been on a 20 year break. She had wonderful horse property, wanted to see if keeping a horse worked for her and thought leasing was the way to dip her toes back into the water.

          I was surprised to discover that I could fill my time with other activities and it was so very, very nice to free up that much money. It was a huge positive experience for me and when I did get him back a year later, I did so wholeheartedly and with much appreciation.

          Before the break in 2002 I took a 10 year break starting in my mid-20's. I had to sell the mare I owned due to finances and the demands of raising my first child. I hated everything about that break, maybe because I went into not knowing if I would ever make it back.
          Sheilah

          Comment


          • #6
            Took a break after losing an upper level horse. I was just sad and frustrated. I took some time off and focused on an office job. Got some promotions and had more cash than ever before. Also took some expensive trips. But I got out if shape for riding and that was really frustrating when I finally got another horse. I probably should have kept more students so I could hop on something, but focusing on the job that hard sucked up most of my time and energy. (If you're super driven in the horse world I think you can do a good job at other things, but you can't divide yourself and really do both as well as you can if one is a true priority--as I discovered during my break.)

            I do like that I had a break. It helped me feel like I had a better understanding of what I was giving up when I got another horse. It also showed me that I needed to remember that there can be life outside horses--if I ever do not have one for some reason. I actually took on some more artistic endeavors and found that I liked them and was able to continue with them even after my break.
            "And I'm thinking you weren't burdened with an overabundance of schooling." - Capt Reynolds "Firefly"

            Comment


            • #7
              I've taken two long breaks as well: about 6 years each time. I'm now 50. I'm kind of an out of sight out of mind type so when I'm out I'm out. I don't watch horse things or think horsey thoughts. There are plenty of other things out there to keep my attention. When I come back I'm all the wayyyy in. Was harder to get back as a 50yo than it was as a 26yo but I'm back nonetheless. The passion and love stays even if it sits below the surface.
              You don't scare me. I ride a MARE!

              Comment


              • #8
                If you have to ask if there's life without riding, I absolutely think that means it's time to take a break or at least do some rearranging. It's fine to say yes and it's fine to say no -- but it's good to know why you're doing what you're choosing to do!

                I had a break from 15 to 18 and then another of a year when I moved cross-country and left the horse at home until I got myself sorted out. Came back both times stronger than ever, but was (and am!) very glad to know I was doing horses because I wanted to rather than because I didn't know what else to do, and it helped me understand how many options I have and that it is okay to change things up.
                bullyandblaze.wordpress.com

                "The present tense of regret is indecision."
                - Welcome to Night Vale

                Comment


                • #9
                  Yeah -- I have a "break" experience. Almost 17 yrs ago I started having physical issues that made riding very painful.

                  So I started breeding.

                  I do NOT advise this road....

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    A terrible thought

                    like morning without coffee

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Kyzteke View Post

                      So I started breeding.

                      I do NOT advise this road....
                      Sounds like a personal issue!
                      "And I'm thinking you weren't burdened with an overabundance of schooling." - Capt Reynolds "Firefly"

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        I have no doubt there is life after riding and I have arrived at the point where I am ready to explore. I have had at least one horse since I was in 8th grade. I am now 57.

                        I have decided that IF something catastrophic happens to the current horse (as in she dies). I'm done. I certainly don't wish that to happen. She is just 11 and could live another 20 years...and I hope she does. I have devoted all that time (40 plus years) to horses and have done little besides. There are other interests I have that simply do not fit in with the horse so I know I could find something I would like if it came to that.

                        Besides that, I too have a physical pain issue I have not been able to resolve that makes riding no longer very enjoyable. I have been chasing a resolution to the problem (chronic tailbone pain) for about a year and a half. 1 surgery has so far not resolved it but it is still on the short side of when I might see relief so I will suck it up for awhile longer but I hate to see my beautiful mare just sit. If I can't find relief for the problem, I have to decide if I'm going to sell her or not. I hate to but she is too nice to just stand in her pen at the boarding barn. I will either need to find a retirement arrangement for her which is silly to think about for a very sound, very healthy "young" mare. Perhaps a lease? I don't know. I guess I will give my body some more time to heal and worry about that later.

                        Me, I will probably get a dog and start agility training. That looks like a blast. I had to give up dogs when I had to turn to boarding as I am simply not home enough between work and the horse.
                        I miss my dogs too. There is always some trade off I guess.

                        Susan

                        Comment

                        • Original Poster

                          #13
                          It's so helpful to hear everyone else's experiences, thanks for sharing! I had many ups and downs coming to the conclusion that I really didn't have a choice to take this break and hey, life happens. (for once it wasn't "hay, life happens").

