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A great year for snakes

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  • The last time I moved a snapping turtle out of the road--and it was a HUGE ONE--I found a very long plank in the ditch and walked over, intending to shove it off.

    It leaped about two feet, grabbed the plank and bit down. After my eyes stopped bugging out--and knowing that it wouldn't let go until sundown (cause my grandma tol' me so ) I just towed it off the road and left it to munch.

    Having seen that thing jump, and how fast, I'd never get within 10 feet of one.
    Ring the bells that still can ring
    Forget your perfect offering
    There is a crack in everything
    That's how the light gets in.

    Comment


    • Ahem.

      I do like snakes, JSwan, I do!
      And I would like them on a windowsill.
      I would like them wrapped round my coffee mill.

      I would like to introduce Zuzu to them
      In such a way she could appreciate them.
      Maybe if she felt their skin so supple
      She wouldn't think they were so much trouble.
      Someone who is always so optimistic
      Should appreciate a critter so fantistic!

      I would like snakes in my barn
      I would like snakes wrapped round my arm.
      I would like them with their forked tongues
      I would like them old or young.
      I'm not ignoring the rules. I'm interpreting the rules. Tamal, The Great British Baking Show

      Comment


      • Originally posted by MelantheLLC View Post
        The last time I moved a snapping turtle out of the road--and it was a HUGE ONE--I found a very long plank in the ditch and walked over, intending to shove it off.

        It leaped about two feet, grabbed the plank and bit down. After my eyes stopped bugging out--and knowing that it wouldn't let go until sundown (cause my grandma tol' me so ) I just towed it off the road and left it to munch.

        Having seen that thing jump, and how fast, I'd never get within 10 feet of one.
        Yeah. DH kinda creeps up from behind them. Strange animal to feel such affection for, no? Makes me wonder what he sees in me.
        I'm not ignoring the rules. I'm interpreting the rules. Tamal, The Great British Baking Show

        Comment


        • pAint Misbehavin', you are not right
          Snakes aren't good in day or night
          They're scary and they hide all day
          In the grass or in the hay
          Or in the woods or on the trail
          Or right along the arena rail
          I've found them on my bedroom floor
          In the kitchen, by the door
          It startles me so I always scream
          And hope it's just a bad, bad dream
          If you want them on your windowsill
          Or wrapped around your coffee mill
          Just keep them there, out of my sight
          If you're sure you'll be alright
          And won't get scared and start to curse
          Or whack them with your mighty purse
          'Cause then JSwan would rant and spit
          And have herself a hissy fit
          "Don't hurt a house snake!" she would say
          And repeat it all throughout the day

          Comment


          • Originally posted by Donkaloosa View Post
            pAint Misbehavin', you are not right
            Snakes aren't good in day or night
            They're scary and they hide all day
            In the grass or in the hay
            Or in the woods or on the trail
            Or right along the arena rail
            I've found them on my bedroom floor
            In the kitchen, by the door
            It startles me so I always scream
            And hope it's just a bad, bad dream
            If you want them on your windowsill
            Or wrapped around your coffee mill
            Just keep them there, out of my sight
            If you're sure you'll be alright
            And won't get scared and start to curse
            Or whack them with your mighty purse
            'Cause then JSwan would rant and spit
            And have herself a hissy fit
            "Don't hurt a house snake!" she would say
            And repeat it all throughout the day
            Oh, Donkaloosa, I am right!
            Suppose I have a hot flash in the night.
            A footless friend may cool my brow
            better than a warm puppy anyhow!
            Also, being an exotherm
            He cannot infect me with a germ.
            A snake's the bedfellow to have all right
            When one wakes up sweaty in the night.
            I'm not ignoring the rules. I'm interpreting the rules. Tamal, The Great British Baking Show

            Comment


            • Originally posted by Zu Zu View Post
              My goodness ``` let's allow people deal with their snakes in their own way !

              Jingles for all snake haters to enjoy a summer without too many sightings and then only of non-posionous snakes....

              while you snake lovers enjoy a summer filled with many wild & venomous snakes ~

              and of course ...

              Jingles for ALL snakes to enjoy some uninterrupted sunshine ~
              Zu-Zu, did you get permission to use the 7 or so capital letters in this post?

              Don't mind Breezy oops I mean Bacardi. But whatever you do, don't ask her about easy breezy freezey cheesy dip. It gives her the yips.
              "Aye God, Woodrow..."

              Comment


              • Oh no, oh no, this can't be right
                To have a snake come spend the night
                I'd know I'd rather have that flash
                And cool down with a water splash
                Don't like those snakes, give them a smack
                Before they give me a heart attack
                They like to wave, and maybe mean no harm
                (How can they wave without an arm?)
                You keep your snake all cuddled up tight
                I'd rather be sweaty in the night

                Comment


                • Originally posted by Donkaloosa View Post
                  Oh no, oh no, this can't be right
                  To have a snake come spend the night
                  I'd know I'd rather have that flash
                  And cool down with a water splash
                  Don't like those snakes, give them a smack
                  Before they give me a heart attack
                  They like to wave, and maybe mean no harm
                  (How can they wave without an arm?)
                  You keep your snake all cuddled up tight
                  I'd rather be sweaty in the night
                  Snakes like body heat. Of course they do,
                  for they can't warm themselves. It's true,
                  sometimes snakes surprise one in the night,
                  and a surprise snake may give one a fright.
                  But stay thy hand - pray do not smack!
                  Lest some reptile bite thee back!
                  I'm not ignoring the rules. I'm interpreting the rules. Tamal, The Great British Baking Show

                  Comment


                  • I will not smack a wandering snake
                    Whether in my house or in the lake
                    Or in the barn, the yard or car
                    Or having a drink at the local bar
                    Because they make me jump and yelp
                    And holler frantically for some help
                    I shoot up sky high once I see 'em
                    And very, very, loudly scree-um

                    Comment


                    • Wow, all my snappers hop up & spin around so fast to snap it makes your head dizzy! They are called snappers for a reason. Do be very careful. they can do some serious damage to a finger, hand, leg.
                      "Police officers are public servants. Not James Bond with a license to kill."