                          I can't wait to get back full swing, but it was getting to a point that I was so bogged down trying to get everything done and done well I was really struggling. It's an eye-opening experience.. I have definitely discovered other interests, including sleep, a social life, and exercising muscles that riding/barn work doesn't exercise (LOL who would have thought there were any)

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            I went something like 8 years without really riding. It was always there, and I always wanted to get back to it, but money was an issue. I knew I was going to have to support my mom in her retirement and I knew when I got back in I would want to do so seriously. I was completely unable to do the affordable thing of 1 lesson per week - it tore me up! Since I started at 6, my break from riding which started after college was my first time ever actually having free time. I helped start a political organization, I mentored a kid, I help promote music festivals and bands. I learned I have a passion for concert photography, too. I loved all of it, and still do - but the entire time I knew I would willingly give it all up for horses if it ever came down to making that decision.

                            I don't regret my time without horses, and it makes me appreciate the horses even more. One of my friends refers to me as "zen" about horses - and I don't feel that way, but there's so much love and appreciation for where I am now with the horses, I can definitely take things more in stride than I used to!


                            Originally posted by Kyrabee View Post
                            I have been chasing a resolution to the problem (chronic tailbone pain) for about a year and a half. 1 surgery has so far not resolved it but it is still on the short side of when I might see relief so I will suck it up for awhile longer but I hate to see my beautiful mare just sit. If I can't find relief for the problem, I have to decide if I'm going to sell her or not.
                            Have you ever heard of/tried Feldenkrais? Kim Walnes told me that prior to her two times winning Rolex she had to pad her backside to be able to sit the trot due to tailbone pain, and it was Sally Swift's recommendation of Feldenkrais which helped her. I don't know if your problem is purely skeletal, in which case it won't help - but often there are muscular issues intertwined. Good luck figuring out a resolution!
                            Originally posted by Silverbridge
                            If you get anything on your Facebook feed about who is going to the Olympics in 2012 or guessing the outcome of Bush v Gore please start threads about those, too.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              I was just in the position where I had to decide whether or not to take a break... The financial strain, the lack of time (and lack of social life), the work commitments and a lack of facilities were all adding up and making it very difficult to be able to keep riding.

                              I wasn't quite ready to take that step though, the horse I have now is so talented and I know that if I did have a break and sold her, I'd never be able to afford something of her caliber again. SO I'm still battling, she's moved to a different property with the facilities I need to ride through winter, I've sold 2 horses and have one more that I will sell once I've finished breaking him in (if I can bear to part with him!).

                              I did spend many an hour tossing up this decision - it WOULD be nice to be able to go out and not have to worry about being home to feed and work horses, to fix fences, wash gear and all that... but at the same time, in the forced breaks I have had, even with the horses still being 'in the picture' just not getting ridden, I haven't been able to give it up, even temporarily.

                              Comment


                              • #16
                                There is life without riding. I came back to riding as an adult about 8 years ago. What I've come around to realize the past year is that I actually enjoy care taking more than riding. I have two seniors I enjoy just grooming and walking and talking to. I've contemplated just selling my young horse.

                                Horses tie you down not matter how much you enjoy them. Just have fun now and know horses aren't going anywhere, they'll be there when you decide to come back to the dark side.

                                Comment


                                • #17
                                  I have had a couple of breaks in the past and have decided that since I don't want to live without them and am in a place in my life where other things need to take priority I need to not make as much progress with them as I would like. I have two small ponies and am working on possibly rehoming one of them. I just got a promotion/new job and have a dog and boyfriend who need attention as well. I have no issue juggling all these things but it is the reason that I am not as advanced as I would like to be. I've also had to make compromises as far as expenses and now I do both of their hooves, with supervision, can do shots and keep them at a place without an indoor arena.

                                  When it comes down to it though I really don't know what I would do without them :-)
                                  My little girl, Katai - 13.2 Haflinger/Unicorn
                                  and her blog

                                  "Ponies are the new black. Welcome to the darkside!" - Manahmanah

                                  Comment


                                  • #18
                                    Originally posted by kmmoran View Post
                                    So, due to college, career, and financial demands I had to put my horse out on lease. The lease is going wonderfully, my girl is super spoiled and loved at a great barn with a very awesome trainer and two AA's working on 1st/2nd level with her. Really quite happy with how a crappy situation turned out.

                                    But now I've hit a weird spot in life... I have discovered that there is in fact some weird form of a lifestyle that doesn't heavily involve horses Since I can remember my life has been about riding, working to ride, taking care of horses, or working to pay for my horse. And now I'm not doing any of that and it is just a bizarre experience! I can't believe how simple life is... Although I miss the stress-relieving aspect terribly, and the simple love of being with horses as you all understand.