                      Comment


                      • This is becoming a "must read" thread. Thank you to all the great poets here. It takes a lot to make me laugh about snakes but you all are doing it!!!

                        From April- October I rarely go a day without seeing a snake so I have learned to accept them (but not like them). I still yelp at the sight of them. I appreciate the king snakes and gopher snakes but I hate rattlers. I had a horse bitten by one, which does tend to cause heavy dislike. One summer I had a nest of rattlesnakes underneath my hay pallets - that was a very, very, very long summer. I've had rattlers in my house on more than one occasion. UPS will no longer deliver to our door because of the large number of snakes. I have the Fire Dept. on speed-dial (for rattler removal/extinction).

                        On a positive note, I was thrilled to read weasels go after snakes because we now have a family of weasels. I hope they do their job.

                        OK, turning it back to the poets. Go at it. And I think ZuZu needs to try her hand at snake poetry.
                        R.I.P. Ollie (2007-2010) You were small in stature but huge in spirit. You will never be forgotten.

                        Godspeed, Benjamin (1998-2014). A life well-lived. A horse well-loved.

                        Comment


                        • Answering the ljc request for a Zu Zu snake poem ~ hay delivery pressed for time !

                          ok OK !! Here you go canter ~

                          Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet eating her curds and whey ~

                          Along came a snake .......SO

                          she beat the Hell out of it with her SPOON !!!

                          OH NO !!!!

                          i can't believe i wrote that ooops
                          Zu Zu Bailey " IT'S A WONDERFUL LIFE ! "

                          Comment


                          • Snaky, snaky in the grass
                            Do not come here, you may not pass
                            Do not creep, do not crawl
                            Do not come in and start a brawl
                            Don't flap your lips, don't give me a glare
                            Just go back to your snaky lair

                            Comment


                            • Originally posted by MelantheLLC View Post
                              The last time I moved a snapping turtle out of the road--and it was a HUGE ONE--I found a very long plank in the ditch and walked over, intending to shove it off.

                              It leaped about two feet, grabbed the plank and bit down. After my eyes stopped bugging out--and knowing that it wouldn't let go until sundown (cause my grandma tol' me so ) I just towed it off the road and left it to munch.

                              Having seen that thing jump, and how fast, I'd never get within 10 feet of one.
                              Well, I knew they could bite, but wow. And, this big boy was MAD. I'll probably drive into town later and find him back in the road again!
                              www.Somermistfarm.com
                              Quality Hunter Ponies

                              Comment


                              • Originally posted by Zu Zu View Post
                                ok OK !! Here you go canter ~

                                Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet eating her curds and whey ~

                                Along came a snake .......SO

                                she beat the Hell out of it with her SPOON !!!

                                OH NO !!!!

                                i can't believe i wrote that ooops

                                Originally posted by Donkaloosa View Post
                                Snaky, snaky in the grass
                                Do not come here, you may not pass
                                Do not creep, do not crawl
                                Do not come in and start a brawl
                                Don't flap your lips, don't give me a glare
                                Just go back to your snaky lair
                                Love it. I will stay over here and the snakes can stay anywhere else, and we will all be fine.
                                www.Somermistfarm.com
                                Quality Hunter Ponies

                                Comment


                                • Ah ZU ZU, DH shares your passion for snakes.

                                  Yesterday was quite the circus. I hear this shriek, sounded like someone was murdered. I look out the window and DH is just booking towards the house, arms pumping and legs going as fast as they can. The dog is right behind him, barking. Aaaand behind the dog, the cat. WTF? Bear, mountain lion, serial killer? DH comes blasting thru the door, lets the dog in, then slams the door on the cat. Huh?

                                  Well the "Kitteah" caught a 5-6" snake and wanted to show off her "prize" and was following DH around going "rumpff, rumpff".

                                  He didn't realize what she had until he went pet her and tell her what a good kitty she was. He hates snakes!

                                  Comment


                                  • Originally posted by pAin't_Misbehavin' View Post
                                    Snakes like body heat. Of course they do,
                                    for they can't warm themselves. It's true,
                                    sometimes snakes surprise one in the night,
                                    and a surprise snake may give one a fright.
                                    But stay thy hand - pray do not smack!
                                    Lest some reptile bite thee back!
                                    Ask any cowboy true
                                    While sleeping in his kak
                                    How waking at dusk as due
                                    Found a rattler with him in the sack.

                                    Comment


                                    • Yes but do snakes like Salsa? How about year old salsa? It's been in the fridge the whole time...

                                      Comment


                                      • Having read this thread I have never been so grateful for St.Paddy!!
                                        The biggest thing we have to deal with are worms

                                        Massive kudos to all you COTH'ers who have to deal with snakes, spiders, bears, mountain lions, aligators, sharks.......I get the sweats just typing that!!
                                        http://www.redhills-stud.ie/

                                        http://www.facebook.com/home.php#!/KildareLivery

                                        Comment


                                        • I used to have house snakes at my old house. I think I caught four ~18" rat snakes in the house (well, one got away under the stove never to be seen again). House cats usually let me know there was a one in the house. They did kill a baby that was about 4" long.

                                          I had another snake in the garage that just kept coming back. He was larger - maybe 3'. When he came back after third time I tossed him out, I just left him alone and named him George.
                                          "Dogs are man's best friend. Cats are man's adorable little serial killer." -- theoatmeal.com

                                          Comment

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