                                    Of course I miss riding, too, and can't wait until I'm at a better spot in my life to work on it. But has anyone else on here taken a break? This will probably last another year for me until I'm settled at a job and whatnot. How did you make it through? How was it to go back to riding?

                                    Any other "break" experiences? Please share and make me feel better! It's all so strange to me!
                                    Horses are a terminal disease, trust me! So if you're having a brief remission, take advantage of it by seeing What Else Is Out There. Those experiences will serve you well when you return (retreat?) to Our Horsey World. In my case, the only break I've ever taken since 1973 was 3 years when I was in college and then working my first and only corporate job--to detox, I spent all my vacations, weekends and days off working on offshore fishing boats with my boyfriend and cousin--the money was great, the adventures priceless!

                                    Now, when I'm yanking the wheelbarrow through the frozen ruts in a screaming wind full of horizontal sleet, I just say to the horses, "Hey, there are WORSE troubles at sea!" I know, 'cause I've seen 'em!

                                    Comment


                                    • #19
                                      I have taken multiple breaks. I regret most of them -- in fact, I regret all of them except the one I really had no choice but to take.

                                      I did lots of cool stuff while I was "on break." Tennis, boxing, workaholicism, piano lessons, cheerleading (it was in college), russian lessons, makeup hoarding, excercising just a wee bit too much, travel, being social (also in college). I randomly bought a microscope. Invested in some cool purses I never use. Watched old TV shows I missed the first time around.

                                      Ultimately I returned to riding after each break to find a rustier, less-compliant body and diminished skills. I wish I hadn't taken the majority of the breaks (the voluntary ones).

                                      That doesn't mean there aren't awesome things to do and other fulfilling ways to live. Those just aren't *my* ways. There's always an emptiness I'm trying to fill when I spend too long away from horses. If I had it all to do over again, I'd try to find a way to just at least take the occasional lesson or groom the occasional horse. Maybe try a different discipline, or volunteer at a therapeutic riding center once in a while or something. It's possible to keep a thread between oneself and horses without full-on doing the serious riding thing.

                                      Comment


                                      • #20
                                        Originally posted by kmmoran View Post
                                        So, due to college, career, and financial demands I had to put my horse out on lease. The lease is going wonderfully, my girl is super spoiled and loved at a great barn with a very awesome trainer and two AA's working on 1st/2nd level with her. Really quite happy with how a crappy situation turned out.

                                        But now I've hit a weird spot in life... I have discovered that there is in fact some weird form of a lifestyle that doesn't heavily involve horses Since I can remember my life has been about riding, working to ride, taking care of horses, or working to pay for my horse. And now I'm not doing any of that and it is just a bizarre experience! I can't believe how simple life is... Although I miss the stress-relieving aspect terribly, and the simple love of being with horses as you all understand.

                                        Of course I miss riding, too, and can't wait until I'm at a better spot in my life to work on it. But has anyone else on here taken a break? This will probably last another year for me until I'm settled at a job and whatnot. How did you make it through? How was it to go back to riding?

                                        Any other "break" experiences? Please share and make me feel better! It's all so strange to me!
                                        Of course there is life without horses And remember, there is also the possibility of life without horses *fulltime,* as well, if and when that makes sense. (Meaning you can half lease, or take lessons, or whatever without the need to do the whole "living/breathing/daily ritual" thing that often accompanies horse ownership.)

                                        I have had horses, with the exception of the four years I spent in college, since I was 16. I am now almost 50! And I've done it in a variety of scenarios, from just-starting-out-starving-college-grad to now having a c-level job in a reasonably large company. There have been times when I rode very little, due to work or family responsibilities or financial pressures, and other times when I rode a ton, showed a lot and got to do a little point chasing (making up for my deprived childhood, LOL.)

                                        I have to admit that the times when I leased my horses out some, or had some other arrangement where I did not have to be at the barn 5-6 days a week were pretty much the best, as much as I love my horses and truly enjoy riding. It was nice to have the time/energy/money to take some really awesome vacations with my family, for example, that I wouldn't have been able to pull off without that half lease arrangement. Or invest in some home improvements - a new kitchen, a major reno, a swimming pool - with $$$ that would otherwise have gone into board/vet/farrier/lessons/training/showing at a BNT barn.

                                        My advice is to take this break and use it to explore other things you've always wanted to explore or maybe never even considered. Horses will be there when you are ready to go back to them, in whatever form or fashion you elect. IMO it is one of the great advantages of riding compared to many other sports; it is something you can do throughout a lifetime, not just when you are young.
                                        **********
                                        We move pretty fast for some rabid garden snails.
                                        -PaulaEdwina

                                        Comment

                                        Working...
                                        X